Chapter III

“Isn’t is funny how we live

Inside the lies we believe?” A.S King

It was time to disappear again, to stick the luggage inside the trunk of his car, close the door of that house that felt anything but his for Seunghyun and to look around for an instant at the neighborhood he lived in with the feeling of not belonging there. He saw the 10 year old girl riding her bicycle along the street waving one of her hands to him and the old man sitting over a chair looking absent at the distance. ¿How does it feel to belong somewhere? He had no idea.

After explaining, more like lying to the lady that lived next to him about his departure for another long business trip and asking her to look after his house, then giving her some money to take care of the bills and after dealing with her warm smile and her undeserved blessings, Seunghyun drove along Seoul’s streets to his now new home: Jiyong’s house.

The neighborhood was, when he arrived, the same as the day before; deserted and covered with some kind of thick fog that gave the place a weird, ghostly vibe; similarly the house seemed as empty as before.

He was welcomed by Kwon Jiyong leaning on the main door’s frame, arms crossed and an expressionless face with matching cold eyes that were looking straight at him. The man was still wearing his pajamas and only a red housecoat that protected him from the cold wind of that winter’s morning. “I wasn’t expecting you this early,” he said looking at the small luggage Seunghyun was carrying over his shoulder.

“The early, the better. Traffic will be worse later,” Seunghyun explained, entering the house behind Jiyong.

He was surprised to see the couches now differently arranged, facing  the opposite side of the window with no sign of any of the bear bricks he saw the day before. As small as they might appear, those changes strangely increased the empty sensation inside the house. Seunghyun looked hurriedly at the walls and felt an unexplainable relief after watching all the portrait paintings still hanging over them.

Jiyong led him through the house to the second floor. The second male followed him in silence looking curiously yet subtly around him, as if somehow he felt prohibited to look at the empty rooms and furniture or rather as if he felt not really wanted there. But then, why was he there? He shook off the silly thought.

“That’s your room,” pointed Jiyong finally at one of the rooms at the left. “That’s mine,” he added pointing at the following one.

Seunghyun nodded silently, feeling tired as well as intimidated, so he just kept expecting Jiyong to continue speaking. The latter frowned and sighed at the lack of proper response before opening his mouth again to say something.

“You can do everything you need in your room since I thought we both need some privacy… but you’ll sleep with me. I mean… whenever I ask you to… yes… that’s all," He stuttered losing his cool aura for a moment after which he turned and began to walk away, apparently ashamed. Yet he had not even taken two steps away when he looked back again and said with an indecipherable stare, “Not with you, with Seunghyun. I will sleep with my Seunghyun,” after which he walked inside his room and closed the door firmly.

Lee Seunghyun stayed still, feeling a sort of sickening feeling when repeating every word Jiyong said inside his head; they were meant to be cruel, were meant to hurt him. Though he wasn’t sure anymore, Jiyong started to seem to him not as innocent as he had once thought.

His assigned room was comfortable, as comfortable as a house that screamed solitude could be; but nevertheless solitude was already something he was accustomed to for he had never been attached to anything or anyone. That room was his home, temporal but still his so he let his body fall onto the bed and stared at the ceiling in contemplation.

“He doesn’t want me here,“ he affirmed in loud voice, recalling those cold eyes focused on him, “He doesn’t want me here and still I am here, why? ... I am the one doing him a favor,” he grumbled before slowly falling asleep even though he had just woken up a couple hours prior.

Some minutes or hours later, Seunghyun did not know for sure, he opened his eyes to a room completely lit by powerful sunbeams that entered through the window. Stretching his arms, he listened carefully, trying to find any sound that could tell him where the primary inhabitant of the house was or what he could be doing. But the same violent silence was all he could hear.

Opening his room’s door with a hushed creak and stepping outside, he searched with careful eyes in attempt to find Jiyong's figure at every  possible corner but it seemed as if he was the only one there. He glanced once towards Jiyong’s bedroom, with it's door shut, but shook his head in disagreement to the thought of opening it. So he just walked down the stairs to the first floor while dragging his feet.

