I glanced at the clock. It was ten am. I should wake her up now, or else she will be late. I put down the carrot and the knife. I walked toward our room. The sun was lighting the room through the closed curtains. She was sleeping here in our bed. I had no idea that someone could be that cute while sleeping. I sat on the bed and poked her arm. She mumbled a bit but still refused to get up. I sighed. She was quite childish sometimes. I stood up and took away the blanket.

She grumbled loudly and sat up on the bed. Her hair was really messy and I could distinguish some drool on the corner of . I held my chuckle. She was definitely cute. I walked toward her and kissed her forehead. She pulled my arm and dragged me on the bed. I sighed again and struggled but she was hugging me too tight. She was laughing while looking at how I was struggling. I couldn't help but laughing too. I pecked her lips and told her to get prepared and reminded her that she could wake Haneul up today.

I pecked her lips once more and walked out of the bedroom. I opened Haneul's room. He was still sleeping. I sweetly smiled at him. She was a bit busy with the restaurant so she couldn't wake haneul up too often. I know that she loves to wake him but because it this moment is special. Well, that's what she says. His room was an old empty room that she never really used. I slowly closed the door and went back to the kitchen. Before continuing on preparing  the carrots for the lunch, I squatted down and caressed Lucky. He was a really good dog. Especially with Haneul. I don't understand people that say that pitbull are dangerous. Lucky has never tried even once to bite one of us.

I stood up and grabbed the knife and the carrot and peeled it again. A few seconds after, I felt some arms being wrapped around my waist. I smiled. I love when she hugs me like that. She pecked my neck and rested her chin on my shoulder to see what I was doing. After checking, she pecked my cheeks and went to sit at the table with Haneul. I served them their breakfast. Both of them complained about the fact that there weren't much to eat. I replied that they should have woken up earlier if they wanted to eat more. The two of them pouted and ate.

After having finished, she stood up and got prepared. She was taking Lucky today. I nodded and walked her toward the door. I waved at her as she left the apartment. I was about to walk back to the kitchen when I heard her coming back. I looked at her a bit confused.

-"Did you forget something Taeyeon?"

She hugged my waist and pulled me closer before kissing my lips softy. I was a bit shocked at first but then I replied her kiss.

-"I just forgot to do that" She said.

She was walking out again before stopping and looking at me.

-"Oh and Tiffany, will you come to the restaurant this afternoon?"

I nodded and smiled. She smiled at me back and closed the door behind her. I couldn't help but smiling. I loved mornings like that. I was just feeling so happy. It's an indescribable. I was just feeling at peace, and happy and complete. Yeah I felt as if my life was complete. As if I reached the of happiness my life could bring to me. I hope that it'll never end. This feeling, I want to treasure it as long as I can.

I sat in front of Haneul and looked at him.  My most important person in my life. He noticed me staring at me and asked me if something was wrong. I shook my head and told him that everything was okay. Since he had finished his breakfast, he asked me if he could go. I agreed and he ran in his room to dress up. I chuckled at his reaction. Somehow, he was really like Taeyeon, even though they aren't related by blood.

Now that I think of it, all of this, all of this happiness, might have never existed. I must say that my relationship with Taeyeon wasn't always that good.  And if I was less stupid, we may never have suffered as much as we did. But what's done is done. How was I supposed to tell her everything back then? I couldn't. I was afraid about her reaction, that's why I ran away, I guess.

-Flash back-

-"Taeyeon.. I am sorry.."

I couldn't help but looking down. She was remaining silent. I hurt her, didn't I? Of course I did. I never thought that she would actually confess to me. Just when I have to go. Isn't it unfair? Why couldn't she confess earlier? Well, even if she did, I couldn't accept her feelings. It hurts. it hurts so badly.

I suddenly heard her laughing. I looked up at her, a bit confused. She bowed at me while apologizing. No. No please...Taeyeon.. stop it. Don't laugh with making that kind of face. I took a deep breath. Looking at her forcing herself to laugh while she was about to cry was an awful view. I wanted to kill myself for having hurt her like this. But I don't have the choice... I beg you, understand me. Forgive me for making you feel like that. She bowed to me a last time and walked away from my apartment.

