December, first

Baekhyun touched the back of his neck for the nth time because with his new haircut it was weird having it exposed. One, two, three, he made a rhythm with his foot which wrapped in worn out Chuck Taylor. Too bad, there was no music playing today. The piano on the corner of the room was covered in white sheet, as white as the paper in front of him despite the black, somehow ugly, two letters he had written an hour ago.

Baekhyun glanced on the clock, a few meters from where he sat; it made him thirsty. One, two, three, he hated the counts. It was almost three in the morning, he smiled. Suddenly he remembered where he was last year. Vividly he conjured the feeling of Suzy’s skin and the taste of her soul when she whispered to him everything he needed to hear all night long. If he opened his phone right now he would see her morning face smiling on his screen. He was glad that he had left it.

Baekhyun grabbed the cold pen beside his paper on the table and dirtied the white paper with another ugly mark.

I love you. l love you. I ing love you.

The first time he told her was two years ago. She was a freshman and he was already a sad man with fingers and voice that could create a beautiful melody from a rotten heart. He thought about Suzy. One, two, three; his heart beat. It was cold but today he remembered that it was once warm.

He grabbed a cup with his other hand, inside was a dark coffee mixed with his bitter soul. He gulped it down to the last sip of it. He wrote the last line.

Suzy, I am sorry for that.

One, two, three, it was only the clock.