“You clench your teeth. You look up. You tell yourself that if they see you cry,

it will hurt them and you will be nothing but a sadness in their eyes…,” – John Green

Soundtrack: (x)

With a paper bag in his right hand, Chanyeol walked as fast as he could around the whole floor, eyes scanning each ward he walked past. He has been strolling around the hospital lobby since nine in the morning with his trusty old friend, Baekhyun (whom as a matter of fact has been complaining nonstop since before nine) and the moment the visiting hours start, he darted straight towards the tenth floor. There was only one person he wanted to meet- and that was Lee Mina.

“Seriously, what do you have against this girl anyway? Who is she anyway? What does she want from you? Is she that important that we had to spend the whole morning here-”

“Baekhyun,” Chanyeol turned around abruptly, snapping at his friend. “You’re too loud and this is a floor filled with cancer patients,” He continued in a matter-of-fact tone.

“But I- but this is- aish, you’re ridiculous,”

His complaints settled into a grumble, and that was enough to satisfy Chanyeol as he continued on his search. His eyes settled on a room number 10-3-6 with a name Lee Mina slipped just underneath it. Chanyeol sighed in relief as he rapped the door twice with his knuckles before entering the ward as quiet as possible (this wouldn’t be the case if Baekhyun did not trail behind).

Snuggled comfortably in her bed was indeed Mina as she stared at the overhead television, flicking through the channels. Her gaze moved from the television towards her new visitor before her face turned from recognition to shock.

“What are you doing here?”

“You were wrong- about yesterday. About dying and pain and flaws,”

Sitting not far from her was another boy, probably the same age, if not older than Chanyeol. He had full chubby cheeks and slanted eyes, and he reminded Chanyeol so much of his mother’s dumplings for some reason. He stared back with pure astonishment, obviously shocked by his sudden intrusion.

“I… hi- um, I’m Chanyeol. I’m a volunteer here, and I’m Mina’s friend,”

“We’re not friends,” He was interrupted by Mina’s cold voice.

“-Or soon to be friend, if you’d like that much better,” Chanyeol replied back, sharp and quick with his words unlike yesterday. “And you are wrong about yesterday. About… about dying. You’re not dying, Mina. You’ve just got a touch of cancer. I know how you think your world is about to end just because you suddenly have this cruel disease, but… don’t let that define you. Have a little bit of respect for yourself, at least. You don’t want to die as ‘the person who died because of cancer’, I can tell you that. I bet there are so many great things about you, and yet you chose to be the person who dies of cancer? Reconsider your choices, Mina,”

He felt a tug of his sleeve from Baekhyun, but he ignored him as he continued.

“There are so many people struggling for their lives at this moment, and you’re here, healthy enough to be watching midday soap operas, and you’d want me to let you jump off the roof if you tried? That’s such a selfish move. You might put your pain to a stop, but imagine the pain of others- the pain of your family and friends,”

“Chanyeol, I think that’s enough-” Baekhyun tried to cut him off, in fear that his giant friend would start a commotion. After all, he was the one who said that they both were in a cancer ward.

“Anyway, I apologise for my intrusion, and um- here’s a lunch box set. There’s nothing much- it’s uh… some rice and salmon. If you don’t want to get better, then that’s fine- but you don’t know the meaning of life until you taste my mother’s lunch boxes,” Chanyeol pushed the plastic container and a carton of banana milk onto her trolley. “I… enjoy your lunch,”

It was finally time for Chanyeol to realise how intrusive he was- how inappropriate his entrance was and he wanted nothing but disappear into thin air. With an awkward bow, he took a couple steps backwards and left the room, with an equally embarrassed Baekhyun trailing behind.

Mina did nothing but stare at the boy walking away from her.

“Chanyeol, what the hell was that?” That would be the umpteenth time Baekhyun has asked him the moment they got out of the hospital ward.

“What the hell was what?” Their other friend, Jongdae interrupted as he slid into the bench at their table at the campus cafeteria.

“Ah, you should’ve seen our soap opera hero and the stunt he pulled today, like I don’t even know where to start-”

“-I basically barged in to a cancer patient’s ward and gave her a lunch box, banana milk and a life lesson,”

Both boys stared at Jongdae who at that time stared at the both of them with the most scrutinising eyebrows he has ever put on display.

“What?”

Chanyeol sighed before he began again. “I was at the rooftop yesterday, and there was this girl who was practically climbing off the roof. Of course the first thing that came to my mind was that she was about to jump off, and I saved her, and turns out she didn’t even want to jump after all…”

His gaze moved from his clasped hands to the faces of his two best friends and judging from how they both were gaping at him, he took it as a sign to continue.

“We had a little chat, and she was talking about her cancer and how it’s the end of her world and her world only. And she was talking about the pain she ends if she ever decides to jump off the building. And that… made me angry. That’s not how cancer works. It’s like… it’s like she’s letting cancer define her whole life now,”

Baekhyun merely exchanged looks with Jongdae before he continued. “Um… Chanyeol, it’s good that you’re volunteering and honestly, that’s really noble- something Jongdae and I can’t probably achieve on our own will, but… you need to stop letting your personal life get into the course of your work,”

Chanyeol stopped munching on his plate of ddeokbokki. He expected his two best friends to at least agree with him. He didn’