Setbacks

"What are you doing here?" Sasya asked

Being polite and with a very despair heart, Jay excused himself and entered the apartment first. Still in a disbelief state, Sasya did not move a muscle when Daniel made his way to her, giving her that charming smile like he used to give ever since the first time the both of them met. From knowing her parents pretty well, Sasya truly knows that Daniel was being sent here to bring her back and she had a strong sense that something big was going to happen and it will not be up to her liking at all.

"You're only a few weeks away and I already missed your angelic face," Daniel said, about to come closer when Sasya backed away a few steps

"We need to talk. Let's go somewhere else," Sasya showed some signs of seriousness in her tone

Jay watched them go with full of jealousy and misery.

***

Sasya and Daniel went to a nearby cafe which was quite deserted and had that European atmosphere when you were in there because of the interior deisgn of the cafe itself. Daniel had been blabbering about how much he missed Sasya, including about the marriage plan that both of their parents were to eager to proceed it. Daniel's strong determination was too expecting that he even started talking about their after marriage life, while Sasya waited patiently for him to end his past and future story telling which ended half an hour later.

"Haiz, Daniel, can I be direct to you?" Sasya asked

Daniel gave a hand signal for her to continue.

"Listen, I know you're not prepared to hear this but I had been keeping it for too long and I feel bad from hiding it from you. Daniel, I really appreciate the fact that you tried very hard to maintain this relationship but I'm requesting you to stop because I had a feeling that it's not going to work," Sasya confessed

"Huh? What do you mean?" Daniel exclaimed, creasing his eyebrows

"Honestly, I don't intend to have feelings for anyone even before our parents planned to set up a blind date for us. I seriously have no intention to start any relationship yet. You may think I'm being a bit fussy and stuff but my feelings to you have never ever grown ever since we met. I just want to focus on my hobby which is to travel because that was the only way I could escape from being a puppet in the family," Sasya told him as Daniel projected a 'lost hope' kinda face

"If you really want to know, throughtout my entire life of living, I had been doing things through forcing ways thanks to my parents who had been making decision for me instead of me deciding on how I want to design my own future path. I don't understand why they have to be so worried that they have to restrict me from being independent. Haiz... Unlike you, you have the looks, you have a great career but do you ever think for a second that it will be such a waste if you were to listen to what your parents say, instead of following what your heart says? Trust me Daniel, you may fall for me now, but you have not picture yourself ahead in life. From the way I see, you like me because your parents told you to right?" Sasya assumed

Daniel could felt his own heart pounding ceaselessly as he stare at one spot to reflect on the honest coffession by her. However, he got to admit that he agreed on most of it.

"So, can you do me a favour and don't make situation difficult for me? There are much more better girls out there that you deserved. I had been force countless of times and I do not have the chance to make my own decisions. At least when it was about my love life, please allow me to decide on who is the right one for me? I'm already sick and tired for having no freedom in choosing things to be the way I wanted it to be. I hope you understand me and I'm truly sorry to ruin your day with this awful news. I wish you all the best in your future. I'll get going first," Sasya said and make her leave

She was halfway through opening the glass door...

"Apart from all that reason, was the guy you're with previously outside your apartment, one of your reason?" he asked

Sasya took a few seconds to gather some courage to answer that.

"Yes," she answered and leave quickly before he were to bombard her with questions

She reached home looking so glum when Jay welcome her home as per normal, pretending that he was not heartbroken at all. Jay's welcome message was being ignored and Sasya reamain silent all the way, making her way straight into her room. She felt bad for shattering an innocent heart but Daniel asked for it and she was glad that she managed to actually told her true feelings rather than to hide it forever.

***

It was already past midnight and Jay was in the living room, still wide awake. He hoped Sasya was ok as she had been in her room ever since she got back. Then, the moment that he had been waiting for finally came true as he heard the sound of the squeaking door.

"You're awake too? Let's watch something," said Sasya who was turning on the television

After browsing channels after channels, she stopped by a random channel showing some korean drama series. Too bad there were no subtitles and as the movie kept on playing, Sasya's eyes tend to get more and more sleepy. She yawned for a couple of times and felt kinda fed up for not understanding what the movie was about.

"What is the movie about?" she asked, hugging her pillow tightly

Jay who wasn't concentrating fully on the movie heard her and he went on to summarise what happened on the previous scenes.

"It's about a guy from Italy who went to Korea for a vacation. Throughout his one month vacation, he kept bumping into the same particular girl which somehow got him so earger to know more about her. Each time they met, the guy seemed to be falling for her more," Jay explained, recalling back about his first meeting with Sasya at the fish pancake pushcart causing his lips to curve into a small smile

Due to his strong feelings towards her, Jay was having an intention to give her some obvious hints, pretending that he was explaining, what the entire movie was about but the truth was he was actually telling about his real feelings towards her instead.

