Right now 

right this second 

im crying 

i dont really know why

my realisation that im growing up

my sch work

you?

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ i miss you

i miss what you represent to me

a target

a challenge 

a reason to never give up

you were hope

you were dreams 

you were the reason i came to sch

it hurts that youre not here

that i have no idea where you are what youre doing

that im still crying about you till this day.....

its scary to think that ill forever be alone

i never felt it was possible till now 

how alone i am

i love ....... what you represent 

you were never mine 

you'll never be mine

ive accepted that 

thank you for being there 

being a memory i love to recall

to cleanse myself 

to know i have emotions

because i numb myself and i do it well

which is also scary 

i thought ill never come back to this page 

but i did 

because of you 

Thank you.