I couldn't take my eyes off of her back walking away. Why can't I catch her? I want to grab her hand and tell her the truth. Bu I can't.... I can't.. Why? Why can't I be with the one I love? It was too much for my legs and I fell on the ground. Without realizing it, my tears were already flooding my cheeks. I tried to wipe them away but they kept on dropping.

I heard someone stepping in. My sight was blurred by the tears. I only recognized him by his voice. It was Nickhun. I tried to stand up but failed. He helped me standing up and made me sit on the sofa. My tears were unstoppable. I knew that I lost her. I lost her forever. Nickhun gently caressed my hair.

-"It's about Taeyeon? I saw her just now. What happened? She confessed but you rejected her? I am right, am I not?"

His words stabbed me even more. Of course he didn't mean to hurt me more but it couldn't be helped. I opened my mouth to talk but no words came out of it, only crying sobs. I breathed deeply and cried

-"It hurts so bad"

Nickhun hugged me tight and kept on caressing my hair. I hid my face in his chest and cried as much as I could. Crying wouldn't take the pain away but it was good. After a while, I finally calmed down and pushed him a bit. I wiped my cheeks and took deep breathes. I was tired... I didn't know that crying was that much tiring. I turned myself toward Nickhun and smiled to thank him. He smiled at me back. He somehow had changed. He wasn't the same Nickhun as I knew. A more gentle one, I would say.

-"Anyway, how did you know about my feelings for Taeyeon?" I asked

He chuckled a bit

-"It was obvious. I knew about Taeyeon's feelings first. It's easy to see through that girl. You know, when I came to take you when you were staying at her house, I never saw someone with that kind of look. It was like she was about to give a part of her life up. And still, she smiled at me. Such a strong girl.. As for you, you weren't the same as before. You were even avoiding my hugs. Your face lightened up only when we were talking about Taeyeon or when you were seeing her. I guess that that made me angry. I still had feelings for you, you know. So knowing that you weren't mine anymore.. Yeah, it took me some time to admit it and I did things I now regret. Anyway, I already gave up and wanted to support you. When I saw her in the steps, I thought that she was confused because you had confessed to her. But after seeing you the way you were,  I understood I was wrong. It's not too late you know, you still have a choice."

I was quite amazed by what he was telling me. She had loved me for so long. And all I did was hurting her again and again. I sighed at his last words.

-"I don't have any choice and you know it. Even if I stayed here, would she still accept me? I know that she loved me, but I doubt that boss will let me go. That will just bring her more pain to her. I don't want that. I am fed up you know. I am fed up with hurting her. I am tired of seeing her tears. I can't be with her. I just can't. If I go out with her, I'll end up hurting her again. I know that... I am sure about that"

I felt tears coming again. I tried my best to hold them but some still slid on my cheeks. I won't forgive myself If I ever hurt her. I can't do that anymore. For her sake, for my sake... I messed my hair. The plane was tomorrow morning. When I will be sitting on the plane's sit, there won't be any turn back. I wouldn't be able to meet her anymore. But that's the choice I made.

Nickhun cheerfully smiled at me before kissing my head. He told me that he would pick me up to take me to the airport. I nodded and smiled at him. I was great to have a friend like him. I didn't know who had changed him, but I thanked that person with all my heart. After he left, I felt a bit dizzy. I cried too much, I guess. I slowly stood up and walked toward my bedroom. I didn't take the time to undress myself and laid on my bed. That night, it didn't take me long to fall asleep.

I heard my alarm clock ringing. I winced a bit and turned it off. I had an awful night. I only slept two or three hours. I sat up on the bed. Today is the day... I walked toward the bathroom. I glanced at the glass. I looked awful. I sighed. I cried again in the night. I hated that part of me who was so weak. I slowly undressed myself and looked at my tummy. The baby must have been hurt yesterday too right? I caressed it. Sorry...

