The cold water woke Kai up completely as he flapped his legs; there was no surface where he could put his feet. He held his breath for as long as he could, but eventually he couldn’t and the water entered through his ears, mouth, and nose.

This is it. It’s not like it matters, no one will miss me. No one will notice that I’m gone.

He heard a faint splash, someone was swimming towards him but he didn’t notice it due to the tight feeling in his chest. His lungs began to burn and his arms and legs were flailing around everywhere.

Suddenly, someone grabbed onto his waist and dragged him up to the surface. Kai struggled, what was this person doing? He was supposed to be drowning.

But Kai’s efforts were weak and the next thing he knew, he was out of the water. The cool morning air caused his cold, wet body to shiver. He coughed madly as he struggled to breathe.

He was thrown onto the grass and someone was doing chest compressions on him. He coughed up water and hacked some more. After a couple of minutes, the coughing stopped and he breathed heavily.

He sat up and looked at the person who had taken him out of the water.

An angry (and wet) Suho was glaring at him.

“What –were –you –doing?” he gritted his teeth. Kai coughed some more and shivered in the cool air.

Suho sighed and picked up his dry jacket that he had taken off before jumping in the water. He put it around Kai’s shoulders.

“Who the hell told you to come out in shorts and a tank top?” he growled as he helped Kai stand up. The sun had just risen and Suho was wearing sweats and a t-shirt.

“I didn’t think I’d be coming out of the water,” Kai mumbled.

Suho almost slapped him.

“What's wrong? What happened? Are you going mentally insane?” Suho asked.

Kai didn’t reply. There was no solid reason for what he had almost done, he just hated the way he lived, without a reason.

“Why? Are you lonely? You know what Kai, you're stronger than that, I know you are,” Suho said in a hard voice. He had always figured Kai suffered from loneliness but was unaware of to what extent it was. “Loneliness has consumed you, but trust me, it can't destroy you. There are problems everywhere, but the way you’re thinking isn’t the way to solve them.”

Kai remained quiet as they began to walk.  

“Now, you don't seem like the 'talk about your feelings' kind of guy, but I could get you a psychiatrist,” Suho suggested, already predicting Kai's answer.

Kai shook his head, “Don't even suggest that.”

“I didn't think so,” Suho shrugged. “But you can't resort to.... that. Don't be an idiot, Kai, please.”

“Then what do I do?” Kai said in a voice of defeat that was most unlike his usual self and surprised Suho. “I have nothing to live for.”

“You have lots to live for. Trust me,” Suho said firmly. “Now do you need me to babysit you 24/7?”

Kai looked at him and then mumbled, “I'm good.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, don't worry,” Kai mumbled, feeling both embarrassed and stupid for letting a dream affect his mind so much. But there was no doubt that the emptiness in his life was getting to him.

“Good. Now go take a hot shower, stay at home from school today, and do something productive,” Suho instructed as they arrived in front of Kai's home.

“I'll see you at work then. Right?” Suho eyed him.

“Yeah.”

“Good. Take care of yourself,” Suho said before Kai nodded and walked into his house.  He took the jacket off and then remembered it was Suho's. He rushed back out to see if he was there, but Suho had already left. Kai decided to just put it in the laundry, it was wet anyways.

As he was picking out dry clothes, he let out a sneeze. Great. Now I'm sick.

He quickly took his clothes into the bathroom and started a hot shower.

It’s true though, no one would notice. There’s no one to notice.

◌◌◌◌

Sehun walked to school on Wednesday, kicking rocks along the way. He rubbed his eyes, he hadn’t slept well. He kept having weird dreams that he never remembered when he woke up.

He watched the other kids walk to school, laughing and pushing each other. He saw two freshmen boys walking not too far from him. One of them kept pushing the other, and he would end up being pushed even harder.

Sehun smiled a little. We were like that. Love-hate.

His smile vanished and he looked away. Now focusing on not remembering the past, he didn’t see where he was going and as he walked by a tree, one of the branches pierced his hand, leaving a deep, long cut.

