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A good in goodbye.Nana
"This is the bed room ,the one in the left is the bath room , and if you want something there is a mini refrigerator here .Make yourself comfortable here , nana." chanyeol said when we already reached his house , his sister family are out in a trip chanyeol said thats why i could say yes .
My eyes are heavy probably because all the crying i did in the carnival , i can feel sweat everywhere on my body but i do not want to do anything not even take a bath . I don't know it must be because of all the confusion in my mind .
Still every things soojung said in the call are blurry for me . Yes , that was taeyeon's DNA , but then why it was there ?although maybe taeyeon were best friend with Baekhyun and yeri but it still doesn't make sense how could ms taeyeon put her stuff behind the cupboard . If she wants baekhyun to know that , that she was pregnant but why bother put that there ?
"Chanyeol , what do you do if--- you did something bad ? I mean like really really bad and you did that bad things because of me . Would you tell me ?" i asked him
He looks a little confused at first because i suddenly ask him that question. But hen he laughs "As your best friend i would just tell you directly , like why not Yeah its bad but its not like you would leave me because of that bad things right . Unless-"
"Unless what ?"
"Unless when we are in a relationship , you know although we done some mistakes and the reason is our partner we can't just simply said it because we know that our relationship and partner will be affected because of this ."
"Why ? Is it something related to baekhyun and you ? " Finally chanyeol asked it and finally i have the confidence to answer it . "When i packed his things back then in his home i found a pregnancy test and actually years passed by and finally krystal found the dan of that pregnancy test and it is ms taeyeon's . She is a patient's mother and then yesterday she fainted and baekhyun did nothing --"
"He only stand and it is unlike baekhyun at all , even all nurses were talking about that . "
"Then krystal called me and it is getting more clear , because first i have proof that they knew each other . But why did she hide it fro baekhyun ? Thats my question and--"
"Now i have the answers from you , it makes everything clear and i am happy i know the truth . I am--"
"You sure you happy ?"CHanyeol asked me , part of me wants to say yes parts of me just want to stay silent . I know , what chanyeol thinking about , that baekhyun is cheating on me although parts of me thinking the same . I know , baekhyun would not lie to me , despite all his bad attitudes lying is not one of them .
"I am happy because at least i know things and finally my question for years is answered. But i just want to let you know that it has nothing to do with my relationship."
"It is not like i am happy finally i know that baekhyun cheat on me and i am finally cancelling my marriage . I am of course sad and confused of what happens next , will i tell him or will we be okay ? I am still questioning myself."
"Then ask him , you need to do that .Of course it would hurt you -- but if your relationship are strong .And you love each other of course you will still marry him."
"But you even said that you want to cancel your marriage , nana i know you might speak that without thinking of anything .But i know deep down there your heart were asking you to leave him. Just admit it ."
I can just lie to him that i disagree .But , what chanyeol said to me is true , my heart were asking my ability to accept the truth and stay with it . Although baekhyun might be the man i always dreamt of , but i know i would not stand any single lie of him And extremely when he lied about his child , i would not stand that.
"My heart of course yes , but i do not live in this only with my heart . Like i have my mind here in my brain . Logic is more important than feelings " i lied , nana is lying to chanyeol for what nana ? for what ?
For making yourself like you choose the right thing in front of chanyeol ? You hopeless nana.
Chanyeol walks closer on me , closer then closer on me .WHile i am sitting on bed , chanyeol move his head closer to mine , it is only about 3 fingers , this might looks cheesy like a drama but my heart is beating so fast right now.
"You think you can lie to me , but you can't ."
And suddenly i could feel all the heat come running in my cheek , inhale exhale nana what are you doing with yourself . Control please control !
"See ? your cheeks getting red." chanyeol points out the change of my cheeks because of him . If i was stronger to resist his teased , he wouldn't notice my lies.
I push chanyeol aside , "You don't say ." He laughs at my words putting his long legs on the bed , "Ah i miss this time . Don't you ?" chanyeol asked , I am thinking about all the memories with chanyeol .Sometimes it was nice when we spent all afternoon walking trough the han river , or serious when we were studying and all chanyeol did just sketch drawing on his book.
"I don't remember me in a bedroom with you though , but yeah some memories were too good to be forgotten." i answered , "Highschool felt so good ."chanyeol said while putting his head on the bed .I think thats true , although for some people high school is kind of scary place . But for me ? Highschool was mediocre ..nothing special about it.Unless there was chanyeol and my life was a little bit better then.
"Tell me things i missed when i was in america." chanyeol said , i am following him , put my head on the bed. "Hmm , i guess there wasn't anything special . I went to a medical school , study hard , met baekhyun , date baekhyun , just sort of things ." i answered , he is now moving hi body to the left side , right beside me.
"Baekhyun was nice , sometimes he could be serious but most of the time he jokes so easily and we had a great time together." i said honestly , This time i pot my head on the left right in front of chanyeol. "So now tell me about states !" i said . "I was sick most of the time , but then i learnt drawing from the masters , held my first exhibition , nothing was really important . Unlike you i don't really have a lover , girls come and go but no one really stay with me ." he answered.
"Not even one ?"
"Not even one."
"You trash , you need to have at least one ! Didn't you feel really lonely ?"
"Not really , i have lots of friends in states and we sometimes drink or talking things .But really-- although i have no lover , my heart doesn't feel really lonely."
"I think we have the same thoughts though , before i met baekhyun lots of boys ask me on a date and friend keeps setting me on a blind date . But i didn't go on any single date , because i was just happy being on myself and didn't really need any partner ."
"Because yeah , my heart didn't feel really lonely that time ."
"Really ?"
"Yes. And of course it was before i met baekhyun . After that baekhyun helped me growing i guess ."
"Nana can i ask you something ?" he looks way more serious than before , i am only nodding on him .
"Do you still love me ?"
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