Hello everyone! So unfortunately this is my last update until after Thursday because I have things going on for school.

There is a big mystery to solve, and... you'll see when you read this chapter.

Subscribers, commentors, everyone reading, like. I cannot express how thankful I am for everyone supporting this fanfic. Sometimes I don't even know how I have so much support. All of you are fantastic and I love you all for taking the time to read this. :D

Dongwoo waited outside of the tent for strategic planning for Sunggyu. It was 7:00, and Dongwoo was awake since 4:00 to help greet incoming Squads 80029 and 05072 to the Pyongyang Military Base. Sunggyu was also early that day to discuss the next plan of action in the war, meeting with Lieutenant General Yoshida, Captain Sungho, and Captain Peo since 5:30. Dongwoo was fidgety, shivering from the cold and the day before. Tensions were flaring between their group over Sungjong's disappearance, and everyone was doing their best not to take sides.

Sunggyu walked out of the tent with a few other soldiers in strategic planning. His face was pale walking towards Dongwoo, almost burdened with something.

"Hey Sunggyu," Dongwoo greeted.

"How are the new troops?" Sunggyu asked.

"Oh you know. A lively bunch, prepared to fight, never seen blood on the battlefield in their lives," Dongwoo chimed.

"Heh, sounds just like us," Sunggyu chuckled.

"I think this group is going to be a good bunch. They trained in Busan, and they're used to adapting to the surrounding nature," Dongwoo commented.

Sunggyu nodded his head silently.

"What's going on? How was your meeting?" Dongwoo asked, noticing a change of attitude with Sunggyu.

Reluctant to speak loudly, Sunggyu leaned in to whisper. "This will be announced at the 10:00 meeting, but you can't tell anyone right now."

"Sure," Dongwoo shrugged.

Sunggyu covered Dongwoo's ear. "Squad 10609 is the one heading to Yundo."

Dongwoo jumped back in shock. "What?"

Sunggyu continued to speak softly. "Captain Peo demanded it. I don't know, but he really holds our troop in high regard. Especially Hoya..."

"Well that explains some things," Dongwoo scoffed. Hearing Hoya's name, Dongwoo remembered the current mental state he was in due to their first battle. Dongwoo had yet to properly talk to Hoya about it all, ask about his feelings, why he blew up on Myungsoo a day earlier. 

"Dongwoo, this is a lot bigger than you can imagine. No one has found the nuclear weapons yet. That makes our troop almost responsible to do so," Sunggyu affirmed.

There were bigger issues than Dongwoo could ever expect. "Us, finding the nuclear weapons?"

"There's potential. And we're one of the troops who are expected to take down Yundo. It's us, Dongwoo. Us."

"Is our troop even capable of doing something like that? I know Hoya has led us to some great things, and Captain Peo is almost an unsaid hero, but why us? I don't know if I want to do that. Going into Sotena territory, that's a bigger chance of us dy..." Dongwoo shut his mouth, unable to finish.

"Hey..." Sunggyu gave him an encouraging hug, placing Dongwoo's head on his shoulder. He could feel Dongwoo's heartbeat racing on his chest, pounding out and vibrating on Sunggyu's body. "We're going to be ok, and I'm working hard to create some strategies to survive this. We're going to be ok, Dongwoo."

Dongwoo dug his nose into Sunggyu's shoulder, holding onto Sunggyu tighter. "Nothing to fear but fear itself, right?" he asked.

Sunggyu chuckled. "Exactly."

As the two of them hugged, a figure was listening in on their conversation from behind one of the bunkers. It was trying to find Dongwoo, but instead walked in on the big news for Squad 10609. The figure leaned against the wall, covering its mouth in disbelief that their squad was the chosen one to head to Sotena. It was a question of bravery, which was always boasted and magnified as a ranked soldier. But now that 10609 was picked, it was a question of whether he had the courage to continue on. 

Hoya hugged himself, shaken from Sunggyu's news. He heard enough, running back to his residence.

(((())))

"Myungsoo, wake up. Myungsoo."

"Huh, what? What?"

Myungsoo opened his eyes, a blurry figure at the edge of his bed waiting for him and grabbing onto his arm. He noticed in front of him there was an abundance of blankets covering him more than usual. He shrugged the arm off and turned to find Sungyeol waiting on the edge of his bed, fully dressed in his uniform.

"You have to wake up now. We have a meeting in an hour, remember?" Sungyeol smiled and ruffled the confused kid's bangs, which were a little wet with sweat from the night before.

