word count: 2419

     After that simple dinner date, they were seeing each other more often. At the dance studio, the club, and their job, which they ironically laughed when they found out that they worked in the same coffee shop, they interacted with wide smiles and a happy glint in their eyes. Roxanne learned that Lay was actually born in China and came to South Korea to start a dancing career as a dance teacher. And Lay learned that Roxanne was majoring in English so that she can travel to either North America or England to experience the very different culture from hers. He also learned that Roxanne would love to teach English in South Korea as a high school teacher. They would always ask each other what the translation for a word or object is in English or Chinese; and Roxanne would think how adorable it was for Lay to speak in Chinese making the latter pout. On the other hand, Lay thought it was cool how Roxanne can speak English so fluently. In public, they are non-stop teasers. The two adolescents would pick on each other and make fun of each other, but there was no harm in their words. In fact, the small bullying brought laughter to their lips. Also, they sometimes visited each other in their own places to play video games or share music or dance together/against each other. Or they simply don’t talk at all and cuddle together all night long until morning came.

     People were noticing the encounters between the lady and gentleman, and everyone thought they were in an intimate relationship. However, both the adolescents would shake it off or deny it, because yes, it was true. They weren’t in an intimate relationship. Neither of the two even properly asked the latter to be in a commitment with each other. Both of them never even thought of anything serious happening between them, but no matter how much they opposed on the rumor, everyone just assumed that they were in an unofficial relationship.

     The status slightly bothered Roxanne and Lay, but they looked on the positive side by thinking that, at least, they’ll leave them alone. Few months had passed, and the routine was still the same for them. When they met in a particular location or saw each other due their priorities, they would smile and laugh at each other and tease each other to no end. But that’s the thing. It was the same thing over and over again. The same touches, the same environment, the same feeling – it was all the same for Roxanne. She tried to make their encounters different, but even when she did, there’s still something wrong as if there’s a missing piece to the puzzle. However, Roxanne doesn’t know where the missing puzzle piece is or what it even is in the first place. When she finds the lost fragment, what kind of picture would it make?

     Roxanne was troubled by this missing feeling. She even wondered at times if Lay felt the same way, as well. If he didn’t, then she might be slightly delusional and fairly paranoid. If he did, then that would make the dirty blonde even more confused. However, she was right. Lay did feel the same feeling. That missing fragment – what could it be? Nonetheless, Lay didn’t tell her. I mean, we’re not in an intimate relationship so why should I? I doubt she feels the same way anyways. Yes, Lay touches her in a gentle and harmless way, and they do hug each other in bed sometimes. However, whenever they both encounter their colleagues or companions, Roxanne would keep her distance; and when he touches or teases her, she completely loses her composure and become so unusually bashful towards him. At first, Lay thought of nothing from it, but recently, it’s been hurting him for some quite time.

     While the adolescents were obtaining conflicting feelings, the local dance team that they were in started to become known throughout the city of Seoul. The dance team’s fame even started to spread, and afterwards, they had the opportunity to go to London to perform their mini tour and feature in a vid-con and k-con. When Roxanne heard this, she felt more than excitement. She was greatly anticipating for this.

     Once the announcement was declared to the dance team, Roxanne practically dragged Lay to his apartment and tackled him to the ground for a big hug, and Lay laughed in glee when she pounced on him. They were wrestling each other for a while until Roxanne gathered enough strength to pin him down by the shoulders and straddle him. Lay gave up and laughed breathlessly, exclaiming, “Alright, alright! You win, Roxie. You win.” Roxanne’s lips curved into a victorious smile and leaned away, gathering all of her hair over her shoulder. “And, Roxanne Lee is victorious yet again,” she said in a sing-song tone and chuckled. The dark brunette chuckled, as well, but he was suddenly caught off guard by the way Roxanne looked. Her hair was over her shoulder making her hair look longer than it is. Her eyes were closed in a shape of the crescent moon on its side, and her fair lips were in a breath-taking smile letting her pearly whites gleam her already bright face. He always noticed how beautiful she was, but there are moments, when he’s really in the midst of her beauty.

     The dirty-blonde female was chuckling, but the chuckle slowly turned into a soft chortle. And when she looked down, Lay was looking up at her with an intense stare, and Roxanne was trapped into his gaze. The gentleman reached up to her, tangling his fingers in her hair, and gently pulled her close to him. The young lady softly placed her forehead against his, and at that moment, whatever was on their mind evaporated into thin air. The only entity that was on their mind was each other. It almost seemed as if their breathing became one again. You’re so beautiful. He wanted to say, but it was if her beauty took away his ability to speak. Therefore, the only thing that he could do was kiss her.

     He fondled the strands of her head and slightly tilted his leaning up close to the latter. Their eyes were still locked into contact, and there was no hesitation in either of their eyes. They moved their sight from their eyes to their lips, and Lay released his last breath before closing his eyes. He slowly let their lips meet; however, when their lips barely brushed, Roxanne was snapped back into reality and pushed Lay away. She quickly removed herself from him. Her head was hung low, hiding her shameful face from him, and the dark brunette supported himself on his elbows looking up at her. After a short silence – an excruciatingly long time for both of them, Roxanne said, “I need to go.” As she was gathering her things, she never showed her face, and she immediately left his apartment.

