Pairing: SeoTae

Genre: Angst

Oneshot for: meocon254

Taeyeon walked around the hospital, getting to know the place better. She's a doctor and recently started working there, and with recently, she meant today.

She's recognized for the, as people describe, almost miracle cures she finds to some patients' rare diseases so a few weeks ago they had asked her to work at this hospital, well it was more of a personal pettition from the hospital's director. 

Because apparently, the director's daughter has been a patient in the hospital for the past ten years, poor girl's only twenty three and she's already spent the best years of her life living in a hospital so Taeyeon agreed immediately.

Her thoughts were abruptly interrupted when a young woman crashed against her.

"I'm so sorry!" Said the girl several times while bowing deeply, although Taeyeon was not paying attention to that, she was staring shamelessly at the girls beautiful, listening to her calm voice and finally, noticing she was wearing a robe, indicating she was a patient.

"No need to apologize, I wasn't looking around either."  Said Taeyeon honestly. "Shouldn't you be in your room?" She asked.

"I am allowed to walk around, since I basically live here." Said the younger girl while sighing audibly. "I'm Seo Joohyun by the way."

Taeyeon's eyes got wider and she immediately bowed to the girl in front of her, confusing her immediately.

"I'm Doctor Kim Taeyeon." She said immediately, damn, she just crashed into her newest patient, who is none other than the daughter of her new boss. Great.

"Oh, you're the magical doctor that's supposed to cure me?" She said with an amused smile. "Good luck with that, there's no cure to what I have, I've seen more doctors than I can count and they all have just got it worse." She said simply. "You know why my father has brought you here for, right?" She said after they shared a moment of silence.

The doctor suddenly felt intimidated by the way the younger one was talking to her and just nodded before replying.

"To help you get better." She answered simply.

"No, he brought you here because they have an estimation, I'll die in about three months according to the last three doctors that saw me." She said as she walked past Taeyeon. "He doesn't understand that I'm ready to die, I've been ready all this time." She said coldly, stopping a few steps away from Taeyeon. "How can anyone want to stay alive when you haven't lived at all?" She whispered before speeding off and leaving a dumbfunded Taeyeon behind. 

She stared at her as she disspeared from her view. She then saw some nurses running towards her, seemingly out of breath.

"Excuse me have you seen a patient running around here? She escaped her room and she can't stay away from long, her condition is very delicate."

Taeyeon just nodded and pointed the direction in which Seohyun ran, watching as the nurses ran in that direction. 

She just stayed there, wondering how could she help someone who doesn't want to be helped?

"Hello Seohyun, how have you been feeling?" Taeyeon said as she entered her room, already working with the younger for a whole month, her life expectancy stayed the same, two more months, three if she was lucky.

"I'd probably know if there weren't so many medicines on my system, Dr. Kim." Answered Seohyun, it was surprising how even if she said those cold words, her voice still managed to sound beautiful.

"Well, considering how you normally feel, is this worse or better?" Asked Taeyeon as she sat on the edge of Seohyun's bed. 

"Surprisingly better." Said Seohyun as she looked at Taeyeon's eyes small hope flickering on her eyes as she did so, the doctor just frowned as she checked the results for her latest tests. 

"Are you... telling me the thruth?" Asked Taeyeon as she checked the results, her eyes watering just from the idea of it.

"Dr. Kim, I'm honest, I'm actually feeling better..."Whispered Seohyun as she stared worriedly at the older one.

"Your results... in general, it says that in fact your condition has worsened..." She whispered, she saw the small hope in Seohyun's eyes die and her gaze turned cold. "Your life expectancy has been reduced to about six weeks, eight weeks if we work hard."

Tears started streaming from Seohyun's face and she looked up at the ceiling. 

"I don't want to work hard anymore." She whispered. "I want to stop trying, to stop filling myself with hope, to stop believing I can actually live because I'm not getting any better and we all know it." She started sobbing, hugging her knees as she did so. "Just let me die already."

Taeyeon felt the tears stinging in her eyes, so she did the only logical thing she could think of.

She hugged Seohyun closely. 

The younger tensed as she felt Taeyeon's arms wrap around her body but eventually gave in, crying harder as she wrapped her arms around the petite body of the doctor, crying until she no longer had the strenght to continue crying and she fell asleep.

