Secrets, secrets!! This chapter was exciting even for me. ^^

Chapter XIX

If freckles were lovely, and day was night, 
And measles were nice and a lie warn't a lie, 
Life would be delight,-- 
But things couldn't go right 
For in such a sad plight 
I wouldn't be I.

If earth was heaven and now was hence, 
And past was present, and false was true, 
There might be some sense 
But I'd be in suspense 
For on such a pretense 
You wouldn't be you.

If fear was plucky, and globes were square, 
And dirt was cleanly and tears were glee 
Things would seem fair,-- 
Yet they'd all despair, 
For if here was there 
We wouldn't be we.”

E.E s 
 

The place Youngbae chose to see one other was different from the usual places they used for those kinds of meetings. The record store was one of the more popular ones in the city and was well-known for been divided in two sections: one where the albums were exhibited and placed neatly in eye-catching racks that almost stretched from the floor to the ceiling and another one which was used as a cafeteria with minimalistic-style tables and lots of teenagers chatting with each other while listening to the popular new released albums. Young boys and girls that made Seungri feel self conscious of his not-so-young age. He already had abandoned that stage of his life for another one of a “mature” young adult, not so sure about where he was going, but still an adult. He spotted Youngbae’s mohawk behind one of the racks and walked towards his direction, trying to remain unnoticed.

Youngbae was holding a tablet in one of his hands and with the other one he copied things and numbers from the tags pasted in the racks. From time to time he grabbed one of the albums, read something at the back cover and placed it back in silence, nodding or shaking his head accordingly to what he read. They stood there in such a strange dynamic despite the fact Youngbae had already noticed his presence and had smiled as only greeting and then continued with his task or whatever what he was doing could be called.

“This artist,” Youngbae broke the silence after a while, signaling at one of the albums at one of the racks, one with a gray cover and the picture of a woman in her middle twenties with a black mask covering her face and red lips standing out from the whole image. “It’s been such a surprise the success of her album for our company. You should see them when they get first place in music rankings. The satisfaction in their eyes is satisfying for us too, as producers,” he said and took the album and gave it to Seungri as if he was forcing him to buy it and listen to it. “Artists… they are as -without any intention to offend you- are like orphan kids. You catch it? With the expectation to find the right family, the one that can help them grow successfully. At least that’s how Jiyong and me see the music business.”

“Since when are you into this?” asked Seungri, whilst reading the name of the songs of the album now in his hands.

Youngbae looked absently at one of the racks trying to remember the exact dates. “After college. Ah! I can’t remember the exact moment… We started our little enterprise as it was expected. I mean… I knew about business managing and he knew ‘bout music. You can say we’re lucky enough. Quickly, we learned. It was ride or die as Jiyong uses to say.”

Seungri thought about the word “lucky” and what it meant for him. At times he wondered, just in curiosity, what could have been of him if he had met the right family? What would be of him? How would his life look like by now? And Youngbae aware of what his thoughts could be, approached to him and patted his back understandingly.

“Let me tell you. Just a little percentage of the artists get to met the right company or “family”,” he said, imitating quotation marks with his fingers. “Some as Jiyong never find it, so they make their own. Which reminds me…” he added drawing a mischievous expression over his face, “… I had a really strange morning,”

Seungri averted his eyes instantly embarrassed and feeling his cheeks blushing intensely. What could he say?

“We… Jiyong… well we kind of…” Seungri started trying to explain between stutters but Youngbae shook his hands and made him stop with a loud laugh that draw the attention of a group of teenagers close from where they were, what only helped to boost Seungri’s embarrassment.

“I don’t want to know, believe me!” Youngbae strongly affirmed, lifting his eyebrows.

“I’m happy,” Seungri finally let out as only comment and let out a deep sigh. “And afraid,” he wanted to add but preferred to hush those ideas and waited for them to disappear at being ignored.

Youngbae assented smiling as if saying, “I bet you are” and bent down to open his suitcase, which was left carelessly over the floor. He searched for something for some minutes until taking out a little USB with a blue strap and handed it to Seungri with a satisfied smirk.

“I think this will be of your interest,” he assumed. “Those are the only songs Jiyong has recorded with his own voice. He always composes and produces for other artists but never for him. That brat! Those songs were written and recorded days after Seunghyun’s death and I think, yeah, you should hear them and maybe help me to convince him to make them public?”

Seunghyun took the USB with fascination and with the feeling of not deserving such a gift and privilege he mumbled an unintelligible “Thank you” and studied for a long time the USB between his fingers with curiosity rooting inside his stomach. A curiosity that became so strong for a moment that he suddenly wanted to escape from the store as fast as possible to be able to listen to those songs, though Youngbae was smart enough and made him regain consciousness of why was he there in the first place.

