Another short, broken xiuhun. this is inspired by one of my favourite scenes in a movie, helloooo to you if you get what movie i’m talking about.

Minseok feels a little weird to see all of his friends again. Weird. Everyone gathered around the table are Sehun’s friends too, Sehun’s friends first. And now, Sehun is the one who’s not here. It feels different, it feels wrong.

Sehun’s absence is screaming at him.

Minseok hates to think he accidentally took parts of Sehun when he left, that this – the constancy of friends, these friends, in Sehun’s life - he took this from Sehun too. Sehun’s friends supported the breakup, told Sehun to let Minseok go, encouraged Sehun to move on.

Sehun’s friends took Minseok’s side.

That’s why Jongin looks worried, sounds apologetic when he whispers: “Hyung, Sehun is here.”

Junmyeon too. “Sorry,” he says, face so sincere. “He said he can’t come.” Then he tentatively points his thumb to the front of the restaurant, “I could—do you want me to-”

“No. It’s fine,” Minseok hastily says. The idea of kicking Sehun out for Minseok’s sake, it---it just unsettles his stomach. God, it feels so wrong.

Beside Minseok, Yixing looks at him with kind, encouraging eyes, encouraging smile. Because Yixing knows. Even if he’s the only one here who’s new to the pack, even if he doesn’t know Sehun - Yixing knows, Yixings’s seen--is still seeing Minseok rebuilding his life, the life without Sehun.

Minseok smiles back at Yixing, at least he tries to, until he hears him.

“Guys,” he greets, “I’m sorry I’m late. Congrats Joonie hyung or should I say Attorney Kim now?” Sehun. His voice is slurred and careless. Drunk.

Minseok doesn’t look up from the table, feeling the wary glances of his friends on him, on Sehun. Back and forth, as subtle as they can. Sehun is still speaking, babbling mainly to Junmyeon - teasing him about passing the bar exam.

And the worst part of it is how well Minseok knows Sehun, how he can tell, just from his voice. Sehun is miserable.

“Oh,” Sehun stops babbling, Minseok shivers. Sehun continues on a more guarded voice. “H—Hyung?”

Minseok’s heart breaks for him all over again.

Minseok looks up then, after all these months, comes face to face with Sehun. His Sehun. The person he spent the last five years of his life with; the person he built his life with, built his life around to; the one who was there when he shifted from his course in business administration to architecture; the one who encouraged him that he can, that he should. The one who he sketched a dream house with, the house that began simple and cosy and home in Minseok’s mind but Sehun is all “hyung let’s put a soccer field on the backyard,” and Minseok laughed, just thinking of the wide acre of land that would need, so farfetched but, “hyung you love it, admit it you love the idea of it, come on“, “but then our backyard will be twenty times wider than our house”, “so let’s make our house bigger,” Minseok snorted, but God it was so easy then, to say roll his eyes and say “okay,” let Sehun kiss him and drape himself over him, absorb his giddy over-eager energy, as Minseok pour over his drawing board.

And then, and then, eventually, Sehun is no longer the one he created a dream house with, he’s the one who Minseok created a dream house for. And it didn’t feel right anymore. Minseok was exhausted. Unhappy. It was there, the point it all began crashing down, brick by brick, down to the ground.

Minseok can’t stand looking at him.

Sehun’s eyes are wide, wild. Broken—he looks just as broken as when Minseok last saw him, if not worse.

“You’re...here” Sehun’s voice floats - surprised, disbelieving, hopeful. Minseok feels the others wince at that, everyone on the table has stopped eating, has stopped everything.

“Sehun,” Minseok responds, as a way of greeting. Voice firm so it will not shake and betray him.

Sehun makes a move forward as if to look at Minseok closer, confirm it’s really him, he’s really here. But he stops when he spots Yixing.

There’s a second of bated stillness.

Then, Junmyeon takes over the introduction. Yixing is his friend from uni and also Minseok’s new co-worker.

