“So today’s challenge is we’re going to see who can make themselves cry the fastest!” the host of the show says. Leeteuk and Geng instantly exchange looks. So far, Geng has managed to hide all of his stress and tears in public to avoid accidentally pineapple-ing in public.

            “Don’t do it, dude,” Kangin murmurs as Geng is called up first. Heechul bites his lip, but as far as he knows, fake tears won’t make him turn into a pineapple. He’s watched Geng chop up onions—they were basically Spartans who saw no greater honor in life than to die for culinary art—and tear up without so much as sprouting a spike, so he’s not worried. Geng “fails” to cry, and then they call up the other members. Leeteuk, Donghae, Sungmin, and Kibum all manage to cry on cue. Siwon dissolves into the ugliest sobs, which only makes Kyuhyun snicker. Heechul, who prides himself on being good at everything except singing and dancing, manages to cry beautifully until every woman in the audience is dabbing their eyes in sympathy of such a distraught soul.

            And then it’s the second round. Everyone who failed to cry the first round is subjected to a sad segment of a drama. Shindong tries to hold it together, but his bottom lip begins to wobble. Geng manages to be strong and everyone in Super Junior manages to relax ever so slightly.

            But the host is determined to make each and every member of Super Junior cry. Heechul’s just about to poke Geng in the eye himself to make him start tearing up, but just then the host gets Geng at his weakest point. It is the scene from the Pokémon movie when Satoshi dies. And despite his best efforts, Geng cannot hold back to the tears. Heechul tries to step in and intervene, but he’s too late.

            A tale-tell cloud of yellow smoke and all that’s left is a pineapple. No one moves. Finally, Heechul runs up, snatches the pineapple, and runs away, leaving the rest of the band to cover. He trusts their improvisational skills. It’ll be fine.

            He brings Hannie back to one of the dressing rooms and sits in one of the couches, the pineapple cuddled against his chest

            “It’s ok, Hannie,” he murmurs. “You did really well. And they’ll find a way to spin it. They always do.” Then he cackles. “How old are you? Pokemon? Really? You’re not even good at the game. The only person you’re beating is Siwon, and that’s because he actually pays attention at church instead of playing unlike everyone else who goes with him.” He stretches out on the couch, the pineapple balanced on his stomach. “But didn’t I cry so well? Did you see me? I can cry without getting all red and puffy. Maybe that’s my real super power. I don’t think normal humans can be as beautiful as me. What do you think?” He waits for Geng’s reply, then scowls. “Don’t act so smart with me. You’re a fruit right now.” He sighs. “I wish I could turn into a fruit. Then I could get out of dance practice.” He frowns again. “I dance sometimes! I’m not good at it, ok. I know that. Just…just shut up about it.” He crosses his arms and in another puff of smoke the pineapple disappears and is replaced by Geng.

            “Awww, is someone feeling insecure?” Geng coos. Heechul doesn’t reply, but he allows Geng to pull him into his arms. “It’s ok. I still love you.”

            “You are disgustingly sappy,” Heechul replies. “It’s off putting.” But he doesn’t complain when Geng kisses him on the nose and thanks him for rescuing him. Heechul chooses not to mention that really, Geng should be thanking Leeteuk, who is no doubt scrambling to explain why exactly the leader of the Chinese subunit is a part time tropical fruit.