“Oi!” he looked at his hand blew on it. Then realizing that doing that was absolutely useless, he used his free hand and rummaged through his pockets for a tissue. He found one and used it to wipe the blood, but the cut was pretty deep and wouldn’t stop bleeding.

Oh forget it. He chucked the bloody tissue in the trash and left his hand like that, getting annoyed of trying to stop the blood from running. As he was walking, some people noticed his bloody hand and it triggered gossip.

“I didn’t think he was the fighting kind of guy.”

 “That looks bad.”

“I told you he was part of a gang.”

Sehun rolled his eyes at the comments. People will assume anything.

He walked to homeroom and sat down in his seat. To prevent anymore stupid comments, he looked through his bag and pockets for more tissues.

“Well, I’m guessing you won the fight everyone is talking about,” A clean handkerchief was placed in front of him and Sunye was standing beside his desk.

“Thanks,” he muttered. “And yeah, sure I did.”

Sunye laughed, “So what really happened?”

“A stupid tree,” he muttered, cleaning the blood. “It won’t stop!”

“Go to the nurse,” Sunye advised.

“Be right back, tell the teacher where I am,” he said and then stood up and headed to the nurse’s office. When he got there, the nurse was organizing some cabinets with her back to the doorway.

“Um,” Sehun cleared his throat.

Ms. Choi turned around, “Oh, Sehun. What brings you here?”

“My hand won’t stop bleeding,” he mumbled, removing the handkerchief and showing it to her.

“Oh my. That’s a bad cut,” she led him to the counter. “How did this happen?”

He explained what happened as she took some things out of a cupboard.

“You should be more careful,” she said, dipping a cotton ball into some medicine. “This will sting.”

Sehun didn’t even flinch when she pressed the stingy medicine on his cut. She rubbed it and then bandaged it.

“There, it’ll stop soon,” she patted the bandage and smiled at him. “Would you like a lollipop?”

Sehun blinked, “No thanks.”

Ms. Choi laughed, “Big boy now, eh?”

Sehun gave her a small smile and then headed back to the door. “Bye miss. Thanks,” he waved and left the office. As he walked through the empty halls, the girl from the other day, Jihyun, turned the corner.

“Sehun!” she smiled.

“Hello.”

“How are you doing?” she asked cheerfully.

“Fine,” he replied, not in the nicest tone.

“What happened to your hand?” she asked, peering at ir curiously.

“It was an accident.”

“I see,” she nodded. She looked around, “So where’s Kai?”

“Look, you haven’t seen me for years, so obviously you’ve missed out on some changes,” Sehun said in an annoyed voice. “But there have been some major ones.”

“Changes?” she looked confused. “What kind?”

“The bad kind,” he said coldly before walking away.

◌◌◌◌

Sehun entered his apartment and threw himself on the old sofa.

He sighed. He had nothing to do, no one to visit, nothing to look forward to.

So what is exactly was the point of his life? It felt like all-purpose had been lost since that day four years ago.

There was a knock on the door one day in the summer before Sehun and Kai started high school. Kai and Sehun were in the family room, figuring out how to stuff a toy panda into a jar and Mina was colouring in a colouring book. Woobin went to answer the door and they heard unfamiliar voices talking with Woobin. They talked for quite a while but Sehun and Kai didn’t notice.

“S-Sehun, come here,” Woobin came into the family room and called Sehun over.

“No, put that leg in first. Sorry, hyung what’d you say?” Sehun looked over at him.

“Come here,” Woobin beckoned him over. There were two men standing in the foyer and Kai and Mina snuck up behind them to watch.

“Hello Oh Sehun,” one man smiled and said in a nastily kind voice. “We’re from the Child Care and Support of South Korea.”

“Er, hi,” Sehun said unsurely.

“We need you to come with us," the other man smiled all too kindly.

"Excuse me?"