Yixing stands from the table and Sehun actually steps back – away from Yixing’s outstretched hand.

Jongin and Chanyeol ushers Sehun to sit beside them. To break the tension of the ignored handshake. Their Sehun don’t do anything stupid, is subdued and communicated through squeezes on Sehun’s shoulder.

It’s like walking on ice.

Painstaking, to carry on with their casual conversations, to pretend everything is fine, to pretend they can’t see Sehun staring at Minseok, at Yixing.

Sehun’s knife clatters noisily against his plate. Everyone snaps out of their act, silent uh oh here we go exchanged through glances and sighs. Sehun points rudely at Yixing before turning to Minseok, “That one your boyfriend already?” he asks, his voice accusing, hateful, disgusted.

Minseok doesn’t answer, shakes his head at his friends, stops them from defending him.

“You know—“ Sehun continues, faux calm. “You could have saved me from all your finding yourself speech when it’s really finding yourself a new boyfriend. You want to find yourself my . I prefer brutal honesty than gargantuan bull.”

“Dude, we really are just friends-“ Yixing reasons.

“Shut up! I wasn’t talking to you,” Sehun snaps.

“Sehun,” Minseok warns and Sehun cuts him.

“Congrats Hyung,” he spats. “Just ing. Congratulations!” he yells dramatically inside the restaurant, pushing up to his feet and gesturing broadly. “Congrats! For having no respect. Have you heard of the 3month rule? I still have two days! Two ing days! You can’t wait? Two. Days! Can’t at least give me that, can you? Were you itching so bad to replace me?!”

Yixing tries speaking again, he stands, “Look Sehun,“ and Minseok sees it coming – Sehun falling forward and landing a sickening straight punch on Yixing’s face.

Yixing falls straight to the floor. Everyone is on their feet, while Minseok sinks to his knees to check on Yixing. His mouth is bleeding. “!” Minseok swears at no one and everyone. It’s ridiculously cruel. How things boiled to this. When Minseok wanted the break-up to end in a drifting apart. Not like this. Not an explosion on each other’s faces. Not him wanting to hurt Sehun.

Kyungsoo helps, presses a handkerchief on Yixing’s mouth while Minseok stands, the restaurant security coming over to check on them. Everyone’s looking, everyone in the restaurant. It’s madness. Minseok just wants this scene to disappear, the burn inside him to disappear.

Then:

“I still love you hyung,” Sehun mutters, looking at Miseok across the table, begging. Jongin and Chanyeol on either side of him, calming him, telling him to stop, don’t do this come on Sehun, please stop.

Sehun shakes his head, eyes not leaving Minseok. “Please?” he cries, his face crumpling slowly, fire to ashes. “I can’t stop--I love you--I can’t. Please? Please.” He crumbles, right there.

Too many times, Minseok let pleas destruct him. Too many times, he let Sehun in – too many times until he simply doesn’t have space for himself anymore.

One.

He just needs one word. Just one.

“No,” he manages.

And once he said it, he can’t stop.

“No. No no no no no no no,” he shakes his head fast, saying no to a lot of things, making up for all the times he should have said it. “I don’t. I don’t love you anymore,” he tells him, for the first time, his heart hammering painfully against his ribcage. But his words firm, his words beating Sehun to pulp, his words beating their relationship to an end, finally, officially, in front of everyone else.

And Sehun, he folds in on himself, doesn’t fight it anymore.

Fire put out by water. It’s over.

Minseok catches the last glimpse of Sehun wiping his tears before Sehun allows himself to be walked out, away. Minseok watches him go.

Maybe Sehun is taking parts of Minseok as he walk away, maybe some parts of Sehun is being left here with Minseok as Minseok stays. But being together, will not make them complete.

Minseok knows that now.

Blank spaces. It haunted Minseok for a long time. Blank floor plans waiting for him to be filled, empty stretches of land shown to him by expectant clients. But this, the emptiness he feels now, it’s reassuring. There’s a place for something else, something new.

Minseok knows that now.