"They started to hang out with each other and the guy became more and more attracted towards the girl's undeniably, irresistable beauty and her bubbly character. She was a very kind soul sent from the above who never fails to help people who are in need. Always made the guy feel wanted, giving useful advice and most importantly, she is always there for the guy through tough and misery moments that he encountered. She's like the light leading towards happiness," Jay continued

"But sadly, the guy managed to find out that she has someone else in her life and he was utterly heartbroken upon knowing the truth that he cried in silence without her knowing. It felt like pieces of sharp torns was being pierced through his poor heart that everything was too late now. He put the blame on hiumself for not telling his true feelings beforehand," Jay lamented how he felt when he saw her and that stranger walking off together side by side earlier

Sasya gave no response in return and reason being was because she fell asleep with her head resting on Jay's broad shoulder. Jay felt a bit disappointed that Sasya missed the chance to listen to his hints but at the same time felt a bit relief because he was afraid of negative response which he finds it stupid at times.

He carried her to her room and sat down on her bed, a few inches away beside her. As usual, Sasya's flawless beauty made it so hard for him to stare away from her. He traced her jawline using his fingertips and whispered.

"Haiz... Why must you be someone else's girl?"

Then, he felt something hard around his backbone area as he leaned backwards. Happened to be a lime green notebook. He began to read page by page till he realised it was her personal travelling diary. It's rude to lay hands on people's stuff but when it comes to this kind of thing, it's just hard to obey some manners. He flipped through every page, reading about her life story and kinda giggled softly to himself upon reading some hilarious stuffs about her. Until when he came across a page about their first meeting.

"Haha, mohawk haired guy? That's what she used to identify me?" Jay's heart raved in happiness

The more he read, the more unexpected things tend to be exposed. Especially her feelings towards him which was a bit similiar to his feelings towards her. Having high hopes that they might be together in the future, Jay heaved a sigh of relief.

"But is she for real? Or is she just writing this for fun? Hmm... don't set high hopes Jay, just don't!" he reminded himself and enjoyed the rest of his nights reading their moments written on that diary.

***

Another day was being welcome by the roaring of thunder and flashes of forked lightning. The morning was cold and wet with a brisk of wind sweeping the rain across the land. Sasya had been spending most of her time in her room, reflecting about her life, family and many more that never seemed to stop haunting her, especially the moment Daniel appeared out of nowhere in front of her yesterday. She hated the fact that her life was being controlled, she hated the fact that her parents don't fully trust her although she was already 20 and she hated the fact for having to hurt an innocent person's heart for such an annoying but yet common reason which was 'love'.

Living life has always been complicated. It starts before we're ready, it continues while we're still trying to figure out the point of it and it ends long before we've worked out just what to do. Just by thinking all of her setbacks and hardships that she have to go through in her life, she couldn't take it anymore that it was all being replaced by tears.

Being the only child, upon not having so much close friends in college and since her parents were so busy with their own working life, crying and depressed in secret was kinda normal to Sasya. Sometimes she felt better but there were times it haunts her till today. She kept on repeating that she will be fine but those tears of hers told her otherwise and she sank into melancholy, shedding more of it. Sadness tremendsouly took control of her that she didn't realised it was almost 7pm until she heard a knock on her door. Jay who had been worrying about Sasya's condition can't help himself to wait but to enter her room. Sasya composed herself as Jay took a sit beside her.

"Didn't know your room was so interesting that you actually spent 3 quarter of your time here. Haha!" Jay crakced a joke but silence was what he get as a respond

"What time is it already? (checking the time)...Oh it's 7pm already?" Sasya exclaimed and went back to her glum self

She was so in low spirits when Jay tried other ways to make her feel better.

"You know if you have any problems that's bothering you, the least you could do was to reduce some of it by sharing ti with me right? You may not tell the whole problem because I respect your personal matters but is there anything you would want me to help you. I hate to see you cry like this," Jay said

"Me crying? Ha...ha.... I'm not crying...I'm fine," she lied and faked a laugh when more tears flow out automatically

Sasya looked at a different direction, covering half of her face to control her tears at the same time to not show her weak side but Jay couldn't take it that he brought her face to face him gently and wipe off those tears away.

"You can lie to anyone but not me. I know what's real and what's fraud. Those tears of yours are really begging me to stop it from flowing. So can you please tell me what has been bothering you? If you treat me as your friend, let it out to me. I'm prepared to help," Jay said in an assuring tone

As much as she wanted to hide her soft, fragile side, Jay successfully managed to persuade her. With that they had a heart to heart chat with each other and most of it was a tremendous misery. It took them almost an hour to finished their talk when Jay heard Sasya's stomach grumbling loudly that Sasya blushed in embarrassment as usual. Sasya endured her hunger by putting a bit of pressure to stop those weird noises which made Jay giggled.

"You're lucky to have a chef in the house. Hold on, I'll get you something," Jay said and proceed to the kitchen

In 10 minutes time, Jay was back with a plate of creamy cabonara spaghetti. The aroma of it made Sasya's stomach went wild.