“Now,” Youngbae started, taking out a pair of documents from his suitcase, “I investigated what you asked me for. But, to be sincere, what I found only helped me get more confused,”

“Soo Hyuk's accounts?”

Youngbae nodded and showed him the documents. “It took me a while to convince Chaerin to help me. That girl is some serious business!” he hissed. “Anyway… she finally was able to hack into Soo Hyuk records. The money he’s been sending to the back guard in name of Choi E. is, ironically, not from the company. It’s something as a cover up.”

Seunghyun lifted his gaze surprised while Youngbae took a deep breath and continued accounting his research.

“I found no signals of diversion of money or withdrawals from the official accounts. In fact, I found quite the opposite; each month there’s extra money appearing in the bills without any explanation, it stays for around one day or two and then disappears. Like that! Just it is as if it was never there! So I took the liberty to investigate where that extra money came from, and well, it comes from Hyuang Enterprise via a Chinese mediator. It’s as if the Hyuangs where the ones paying Soo Hyuk to pay for the back guard’s silence… strange, isn’t it?”

“It makes sense,” Seungri thought aloud, frowning and concentrated on processing and linking the new information with what they already knew. “It does make sense, the Hyuangs…”

At that moment a group of girls walked through the aisle, interrupting them with their loud voices and throwing pieces of paper to each other. Youngbae and Seungri tried to casually pretend they were looking for an album until the girls disappeared at the other extreme of the corridor. Seunghyun breathed deeply, checked his surroundings one more time and then approached towards Youngbae, so close his lips were almost brushing his ear.

“The Hyuangs were the ones who killed Choi Seunghyun,”

Youngbae backed off instantly with disbelief in his eyes. Seungri then explained what he had heard from the back guard nights ago and how he had made him confess all those things and information. At the end Youngbae shook his head still unbelieving.

“But, but, didn’t you show me a photo of Seunghyun with the daughter of the Hyuangs? It has no sense.”

“It makes sense. A lot of sense! They knew each other, which we know for sure. They had –The Choi’s and the Hyuang’s- a close relationship. Something went wrong along that line. Something that pushed them even to commit murder,”

Youngbae rubbed his hand across the bridge of his nose and focused on his thoughts. He had never heard once about the Hyuangs before Choi Seunghyun’s murder, and it was not until they had started the whole investigation when the name had been disclosed. Jiyong knew nothing about them, too. Seungri had found Choi Seunghyun’s account registers and the name of the Hyuangs appeared there. There were no official records about any relationship between both companies. Where could they find any information then?  And suddenly he looked at Seungri with enlightened eyes.

“Choi’s lawyer! The personal one. He may have something -I mean- know something. Is just that he won’t speak for free,”

“Can you convince him?” asked Seungri thrilled. “This time though Jiyong has to be there and listen at what this lawyer has to say. Is time for him to have some answers, to be part of this.”

“I can try… The man is driven by money. I once advised the Choi’s he was not trustworthy but they told me to mind my own business. Who could have guess, huh?” Youngbae chuckled, shaking his head impressed at how twisted life could be and how one could be found at the other extreme of the equation when less expected. Life was, indeed, a complicated thing.

“I don’t have much but I have some savings…” Seungri suggested but Youngbae shook his head fiercely interrupting him.

“Jiyong has to participate somewhere, right?” he said smiling and saved the documents again inside his suitcase and took out his tablet. “Now help me finish this before the store is closed.”

Seungri left the record store twenty minutes after seven o’clock, with three new messages from Jiyong asking him where he was in different styles that ran from cute to angered, a great headache and seventy names of artists under KJ Entertainment management now buried in his memory. He sighed and leaned his head onto the driver’s seat of his car before he stared at the USB for a moment until deciding to plug it in. He chose the largest route to Jiyong’s house, as he wanted to listen to those songs more than once.

I see you the last time

You’re still pretty, prettier

When I look at you

Listening to Jiyong’s voice in such a new way was thrilling and spine chilling. He understood why it was so hard for Jiyong to accept those songs to be publicized. There was too much of him in those songs, they were so emotionally sincere and it was understandable he felt afraid of letting people know him so closely. Also there was this sad tone, in every single note, that melancholic vein in everything Jiyong did.