I entered in the bathtub and the water on. I jumped a bit as the ice water fell on my shoulder. I didn't want to take a warm shower. I wanted to be perfectly woken up. I quickly soaped myself and rinsed before getting out of the bathtub. Something surprised me. I wasn't shivering at all. It was like I couldn't feel the cold. I slowly dried myself and got dressed. I glanced at my watch. Nickhun would be there in twenty minutes. I couldn't take the plane with that kind of face. Fortunately, make up had been invented.

Make up was really magic. Now, no one will ever imagine how tired I am. I looked like a fresh and rested girl. After a last check, I got out of the bathroom and walked toward the living room. I knew that I should eat something but I wasn't hungry at all. Even though my tummy was empty, I felt as if it was full. I sighed a bit. That wouldn't be a big deal. I gathered my belongings and waited for Nickhun.

After a few minutes, someone knocked on my door. I took my luggage and walked toward the door. When he first saw me, he looked a bit surprised. Maybe because he expected to see me more tired. He sighed as he noticed that I had put on some make up. I ignored his sight and walked out of the apartment. I am going to miss this place. I had so much memory in it... Even if the last one is a painful one..

As i felt tears coming up, I shook my head and stepped toward his car. He opened the door for me. I sat and put the security belt. The way toward the airport passed in an heavy silent. Nickhun obviously wanted to convince me to stay here. But I couldn't. I just couldn't. Anyway, even if I changed my mind now. What could I do? I would go to Taeyeon and apologize? I doubt that she will forgive me.

After a while, we finally arrived to the airport. I got out of the car. My friend helped me to carry my luggage toward the register service. Once we were done, we sat on a bench, waiting for my flight. I glanced at my watch. It was seven pm. My flight was in a hour. I sighed. I didn't want to go...

Time passed awfully quickly and I was called like the other passages to get on the plane. I looked around quickly. I laughed at my reaction. As if she was coming to say a last goodbye... I hugged Nickhun tight and thanked him once more for all he had done, although I was mad at him for a few things. He ruffled my air and I walked away toward the plane.

My seat was the 74A. As I was looking for it, I realized that almost all of the passages were American. That was quite normal, I would say. I finally found my place, it was the one next to the porthole. I sat and looked through it. Everything seemed to be gray. I rested my head against the back of the seat and closed my eyes. I felt someone sitting next to me. I opened my eyes to see with who I was going to travel.

It was a young white man. About twenty years old or something like that. Our eyes met. I smiled and bowed to him while greeting him before focusing on the porthole again. He seemed to be a kind boy. After a few minutes that sounded like hours, the plane finally flew off. It was my first time taking a plane for that long. I had already travelled to Japan and China but never in the USA.

During the journey, I tried my best not to think about her. I knew that I would burst out in tears if I would think about her. I put my earphones on and listened to music. I just to forget everything that happened. But it was too late for that. My mind and my heart were already full of her. It would take such a long time to forget about her. Anyway, do I really want to forget her? I wonder...

I felt someone shaking my hand. I slowly opened my eyes. It was a Stewart saying that we were arrived to the New York. I smiled at him and apologized for having fell asleep. I quickly stood up and got out of the plane. When I stepped into the airport, I was stricken by the crowd. This airport was way bigger than the Seoul's one. I looked around a bit confused.

I heard someone saying my name. I turned around and saw a handsome man. I bowed to him. He told me that he was sent by my new boss to pick me up. I bowed again and thanked him. With his help, I was able to catch my luggage. We both walked out of the airport were a huge limousine was waiting for us. I was a bit ill-at-ease. I wasn't used to things like this. Moreover, everyone was staring at us. I got in the limousine, followed by him.

He kept on asking me questions about the Korean's way of life. He thought that Korean were still under the Japanese power. I calmly told him that now Korea was fully independent. When he asked me if we knew what was a computer, I thought that I was going to punch him. I hate people who think that their country is the best and the other countries know nothing. But I kept on smiling and patiently answered every questions.