Myungsoo sat up from his bed, pulling the blankets away from him. What? There were close to six layers of blankets that were on him warming him up last night. That explains why I feel a little sweaty right now. Myungsoo jumped off his bed scratching his eye to wake up. He blinked his eyes one more time. "What?" Myungsoo's voice squeaked.

Not a single blanket was on Sungyeol's bed. 

"Did you put your blankets on me last night?" Myungsoo asked.

After joining Myungsoo in his bed, it took almost an hour for Myungsoo's nightmare to subside and fall into a better sleep. His bedsheets were already wet and cold, Myungsoo was shivering. No amount of body heat from Sungyeol could help him stop, so Sungyeol brought his blankets to the top of the bed to comfort him.

"You were cold last night," Sungyeol explained, passing Myungsoo's uniform to me.

"Oh. Thanks."

Myungsoo grabbed his shirt from Sungyeol, ing the top to put on. Myungsoo was able to get a decent amount of rest for the upcoming events for today, and waking up he was calm in a mournful manner. It was as if he woke up and accepted Sungjong's departure. There was an immense amount of pain in Myungsoo's heart, and there was now an empty void that was taken by Sungjong's innocence and drive. If there was something that kept Myungsoo going, it was Sungjong's fighting spirit and enthusiasm. Myungsoo was off, and he wondered how Sungyeol could look fine right now after everything that happened. "Do you think about Sungjong?" Myungsoo asked.

Sungyeol was staring at a picture on their drawer of the seven of them in middle school. He picked up the picture, caressing the glass right around Sungjong's face. This was taken in a classroom after Sungyeol and Myungsoo pranked them by pretending a ghost haunted the classroom. Rumors spread that a girl was murdered in the room where they had music class. One day after school, the seven of them were hanging out with one of their old childhood friends Ji Ae. Sungyeol dressed up as a ghost while Myungsoo kept everyone company. When everything settled, Sungyeol popped out of nowhere and scared the life out of everyone. Woohyun fell to the floor and Sungjong screamed like a girl, punching Sungyeol and telling him he was the ugliest ghost he had ever seen in his life. The picture was posed with Sungyeol wearing his ghost wig, everyone else in their school uniforms.

Sungyeol and Sungjong always had that relationship. The playful fighting, the pranks, the playground wars. That was during a time when they still had innocence. Sungyeol was unsure where that disappeared to. "I miss Sungjong more than anyone will ever know. But, you know me. I have to stay strong."

Myungsoo fed his arms through the holes of the shirt and fitted it to presentation, buttoning it down to match each hole. He nodded his head. "I wish I could be stronger."

Sungyeol smiled."You're one of the strongest people I know. We all have courage at varying levels, and it comes out when the time is right."

Sungeol was always good with his words, and Myungsoo knew it was because he had gone through a lot growing up that he gained some wisdom to carry on. Myungsoo admired that dearly. "I'm sorry if I woke you up last night. I know you're a light sleeper and all," Myungsoo apologized.

"It's alright. I wanted you to sleep well." Simply stated, Sungyeol had no other explanation.

Sungyeol watched as Myungsoo clumsily threw his shirt on.

"You missed a hole again," Sungyeol pointed out.

"What?" Myungsoo looked down at his shirt, missing two buttons in the middle. He blushed. "Damnit."

(((())))

With 10 minutes until their meeting with every soldier in the vicinity to announce assignments, Sunggyu, Dongwoo, Woohyun, Sungyeol, and Myungsoo gathered together in their usual meeting spot for their meeting. Trying to lighten up the mood, they kept the topic of Sungjong to themselves. 

"He was teaching me a little Japanese, and before they eat they say this phrase: itadakimasu," Woohyun demonstrated.

"Why do they say that?" Sungyeol asked.

"I guess it means, thank you for the food we're receiving today," Woohyun explained.

"It's a nice phrase. Maybe I should start saying that too," Dongwoo chimed.

"Don't butcher it, now?" Sunggyu joked.

Still, while the spirits were up there were missing pieces to the bond that they had before. 

"Where is Hoya?" Myungsoo asked. Their last meeting ended on a rough patch, and he was bitter about being blamed.

"I don't know. I'll check up with him in his tent," Dongwoo volunteered.

Dongwoo ran towards the residential bunks to hurry and find Hoya. Knowing the news that Squad 10609 was chosen to go to Sotena, it was important for Hoya to be there to not only hear the news but be present in case Captain Peo wanted to introduce him as sergeant. Most of all, anyone late to the meeting would be punished and have it placed on their record. 

Reaching Hoya and Sungjong's tent, Dongwoo yelled from behind the entrance.

"Hoya, are you in there?"