Taeyeon laid the body of the twenty three year old on the bed and then got off from there. She fled quickly as she made her way to Dr. Seo's office.

"Sir, your daughter has no chances of surviving, take her home, let her know what life outside a hospital is instead of keeping her here, drugged for the rest of her days." Taeyeon said sternly as she stood in front of her boss.

"That's not for you to decide, just do your damn job and find a cure." Dr. Seo said as he kept looking through something on his computer.

"It's not your decision, your daughter is legally an adult, it's her decision." Taeyeon said as she glared at her boss.

"Don't get involved in something you're not related to." Answered Seo's dad as he stood up from his desk and stood in front of Taeyeon, trying to intimidate her with his height.

"Don't make decisions that aren't yours, are you really letting your daughter die without even having lived? Having spent the best years of her life trapped in a hospital bed?" Taeyeon said daringly.

"So you're refusing to do the job you were assigned as a doctor here?" Asked Dr. Seo as she looked dully at Taeyeon. The younger doctor knew where this was going, but with a reputation like hers, she could find a job in any damn hospital she wanted to.

"Precisely." Taeyeon said with no hesitance in her voice, already knowing what was next.

Taeyeon walked out of the room after arguing with Dr. Seo for good ten minutes more, but it was useless, that man was too stubborn, it sort of reminded her of Seohyun. As she opened the door to leave the office, she couldn't help but notice the person that almost fell, presumably leaning against the door a few seconds ago listening to whatever they were saying.

She was rather surprised when she noticed it was Seohyun, looking as stern as ever.

"I'm leaving." She said looking at her father. "I want to know what it's like to live, just let me try it for a month, then I'll be back, waiting patiently for my death."

"Joohyun, no need, just, I'll look for a new doctor, you'll get better, ok?"

Seohyun just shook her head as she left the place. 

"I'll fill my papers to leave the place, mind coming with me, Dr. Kim?" Taeyeon just nodded meekly as she watched the tears fall down from Dr. Seo's face as they made their way out.

Taeyeon would've never guessed, that when Seohyun told her 'Mind coming with me?' she meant quite literally. The girl had asked her if she could stay at Taeyeon's house, because she knew her parents would just try to get her back to the hospital instead of letting her live.

So now, Seohyun was staying at Taeyeon's house, and was looking for something interesting to do. Taeyeon, she... decided that while Seohyun was there she shouldn't find a job yet.

She took the younger one to the zoo, to the park, to the amusement park, to the movie theater, to watch a musical, she had taken her to a club, to a bar, to anywhere Seohyun wanted, as long as she was happy. It had already been three weeks, just one week before the younger one returned to the hospital, and she had ran out of ideas by then.

Although, there was something that kept coming to Taeyeon's mind. But she knew she couldn't, she shouldn't, because she'd just get her heart broken in a way she can never even imagine. Because she had fallen for the younger girl, the way her eyes gleamed everytime they did something new, how she found the beauty in little and big things, the way she seemed to be enjoying every breath, because the younger one was aware that she was going to die.

And Taeyeon too was aware she was going to die, so she knew that she couldn't express her feelings out loud, she was just going to hurt herself and Seohyun.

"Taeyeon..." Murmured Seohyun as she walked towards the older woman.

"Mmh?" Hummed Taeyeon.

"Can we watch chick flicks and eat lots of ice cream tonight?" Asked the younger one as she leaned down and laid her head on Taeyeon shoulder, wrapping her arms around her mid section. 

Taeyeon frowned at this, because Seohyun more tired, paler, more sick than she used to. But she also seemed happier and less snarky, so she decided to ignore the doctor side of herself that told her this wasn't the best.

"Why?" Asked Taeyeon with an amused tone of voice as she did so.

"Because in movies, girls seem to watch chick flcks and cry over the movies while eating ice cream, I've never done something like that." She said simply, her breath brushing against Taeyeon's neck and causing her to shiver slightly.

"Okay." Answered Taeyeon.

Watching chick flick with Seohyun was actually very entertaining, for a young girl she was very dense and dull mainly when it came to relationships, maybe because she's never been in one.