The limousine eventually stopped and I got out of the car. We were in front of a huge building. Wow... It was nothing like the one I used to work in. The man laughed a bit at my reaction. I followed him in. On the way to the boss' office, I met a lot of handsome men and beautiful women. Were they all hosts? We climbed some steps. I winced a bit. My legs hurt.. I had to take off my plaster earlier than I should. Boss wanted me to go back to work soon. Now they sometimes hurt me much.

We climbed the stairs until the last floor. I thought I would faint. My legs were hurting me so much.. But I acted like nothing. I couldn't say that I was hurt. They wouldn't accept me if I did so. The man that was accompanying me knocked on the door. We waiting a few seconds and he pushed  the door after having heard a "Come in". I walked in and bowed to the Boss.

He was sitting on his chair, his leg on his desk, newspaper in his hands. He was a bit fat and bald. I discreetly covered my nose with my hand. It stinks. The new Boss stared at me from head to toes. He nodded of satisfaction and told me to get prepared because I was starting this night. I widen my eyes a bit. This night? But It's already seven pm and I just arrived. I took a deep breath and bowed while smiling and thanking him.

The man led me to a room on the fourth floor. He explained that the rookies were living inside the building until they rank raised. I nodded and entered in the room. It was a small room composed of a bed and a little bathroom. He told me that there was a kind of canteen on the third floor and that the work place was situated on the sixth floor. I thanked him with a last bow and he walked away. I laid on the bed. My legs hurt... I sat up and massaged them a bit. Once the pain flew away a bit, I stood up and searched in my luggage a dress.

Once I found one that I liked, I put it one. I walked in the bathroom to see if I had to change my makeup.  It was pretty good. I glanced at the watch. It was now eight pm. I didn't know when it was starting. I forgot to ask. I heard someone knocking on the door. When I opened it, I found a really beautiful girl. She smiled at me and introduced herself. She was the number 5. She told me to follow her.

I obeyed and we walked in the stairs. She explained that it was forbidden to call people by their name here. It was just a number. I was given the number eleven. There were 100 numbers. The girls with the lowest rank were taking care of the poorest customers and the ones with the highest rank were taking care of the wealthiest.  The Top ten girls had to train the rookies, like me. Well, I wasn't really a rookie so she was just going to show me the place around.

For an hour, she took me to every places of the building. She showed me the forbidden places, and the most calm ones. She also introduced me to the top ten girls. I was a bit surprised. I expected these girls to be kind of snob and mean. But they were really kind. I didn't feel and competition between them. That changed me from my old place where everyone wanted to be the first.

Number seven told me that relationship was forbidden but having was allowed. I was a bit confused by this rule. She explained that we couldn't date any boys or girls but if we were in love, the only thing we could do is having . We couldn't live with together, going to cinema, kissing and so on. That was quite weird.. They told me that the work was starting at half past nine pm. I stayed with the top ten until we were called to work.

I immediately got close with number three. She was really easy going and funny. We talked about the weirdest customers we ever had. It doesn't sound like that, but our job is pretty dangerous. Some of our customers could get obsessed with us and hurt us. Each of us know a host girl that was hurt once by a customer. Hopefully, it had never happened to me.

I heard a low voice telling us to get ready. The host girls were separated in ten rooms. For each room ten girls. I walked toward my room. It was really a huge one... The ten girl of this room were standing and the customers were choosing one of us. I had luck that day and was chosen by the less weird one. He was about forty, forty-five. I sat next to him and greet him. He gently smiled at me and we started to talk. He told me that it was his first time going here. He just got dumped by his wife and he felt really sad. I bit my lips. I shouldn't think about her. No, no, no.. I bit my lips harder. Those tears were annoying...

After a while, he asked me why I moved here. I lied to him and said that it was because I followed my brother. He nodded. How could I tell him that the reason why I moved here was simply that I was sold? We are only goods. The host clubs are a huge industry all linked together. This customer didn't stay too long. He got away before midnight.