This might be the last time we say goodbye

This might be the last time we say goodnight

Baby slow down my whole body is shaking

On a sunny day, it suddenly rains on this window

Rainy window, rainy window

The window that knows the secret of this silent night

It was noticeable the song spoke about his pain of losing someone he loved, of saying his farewells to him. About his guilt and his fear of being left alone. But, maybe, it was he the one who was able to relate those words to the real Jiyong. As if he could point what verse was related with what event or emotional break down of Jiyong. He had seen them. Now that he reflected about it, he was the only one who had seen them and that truth shook his bones.

His phone ringing interrupted the song and his trance. A new message from Jiyong arrived but this time there was an address written and indications of how to get there. Seungri could not recall any known place at that north side of the city. Private houses and middle class condominiums where the only thing he knew was there. Curious, Seungri turned back at the first return and drove there with blind trust.

His answer came ten minutes later when he stopped his car in front of a white house. Jiyong’s car was parked at the other side of the street in front of another smaller red car. At the façade of the house was written an elegant number 35 and there were white and yellow flowers scattered all along the grass of the front garden.

Seungri stepped out of his car and walked towards Jiyong’s one but stopped midways when he noticed it was empty. So he had no other choice but to walk to the house’s front door and knock two times hesitantly. An old woman opened the door one minute later and looked at him with interested eyes and studied him for longer than usual until she smiled and welcomed him politely.

“Welcome, Jiyong is already at the living room,”

Seungri bowed respectfully but bewildered, and walked though the corridor staring at the framed photos pasted over the walls to have some clues of whose house was it. There were photos of a family with two little girls, and of two young girls holding each other hands and shoulders in different places and landscapes. When he reached the living room, Jiyong was sitting cross-legged at one of the sofas; he smiled at him shyly and invited him to sit next to where he was. 

“Seungri, She is Mr. Hee Young,” he introduced the lady.

Seungri bowed again and introduced himself still confused as of what was happening.

“Look at you,” the woman said, again studying him with great interest. She offered him a cup of tea and sat in front of them. “This boy contacted me one week ago,” she explained pointing at Jiyong who hid his face behind his cup of tea. “I saw that you were interested in the photos at the corridor. They are from my sister and me when we were younger,”

“You look happy,” Seungri murmured and side-eyed at Jiyong expecting for explanations. Jiyong noticed it and nodded with his head, straightened his back and twisted his hands with uneasiness.

“I’m not sure about this. I thought it was a good idea but now it’s very awkward. Please don’t…. I tried to find your mother’s family,” Jiyong ended blurting out and lowered his head, uncertain.

Seungri widened his eyes and turned his head to see the lady in front of them who was looking at him with a mix of sadness and affection.

“My mother?”

“She was my little sister,” the women completed the sentence for him and got off the couch, removed one of the framed photos from the corridor wall and gave it to Seungri, who took it with trembling hands. It was the photo of a young woman with dark hair and pale skin. There was no doubt, it was as seeing his own reflection.

“My mom?” stuttered Seungri with his eyes attached on the picture with shaky voice. “H-how? Why did you…?” he tried to ask something but every possible question got mixed and confused in his mind. Finally he only lifted his watery eyes and stared at Jiyong and the old lady asking for something: be it help, answers or a simple comforting hand.

Jiyong automatically interlaced his fingers with Seungri’s ones and slid one of his arms around his shoulders with worry printed in his face. At the end he was the one responsible to make Seungri face such hard reality unprepared.

“I only knew about you this week, and only thanks to the boy at your side,” said the lady apologetic, his hands tightened over her dress lap. “Haeyon, your mother, she left our house very young and married a construction worker. My parents never forgave her for staining our family’s name and reputation. Our father was… a hard man to deal with and Haeyon was free spirited, always with hope over anything else. My father forced me to leave Korea and study abroad in an attempt to avoid the same story to repeat with me. I came back to Korea when I knew about my sister’s death. And it seems my father, even then, was more interested in keeping our family’s reputation as clean as possible than saying the truth to his own daughter. I never knew my dear sister had been pregnant or that she had left a kid out there, alone. I’m so sorry Seunghyun. If only I had been more insistent as Haeyon was or tried to keep in touch with her, knew about her problems or life.”

“How d-did you find her?” Seungri cried out looking at Jiyong, incapable of believing all of what was happening.

“Daesung helped me,”

All the sudden information, secrets for they where secrets in his life and he was already accustomed to not knowing them. He had given up long time ago, but now, all of it was there and he found no way of how all of that could settle in his head. How knowing his mother’s face, his mother’s story and innocence, his mother’s family which he already thought he would never know, all of it how could he make it make sense, find a space in his heart. He lingered in silent, studying the face of the one who was his mom: the same eyes, the same lips and the same smile as his.

