“Who is Oh Sehun?”

Minseok’s face turned from happiness, to sorrow in a matter of seconds. Inside, I felt a bit guilty. It was obvious the man sitting in front of me was my boyfriend, but I had brought up someone who had made me feel just as loved. It took Minseok a minute to gather his thoughts, before telling me.

“Sehun… he… he was your ex. I don’t know what went down between you two, but sometimes, I could hear you mumble his name in your sleep. He must’ve been very important to you. I could tell that, that you still couldn’t forget him, even after a few months of us.” Minseok sighed, looking away.

The now raining skies did not help the thick silence between us at that moment. Occasionally, there was a low rumble of thunder and a flash of lightning. The mood this storm brought had triggered a memory inside my mind.

Outside, it was pouring rain and the thunder rumbled loudly in the dark grey skies. I was sitting alone, on a couch in a modern apartment, staring blankly at the wall in front of me. Nothing was going right that day, I remembered clearly. Whoever I was with had been very distant and it had taken an influence on me. I no longer called any of my friends to go eat with, or just hang out with. I became isolated to a lot of my close friends and family. Something was stressing me.

When the clock turned 4:00 pm, the door opened and in came a man—a man I was very intimate with. He greeted me with a monotone voice and a kiss on the head that was void of any warm emotion. This man was the reason for my troubles.

“Sehun,” I said, the name rolling right off my tongue, as if fate made this name specifically for me.

“Yes, Luhan?” Sehun was undoing his tie and taking off his damp coat, leaving him in a white dress shirt that showed off his perfect body. Seeing this, I somehow snapped out of my trance and stared at him, long and hard. “Is something bothering you?” He asked when he turned around to find me staring at him, eyes squinted.

“Yes, in fact,” my heart was pounding loudly in my chest. Why? Because I was scared to do what I was about to do. “Why are you so distant? This is not normal. Is there something going on that I don’t know about? This thing you’re doing is subconsciously influencing me. My parents and friends are getting concerned. They’re all pinpointing the reason to be you. I always denied it because I love you with all of my heart and soul, but I had time to think about it today and I realized that it is because of you. You’re the reason my parents are worried. You’re the reason why I am so isolated. You know, the only thing in my world is you, but now, you’re so far that it’s hard to see what my world is. I should just leave-”

Sehun cut me off before I could finish. “Then why don’t you leave, if you believe that it won’t work out.” I sat there in utter shock. That one sentence had sent me on a roller coaster of emotions; mainly heartbreak.

“N-no, I-I-” I couldn’t keep myself composed as the warm tears threatened to burst from their captivity. “I l-love you so much, you don’t even know!” I cried loudly, wiping away the waterfalls that had fallen from my eyes.

“Then why are you complaining?” Sehun asked simply.

Without another word, I stood up and left the apartment, not looking back or responding to Sehun’s calls for me. I just left him like that, and I didn’t even bother to go back. Because of this rash act, Sehun still resided in my mind and took up the space in my heart, leaving barely enough room to love Minseok. A day after my sudden outburst and leave, I went back and retrieved my things while Sehun was at work and didn’t bother to leave a note. I was so overcome with sorrow that I didn’t want to be in the apartment any longer. It just reminded me of the happy memories I shared with Sehun and that made me just want to cry all over again. The last thing I left him with was the engagement ring he had given me just a few days before. It ended on a rainy day.

“Luhan,” Minseok’s voice brought me back to the reality I was in. The reality without Sehun.

“My phone, please.” I said quietly, raising my arm slightly to point to my phone sitting on the windowsill, charging. Minseok nodded and unplugged it, bringing it over to me. I took the familiar device in my trembling hands and unlocked it. Five missed calls.

First missed call, mom.

Second missed, dad.

Third, Kyungsoo.

Fourth, Yixing.

Fifth, Oh Sehun.

There was one voicemail from each of them; probably wondering if I was ok. The ones from my parents were spoken in frantic Mandarin, asking if I was ok, if I remembered who I was, who they were, and when my birthday was. The voicemails left from my friends were practically the same thing.

My thumb hesitated over Sehun’s. Why would he call me? Was he worried? We hadn’t contacted each other in god knows how long. I was scared to listen, but my thumb hit the play button anyway and I raised the phone to my ear. On came the all too familiar voice that made my heart go wild.

Hi, Luhan. Long time no talk, I guess. This is Sehun, by the way. I didn’t know if you had deleted my number or not. I bet you had. Well, I’m just calling to make sure you’re alright. After Minseok had told me, I was really worried. I know we left off at the wrong spot and… I just want to finish things properly. If you are ok with it, after you are discharged from the hospital, would you meet me at our favorite café? Well, I should be letting you get some rest. Good bye.

I took the phone from my ear slowly, a few tears falling. Minseok had already left the hospital because it was now past visiting hours, so I was all alone.

After few minutes of silence, I heard a knock on my door and the nurse came in with a bouquet of flowers. It was an arrangement of my favorites, hydrangeas.

“Mr. Xiao, someone had just delivered this for you. There is a card that goes with it too.” She set the flowers down on the nightstand and began to check the machines that were hooked up to me. When she finished, she bowed to me and left, bidding me goodnight.

When she closed the door, I sat up slightly and took the flowers from the nightstand and smiled. They were beautiful. Then, I put them down and took the card. In a fancy scrawl, it said “From Oh Sehun.” My heart began pounding as I opened the envelope and pulled the card out. On the front was a beautifully done water color painting of a bouquet of hydrangeas. I opened the card and inside was a long message, written in the handwriting I knew so well.

Hello, Luhan. I hope this reaches you today. If it does, I’m glad you are doing fine. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if we left off where we did. I really wish it was different. That day you left me, just like today, I was sure you would come back and we would make up like we always did. I realized when you left the engagement ring on my bed that I had gone too far the day before. I would like to say more in person, because I feel like a card won’t convey my emotions.

I hope you liked the flowers. I remember you told me they were your favorite on our first date.

-Sehun.

I slowly closed the card, sudden realization taking over me. I should have never left his side. He was hurting just as I was. It was such a rash decision and I was such a fool. From his letter, it seemed like he wanted to make up, but from his voicemail, it told me that he wanted to finish our relationship and move on.

I didn’t know which one I wanted.

A/N: Holy , bros. I actually updated this story. I know where this is going and I was on a serious emotional roller coaster while writing this. I really hoped you liked this chapter. It's really dramatic. My feels are like, all over the place.

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