Along the stairs, posted on the wall were several photos that had gone unnoticed before by him. They were from trips, there were unknown people hugging or laughing with Jiyong in many different occasions and places but his attention was drawn rather to that particular smile over Jiyong’s face; it was a beautiful smile, a Jiyong extremely different to the one he knew; he seemed innocent and even tender. Then he noticed some pictures where Choi Seunghyun was next to him, placing an arm over his shoulders or around his waist affectionately. They looked so happy; Seunghyun could do nothing but feel pity for Jiyong.

He did not know how it felt to lose someone you cherished, for he never had someone to cherish to start with, but he had worked as a supplanter for a long time now to be able to see how the pain made those once joyful souls turn into something completely different, which hinted at him what if must feel like. It was as if the vivacity was drowned from those souls and all that was left was the remnants of a person, so he at least believed it was something extremely difficult and something he did not wish for anyone to experience.

“Jiyong?” he asked one last time without an answer before looking at a piece of paper placed over the dining room’s table.

“At work, will return at 8:00 pm. There’s food in the fridge or if you want, you can go out until I return. Kwon Jiyong”

He looked at the little letter quite confusedly as well as baffled, and let his body fall onto one of the chairs. First thing; he was alone in the house. Second thing; Did Jiyong just let him stay alone in the house?

“What’s wrong with this guy?” he wondered, running one of his hands over his hair without knowing what to do. He frowned, becoming extremely annoyed. Yes, he had nothing to do for more than, he checked at his wristwatch, six hours. After thinking for a while he decided to explore the house without disruption. Jiyong was not there so he felt more free and less restrained to see everything and maybe find some answers to at least some of his questions. After wandering  and being lost for about ten minutes while looking at the garden’s doors and all the not so interesting places, he entered into a little, softly lit room where there were books placed over the many shelves on the walls. This might be their library, thought Seunghyun while staring at the books, which were organized not only by sizes, but authors and themes in an extremely tidy manner.

There was a desk in the far distance, in front of the little overture in the wall that served as a window. And next to it, there was a blackboard with many newspaper pieces and cuttings pasted all over it. Seunghyun got closer and took hold of one of them before reading its content after which he stared at the rest of the papers, quite surprised at his findings. In most of them there was a photo of Choi Seunghyun under a diversity of headlines.

Choi Co. between the 30 best enterprises of the year.

2012, A good year for Korean entrepreneurs.

Best CEO’s of the year. Choi Seunghyun from Choi Co.

Choi-Kwon; a powerful alliance. What is behind their relationship?

Lee Seunghyun read one after another with growing interest until he ended up sitting on the chair’s desk with a lot of disorganized papers in front of him and a confused grin over his face.

There were papers of every single thing Choi Seunghyun had done, from the founding of his enterprise to his death, what made impossible for this collection to be done by Choi Seunghyun itself. He looked at the blackboard, intrigued. Just one person could have done this. “What were you looking for Jiyong?” he asked himself.

He took out one white piece of paper and a pen and started writing notes he thought to be important.

Choi Seunghyun Got his CEO position at the age of 23.

First and only son of the former CEO of Choi Co.

Had connections with enterprises in China, Taiwan, Honk Kong and New Zealand.

Made his relationship with the composer, Kwon Jiyong, public in 2010 .

Murdered on the 2nd of July, 2014 during his visit to one of his department stores. He and one of his bodyguard were killed, the other one condition unknown

Unknown motto, supposed failed assault attempt.

Kwon Jiyong has not made any declaration till then and has remained away and disappeared for 6 months.

Seunghyun looked at those notes and realized he had now more doubts than answers and that he was getting quite too much captivated by the mystery around this case. Still something was telling him to stay away from it. He tried to leave everything in the room as how he had found it originally and closed the door of the library with only a piece of paper folded inside his pocket.

He went to the kitchen searching for something edible inside the fridge and sat at the table alone, with a bowl of rice and a plate of greens.

“Seunghyun?” answered Daesung at the other side of the line with his particular nervous voice.

“Mmm… just calling you to inform you that I’m already here in Kwon Jiyong’s house,” he said sighing and sticking the chopsticks into the rice.

“Is everything ok, Hyun?” asked Daesung trying to find some kind of relief to his nervousness as he was indeed worried about Seunghyun.

“Boooriing,” said Seunghyun with his mouth stuffed with food. “What the hell is this Dae? Why am I here?” He asked, annoyed and exasperated to have no visible answers.

