Everyone lives a normal life and lives it to their fulliest until they hear that they're dying. Thats me.

Names Sulli and I was living a typical life until bam one day, I start having bleeding crazy and I couldn't stop going to the toilet and having diarrhea. My mom took me to the hospital and she was crying like crazy. I kept telling her everything was going to be fine even though I know I wasn't going to be fine.

Few hours later, the doctor has woken me up with some news. And yet, my mother was still crying her eyes out.

"What's going on mom?" I asked. She looked at me like she was speechless. I turned my eyes to the doctor and he gave me a concerned look.

"Sulli dear, theres something you should know." The doctor placed her warm hand on my right shoulder.

"What is it?" I looked at her with troubled eyes.

"You're at stage 2 of colon cancer sweetheart.."

All I heard was cancer repeating over and over again inside my head. Next thing I knew, tears came out my eyes. I was living a perfect life, my family beside me and Jongin, my bestfriend, was there for me too. Nothing in my life was going wrong until today. I didn't know how I was suppose to react. 

I'm dying.

And thats all I had to know. 

I grabbed my phone and tried calling Jongin. Jongin has been my best friend since I was little and little did he know I have been crushing on him ever since. He's been going out with other girls while I was there always supporting him. But when it came to something important, he would ditch his girlfriend and go to me. But this time, I called him million of times and texted him over and over again and no answer. I eventually gave up and took a rest as I felt myself hurting.

The next morning, I was still not able to go out yet as they were still analyzing my sickness, if it were possible for me to live. I looked out the window and thought about my life. I wasn't scared to die but theres still a lot of things I haven't done. Im still young. I sighed and grabbed my phone, forgetting that Kai still has not answered me.

I tried calling him again and this time, he picked up but strangely it was a girls voice who answered.

"Hello?" she answered in a cute way. I could tell Kai obviously found a new girl.

I snorted and replied,"Where's Kai?"

"He's sleeping, want me to tell him you called after he wakes up?"

"No, I want you to wake him up now. Its important."

"Well his sleeping is too." She gave me attitude.

"Well excuse you, Im his bestfriend and who do you think you are to say that to me?" I was pissed, who did this girl think she was. More important than me? I don't think so.

"I'm his soon-to-be wife. He proposed yesterday for your information." P-propose-ed?!

"Alright, well just tell him later then." I hung up as I dropped my phone quickly. My heart could not handle what was going on, on what I just heard. I shook my head and covered my face. This could not be happening to me.

It has not even been 24 hours and yet I have the most horrible news come up. What have I done in the world to deserve this?!

Its late in the afternoon when Kai finally decides to show up at the hospital. He ran into my room and hurridly to my bed with a worried look on his face.

"Best friend, I am so sorry I haven't been answering. I shouldve been here since you got here and what happened? Tell me everything," Kai apollegitaclly said.

"No worries Kai, I'm fine. Its okay, you were doing something with her and its totally fine," I lied. I was still upset and I didn't want to tell him about my cancer because it might change things and he was happy with Krystal.

"You sure?" he asked. I nodded and fake smiled. He hugged me tightly and I groaned as it hurt me a bit. He let go of the hug. "Sulli, whats wrong?"

"Nothing, I just got a bruise there and you hugged me and it hurt.." I nodded slowly.

"Alright, well lets go out and I'll repay you for not being here," he smiled.

"She can't leave the hospital just yet because she has--" my mom interrupted our conversation and started babbling until I stopped her before she could say anything about my sickness.

"Because I fractured my leg-" I bit my lip, hoping he'd believe me.

"Oh is that right? Let me see-" he suggested.

"NO- I mean, no. I don't like people seeing it." I covered my leg with my blanket.

My mom backed me up and said, "Kai you should get going now, Sulli has an appointment soon." He nodded in response and waved goodbye. After he left, my mom came close to me and patted my back.

"Honey whats going on? You usually tell Kai everything, aren't you guys best friends? Why didn't you tell him?" my mom asked.

"Because.." I started tearing up, "he's getting married mom. If I tell him, he might say no to the wedding for me and I don't want that. I want him happy mom. I don't want to be in the way again. Remember prom? I had a huge incident and he ditched his prom date and went to the hospital? Mom I don't want that to happen again. No matter how much I love him, I must let go..."

I wiped my tears but it didn't help, I cried all day.

I didn't know if I wanted to live anymore to be honest.

a/n: pretty short chapter eu e but its just the basics for now. more angst will happen the next chapter so get ready~ heh. hope you liked this story for now, comment below, subscribe or upvote! thank you!