The feeling of being alone; I hate it. 

Sehun felt the first drop of rain hit his head. Then the downpour began. Sehun looked up at the sky and blinked the rain out of his eyes. Water was soaking his clothes, the white dress shirt sticking to his skin. "Are you crying too?" he asked. 

The feeling of being abandoned by those you love; I hate it even more. 

The rain pelted against Sehun's head and shoulders and he shivered from the cold. He didn't want to leave yet. His eyes were wet with tears, his hair drenched in cold water. The flowers were also being hit with water drops, the petals looking so pitiful to Sehun's eyes. There was an empty feeling in his chest. "I miss you a lot, Jongin. So much..." But even those words weren't enough to convey the feeling he felt. Sehun let out a shaky breath, tears gliding down his pale cheek and mixing with the rain. 

Sehun didn't know how long he kneeled there, but he knew it was late in the after-noon because he felt something covering his head, blocking the rain. He looked up and found Luhan holding a red umbrella over his head. "You're going to get sick," Luhan said quietly. Sehun blinked water out of his eyes, and in his daze, he found that Luhan's figure looked so much like Jongin's. Luhan held the handle of the umbrella in one hand and pulled Sehun up with the other hand. Sehun's knees were sore from kneeling in the dirt and he had lost the feeling in his calves after the first hour. "Come on. You can come back another time. Let's go home." 

"Home?" Sehun asked, his voice raspy. 

"Yea, home. Where we live together." 

Together. The words sounded so foreign, yet so familiar. 

"Why do you hurt yourself? Why do you put yourself through so much pain?" Luhan rubbed Sehun's spine comfortingly. "You don't have to live in the past. Life's not going to get better for you if you keep dwelling on those memories," he advised. 

Sehun stopped his silent crying and looked up from his arms. "The memories are all I have. There's no one left for me in this world." Sehun used the back of his hand to wipe his tears away. 

"Hey, what about me? You have me," Luhan said. Luhan rested his hand on the small of Sehun's back and watched as Sehun took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "I'm not going anywhere...yet." Luhan gave Sehun a small smile. "Come on, cheer up. Let's do something fun." 

"It's late," Sehun said. 

"So? Fun doesn't stop after 9, Sehun." Luhan tugged lightly at the hem of Sehun's shirt. "Come on." He stood up and pulled Sehun with him into the living toom. The television was and changed into a movie.

Sehun caught sight of it and immediately changed it. "We are not watching "Spider Man" in this house. Never. Ever." 

Luhan smirked and pulled Sehun down on the plush seat. "Just watch it. It's not that bad."

"Spiders, Luhan, Spiders," Sehun said, his tone flat. 

"They're not going to climb out of the TV," Luhan pointed out. He made sure that Sehun was comfortable before he flicked off the lamp and enveloped the room in darkness. The quiet humming of the TV and the faint English were the only things that were audible. Luhan suddenly felt a weight on the shoulder and he glanced to the side to find Sehun resting his head there. His eyes were closed and there was the sound of small puffs of air. He was probably asleep. Luhan could see the tear tracks on Sehun's face and he let out a small sigh, sadness pooling in his stomach. Luhan flicked the lamp on and turned the TV off. He moved so that Sehun's head laid on his chest instead and he picked Sehun up with ease. For a student in his third year of college, was light and felt like he weighed nothing in Luhan's arms. 

Luhan carried Sehun to his room and set Sehun down on the bed. The blanket was pulled up to cover his body and when Luhan turned to leave, he heard Sehun mumble something in his sleep. 

"Don't go..."

Luhan frowned. "Sehun?" he whispered. 

"Don't leave me. I need you," Sehun said. Sehun's hand began to shake and he gripped the blanket tightly. "You can't leave..." His face was etched with a frown and Luhan wanted nothing more than to erase it. 

Luhan traveled back to the bed in seconds and peeled Sehun's fingers off of the blanket. Tears were gathering in the corner of Sehun's eyes and Luhan wiped them away with his finger. "Hey," he said softly. "Hey, wake up Sehun." Luhan shook Sehun's arm lightly, but Sehun remained asleep. "Sehun."

Sehun's head began to shake. "No. You can't go. You have to stay." 

Luhan felt his heart ache at Sehun's tone. It was laden with pain and frustration, and Luhan knew that the crying fest Sehun had earlier was nothing compared to what he felt every day. Sehun let out a choked sob in his sleep, and Luhan shook Sehun's body harder. "Wake up, Sehun, wake up." Sehun let out a shaky breath and his eyes opened slowly. 

"Luhan?" he asked. He brought his hand up and wiped his eyes.

"You okay?" Luhan mumbled quietly. 

Sehun blinked the remaining tears from his eyes and shook his head. "No." His lower lip trembled at the memory of Jongin leaving him, the red umbrella on the concrete, the splash of water he heard when the truck left. It was all so vivid. 

"Well, try to get some sleep. Wash your face, take a shower if that helps." Luhan gave Sehun a small smile, just a quirk of the lips. He stood up and patted Sehun's hand. "Good night."

Sehun grabbed Luhan's hand and pulled him back. "Stay. Please." 

Luhan cocked his head to the side. "Hmm?" 

"Stay with me. Don't leave." 

Luhan can't help but feel those words weren't meant for him.