There was a moment of silence, in which Seunghyun supposed Daesung was thinking what to say or how to answer, meaning he was a same as lost as him.

“Look, I don’t know. It is weird, I know, but it won’t last long…”

“It won’t last long!” Seunghyun interrupted Daesung over the line, “One probable ing year is not long for you?” he asked, raising the tone of his voice.

“I know, I know… just be careful, neh, Seunghyun? If you do your best this can end soon… just take care,” said Daesung with an evident tiresome tone in his voice.

“Can you help me find more info about this case, Dae?” Seunghyun asked suddenly, already knowing the answer but still not letting the opportunity go away.

“No, and stay away from those things. You don’t need to know those things. Don’t get involved, you know the rules Seunghyun,” replied Daesung rudely, as if he was trying to make the importance of him staying away from it clear with that attitude.

Seunghyun sighed, becoming resigned as he hung up the phone way more upset than before. He stared at the portraits over the living’s room wall, at the distorted faces. When had his face started to be like those faces, like a distorted face? He was sure it wasn’t something he had chosen, but this life had chosen for him instead, he had neither chances nor any choice but to live this way since the start. However, now he was starting to feel a strange interest to know how does it felt to belong or how does it felt to be important for someone. The knowledge of not having anyone waiting for him, looking for him was starting to become more apparent and painful everyday. Was it because of the fact he was getting older? Or something else? What was happening with him?

The only thing he surely had as his was a bunch of songs he heard during his infancy, when living the kind of sickening life he had to live. He used to sing those songs as a reminder of the things he never had and the things he never knew. 

Jiyong arrived at the house at 8:30 pm and was received by a place submerged in darkness with no signs of inhabitance. Maybe he had not yet returned… the man thought but the sight of the empty house in front of him only made his hands tighten around the steering wheel and his teeth to clench. He couldn’t understand why, but he was scared to enter the house. Was it the fact he was not going to find anyone inside?

He slowly walked through the front garden and took a deep breath before opening the door. He still could not see anything, yet before the loneliness could reach him with its particular violence it was halted when the sound of someone singing at the back of the house was heard. He walked towards it, fascinated by the voice, squinting his eyes as he tried hard not to run into something in the dark.

There was a figure at the middle of the back garden, he could only see the silhouette of his back but his heartbeat fastened with excitment. Yes, he was indeed becoming crazy. Yes, he was indeed out of his mind. But his feet moved by their own will towards that man and his arms circled that man’s waist with violent longing. Yes, he was indeed crazy and he did not care. He fought against his mind for he needed this to feel alive again.

“You came early,” he whispered, caressing the back of the man with his own face. The back of someone that remained tense and silent, too shocked to know what to do.

“How was your day?” asked Jiyong again with a new voice, one Seunghyun hadn’t hear before.

He was consciously aware that he had to do something but could not find any idea as to what to do. The strength of Jiyong’s arms around his waist, the enormous longing he could feel in the way he was hugging him made it so difficult. The depth of Jiyong’s feelings made him feel dirty and a liar.

“It is ok. I missed you,” he answered after a moment, moving his hands and hesitantly caressing those pale hands around his waist. He locked his feelings inside his chest and did his job; he had to do his job, “I missed you, Jiyong-ah.”

Behind him, Jiyong was lost in his own blindness, the one made of desire and longing whilst he felt the man caress his hands with familar tenderness. The presence of the man alone made him feel protected and relieved. His Choi Seunghyun was with him, and that was all that mattered.

An itching feeling at the back of the supplanter's head chanted that this was not real, that their actions were all delusions as the two males lead one another back in the confines of the house, both too lost in a heated embrace to notice the darkness any longer. Yet even as he managed to subside it a bit, the feeling throbbed and swam around uncomfortably in the depth of his mind; this was not real and their actions were all delusions.

Little did he know that similar thoughts echoed in the latter's head just as loudly.

Hi there! JessRa has returned LOL =) No but really I'm "semiback", which means I'll not let many time pass between chapters (Please accept my apologies).

Now things will start to go complicated and creepy between Ri & Ji . Yes..!!! o.0? Please stay with me and look forward for the new chapters.

Love you all! And thanks for your comments! I really like reading your opinions. See ya soon!