Just hearing from Seunghyun in any capacity; a text, a phone call, anything; had become the highlight of Jiyong’s existence. Sure, sitting at home doing nothing was still a very boring life. His days were still nothing but breathing machines, nurses, and hovering parents. But even just one form of communication from Seunghyun made his days exciting. Seunghyun still couldn’t talk often. There were days where he’d only text once or call and just sit on the phone until he fell asleep; Jiyong understood that the chemo was taking a lot out of him. But the pair had learned each other, and had gotten used to this system. Even if it was just one such call a day, calling at all had become enough. They were just happy to hear from each other, honestly.

                This time, Seunghyun had sent him a random selfie, his bald head hidden underneath a navy blue knit cap and a smile on his tired-looking face. Jiyong couldn’t help but to smile at the picture. It was summer, and it was hot out, but Seunghyun had become glued to his knit caps. Besides the fact that his baldness was new and a bit jarring for him, he also complained that his head felt cold without his hair. It was also probably due to the fact that he had been spending the bulk of his time inside. It was a bit hard for him to go around, and even still, the doctors wanted him to be isolated from others as much as possible, to avoid any sort of contamination. So, spending time inside during a hot summer meant lots of air conditioning and an unusually cold head.

                “Cute.” Jiyong texted him casually, wondering if he’d actually get a reply, this time. Beyoncé serenaded him in the background, her new album playing on loop over his TV from his iTunes. He’d sort of been listening to it for the past 2 hours. Things like that were a lot more interesting when there was nothing really to do.

                Seunghyun didn’t take long to text back. The text alert sounded almost as soon as he’d wondered when Seunghyun would reply. That made him smile, too.

                “Just cute?” Seunghyun’s message read. Jiyong chuckled to himself.

                “Yes. Nice dimples,” Jiyong replied swiftly, humming along to Beyoncé’s lyrics.

                “Tired of being bald,” Seunghyun responded, just about a quickly as Jiyong had. Jiyong read over his message for a while, wondering if Seunghyun was feeling a little more upset over losing his hair than he let on. There wasn’t much to be said that could comfort him. Jiyong had been through the baldness (and was probably headed back there, honestly.) Nothing said really made it feel better. The only thing that truly made it feel better was, well, growing hair back.

                “I like it on you,” Jiyong typed after a while, hesitating before pressing send.

                “You would,” Seunghyun responded after a few minutes. It seemed as if the hair thing was bothering him.

                “Send me a pick of your glorious baldness,” Jiyong replied, making light of the situation.

                “No…” Seunghyun replied after a while.

                “I was just playing around,” Ji frowned a little, letting out a sigh as he sent the message. He stared at the phone, anticipating Seunghyun’s reply. There was always and element of frustration that surfaced when people made light of something you were self-conscious about. Jiyong guessed that was true, not only for cancer kids but for everyone. Then his phone rang. Seunghyun’s handsome face popped up on his screen and he grinned a little, trading his CPAP mask for his oxygen tank before answering the call.

                “I was just kidding,” Ji said as soon as he answered the phone.

                “So, there are fun things I’m learning about having leukemia. Wanna know what they are?” Seunghyun asked, jumping right into his own thing. Jiyong paused a moment, analyzing the grogginess of his voice.

                “Uh… yeah, sure, Seunghyun,” he responded gently. Seunghyun scoffed a little.

                “Don’t sound sympathetic before you even know what I’m going to say,” Seunghyun scolded him.

                “I … have no sympathy for you whatsoever,” Jiyong replied matter-of-factly, fighting a smile.

                “That’s better. Thing number one,”

                “Just gonna get right to it, huh,”

                “Sometimes, you get to experience what it’s like to be on a rickety shrimping boat in the middle of a hurricane – for FREE!” Seunghyun chuckled to himself, though his tone sounded maybe a little angry.

                “Uh… in what way?” Jiyong asked cautiously.

                “The room, Ji. It just spins and spins and all you can do is lay there and deal with it,” Seunghyun huffed, then he chuckled. “Apparently that means the blood isn’t reaching your brain enough… or something like that. And they try to pump you full of nutrients and liquids just so your blood forms healthy red cells and acts like regular ing blood, but…” his thought trailed off, and he went quiet a little.