     Lay was dumbstruck. It was only then when the door slammed shut, he got up and tried to stop her. What the .  He swore in head, and he felt a sudden frustration in his chest. The feeling hurt, and it felt so heavy in his heart. He questioned his sanity and his being. What is he doing? What just happened? Did I do something wrong? More and more questions filled in his mind, and he couldn’t take the madness any longer. He screamed in agitation and punched the wall nearest to him leaving a hole there. He breathed heavily and ignored the stinging pain he felt on his wrist. Is it my fault? What the hell are we even doing? There’s nothing between us. He bumped his forehead against the well and pressed his hands against it as well. There’s something wrong with him, but it’s not his existence. It’s that missing piece to his existence. He slowed down his breath, and his shoulders were slumped with his back hunched over. He imagined that his forehead was pressed against hers, and in between his arms was the delicate yet strong-willed Roxanne. He could see her wrapping her arms around his neck and softly kissing his jawline to simply calm him down. He has a vivid picture of her cupping his face and leaning close to him to rub their noses together in an eskimo kiss, and that faded picture alone made him smile. The …. Maybe, there is something there between us.

     After that intense event, they hardly talked to each other. Well, the reason wasn’t because they were both avoiding each other. No, it was the fact that mid-terms were coming soon, and they had to study. At least, that’s what Roxanne tells herself. She kept herself locked in her room, burying herself with tea and books and electro house music. Right after she was done dealing with the dance studio or working at the coffee shop, she would quickly leave at once and say that she needs to study for midterms. She even comes at the last minute so that she wouldn’t be able to speak to Lay. This may seem unnecessary for her to do, but what she’s feeling isn’t unnecessary. They’re not in an intimate relationship. They’re only close friends; however, whenever Lay touches her or hugs her close to him, she couldn’t help but feel as if she wanted more. She doesn’t want more touches. No, she wanted the feeling behind his touches to mean more than just a friendly gesture. She doesn’t know if that kiss was going to be initiated through lust or through a sudden action. Roxanne doesn’t know if he has strong feelings for her, and she doesn’t even know if she has those kind of feelings for him, as well. Are they friends? Are they colleagues? Are they just two individuals, who has a small history between them? I don’t even know what we are anymore.

     The local dance team, Lay, and Roxanne finally made it to London. They all successfully roused their audience in awe, and they made them energetic through their performance. After their live show in the vid-con and k-con, people noticed them and even asked for their picture. Roxanne even had the opportunity to talk to all of the Londoners through a microphone or in person, and the whole experience felt so surreal to her. However, the atmosphere between her and Lay was still uncomfortable for each other, but when the administrator of the local dance team held for both the captain and his team a private party, they started to ease towards each other.

     All the members of the dance team danced freely and grabbed a partner to dance with. Almost everyone had a drink in their hand, especially Lay. He was watching Roxanne dancing with her female friends so freely, and he almost felt jealous that the ladies were lucky enough to confront his Roxanne’s lovely hips swaying side to side. Wait a second, since when was she mine? The dark brunette scoffed at himself and forced himself to finish all of his beer. The liquid harshly flowed down his throat letting him feel a burning sensation, and as he sighed in relief and opened his eyes, he met chocolate orbs like his. It was none other than Roxanne Lee. She gently took away his beer bottle and placed it down. Next, she held both of his hands to pull him up making him stand in front of her in a close distance. With an undeniably pretty smile on her face, she said to him, “Dance with me.” Instead of Roxanne dragging Lay to the dance floor, Lay picked her up and spun her around just in tune with the music, and Lay must have felt like the happiest man on earth when he heard Roxanne laugh in such a long time.

     As they stumbled into Lay’s separate hotel room (there was an odd number of boys in the local dance team, and by winning a drinking game, Lay got his own room), the whole situation seemed like déjà vu, but the adolescents didn’t care. They were too busy engrossing themselves in their passionate kiss, and their heavy breaths made a thick fog around their minds. The temperature was increasingly rising between them, and Lay’s hand was completely underneath Roxanne’s shirt. A soft gasping moan escaped her plump lips, and the dark brunette smirked against her lips. Being daring, Roxanne pulled on his collar for a deep and searing kiss, and they both fell against the bed with the young lady, laying against the mattress, and the gentleman, hovering over her and eagerly caressing her body.

     They pressed their foreheads together. Sweat drenched their body, and the moon shined on them, making their bare bodies illuminate in the room. Both of their breaths were uneven, but that didn’t stop them from softly kissing each other. With both their eyes closed, Lay kissed Roxanne’s forehead. He kissed the tip of her nose, her rosy cheek, the corner of her lips, and the base of her neck. The dirty-blonde female stretched her neck to give him room, and Lay nuzzled his nose against her neck breathing in the scent of lavender and black tea with a mixture of beer. The gentleman breathed wrapping one arm around the latter’s waist, and his free hand tangled its fingers in her dirty-blonde locks. “Roxie,” Lay said in a deep and husky voice, indicating that he’s tired.

     “Yea?” Roxanne asked, placing her arms around his back and looking up at the ceiling.

     “I – You’re so beautiful. And I... just wanted to let you know that.” In that instant, Roxanne’s heart skipped a beat, twisted, or leaped away from her chest. However one can describe such a feeling, she felt it, and she couldn’t keep herself from smiling. But what if he only said that because of the situation now? What if it’s only by a whim that he just realized this? He never did complimented her like that. Insecurity, man’s worst enemy, filled in her mind, and her smile turned into parted lips as if Insecurity was drawing her happiness away from . When Lay looked up at her, she looked down at him, and he asked her, “Are you going to stay the night?”

     She wanted to say yes, but her lips moved quicker than her mind and replied,

     “No.”