Donghae could not keep his eyes off the ring in his hands as he played with it absent-mindedly. A lump formed in his throat, and however much he tried to swallow, it wouldn’t go away. He knew he was already on the verge of breaking but part of him still wanted to stubbornly deny his feelings for that prankster; that they had died on the day he left him without a word. Yet he couldn’t comprehend the pang of pain squeezing his heart none too gently either.

Hyukjae had left him without even so much of a goodbye. The inspector could remember the weeks and weeks of sleepless nights where he’d cry unstoppably when he’d found out, but as the years passed, he’d learnt to move on. To shut down his heart and not let anyone else enter again. All those years he’d stayed single, and when either Kyuhyun or Sungmin or his other friends asked him about it, he just replied that he was too busy to date. They knew better than to push on that subject, and so they had let him be. Years later, Donghae learnt that Hyukjae was back and also joined the force, but his heart had hardened by then. Even when HQ told him to take Hyukjae under his wing for half a year, he was determined not to let anything in the past get between them. That was the initial plan. What Donghae didn’t plan on though, was Hyukjae getting kidnapped and finding his old engagement ring in his home. Why did the elder hold on to it even after leaving him for years? And add to that the fact that Hyukjae had been wearing its counterpart when he got kidnapped; did it mean that Hyukjae had somewhat been holding on to the faint hope that they could be together again? Or was he saving the ring for someone else? Why hadn’t he noticed it on his finger before?

Donghae groaned and sank his head into his hands. So many questions, and there was not a single answer to them. He hated it when he thought too much because it always gave him a headache, and he was pretty sure he was getting a monster. The ring dropped onto the glass table with a clatter, the sound echoing throughout the quiet office lounge.

“Donghae.”

The inspector looked up from his hands with narrowed eyes at the concerned face of Sungmin. He dropped his head down again with a grunt. Sungmin nearly never called him by his first name in the office; only when the inspector was in need of a friend and not another officer.

“What, hyung?”

Sungmin sighed and placed a cup of coffee in front of the younger before sinking down onto the sofa next to him. He draped an arm over Donghae and squeezed his shoulders upon hearing another grunt. “Chill. Kyu is already trying the best he can. Unfortunately his phone was switched off so it’s taking a little longer than usual.”

Donghae began to tremble as another wave of guilt wrecked him. “I—I should have listened to him from the start,” he said quietly, trying not to let his voice betray his emotions. “It’s all my fault…”

“It’s not entirely your fault,” Sungmin said, although he wasn’t too sure about it. “We were wrong as well.”

“He’s such an idiot,” the younger mumbled, but his voice was rising with each word. “Why did he have to go and get himself kidnapped? Isn’t it bad enough that Siwon has killed three more people already? Why did he want to make himself the fourth victim??”

“Hush, Donghae. You know you don’t mean it,” the officer tried reasoning with him. “You know very well Hyukjae has no intentions of becoming the next victim. He knows enough martial arts to keep his skin intact. Didn’t you say so yourself earlier? Stop thinking about the worst case scenarios. It just makes you feel worse.”

“Hyung…”

Sungmin opened his arms and enveloped the younger in his embrace. It reminded him a lot about the only other time when the very same thing happened, which was seven years ago. Donghae found out Hyukjae disappeared from the ends of the earth just one day after he’d proposed to him. At that time, Donghae had been an emotional mess; Sungmin and Kyuhyun took turns spending the night with him because he would wake up in the middle of the night crying and sobbing for Hyukjae, and nearly committed suicide once by overdosing on sleeping pills. It took them another half a year before his emotions began settling down and he could sleep on his own again.

“I’m sorry, Donghae. I’m so sorry.”

Donghae felt relatively better when Sungmin finally let go of him. He sniffed, look