At the end the woman approached to him and took his wrist signaling him to follow her. Seungri got off the couch absently and walked behind her to the back garden. Jiyong walked next to him, biting his nails probably regretting his decision. At the back part of the garden was a small construction with white pillars and small decorations. There where prettier flowers adorning the entrance which make it appear as an altar.

“At least my father had the decency to bury her in our family burial place,” explained the lady pointing at the altar. “Your friend wanted to find your mother’s resting place and he ended up finding more.”

Seungri looked at the construction and the thought of his mother’s memory being there was too much for him. He fell on his knees and tried to steady his own emotions. Jiyong kneeled next to him apologizing between gasps. Though Seungri could not understand why was he apologizing for, it all felt as if a weight had been lifted from his body. All those things he wanted to know and had punished him when younger now he finally knew, and though he still did not find what to do with them, it felt right, it was what he secretly had wished for all those years, a sense of identity.

The woman left them alone for a long time at the garden. Seungri wasted all the time whining and crying out his frustrations and childish fears and Jiyong now was the one holding him and listening at him in silence, only caressing his back. Finally Seungri lifted his eyes and stared at Jiyong and placed one of his hands over one of Jiyong’s shaky hand.

“You found my mom,” he murmured, smiling between tears. “Now I do have a mom. A real one,”

After a while they returned inside the house where the lady was waiting for them now with a pile of books placed on the center table and the framed photo she had gave him before.

“You can keep the photo,” she said smiling. “Also… I found these years ago. Your mother use to love writing journals and she never stopped, not even when she left the house. I guess you want to know more about her. Those are yours to have,”

Seungri stared at the books cautiously, almost with fear. The lady understood Seungri’s reaction towards those journals and added.

“You don’t have to worry. I would not be giving them to you if I weren’t sure the words in there are something you have to know. She loved you, dear, even if she had not the opportunity to meet you face to face. She writes really beautifully about you.”

They finally left the house with the promise of coming back to visit her once in while and books pressed over Seungri’s chest. He felt so disturbed to be able to drive by his own so he decided to left his car there and leave with Jiyong’s car, who kept glancing at him with guilt during all the way back home. When they arrived, Jiyong hit the breaks, stopped the engines, sighed and turned to face Seungri while one of his hands messed his own hair anxiously.

“Say something Ri, I’m sorry if it was too much. I just,” he gulped and messed his hair again, “…wanted to, give this to you, but I’m not sure anymore. Are you ok?”

Seungri detached his eyes from the windshield and inhaled for a while until answering.

“I think you broke me, Jiyong. No matter how much I’ve been prohibiting myself to break down, you just did it and I… I didn’t even had the strength to resist.”

Jiyong bit his lower lip and hesitantly tried to grab Seungri’s hand. “Is that something bad? Did I make a mistake?” but pulled his hand away again as if scared he wasn’t allowed to touch Seungri, but Seungri caught it and draw a weak smile.

“No. It feels right.”

A relieved sigh escaped from Jiyong’s lips and he leaned his head over Seungri’s shoulder. “We are the most dramatic couple I’ve ever known,” he whispered amused while playing with Seungri’s fingers. “It’s interesting. How can sadness be used to strengthen someone’s love? Seungri…” he exclaimed lifting his eyes to stare at Seungri’s ones. “What can I do for you?”

“Silly,” Seungri murmured shushing Jiyong with a kiss. “You are silly,” he repeated with tears rolling down his eyes though he felt overjoyed, content. He drew kisses through Jiyong’s face making him writhe and giggle at the ticklish touches. “Be always silly, Jiyong.”

The next evening Youngbae achieved to persuade Choi’s personal lawyer to met them at KJ Entertainment central offices. However, Youngbae had his own questions prepared as Jiyong had his own too and for that reason, when the lawyer arrived with his black suit and arrogant gait and sat in front of them staring at them for questions both blurted out different things, making the lawyer raise one of his eyebrows insolently. At the end Jiyong let Youngbae ask the questions, who only indicated the lawyer to speak about all what he knew about Choi’s relationship with the Hyuangs. The lawyer agreed but remained silent until Youngbae passed him a blank check, which he filled with the amount he expected to receive. Jiyong glanced at the amount and shrugged without care.