But that was pretty much all that Sehun got to say on the matter. He had to go with those men and he had been dumped at the orphanage, not knowing how or why he was there. He had just been told that this was his new home, and that was that.

To this day, Sehun did not understand how those men had been able to take him away from his brothers and sister. How was that even allowed? It made absolutely no sense, there had to be another reason. After he escaped the second orphanage  he had been sent to months later, he had tried going back to his old home, but Woobin, Kai, and Mina had moved houses. Since he was technically a missing child, he couldn’t go to the police and ask where they were. And how would he prove to them that he was their sibling to get their private information? Sehun had made every effort to try and find them again, but it was hopeless. He assumed that Kai and the other two didn’t know where Sehun was either.

Once or twice he had thought his birth parents had requested that he be moved to the orphanage. He didn’t know anything about them and when he had asked his adoptive parents when he was younger, their faces clouded and they changed the subject. If his biological parents did have a hand in it, he would be angry. Who were they to move Sehun around from his true family? They had no right to decide where Sehun went if they hadn’t wanted to raise him.

Sehun hated how he had all these unanswered questions and he hated how he was stuck in the past. He needed something to do, something to take his mind off disturbing thoughts. He wanted to actually do something productive so he wasn’t stuck in his thoughts all the time.

Then, quite abruptly, he got an idea. He fished his phone out of his pocket and dialed the performing arts building’s number.

“Hello?” Mrs. Lee spoke.

“Mrs. Lee? It’s me, Sehun,” Sehun said. “I think I’ll take the instructing job.”

◌◌◌◌

Kai called the school and told them he would be out sick. He groaned as he tried to find a comfortable position on the sofa. He sniffled and sat upright.

Bad idea. He slumped back down into the sofa when his head started spinning. His phone rang and he groaned loudly. Ughh, I don’t want to pick it up!

He let his voice mail answer and listened to the message being left.

“Hello, Mr. Kim Jongin. We’ve been told you will be volunteering at our library for um, certain reasons. We have spoken with the head of the library and he is fine with you working with us. Everything is set, we just need you to call us back to give us some additional information. Thank you.”

Kai groaned again, he had forgotten about the volunteer work he had to do at the library. Great.

After lying down a bit more he felt better and then got up and went to the kitchen to make himself soup. As he was waiting for it to simmer, he decided to call Suho to tell him he won’t be at work.

“Kai?” Suho spoke.

“It’s me,” he coughed. “I caught a cold. I can’t come to work.”

“Hm. Cold, eh?” he could tell Suho was raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, maybe if you hadn’t-”

“DO YOU WANT ME TO KILL YOU FOR YOU?!” Suho roared, causing Kai to hold the phone away from his ear.

“Kidding, kidding.”

“Good. Do you want me to come over? Are you feeling too sick?”

“It’s okay, I can manage.”

“Okay then. Rest well,” Suho said.

“Bye,” Kai hung up and poured his soup into a big bowl. He settled into his couch and put on a random show on TV.

He didn’t pay much attention to the show, just mindlessly watched, occasionally letting out a small chuckle.

He let out a sigh as he put the empty bowl down beside him.

Maybe this library thing will keep me distracted from any more disturbing thoughts.

◌◌◌◌

Hiya!

Look at me updating quick #goilovelays

I have a random feeling that this fic makes absolutely no sense and I just don't like it anymore....... I hate this. Does it make sense? I mean obviously Sehun being taken away to an orphanage doesn't but that'll be explained later... much later actually. But does it fit? Blah I dunno!

Putting that aside, I have a story about one of my epic fails for you. So at the end of the day at school on Friday I was getting my stuff and then I drop a whole bunch of my papers. (I hate it when I do that omg so embarrassing.)Anyways, these two guys picked them up for me and I thanked them and then they left.

Then I dropped them again. #failureoftheyear

I love God's Gift- 14 Days! It's so good <3

Byebye~! :D

PS I fixed the font from last chapter :)