I had a new customer. He was younger than the one. This one just wanted to have fun so I made him buy a lot of champagne. I guess that I shouldn't have. He got soon drunk and started to look at me lustfully. I kept on smiling at him while pushing him a bit when he was going too far. He seemed to calmed down a bit but he didn't take off his hands from my tight. I took a deep breath. Bear with it.. just bear with it. If I reject him too much, he will be mad and I will lost some money.

He moved his hands higher and higher on my tight. I felt uneasy. I didn't know how to react. I glanced at a security guard. He understood the situation and went to take the man out of the room. I sighed in relief. I hid my hands under the table not to let the other notice that I was shaking. I was really afraid of that type of customers. The customer is always right. That's the rule. Since there was still sometimes before the end, I had new customers. This time, they were two boys. They seemed to be successful young business man.

They just wanted to kill some times and have fun. This type of customers are the best. They respect us and we have a lot of funs with them. After two hours, the club finally closed. I yawned. I was so tired. I stood up and walked in the corridors. I had a lot of fun tonight... Yeah a lot of fun.. I was trying to convince myself. But everything looked boring. I missed her... I missed her so much..

On the way to my room, I met the top ten. They asked me if I wanted to come with them to eat. I smiled at them and rejected their offer. I just wanted to go to sleep right now. I didn't want to tell them that I was simply not hungry. After a long walk through the stairs and the corridor, I finally arrived to my room. I closed the door and undressed myself. I went in the bathroom. I brushed my hair slowly. What is she doing now? Is she thinking about me? I shook my head. Don't think about her ! I put away the brush away and went in the bathtub.

I the warm water and let it running on my shoulders. Slowly, my muscled relaxed. It had been quite a while since I felt at peace like this. I stayed a few minutes under the water. I quickly soaped myself. The soap smelled good. My heart missed a beat. It was the same soap as the one Taeyeon uses. I rinsed myself and quickly dried. Why..Why everything remind me of her? I dressed up and stepped toward my bed. I glanced at the clock. It was five am. I laid on the bed and closed my eyes.

The unceasing knocks on the door woke me up. I sat up on the bed. I dreamt about her. It wasn't a painful dream. I felt at peace. It was quite strange. I massaged my temple. I had and headache. The knocks wouldn't stop. I stood up and was about to open the door when I felt dizzy. I ran in the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. I caressed my tummy. You didn't really like yesterday night did you? Sorry, I have no choice.. Bear it a bit.

I finally opened the door. It was number eight. She was panic-stricken and told me that the Boss wanted to see me. When we were called out in the Boss' office, that never sounded good. I froze. Did he discover I was pregnant? What should I do? I can't afford to lose this job ! I quickly wore some choose and climbed the stairs toward the Boss' office. The top ten was in front of it. They all have a worried look on their face. I smiled to them to reassure them but I was scared to death.

I knocked on the door. I heard a "come in" and entered. I closed the door behind me and bowed to the Boss. He was sitting at his desk but he looked a bit angry. When his eyes raised on me, I lowered mine. He sighed and told me that he was proud of me. I did a pretty good job and could become number one. Anyway, the fact that I was pregnant was a really bad thing.

I thought that my heart was going to stop. He knows about it... What should I do? What should I do? Panic started to take control of my body. I was lost and hardly breathed. My legs and hands were shaking. I felt his gaze on me. It made me feel more panicky. I didn't want to do this. But I didn't have the choice. I went down on my knees and kneeled before him while begging him to let me stay here because I had nowhere else to go.

I heard him laughing a bit. He stood up and stepping toward me. I kept on looking down. He squatted before me and lifted my chin up. I clenched my teeth. He stinks. Sweat was running down his forehead. Gross.. I couldn't move. I didn't know what he was going to do.