                “… I’m having a harder time not being sympathetic, Seunghyun,” Ji frowned, wishing he could do something to help.

                “I guess I’ll take that sympathy. Second fun-tastic leukemia thing: everything tastes like ing metal,”

                “I think that’s a chemo thing,”

                “No… I mean, well, I guess. But the little food I manage to eat tastes like on a penny,” Seunghyun’s weak voice had sort of become a rant, now. “Third amazing thing: you get to see what you’d look like if you were a Smurf.”

                “You really have a list?”

                “Are you even listening to me? I said sometimes your fingers, lips, feet turn blue for NO REASON,” Seunghyun yelled, then he laughed a little before letting out a groan. “And you go bald and look like a bloated, turtle.” Ji laughed, Seunghyun chuckled. “Don’t laugh at me, .”

                “You don’t look like a bloated turtle, though, Seunghyun,” Jiyong insisted, smiling to himself. “… It’s really good to hear your voice. You sound tired, though.”

                “I’m a little tired,” Seunghyun replied, calmer, now. “I missed you, so… thought calling would be fun.”

                “How’s the… well, are you doing okay, today?” Ji asked cautiously.

                “Yeah… you know how it goes. Slow… steady. I’m just, you know… dealing with it. I think I’m not even scared, anymore. I’m just annoyed,” Seunghyun rattled on.

                “Congrats. You’ve officially joined to ranks of the veteran cancer kids,” Ji chuckled a little. “Are you feeling down about your baldness?”

                “The baldness can’t be helped,” Seunghyun commented dryly.

                “It’s normal to feel kinda ty about it, though,” Jiyong replied gently. The line was silent for a few minutes. Seunghyun hadn’t really enjoyed getting affirmations like that from Jiyong. “I know… I’m not trying to like pacify you, or anything.”

                “It’s just that, I told you before, Ji… I know what I’m dealing with, and I can handle it,”

                “I know… Sorry,”

                “… You don’t have to apologize. I just… I just want to deal with this in my own way. You dealt with yours in your own way all these years,” Seunghyun paused a moment. “Sorry. That was a little insensitive.”

                “Since when are you sensitive? I’m not with you because you’re sensitive,” Ji assured him.

                “So, you’re with me?” Seunghyun asked, a smile hanging on his tone. Jiyong fought against his own smile.

                “Reading into what I say when it benefits you?” Jiyong asked playfully, his smile immediately breaking free. Seunghyun chuckled a little.

                “I’m just repeating what you said.”

                “That, you are,” Jiyong replied shyly, smiling to himself.

                “Then, you consider yourself in some sort of romance with me, right?” Seunghyun chuckled knowingly.

                “Or, I could have simply been saying that I’m with you in this cancer thing. You know, all for one, one for all, and that,” he deflected playfully. In a sense, he was just teasing with Seunghyun, but also, he didn’t want to be the one to declare that they were a thing. He wanted Seunghyun to see it that way, too. He wanted Seunghyun to assure him that he was right. Mostly, he wanted Seunghyun to ask him, officially, to be with him.

                “Oh, come on! We’re totally in a romance. You don’t make-out with guys you’re not in a romance with,”

                “It’s entirely possible to do just that, Seunghyun,” Ji pointed out, smiling dreamily at the prospect of being Seunghyun’s boyfriend.

                “It’s possible, but it’s not possible for Jiyong Kwon, who is the squarest and most innocent kid I’ve ever met,” Seunghyun persisted. “And besides that, our continued correspondence sense our last visit has certainly trended towards some sort of romantic relationship.”

                “Are you trying to ask me out via logical deduction about the state of our relationship?” Jiyong asked, incredibly fascinated by Seunghyun’s ability to talk.

                “Who says I’m asking you out? I’m merely commenting on the situation that the two of us find ourselves in, and arguing that it is indeed a romance,” Seunghyun continued, sounding like some sort of attorney arguing for his client’s freedom.

                “Hm… Well, I would argue that, if you’re not asking me out, and you never have, we are not officially in a romance,” Jiyong pushed, smiling at the sound of Seunghyun’s deep chuckle.