"Wow, you have many hidden talents. You're so qualified to be a house husband. Hahaha! Have you eaten?" she asked

"Yeap, two rounds already. Now it's yout turn," he told her, already in a standby position to feed her

Once the food was being shoved into , the delicious flavours exploded. She spend some moments to enjoy the taste before swallowing it down . "IT'S DELICIOUS! You gotta teach me how to cook that!" Sasya said enthusiastically as Jay wipe the stains of the creamy sauce at the side of her lips. The feeding session ended a few minutes later and this time, Sasya volunteered to wash the dishes.

"We should have some desert," Jay suggested and took out a watermelon from the fridge to chop it into cubes. Sasya ended off by washing the plate when she heard Jay screaming in pain. In a panic state, she rushed towards him and happened to find out that his finger was profusely bleeding. Quickly she dragged Jay to the sink to washed off the blood that was oozing out and took a couple of tissue to cover the wound.

"Hold on to this. I'll find an ointment and plaster. OMG!!! Just hang in there Jay!" she exclaimed panicly, running back and forth

The wound doesn't even have a very great painful impact and watching Sasya being in a panic and concern mode brought smile to Jay who found it cute when she tend to have that disbelief or shocking expressions. She was acting like as if a major accident had happened when it was only a small, tiny wound. Her actions would never failed to get Jay attracted to it. Jay chuckled and told her to calm down.

After finding whatever she needed, without wasting time, she dashed to him and apply the ointment on the wound when Jay decided to play a fool with her, making those sudden painful action that made Sasya jerked backwards in fear.

"OMG! OMG!!!!! Sorry!! Does it hurt?!! So sorry, just hang on ok. I just have to put this plaster and it's done," Sasya trembled and in an instant covered the wound with the plaster

"Hahahahahahah!! Ouch? I realised you love to fall for tricks easily eh? Chill, it doesn't hurt," Jay confirmed with her

"UGH!! Screw you!! Aiish,seong-gasin sonyeon (annoying boy)!!" snarled Sasya with her hands on her hips

"Woah...like finally seotuleun sonyeo (clumsy girl) speak korean to me!!" Jay disturbed back

"Oh, you didn't just called me clumsy!"

***

They spent the night stuffing their mouths with watermelons and laughing out loud upon the hilarious jokes and non-sense games they had created.

"Ok, Ok let's click the next button to see what's the next dare," Sasya enthusiastically said

Jay clicked on the NEXT button and a dare appeared on the screen. [Say to a random girl/guy that you had a crush on him/her]

Since the start of the game, Jay had been getting dares that was either hard or embarrassing to accomplish. Sasya quickly retrieve his phone and told him that she will decide on who should be that lucky girl by scrolling through his contact list. A very playfully smirked appeared on her face when she pressed the call button and without showing him his phone screen, she put it on loud speaker. She kept on holding just incase Jay were to check which could turn the surprise into a spoiler.

"Why am I having a feeling that the person I'm about to communicate with will give me a harsh response?" Jay wondered and Sasya just shift her shoulders up and down, causing the suspicion to grow.

"Yoboseyo?" answered the lucky girl

"Halmeoni?(Grandmother)!!" Jay shrieked in disbelief

"Are pigs learning how to fly? You've never ever once called me unlike Taeyang. Did something happened?" she asked eagerly

Jay couldn't control his laughter that he moved his phone away for a while and tend to get this dare over and done with.

"Halmeoni, I have a crush on you!!" Jay exclaimed crazily

"WHAT?!!! ARE YOU DRUNK?? AIISH THIS BOY!" scolded his grandmother and hung up on him

Laughter filled up the entire apartment due to the harsh reponse. They continue to play till they decided to end the game after one final dare which happened to be Jay's turn again. Dare: (Say out the name of the girl/guy you've fallen deeply in love with recently)

"Woah... so tell me. Who's that ideal type of girl that you've been telling me for the past few days. Finally I get to know it thanks to this game! Tell me Jay," Sasya raved

"You really wanna know?" Jay asked

"Yeah! You don't mind don't you?" she asked back

At last, the moment that Jay had been waiting for has arrived. Every men will experienced a one of a kind fear when it comes to proposing but it's a matter whether you have the guts to do so or not. He felt so nervous that his palms started to sweat.

"Well, the girl that I've been telling you about is actually...y...," Jay stuttered when his conversation were being interrupted by Sasya's phone ringtone.

Sasya did a moody groan and excuse herself for a second to answer the call from her mum. Jay was utterly close in exposing when something just have to crop up. He don't even know whether to feel thankful for that call or to feel angry for interrupting the most important and meaningful conversation ever. Sasya was having a rough and arguementative conversation with her mum when she stood still and her entire face turned pale upon the news that was just being informed by her mum.

"W...wh...wha...what? Mum...R..re...peat wh..what y..you ..ju..just...s...said," Sasya sobbed

Her mum repeated whatever she just said and Sasya's sobs turned into a continuous one. Jay who was so curious, joined her at the balcony. The moment her eyes met Jay, she burst into tears and accidentally dropped her phone to the ground. The news had a great impact on her causing her to root down with Jay who kept on questioning her about her sudden changed in reaction.

"What happened?" Jay asked, surrounding his arms around her shoulder

"Tskk....tsk....tsk.....Jay," she lamented