“It's just, a special person has entered my life.”

In a flash of a second, the face once filled with distrust and timidity, transformed into an illuminating smile and glistening eyes that anitcipated to be seen. His heart felt buoyant to have finally let out the feeling that lived in there, concealed from the rest of the world, more onerous with each minute and day as it dominated over his mind and soul. Something that made his heart pound everytime those radiant eyes glanced at him in that gullible way, eyes of a person that desired company and protection. MinSeok wanted to be that protection and the company, he devoted himself to grant it.

“Really? How long have you been together for?” As the words reached KyungSoo vigilant ears, his brightened up, knowing that he had a shoulder to lean on; MinSeok wavered.

“We're not together. He's just a friend.” The ambience tottered, discomfort came as his smile was tattered slowly into the thin air surrounding them, that expeditiously became arduous to breathe in. They remained in stilness until the ice had to broken again.

“Hyung, don't you be worrying like that.” The youngest one clutched onto his broad shoulder, guilt displaying on his innocent face, struggling to comfort his friend. “I'm sure that he likes you too. Who wouldn't? But you know what? He has to know you like him too, not everyone is as perceptive. Don't be like that and tell him, you won't regret it.” MinSeok sensed his heart racing a little too rapidly at those words, indubitably persuaded and touched bu the undoubtfully true words. Keeping it all in decidedly haven't made it less perplexing. Everyday, he watched the boy with infatuated eyes and wished he noticed the gleam on his face whenever he smiles, speaks or just is. Yet, he never did anything to make him see.

“It's easy to say, but if he doesn't feel the same way? I'm panicking.” Face plunged in the jittery hands, an exhale, eyes closed in frustration at his own ludicrous demeanour.

“Hyung, come on. Stop worrying and go tell him when an occasion comes, ok? Promise me you'll do that.” KyungSoo hoisted his 'pinky' finger, held it near MinSeok's face and twitched it in front of him, obtaining the recognition of his hyung. Their fingers locked. Although tentative and relatively sceptical, the younger sincerely believed that he'll keep it. Not for KyungSoo, but for himself.

“Let's not sit like this, should we close the shop now and go get some food?” A emphatic growl, whose source was YiXing's stomach, sounded in the room.

“Sure, that's an awesome idea.” MinSeok proclaimed and shot up from his seat like a rocket, helping KyungSoo stand too. They all settled to got to the “Morning Boost”, which served breakfasts until midday, then you could get some snacks and drinks. A ten-minute walk.

Invaded with an aimless thought, MinSeok diuscontinued walking, glancing at both of the astounded boys, one to another, one to another.

“Wait, aren't you two a couple?” The fortuitous question placed them both in a difficult situation, with hyung virtuously gawking, awaiting for the response. When no words were spoken, he faced Lay.

“Didn't you say something, that you were a couple now?” The humble boy degraded himself to the ground and begged that he would evaporate into the air and recede from KyungSoo's startled sight.

“It's, I mean, we're haven't-”

“Been a couple for long, but yes we are.”

Staggering on his own feet, YiXing's eyes seemed to exceed their limit of openess, as his mouth hung agape from the bewilderment. The giddy feeling was forming from the holded breath.

“W-we, we are?” Utterly neglecting MinSeok's presence, the question assembled itself on his lips, as unconceivable as it was seconds ago, those words came solid from KyungSoo's mouth and persisted in Lay's ears.

“Yes, you stupid, of course we are.” The repressed boy, wholly puzzled by the overlooked deceit, send them both an inquiring look, but he only received a substantial smile and an incapacitated Lay in the midst of the sidewalk.

“YiXing ah, are you ok?” He nudged his arm, but he was secluded in his own thoughts, so MinSeok choose to convulse his contracted muscles.

“Yah YiXing, wake up.” The pair of boys appeared remarkably enthralled by their friend's eccentric behaviour, particulary KyungSoo who understood the reasoning behind his reaction. At most, that's what he presumed. To regain the absorbed mind, he took the iniciative to interlace their fingers together and snapped him out of the reverie, holding firmly onto him.

“Let's go, I think you're alive again.” KyungSoo commenced a spiral of very auidible giggle, grinning the whole way to the cafe. Lay, on the other hand, kept peering at their touching hands, that passed a torrent of electricity through him everytime the other made a minor move. His first love belonged to him and his psyche wouldn't let him regard it as veracity.

Their designed table was situated in the corner, alongside a lady with a toddler. The restaurant was b with people nonchalantly slurping all types of Americanos, cappuccionos and lattes. Everyone manifested exhilaration and enjoyment as they preoccupied themselves in the discussion with one another.

The menu was packed with refreshments, quick snacks and cakes. Deciding what they wanted took at least ten restrained minutes in peace, looking over the countless labels of food. Eventually, MinSeok and KyungSoo requested Sando biscuits, while Lay got a Chocopie, the soldier's main obsession as hyung illustrated it. After a second though, they all ordered a cinnamon Chai tea.