-"It's not good to lie to me you know... Anyway, it's not really your fault. It's your previous Boss' fault for having sold me a pregnant woman. What can I do with you? You're good with the customers and within a night, you have already made you become famous. What a loss. I can't keep you. Or.. I might keep you. But there's one condition" he said while smirking

I hardly swallowed my saliva. It was bad, really bad. His big hands caressed me from my chin down on my neck. I shivered of disgust.  He stood up and asked me to undressed. I widen my eyes and shook my head. I couldn't do that. I just couldn't. My whole body was shivering with fear. He smirked more as he ed his pants.

-"Do you think you have a choice? Don't think you have any right here."

I held my tears and slowly obeyed. I kept on looking down. I could feel him rubbing his disgusting thing. He suddenly called my name while groaning. It was too much. I started to cry. I felt ashamed. Ashamed to let someone do that while looking at me. I was also scared. What was he going to do next? I clenched my teeth and let him do his thing. He suddenly walked toward me. He grabbed my hair and pulled my head backward before ing on my face.

My whole body was trembling. I moved backwards. He had this satisfied smile on his face. He told me to get dress and get lost. I wiped away the stinky white thing off of my face and quickly dressed up. I couldn't hold my tears. I felt filthy. I rushed out of the office. The top ten was still here. When they saw me, they had this horrified look on their face.

My legs were shaking to much that I couldn't even walk. I felt dizzy. They helped me to walk to my room. Once there, one of them helped me to shower myself. I am sorry. Taeyeon.. I am sorry. I didn't want to do that.. I am sorry.. Please Taeyeon forgive me. Tears kept on running on my cheeks. Once dried, I dressed up with new clothes. All of the top ten were here in the tiny room. I sat on the bed and tried to calmed down. After a little while, I finally calmed down.

Number nine and number three were sitting on my side. They didn't ask me what had happened. They knew. I took a deep breath and told them that I was pregnant. They looked stunned. I explained that I had huge debts to pay and so I couldn't stop working. They exchanged a look. Number one stepped toward me and squatted before me.

-"Don't worry, we will help you" she said

-"Why? We barely know each other.." I asked

-"You know, we are all equal in this industry. If we can't help each other..  there's no way we can survive" explained number two.

I smiled at them and thanked them. They were right. Here, we aren't living, we are surviving. Each of us here have a story, more or less sad, more or less complicated. The hosts world is the only place we have. That's why we have to help each other. I am glad that I met them. I might be able to survive here with them.

For a week, this situation went on. I became number one and number five finally found her way out of the industry. Every day, the Boss would call me out and do the same thing. Every time I felt filthy and cried. I was in front of his office. Today he had called me too. Yesterday, he wanted me to use my mouth. I refused and he hit me. I had to use ton of makeup to hide it from everyone. He went too far. I wanted to stop everything and to escape. But how? How could I run away? I was chained up. If I don't reimburse my debt.. I shook my head. I shouldn't think about this. I took a deep breath and lifted my head to knock.

I suddenly heard some weird noises down stairs. I startled as the boss violently opened the door. He pushed me and ran down stairs. I followed him. The police was on the first floor. The one that was forbidden. Apparently, this floor was used for es. I shivered a bit. I never thought that they were working here. The boss was yelling at the policemen and tried to corrupt them. Someone pulled my hand. It was number five.

She dragged me outside. We ran away for a while before stopping. We were soon joined by the nine other girls. I looked at them confused. Number five told me that she had met a policeman and that was why she could escape from the host club. Now everyone was free and could start anew. I suddenly realized something. What about my luggage? Number three laughed a bit and told me that she took everything when I was at the Boss' office.

I sighed in relived. I thanked them much. They were my savior. Number two walked toward me and handed me an envelope.  I looked inside. There was a plane ticket for Korea. I widen my eyes and looked at them. They were all born in the USA so they had some relatives that could welcome them. I had nowhere to go. So they bought me this ticket. I wanted to cry out of joy. A taxi was waiting for me. I hugged them one by one. I was about to go when I realized that I didn't know their name.