"I don't get it," Said Seohyun during the movie. "I don't get what's romantic about that, kissing while it's raining? You'd catch a cold and you could accidentaly drink the dirty rain water, also, why carry her? He'll just tire his arms and look like a wimp in fron of her." 

And many, many other statements that almost made Taeyeon burst into laughter during the movie, but she was far too busy eating icecream for her to actually laugh out loud.

When the movie was finally over, neither of them had shed a single tear, Seohyun seemed utterly confused and Taeyeon was half done with her ice cream.

"I don't get it." Said Seohyun as they both were laying on Taeyeon's bed.

"What don't you get?" Said Taeyeon as she placed the ice cream on the nightstand, feeling too full from eating all that icecream.

"Why are kisses so important?" She asked, causing Taeyeon to look at her with wide eyes. 

"Kisses are important because it's a very meaningful way to express your feelings to other persons, romanticaly most of the times." Taeyeon said simply, but the she could notice the younger just stared at her confused. "It is said, although I can't confirm it, that when you kiss someone, you can tell if they're the right one for you or not." 

"How could I know if that person's the right one from kissing her?" Asked Seohyun, Taeyeon failed to notice the small distance between them.

"Well, I've hear that when you kiss the right one, you see fireworks behind your eyes, you feel happiness overtake you, a tingling feelings runs all over your body and it stays on your stomach making you feel as if you have butterflies in there and when you kiss them, you feel like an eternty has gone by but only a few seconds have really passed." Taeyeon answered honestly.

She stared as the younger girl seemed to be in deep thought, probably processing what she had just said.

Taeyeon blinked for a second and by the time she fluttered her eyes open again, she saw how the girl's face was already too close to hers, another bat of an eye and Seohyun's lips were on hers.

She stayed like that, frozen, while the younger one pressed her lips against hers, her eyes strongly shut whle Taeyeon could just blink, utterly confused. 

She felt the way her heart seemed to start to beat so fast she felt like she was going to have a then and there. She noticed how she felt a tingle ran all over her body and finally stop in her stomach, although rather than butterflies she felts as if combat planes were flying at full speed all over her stomach before shooting at each other and maybe throwing bombs around everyonce in a while.

She didn't know how much had it been already, but it sure felt like forever.

Seohyun started to back away, probably thinking that Taeyeon had rejected her, but just when her lips were no longer in contact with Taeyeon's, the older one closed her eyes and pulled her in once again, kissing her in an almost desperate state.

Taeyeon tilted her head quickly, hoping to create a more passionate kiss, but as she noticed how Seohyun failed to follow her rythm, she realized that the younger one had never kissed anyone before and neede guidance.

She then started to slow down the kiss, her lips mapping out Seohyun's with slow , the younger followed suit and seemed to be more comfortable with the new rythm. The taller of the two placed her hands on Taeyeon's forearms and the latter wrapped her own around the tiny waist of the younger, pulling her closer as her kiss slowly turned more passionate.

"You don't have to do this." Managed Seohyun between their kisses, her hands sliding all the way to the older one's shoulders.

"I know." Whispered Taeyeon as she bit Seohyun's lips. She parted ways and pressed her forehead against the younger one's. "I want to, which it's different."

She noticed the hope that flickered on Seohyun's eyes and she smiled at the pureness of the girl in front of her.

"I don't want to anymore." Said Seohyun as she closed her eyes, tears threathening her to fall.

"What is it?" Said Taeyeon as worry came over her.

"I don't want to die anymore." 

Seohyun had already spent four weeks at the hospital, Taeyeon by her side every single second of the day. 

Her time was getting closer and they all knew, Seohyun's father knew it, Seohyun's mother knew it, Taeyeon knew it. Anymoment now she could just leave and Seohyun herself was aware of it.

"I love you." Whispered Seohyun one night, just before Taeyeon was thrown out because visit hours were over.

A sad bitter smile came over Taeyeon's features, she leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips, the strong taste of medicine lingering on her lips.

"I love you too." She said, a content smile crossed the younger girl's lips and she closed her eyes contently, satisfied expression crossing her features.

The beeping sound that came after a second made Taeyeon break down and bawl her eyes out.