BoA walked into the hotel lobby, her smile radiant. The day with Shin had been thoroughly enjoyable, as usual. Somehow he could always make her smile and forget about her worries. In fact, the time that she had spent in the Bahamas was nearly too wonderful for her to be real. But if it were a dream, she didn't want this dream to end.

Just then, the hotel receptionist beckoned to her, "Miss Kwon?"

"Yes I am she, is anything the matter?" BoA asked.

The hotel receptionist produced an envelope from behind the reception desk, "Your father had called and left you a message."

BoA froze, slightly taken aback. How did her father know she was here?

"Are you sure you got the right person?" She asked the receptionist.

The receptionist nodded, "There's no mistake. He even sent a picture of you to make sure," she said, waving a small photograph at her.

He must have asked my dear father-in-law-to-be to find me. BoA thought to herself. If anything, the Kim family had their sources everywhere.

BoA thanked the receptionist and went upstairs to her room. She closed the door behind her, holding the envelope rigidly in one hand.

She sat down heavily on the bed and sighed, staring at the envelope with a sinking feeling in her stomach. She could nearly predict what the message was. All the same, she opened the envelope and took out the piece of note paper inside.

Dear daughter,

I don't know why you suddenly ran off to the Bahamas but I assume you needed some time on your own. However, Mr. Kim is furious that you just left without an explanation with the date for you to formally announce your engagement so close by. You've been away for nearly a week dear. Now it's time for you to come back. We are all worried about you, especially Jung Hoon and me.

BoA ran a hand absently through her hair, the message was just as she had expected. Reality had come knocking at her door.

She didn't want to go back. She wanted to stay here in this tropical paradise. She wanted to spend another few days with Shin. She wanted to...

No, stop it! The sensible part of her shouted back, stopping her from carrying on. She had already let her willful spirit take her here. She had already pushed her limits far enough. It was time to take responsibility for her actions. Just then, Shin's face surfaced in her mind and she was reminded of the days of fun they had spent together. She sighed sadly. She didn't want to leave him yet...but she knew had to. That was the prudent thing to do.

Making up her mind, BoA took out some paper from the desk drawer and sat down to write.

"I'm sorry Shin, but I can't bring myself to say goodbye to you."

*

"She told me to pass this to you sir," the waiter said, bending down to pass the letter to the seated customer before him.

Jae Joong looked up from the table which was set for two. He frowned as he took the letter from the waiter. It was from Violette. He glanced at the empty chair opposite him, she hadn't shown up yet and now in her place was a letter. Had something come up?

Still frowning, he opened the envelope in impatience and took out the letter. His eyes scanning every single word she had written.

Dear Shin,

I'm sorry for not being able to say goodbye to you personally. I feel that if I saw you, I would somehow be persuaded to stay. As you read this, I'm probably on a plane back to Korea. I will always remember these few days that we have spent together. Have you ever had good dreams? The time spent with you felt like that- extraordinary, comfortable but transient. Even so, they were the best days of my life. So I thank you for leaving me with these wonderful memories. Before, I didn't have the courage to face the situation I was in and so I ran away to here. Then I met you. You were like the breath of fresh air that I needed and somehow our similar situations made me feel that I wasn't alone. We all feel afraid and run at times but we can't run forever Shin. So now I've decided to face up to reality and I think you should too. Because if we just keep running, we might run so far away that we can't find our way back.

I know you might be mad at me for just leaving like this, but I think it's better this way. Both of us have our own different lives to return to, our own trials to overcome and I think we might take some time to sort things out. Let's not let our burdens taint these blissful few days we've spent together. They felt like a sweet, sweet dream and maybe that's how it should remain. It was chance that brought us together and maybe, if chance permits, we will meet each other again.
 

P.S. That painting of the sunset is yours to keep.

A slow but sad smile tugged at his lips as he finished reading the letter. Gently, he folded the letter up and slipped it into his pocket. His heart felt a lonely ache then as he knew that he was probably never going to see her again. He had to admit that she had been special to him, more so than he thought she would be. She wasn't anything like the girls he went out with. She was different. It was like she could see who he really was and appreciate him for who he was. But now, she had come and gone like the wind.

Still, he knew that her decision was for the best and he was happy that she had found her courage.

Just then, he casually turned his head out towards the window and his gaze drifted up to the clear blue sky where he saw a plane flying high overhead.

He smiled gently at the thought that she might be on that plane.