“Mmm, this is really tasty.” Lay crammed the cakes into his mouth, one by one, until he gathered a thought of sharing it.

“Do you want some?” He offered them both one, yet they declined politely saying in order for him to savor the rest, seeing how he swallowed a them all in less than a minute.

Waiting for the tea, KyungSoo viewed the local disinterested, while they others chatted about MinSeok's visit in ShangHai last year.

He spotted a pair of boys sitting across the other side of the room, one articulating hastily, other one serenely gesticulating his hands. It captured his curiosity and he focused his eyes the boy who was silent. His companion didn't seem to resent his quietness. It only appeared to KyungSoo that he was mute after a couple of minutes after deliberating why his hands were so excessively active. Somehow those movements were as gentle as a swan like flowing in the air from one word to another. Words that KyungSoo didn't understand. He was amazed at the agility of his 'speech' and how this friend understood without a second thought, in a blink of an eye. He wondered how long it took to learn, maybe he could try?

The appearance of one was comparable to the one of a model from the Vogue magazines, like the ulzzangs he encountered on the internet. Chesnut hair, milky skin, hair supremly styled and astute, vast eyes. His features were supple and balletic, almost dainty. Young.

The boy opposite him was more gallant, a precise shade of tan, like the golden sun at its finest, on his skin that almost perfectly suited those charcoal eyes of his and complementing the brunet hair and caramel lips that formed into a broad, generous smile.

“KyungSoo yah, what are you looking at so intensively?” MinSeok faced the direction of KyungSoo's attentiveness and suspended himself. His heart halted shortly, gripping the image. Grieved, you could say, he felt grieved. Barely, because in the end, he had nothing to be envious of. No right to be possessive and that was what bruised the most. No reason for this feeling.

“I think I'll go now.” In rapid rush, he took the final sip of the tea and left without even looking back.

“Hyung, where you going?” YiXing muttered in startling as MinSeok dissappeared behind the corner.

“Do you really think I should tell him?” JongIn answered with a brief nod and a reassuring smile, clutching his friend's hand in his and staring him in the eyes penetrating his soul. Yes, yes you should.

LuHan was this kind of person who could be characterized as jaunty and easy going, the mood maker and bright personality of the group, only just possessed a problem with confidence every now and then. Extrovert, always surrounded by friends, warmhearted and a bit bizarre. Described by JongIn as the “untamed tiger buried in the body of an innocent deer”.

“I'm really scared he'll reject me. Ah, my head hurts from all the thinking. Jong, what do I do?” JongIn's hands made one move and LuHan sulked.

“Yah, I'm not an idiot. How dare you talk like that to your hyung?!” LuHan scowled at him, but JongIn only laughed soundlessly. Man up! Now go and tell him or I'll be underneath your bed when you get back.

“Sometimes I really question the reason why you're my friend. Thanks Jong, I'll text you if it works out, otherwise I'll go get drunk.” With these last words, he waved at JongIn and left, walking so weightlessly like a dragonfly.

Falteringly, Lay twisted himself and placed his hands on both of KyungSoo's slender shoulders, keeping him in place, facing him.

“Before, did you really meant it?” He swallowed emphatically and kept an uncomfortable eye contact. KyungSoo's emotionless eye contact.

“I did.” Still emotionless.

Maybe he still anticipated for the spark, a sign that his heart throbs the same way his did when he caught his eyes. Maybe he was simply naïve?

The clocks were signaling seven and the skies darkened, minute by minute. KyungSoo was determined to go to “The Quaver”, feeling his thoughts taking over him like a typhoon destroying the grounds of his mind. He needed a necessary desired an escape from the loathed existence and reality. The ongoing thought of missing something and yearning for the melody of his past to came back tortured him, again.

Did he deceived himself? Saying yes to Lay, was it a deceit of his own words? Just a play of his irresponsible heart? He haven't established that yet, his mind telling him he felt it, the same way Lay felt. His heart disputed and he was incapable of deciding. Like a monotonous quarrel inside him, something that couldn't be settled.

Sometimes he caught YiXing's on him, with eyes full of apprehension, and its reason was uncertain. Could he see his indecisive mentality? He held a feeling for Lay, but no words were able to describe it at this moment. And as much as he wished, he knew Lay wasn't SuHo and was never going to be.

Their pathways concluded here, KyungSoo gave him an abbreviated hug and said goodbye. Lay walked off.

“Wait, can I have your shop keys? I don't have mine.”

“Yeah, sure.” He hurled the keys and KyungSoo caught them awkwardly.

LuHan, holding a box of chocolates, anxiously, with trembling hands, knocked the door of apartment number 12.

“Baozi, it's LuHan.” He waited, as the door flung open and a petite man came out, with an amiable smile.

“Hello, did you came to see MinSeok?” LuHan's chest crushed a little at the image of a man,ordinarily coming out of his apartment with a bowl of ramen in his hand. Looks like he knows this place, like he stayed the night.

“Oh, no, it's nothing, sorry, wrong room I guess.” He bowed and left in haste, hoping to find a bar near, quickly.

