xxv
Keep Shining My Star
He breath heavily on my lips, I can feel the sensation from his heated soft lips from me. What is this? I feel like the most stupid person in the world.
This is not supposed to be happening.
This is all wrong.
I know it is not the part of my revenge.
But why? But why I feel completely happy being the most stupid person?
He stopped, now he is staring at me confused eyes. This couldn't be real. Damn. Damn.
His eyes. Completely like mine.
Why do I feel like I am him? Why do I feel like I need to be in him?
Screw the beautiful heart of mine.
I wish it was never mine.
"The floor is damn cold." He said softly.
You care about the damn cold floor? Why? Why he needs to point it out. I don't understand this. He just kissed me, kissed me passionately that made my knees turned into cream. "And?" I mumbled.
"You might catch a cold."
"Why would I catch a cold?"
He smirked at me, that boyish grin of him. I don't understand him. Like I don't understand myself now. "Don't you know you are seducing me?" He asked me.
WHAT.THE.HELL.
I am seducing him? I didn't do a thing but he's saying I am seducing him. What on earth Jung Yonghwa?
"Didn't plan too." I said, plainly.
He slapped his body on the cold floor, I was shocked because his body just bang the floor. And I know that hurts. Is he that kind of crazy? He can lie on the floor slowly. "Just kidding."
I stared at him, I am sitting and I can feel the floor is damn cold. And he is lying there, he will the one that will catch a cold, not me. "You might catch a cold." I repeated what he said.
"Why would I catch a cold?" He asked and giggled like a boy. It's the first time he giggled like that, as if he won a lottery. That made me smile.
"Don't you know you are seducing me?" I begin to . Completely what he asked a while ago that freaked me out.
He stared at me. "Then lay your body beside me." He smiled.
I tapped his arm. But that made him reached my hand and dragged me to lie beside him. He made his arm as my pillow.
Now, I felt he is really seducing me. His arm is hard but I felt comfortable. I didn't refuse. I wouldn't.
"Why do you keep on following me?" He asked out of the blue. "You know how much I hated fans."
I was staring at the tattered ceiling of the court. The small lights coming from the moonlight are shining on the holes, I can't help but to admire the feeling. "So, when you hate fans you kiss them like that?" I decided to laugh hard. I didn't expect that I will crack simple jokes on him. I am this comfortable to him. I know he is completely like me, so I know he love that kind of laughters.
"Maybe, if they are as beautiful as you." He said.
"You're sweet now like at the hospital, but why you are so cold back then when I went here?" I asked him.
"Answer me first why you are here back then?"
"I don't know. I told you I don't know." I honestly said. That is the truth, I don't even know why I feel comfortable on his hardened arm.
Why do I feel happy whenever he smile?
"Then I don't know too." He replied. "I'm sleepy."
I stared at him as he close his eyes. I sit up, I need to go home now. Norie might worry to death. I need to get back on my world.
"I'm sleepy." He repeated.
"I'm going home now." I said.
"Don't go." He said while his eyes were still closed.
I smiled. "Jerk, I need to go home. There's someone waiting for me."
"Then just call that someone that you can't go home because I'm not letting you." I grabbed my hand and let me sleep my head on his arm. "I'm sleepy and I want us to sleep now."
"Geez, Jung Yonghwa." I blurted. "I'm not sleepy and I'm going home." I tried to stand but his other arm grabbed my waist and made me face him. "You are really that controlling." I whispered to him. "Can you let me go?"
He wiggled his head.
I'm lost.
I'm getting lost.
I closed my eyes. And painful memories started to be clear on my mind. What happened to my revenge? What happened to my so called revenge?
I wanted to bury him alive. I wanted to disgust him.
I wanted him to be as lonely as me.
But that moment, when I saw him sweating like hell.
Persevering everything he have.
Dribbling those balls like his life depended on it, like this cold floor is giving him the energy to him.
That moment, I forgot everything I planned.
I forgot everything about the sad memories.
I forgot that I can't dance anymore.
I forgot my own self and saw a new me on him.
I forgot Shinhye existed on Park Shinhye, I realized Shinhye will exist on Jung Yonghwa.
I forgot what I am fighting for and I realized I'm kissing him back already.
Seeing Jung Yonghwa giving his all and hiding what's capable of him on the people who keep dragging him.
That's completely like me.
Now, staring at his beautiful calm face while his arm are wrapped on my waist I can't help but to smile. I slowly caress his face, he didn't move. He is sleeping already.
He is calm now, but not dangerous anymore.
He is calm now, and he is like a boy sleeping on his Mom's lap. He's breathing is very normal.
"I will make you play again. I will make you shine again, like how you see and admire the stars above." I whispered to him.
I smiled and closed my eyes again as tears continue to fall.
No more revenge, even I haven't reach the peak I'm waiting. Screw all this revenge.
I'll forget that I can't dance anymore, and I'll make him play again.
Sincerely, as the stars won't leave him.
Sincerely, from now on.
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