"All the best to you, Violette," he whispered, his eyes following the plane until it passed out of sight. This time with her in the Bahamas had been the best days of his life as well...

He let the silent disappointment of her departure hang in the air for a few moments.

Then he gave a deep sigh and slouched against his chair, his fingers groping around the cellphone in his pocket. If Violette had found the strength to face her problems, then it was all the more time for him to face up to his.

It was time to stop running away.

Mustering up his courage, he pulled out his cellphone and dialed a number.

"Hello, Dad? This is Jae Joong..."

*

"Are you ready?" Jung Hoon whispered as he wrapped his arms affectionately around his fiance's waist.

BoA forced a small smile, knowing that his thoughts and hers were the exact opposite. "I guess I'm a little nervous."

Jung Hoon kissed her shoulder and then her hair, taking in the light smell of her perfume. "I'm glad you're back. I've missed you."

BoA stood still, feeling a thousand times guilty for what she was about to do in another 10 minutes' time.

Jung Hoon noticed that his fiance was unusually quiet. "BoA, are you okay?"

BoA nodded, "Yeah... I'm fine. I think I just need to get a drink," she said.

Jung Hoon released her, "Don't take too long, we have to go out to meet our guests soon."

BoA smiled and headed towards the door, "Don't worry, I'll be quick."

"By the way you look beautiful in that dress," Jung Hoon said, smiling at her.

BoA gave him a quick smile and replied, "I'll meet you outside," and she closed the door behind her.

Bored, Jung Hoon looked casually around the room and then his eyes landed on a piece of paper on her desk. Curious, he walked over to take a look. It was one of BoA's self composed poems.

Here at the crossroad
where memories were woven and carved
an exquisite extreme, yet a gentle lullaby

that soothes our souls; a remedy
for our pasts and a breakaway from expectations.

Gazing in the same
unwavering direction, at the same time spelling
two different stories,
we paused, mused, reflected.

We walked hand in hand, watched
as our footprints melted into sand, reaching out to
the vast blue sky, sky

greeting us with joy. Unaware that
we have thus changed

and it's been ever since...

He gripped the piece of paper tightly in his hand, so tightly that it shook slightly.

He kept his head bowed, his eyes re-reading the verses again and again trying to take in the harsh reality.

"Unaware that we have thus changed, unaware that we have thus changed." That particular sentence seemed to be amplified in his head. Although he had been denying it, he knew that her heart no longer belonged to him. It belonged to elsewhere, to the sky, to the sun or to another man, he didn't care. What mattered is that he had lost her.

Is everything going to be different? Is everything they ever had together has to be totally erased? It hurt knowing that it had all just been blown down so easily, like a young plant without roots to hold it firmly to the ground. It suddenly started to occur to him if they had had anything in the first place.

He closed his eyes and exhaled slowly as he placed the piece of paper back onto the table in the exact same position, as if the feelings it had been carrying had never been known. She had never planned to tell him, but still, he had found out about her feelings and the truth cut deep.

Rousing himself, he turned and walked towards the door. As he reached for the handle, he paused for a moment, his thoughts lingering on her. And then he took a deep breath and opened the door, ready to meet the awaiting guests.

But he knew he was going to lose her.

*

"Jung Hoon, congratulations!"

"Both of you look like the perfect couple!"

Confetti was being showered onto them.

But none of these gestures made any impact on Jung Hoon as he made his way across the ballroom filled with people. They had been reduced to faint murmurs in his ears. It was as if his senses had been numbed from the sudden revelation earlier. Part of him couldn't believe it and yet the other part of him knew all along. He turned to see BoA at his side and immediately, she took his breath away. But as he looked closer, he saw that her dazzling smile did not reach her eyes and neither was her face glowing with happiness.

He felt stung, hurt even betrayed but even so he wanted her. He loved her.

The two of them stood on stage, putting on their best smiles and truly, from an outsider's point of view. They looked perfect for each other, but underneath their masks was a totally different story.

"I must thank you all for coming today," began Mr. Kim. "Today is an important day as my son would like to announce an important event which would affect the rest of his life and... maybe even our lives."

The crowd laughed.

Mr. Kim beckoned towards the couple standing on stage.

"Jung Hoon, I..." BoA began.

Jung Hoon cut her off and smiled reassuringly at her, "Don't worry, I know what to say."

BoA was about to interrupt again but then he had already started the speech. Inside her she was panicking, she couldn't let him announce their engagement!