Ashley, Jenny, Marie, Lily, Victoria, Jesse, Katy, Teri, Nicky, Paige. Thank you. Thank you so much. I waved at them and went in the taxis. I couldn't help but smiling. It's over. Now I am free. Yeah finally. Once arrived at the airport, I paid the taxi man and rushed in. I quickly register my luggage and ran to take the plane. I thought that I would miss it. This time I had the 49B seat. An old Asian woman was sitting next to the porthole. I sat down and patiently waited for the plane to fly up.

The woman next to me was really talkative. We talked about everything and nothing. She told me that she had a grandson about my age and asked me if I wanted to meet him. I smiled at her and told her that I already had someone. I have someone... How can I face her now? I didn't know what I was going to do. I wanted to meet her. Right when I arrived. But that was impossible. I was too ashamed for that. I guess that I'll move to another city and find some work. Moreover, I guess that she has already forgotten about me. That thought hurt a lot. I held my chest to calm the pain but it didn't really worked.

After hours that sounded like days, I arrived in Seoul's airport. It felt great to come back home. I caught my luggage and walked out of the airport. It was eight pm. Where should I go? My old apartment had already been given to someone else. I called a Taxis and asked to go to a random hotel. I looked through the window. Although it was already kind of left, the streets were still busy. I suddenly recognized the neighborhood. I asked the taxi to stop. I paid the man, took my luggage and walked away. I remembered the way perfectly.

I stood in front of the tenement. !she may have moved away.. If that was the case, I would have lost her for real. I deeply breathed and walked in. I climbed the stairs until her floor. I knocked on the door and waited. There were no respond. I guess that she is still at her restaurant. I sat on some steps. I wasn't expecting too much of it. It just wanted her to listen to me. I didn't want her to pretend nothing happened. I didn't want her to pretend that everything was fine. I just wanted her to hear what I wanted to say. Just that.

I couldn't remember when it all started. Maybe it began when she welcomed me back then. Her clumsiness, her easy going personality, her kindness. One day, I woke up next to her and my heart beat so fast. I got scared. I was scared of my own feelings toward her. I don't know what scared me that much. Maybe the fact that If I fell for her, I would be hurt. So I ran away. I tried to convince myself that I was still in love with Nickhun and ran into his arms. Back then, I would never have thought that I hurt her that much.

Time passing, my feelings toward her didn't stop and even grew. It was too much for me to handle. When I learned that I was pregnant, I was panicked and ran to her. It must have hurt her too. I hid my face in my hands. I had no idea how much I hurt her. I was so stupid. When I finally accepted my own feelings, Boss told me that someone in the USA wanted me and that he had already received money from that person. That time, I thought that the world was ending. Then she chose that day to confess to me. Well, I must have known that she would come to me after I called Yuri. Maybe I was expecting her to come? I don't know.

Anyway, now I was here, waiting for her. I didn't care if she would forgive me or not. I just wanted to see her. Just a last time. Even if she refuses to talk to me. Just to see her, it will be enough. I waited like this a few hours. I suddenly heard some steps in the stairs. Was it her? My hands started to shake. I hid them in my jacket's pocket. I looked at her door and saw her in front of it. I could only see her back. I thought... I thought that just seeing her was enough. But it wasn't. I wanted to see her face. Please Taeyeon... Turn around.. I stood up.

As if she read my mind, she turned around. I saw her eyes widened as she recognized me. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was so beautiful.. A bit tired but so beautiful. I noticed a little dog on her side. My heart was beating so fast that I thought it would explode.

-"Tiffany.." She whispered.

-End of flashback-

After that, she let me in. Around a coffee, I told her everything. She scolded me pretty bad, saying that I should have said it earlier and she could have helped. Now that I think of it, it was quite funny. After that, we never separated. I smiled, the pain will still be there, but only in our memory. Now we are happy.

-"Taeyeon eomma!" Shouted Haneul.

He rushed in the restaurant and jumped in her arms. She joyfully laughed. Yuri, Yoogeun and Baekhyun were there. I greeted them. At first, they were all mad at me, but with the time, they forgave me.

I don't know for how long this happiness will be here, but until it disappears, I want to enjoy it. I want to cherish it until the last second. I guess that that won't be too hard.