He arrived at the shop and turned the lights on. Somehow, the created an impression of smaller... But in a perfect condition, MinSeok cleaned it up in his spare time, not a single bit of dust. He explored the stocks of CD's until his hands were holding his song. Comptine d'Un Autre Ete. The quiet melody of the piano sounded in the room, single notes of the polyrhyhtms, one louder than other, crescendo and accelerating. More anguished, his own nursery, his own harmony, his own melody. He withdrawn into blackness when his eyes closed in the main part of the instrumental. Memories played back, so vivid, yet so dead.

“I'm not coming back Soo...”

All absurd. All lies. His life was a delusion, when he held YiXing but felt SuHo's arms around him. He made a pledged to not ever fall this hard again, to hold love back, to only stay for a while. He condemned himself for playing on his friend's feelings, the way the melody builds up, only to end unexpectedly, leaving a feeling a numbness and finality.

Was he deceiving himself each time he wished for a single call, a message? Desperately listening to this song to remember, because there was nothing left of him. Closing himself in this place, away from people, surrounded by melodies, only to be closer to where he was before, when a smile was something familiar and music was something that kept him breathing. In a place where he wasn't missing anything and someone was always holding his hand to lead him the right way.

The sound of the door opening distracted him from falling apart, as a single man came in peaking around and searching for something that was indeed the white grand piano. He stood in the door, beaming at KyungSoo and playing an imperceptible piano with his fingers, following the last notes of the lyric. He knew that song. He played it thousands of times before, yet the song was still as heartrending and worthwhile as before, haven't lost its excellence.

“Hi, I'm sorry, we're closed.” He sent an absent smile, but the stranger didn't propel, purely pointed to the door sign which read 'open'. KyungSoo must have forgotten to turn it around. He felt precarious but considered that one person wouldn't take much of his time, so he stepped into the role of a cashier once again. After hours.

“Would you like any help?” With a courteous voice, he tried gaining the customer's attention, but there was no response. From the back, the boy seemed tall. Or maybe KyungSoo just didn't realize how petite he was? He was slim and good looking. When he spun around face-to-face with the cashier, his eyes imme. The features you can only see in movies; gallant, a precise shade of tan, like the golden sun at its finest, on the skin that almost perfectly suited the charcoal eyes and complemented the brunet hair and carmel lips. KyungSoo faltered upon his own foot and tumbled to the ground. The stranger extended his hand in the sympathetic manner, keeping the silence. It was baffling, but KyungSoo accepted his hand.

“Thank you, I'm a bit clumsy today.” And again, only a smile from the handsome boy, who spun on his foot and left KyungSoo in daze, as he walked out of the store with a confident step.

This face, he recognized it, but his memory was deafeated in this moment and no name belonged to it. It was familiar, that's for sure. Those gorgeous eyes. Who was he?

JongIn dragged his feet around the park, it was cold. His hands quivered and lips turned violet. Without any idea as to where he was heading now, because home wasn't a place he wanted to be in. Constant worry and the hospitality of his parents to the point where it proclaimed counterfeit was sickening. He muted the sound of the world with the ful volume music that played through the maroon headphones.

JYJ – Heaven. Always at the wrong time, erroneous place. The bench. He searched for little words curved in the wood. “Krong & Yehet”. He found it ridiculous, the nicknames they had for each other, one named for the odd habit, another for the shameful imitation. No heart in the middle, like most couples, because they haven't defined themselves like one. Yet it still meant a connection, a relationship. He wondered how many times he tried to tell SeHun that he loved him, how many times he was just a coward. Would it have been different if his voice wasn't so loud back then? If he just listened, it would've been different.

He leaned back and placed his back against the chilled bench, looking straight ahead at the silence and absence of any living soul. Then he heard the fading footsteps. It was twelve o'clock. A boy, walking quickly towards the building ahead. He footsteps were so light, as if he was flying, yet his head was hanging low. In the light of the lamp, his eyes flickered as scant tear drops fell heavily onto the ground. The boy stopped, took a deep breath as his chest moved up and down and closed his eyes. Opened, then started walking again. Like he had to take a break because he was tired, like nothing happened.

JongIn observed. The companiles boy who cried.

Seems like I'm not the only lonely soul here, looks like he has it hard too.

KyungSoo opened the door to the apartment and saw his brother sat down on the sofa, watching TV and holding a phone in his hand.

“, KyungSoo yah, where were you?” He gave him a hug and slapped his arm lightly. “Next time, pick up the phone, it's nearly half past twelve.”

“Sorry hyung.” KyungSoo didn't bother to look him in the eyes. His hyung seemed concerned, which wasn't something new, but KyungSoo felt happy that someone worried, yet didn't wanted to worry him at the same time. He made his way to his room.

“Wait, Kyungie, thank you.” He handed the donsaeng a white, glass coffee cup with french drawings on it. “I though you'd like one, you always seem so dead in the morning.” He patted his shoulder and gave him a moment to appraciate the present.

“But, what for?”

“I'm engaged.”