She was about to snatch the microphone away from him when...

"Thank you all for coming today," Jung Hoon paused, smiling faintly at the crowd. He hesitated a little before he continued to say what he had decided to announce on the behalf of his love, "but I would like to announce that...our engagement is cancelled."

There was a stunned silence and then murmuring began to spread through the crowd. Mr. Kim was at a loss for words.

As Jung Hoon was continuing with his explanation, BoA just stood quietly by his side, too overwhelmed by the turn of the situation. Had he felt the same way she had? Why? Her mind had been full of questions until he had said the phrase from her poem.

"...we were always in love, or so we thought. However, somewhere along the way both of us realized that we were unaware that we have thus changed..."

He knew it. He knew it all. And yet he was graciously saving her from embarrassment and taking the full blow of the press, of his dad, of everyone. Once again he was protecting her as he always did. He loved her too much to hurt her. And he didn't care if he would end up hurting himself instead.

BoA gazed at the man beside her; he looked as calm and confident as ever. But she knew that inside him he must be heartbroken. She knew his love for her ran deep and now she had hurt him like this.

Her eyes moistened with tears, deeply touched by his actions. He didn't have to do this and yet he did. Subtly, where no eyes could see, she reached out to hold his hand in silent thanks.

"...Once again, thank you all for coming and I apologize for any false hope that we may have given you."

"BoA let's go," he said softly as he gently ushered her off the stage, still holding her hand.

*

Jung Hoon closed the door behind them. Finally, they were alone, away from the questioning eyes of the people outside.

They stood less than a meter apart but both were unable to face the other. They let an awkward and heavy silence hang in the air. There was so much to be explained and yet there was nothing to be said.

BoA sneaked a glance nervously at Jung Hoon and although his back was turned towards her, she noticed that his head was bowed and his shoulders were slightly hunched. He always got like that whenever something upsets him. And this time she was the cause to it.

BoA bit her lip, "Jung Hoon..."

When he turned to face her, he had a soft smile on his face. "It's alright, BoA. I understand. Maybe I was too excited, too eager to marry you that I didn't think about your feelings." Despite his smile, he was unable to mask the dejection in his voice.

"No...it's not your fault, it's..."

"Don't say anything," he said softly as he brushed away a stray strand of hair away from her face. "I know."

Lovingly, forlornly, his fingers continued to linger on her face. They traced the side of her perfectly oval face, and then he cupped her cheek in the palm of his hand.

She did not pull away.

Then as if suddenly realizing what he was doing, he abruptly withdrew this gesture of affection and exhaled, "Well, I guess now I only have dad left to go!" he said, a little too cheerfully.

BoA wrapped her arms around him. The gratitude she felt could not be expressed in words, "Thank you," she whispered.

He brought his arms up, wanting to hold her close but he knew that that would make goodbye even harder.

Instead, he let his arms drop painfully, silently to his side and closed his eyes. He felt as if his heart had been shattered but she could not know. If she did, both of them would be hurt.

"Promise me you'll be happy alright?" he said, his voice wavering slightly.

BoA let him go and nodded, "I will. I promise."

He tried to smile, "That's good."

Before BoA could reply, he cut her off.

"You'd better go before my father gets in here," he said, rousing himself.

He placed both hands on her shoulders and smiled reassuringly at her, "Don't worry I'll be fine. What's the worst he can do to me?"

Seeing that she was still hesitant, he directed her towards the door, "Go on, go. I'll be fine," he said.

Inside him, he wished with all his heart that she would stay.

BoA looked at him for a last time and smiled.

Then she turned around and left.

Not being able to keep his composure anymore, he went back into the room and shut the door.

His legs giving way, he slowly sank back down against the door. Only then, did he let his pent up tears fall from his eyes.

Then he remembered the smile she had given him just before she left. That smile had reached her eyes.

His smile was sad then, but he knew that loving her was setting her free.

*

At the same time, somewhere else in Korea, Jae Joong gave a light sneeze as he looked out through the window of his dad's office. He smiled as he recalled what his father had said to him just moments ago, thought unwillingly, his dad had allowed him to pursue his passion. He had wanted so much to tell Violette about it, he wanted to share this good piece of news with her, yet she was not by his side.

Tracing the clouds in the sky, he thought silently to himself. Is everything turning out well for you too, Violette?

A smile slid across his face as memories of their times in Bahamas circled back into his mind.

Copyright Alexis 2008-2011