                “Touché,” he replied simply.

                “Then… I guess I have no choice but to seek romance elsewhere,” Jiyong teased, feigning indifference.

                “I guess this is as good a time as any to tell you, then, that I’ve been having quite the affair with my regular nurse,” Seunghyun commented. He sounded so serious that Jiyong’s heart jumped for a second, and he gasped in a deep breath, clutching his chest.

                “Not funny,” he nearly coughed out. Seunghyun laughed a little. “Seriously, that scared me.”

                “I didn’t think it would. Come on, how could I be having an affair with my nurse? I barely have enough energy to talk to you on the phone, let alone woo some nurse,” Seunghyun laughed.

                “I have a lung condition,”

                “Yes, we established that,”

                “So, don’t make me hyperventilate like that,” Jiyong exaggerated, whining a little.

                “I am incredibly flattered by this reaction, Jiyong,” Seunghyun chuckled.

                “Well… I’m glad you’re flattered,” Jiyong retorted. If he were being completely honest, he was a little disappointed that Seunghyun hadn’t actually asked him, yet. “… You just sit there and enjoy being flattered. I’ll just, you know, keep giving you reasons to be flattered until I croak in a few years.”

                “Whoa, Captain Melodrama, back it up. Are you really upset?” Seunghyun asked, surprised at Jiyong’s unenthused response. Jiyong sat quiet for a moment, listening to Beyoncé and unsure of how to respond. After a moment, he sighed, and he paused the music with his remote control.

                “It’s just that I really…” he began, though the words wouldn’t flow when he searched for them.

                “… want me to ask you to be with me?” Seunghyun asked, filling in the blanks.

                “I don’t want to ask you to, though,” Jiyong wined, frowning to himself. He felt his cheeks flushing, and he rubbed one of them with the back of his hand. “So, just forget it, and let’s move on.”

                “I only didn’t ask you because, as far as I’m concerned, we are together,” Seunghyun replied confidently. “You… kinda are my whole life right now, kid.” Jiyong felt his heart rate increase as Seunghyun’s words echoed through his mind.

                “Heh… that’s… just because I’m sorta the only friend around you at this time,” he inferred, trying not to get too excited over the prospect of having an actual boyfriend. After all, he’d never had one before and this still felt a little too good to be true.

                “You’re the only friend around because you’re the only one I want around, honestly. I make an effort to talk to you because I can’t stand not talking to you. And I miss your face, so…” Seunghyun’s words faded into a shy chuckle; one which Jiyong followed thusly.

                “Adorable,” Jiyong commented, and the pair shared awkward chuckles again. “So… You think of me as your… boyfriend?”

                “Well, you think of me as yours, so…” Seunghyun accused him.

                “I do not! Well, maybe … somewhat,” Jiyong laughed.

                “Well… do you … want me to think of you as my boyfriend?” Seunghyun asked cautiously.

                “Of course!” Jiyong laughed, smiling to himself. “So… is this official, then?”

                “Oh, God…” Seunghyun groaned playfully. “I guess so. I don’t see why you needed an official declaration, but you can consider this that.”

                “Hey, cut me some slack. This is my first time,” Ji grinned, his voice colored by his happy expression. Seunghyun let out a soft, humble laugh.

                “I keep forgetting,” he sighed softly, his deep voice humming as though he were trying to gather his thoughts. “I… I’m absolutely honored to have the privilege of being your first love.” He’d said it so shyly that Jiyong almost missed it; when he did, he felt as if he would burst with happiness. It took everything in him not to react with the biggest scream of his life.

                “It’s my privilege, Seunghyun,”

AN: SURPRISE! Guys... I know it's been ages since the last update. T_T I'm sorry! I wrote this one quickly to let you guys know I'm ABSOLUTELY finishing this story! I actually wrote it a few weeks ago, and I didn't like it very much, but I wanted to give you guys something kind of nice to sort of reawaken the story!~ You guys have been super loyal over the course of the months I've been working on this story. So I will make good chapters from you guys from now on! Our boys made it official, now! Yay! lol. Please continue to read & leave nice comments and I'll work hard to make this story good! (No promises about sadness level, though! ^^)