Chapter 2
Because Perfection Isn't IdealSometimes, Junmyeon thought the only thing keeping him sane between endless amounts of work and his duty as a soon-to-be husband was the prospect of late night walks—nights filled with laughter and fun. He went each night telling himself it would be the last time, but honestly, it became an addiction that he couldn’t resist. Thinking of Baekhyun helped him work quickly and efficiently, allowed him to greet his future wife without wincing.
It was the night before the week of his wedding. The next morning, they were flying to one of the islands for the marriage ceremony, then to Japan for their honeymoon. He walked towards the door, briefly hugging his fiancée, who’s long since stopped questioning his nightly leaves, assuming that he’s gone to visit his college friends. If only it was that simple.
Last night, last night, last night rushes in Junmyeon’s ears. He’s not stupid or inconsiderate enough to continue this.
“Chanyeol and Chen are at their local gig,” Baekhyun informed him, even though Junmyeon already knew their schedule every Tuesday and Thursday. Baekhyun’s already locked the store, swinging the keys around one finger. He gave Junmyeon and playful grin. “We have the whole night to ourselves.”
Junmyeon returned the smile easily, and laughed as he followed Baekhyun. They rode one of the large float cars together, and then got frozen popsicles afterwards. Later, they sprint across the town square and sit on the steps, gasping for breath.
“You run fast for an old man,” Baekhyun teased lightly, and stuck his tongue out playfully when Junmyeon glared at him.
“Do you want barbeque?”
Baekhyun, surprisingly, shook his head. He tilted his head back and stared into the distance. “That’s a cool building,” he breathed out, pointing to a large, fancy skyscraper. “Isn’t it nice?”
“Yeah,” Junmyeon agreed quietly, because that’s the office building where he worked.
“Have you ever been there?”
Junmyeon stared at Baekhyun, unable to speak past the lump in his throat. He stared at the young, fun-loving kid who worked at a gift shop in the afternoons, who he had somehow fallen in love with. Baekhyun turned, noticing Junmyeon’s silence, and frowned, concerned. “Is there something wrong?”
Junmyeon stared into Baekhyun’s eyes, bottomless brown orbs faintly outlined by smoky black outliner, and suddenly thought, this. He leaned forward and crashed his lips against Baekhyun’s. Months of teasing finally led up to this, and it was all worth it.
Baekhyun reacted quickly, tilting his head slightly as their lips molded together perfectly. Their hands intertwined, locking together tightly. One of Baekhyun’s hands cupped Junmyeon’s cheek. Junmyeon couldn’t bring himself to touch Baekhyun, since an irrational part of his mind believed that Baekhyun would dissolve into dust if he touched Baekhyun’s face. His free hand remained clenched in a tight fist in his lap.
Junmyeon lightly on Baekhyun’s bottom lip, relishing in the taste of cherry popsicle that lingered there. It seemed like they had drowned in their own world, away from their nearby surroundings, until Baekhyun’s tongue darted out to Junmyeon’s lips.
Suddenly, it snapped in Junmyeon’s mind that what he was doing was wrong, wrong, wrong. He pulled away suddenly, yanking his hand away from Baekhyun’s hold.
They sat there in silence again, gasping for breath, this time for an entirely different reason. Junmyeon closed his eyes, trying to gather his thoughts. He wasn’t allowed to feel like this. He shouldn’t feel like this.
“I’m sorry,” Junmyeon said quietly.
Baekhyun turned to face him, and Junmyeon hated the look of surprise written on his face. “Suho…”
Junmyeon hated that name, too—the name he’d blurted out when he’d walked into Baekhyun’s store, the name that he connected some of his happiest and most heart-wrenching memories with. He stood. “I have to go back.”
Baekhyun scrambled to his feet. “Are…” His voice cracked, which surprised Junmyeon because Baekhyun’s voice never cracked, not even when he was hitting ridiculously high notes. “Will you be back tomorrow?”
Junmyeon looked away. He couldn’t lose this game. He’d already crossed the line. The funny thing was, he should have learned from his mistakes in high school, nearly a decade ago, but he’d failed—again. “No.” He hoped that Baekhyun wouldn’t hear the hesitation in his voice.
“No,” Baekhyun gasped, but Junmyeon sidestepped him and started walking towards the subway station. He pretended he didn’t hear the scream of “No!” behind him, or the sound as Baekhyun crumbled to the ground, sobbing brokenly. Maybe, if he tried hard enough, he could convince himself that this was better for all of them.
Author's Note: Thank you for the reads and subs!
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