“One year ago the Choi’s and the Hyuang’s started meeting each other for a partnership,” the lawyer went on. “The main purpose was to introduce Choi’s E. to Chinese territory. The original plan was only meant to extend Choi’s E. marketplace with help of a local recognized enterprise. The problem was that during the year of their meetings Choi E. lost a 29% of his market value and it put in a dangerous situation the partnership and all the already settled plan. Seunghyun’s father decided then that the company and the project could be saved if they find a way to join both enterprises for the Hyuang’s market value was incrementing exponentially. So as cliché as it might sound they reached the decision of an arranged marriage between Choi Seunghyun and Meuhui Hyuang, a recognized marriage where they could split Choi E. stocks between both surnames,”

“A subtle way for the Hyuang’s to gain half the ownership of Choi. E, but remain compromised by the marriage arrangement. So it was a safe move for both parties,” added Youngbae to which the lawyer nodded.

“The problem was him,” he said pointing at Jiyong who was dead silent looking at both with lost eyes. “There were lots of scary solutions discussed over Choi Seunghyun’s desk. Some even talked about getting rid of you, divorce, killing you. Even though you are not legally recognized as Choi Seunghyun’s husband in Korea, your possession of the 35% of the stocks of the company is legally real. So even when they tried to break your marriage there was no way to take those away from you. Hyuang’s grew tired and less patient by each talk and their suggestions were getting extremely violent against you. I won’t lie; it was a stressful time for Choi Seunghyun. Listening to both parties demanding him to do something while at the same time he was trying to save your relationship and keep your trust.”

“Finally he called me one night and asked to meet me. He was desperate. When he arrived he told me he had been searching for ways to fix the mess, to find a way to put you out of danger. I told him to ask you for the stocks, that you surely would give them away if necessary but he shook his head and told me those where the only thing keeping your relationship alive, that without them he had no excuse to not marry the girl and leave you. He was a complete mess asking for help. So, I suggested him something. It was radical but it could help. That night he slept in my living room. I still remember his pronounced dark-bags under his eyes… Poor man.”

Jiyong was listening, absorbed by the lawyer’s voice. Explanations, how sly they were to find ways to camouflage themselves and pretend they are not there. And it is not until they are forced to show themselves when you understand how painful their real faces are.

“Two days later a document was signed between both families where the 42% of Seunghyun’s ownership shares and your 35% that was no longer yours, would be split between the companies.”

“It means almost 40% of Choi. E stocks are now owned by the Hyuangs? How is that possible? Jiyong is legally the owner of 77% of Choi. E stocks!” exclaimed Youngbae flustered by the news. But the lawyer shook his head and signaled Youngbae to wait until he finished his explanation.

“But what Seunghyun and I did that night was the opposite thing. The document that was signed by both families had no legal power. I still can’t understand how Hyuang’s lawyers weren’t smart enough to notice all the flaws the document had, all the legal lagoons. Two days before, Seunghyun had surrendered all his ownership shares to Jiyong, making him the majority owner of Choi. E. No one nor the Choi’s or the Hyuangs could do anything then to take those shares from him. And any project of marriage now had no purpose or sense, as Seunghyun now possessed anything. At the end the Hyuangs backed off, they were furious as same as Choi Seunghyun’s parents but Seunghyun had made the decision and it was already done.”

“But then two months later he was killed and everything pointed at you. Why was he killed when you had just gained the majority ownership of his firma? Wasn’t it too much a coincidence? So his parents and even the police took you as the principal suspect. You had reasons and all the circumstances pointed at you,”

Jiyong tightened his lips and shook his head. “But, but I never knew when he did it. I knew about those movements until he was dead, when everyone pointed at me and called me a money-digger. I don’t even recall signing something! I still don’t know how it happened! I didn’t kill him!”

The lawyer stared at him for a moment, studying him and then slurred, “Everything tells the opposite”. But Youngbae’s fist hitting the table interrupted the lawyer’s accusations and he exclaimed without even reconsidering what was he going to say.

“Do the Choi’s know it was the Hyuangs who killed Choi Seunghyun?”

And it was not until both Jiyong and the lawyer’s widened eyes stared at him shocked when he acknowledge the bomb he had just thrown to their faces.

“What?” 

Uh, Oh! Someone spilled the beans. ^^ Thank you so much for your continuous support! Really thank you. Also I'm really grateful fo your sincere comments and suggestions, I appreciate every one of them.

Big fat thanks to my new susbcribers: kunspem, ForagingReader, lovecreep, seesawmi, takiyumi, afhrida, jamie90, kyumin_fanny, Janigirl, shokingpink. 

And big fat thank you to kunspem and daerii for your upvotes.

And another big fat thank you to my readers who always leave a comment. I ADORE you!. ^^ Big aplauses to you. 

Oh! BTW The song is Window by Jiyong! You have to listen to it! ^^