No response.

Dongwoo tried one more time.

"Hoya? You know that we have a meeting in 30 minutes, right? There's an important announcement that we're going to hear."

Once again, not another response.

There was an option that maybe Hoya was not even at his tent, but he was also a deep sleeper if he listened to music before he went to bed. Dongwoo ped their tent and entered to wake up Hoya if he was sleeping.

But instead, Dongwoo walked in on something he never thought imaginable. "HOYA, NO!"

Hoya was wearing his bulletproof vest, his eyes gray with bags and dull. Not a single sparkle came from his eyes, as if despair filled every vein of his body. He was pulling down on a belt that was hanging from the top of their bunk bed, wrapped around the pole and drooping down. At the end of the belt was a small loop made, in which Hoya was weaving his head in and tightening up the band around his neck.

"Oh my god," Dongwoo shrilled, running towards Hoya to unbuckle the belt and pull him away. The two of them collapsed to the floor, and not a moment did Hoya fight back with Dongwoo. Hoya fell into Dongwoo's arms, Dongwoo on the verge of tears as he embraced his friend as tight as possible. "Hoya, what are you doing..."

The news of Squad 10609 leaving to Sotena tonight was the final straw to Hoya's neverending nightmare. With Sungjong gone and no glimmer of hope for himself, his almost lifeless body lay on the floor in misery. "I overheard that our squad is heading to Sotena, where more than likely we'll all get killed? Are you kidding me Dongwoo?"

"You have to keep it together, Hoya. We have great people in this squad, Sunggyu, Captain Peo, you. We can play our cards right and do this."

Hoya shook his head. "I can't put on this front anymore. I'm standing on the edge, and I want to fall off."

"No, you can't do that. We're so close to winning this! We're fighting so hard, and you're doing so well, and you can't do this Hoya! Why would you even do this?" Dongwoo sobbed, hugging him tighter. 

"Are we winning if one of our own dies? Is this what I've been training for these months? I've been training to see ourselves get killed like this? I've been training to see one of my best friends get captured?" Hoya's speech slurred, monotone with no feeling.

"We don't know if Sungjong is dead yet, and you can't afford to think like this. Hoya, so many people are looking up to you and believe in you to lead us to victory. You can't lose hope when we all trust in you. This has only begun, Hoya. You can't leave before your life even starts. You can't leave everyone here, your family, friends, we all love you Hoya." Dongwoo's voice was cracking up, his tears falling on top of Hoya's head in desperation. "You can't leave me, Hoya. You can't leave me."

Hoya stayed silent, allowing for Dongwoo's passion to ease his internal pain and help him regain the determination he had.

"You wear that vest to take your life. How would your dad feel, Hoya? To know that the son who wore that vest gave up before he could even see things through?"

Talking about his dad, Hoya started to tear up himself. His dad was an important figure in his life, raising him to be competitive and to work hard for his victories. The vest he wore was a reminder to himself that life his father was always with him even after passing, and with each saved bullet impressed in the vest it also reminded him that when life gets tough it does not mean you surrender. 

"Hoya, we're going to see this through alright? Don't give up now, Hoya. Please don't give up."

Dongwoo and Hoya stayed in the tent for the rest of the meeting, crying their pain away without anything else in regard.

It was only the two of them, and Dongwoo wanted to make sure Hoya never felt like this ever again.

(((())))

Sunggyu, Woohyun, Sungyeol, and Myungsoo sat together as they watched Captain Peo reprimand Dongwoo and Hoya for missing their meeting. Captain Peo had his moments of harshness, and this was the first time that the boys had witnessed it with their own friends. They were especially worried for Hoya, since during the meeting Captain Peo wanted to introduce him to the incoming troops as sergeant. He was almost embarrassed in front of the whole base when Hoya did not show his face anywhere.

"I hope this doesn't affect too much," Sungyeol wished.

"I don't think it will. Hoya is too valuable of a person in this squad, and we need him for Sotena," Sunggyu thought. 

"Don't remind me," Sungyeol groaned, burying his face into his hands and coping with the idea of their troop heading out to Sotena at 23:00.

"I can't believe we got chosen to go. What if nuclear weapons are real? What if we enter their land, and we'll finally encounter the nuclear weapons that everyone has been spreading?" Woohyun had chills thinking about it.

Myungsoo sat there quietly, his thoughts in motion as he watched Dongwoo and Hoya bow in front of Captain Peo to leave. They started walking over to their group, their faces a lot more somber than normal. It might have been the punishment that Captain Peo brought to them, or the announcement of going to Sotena, or maybe it was still the idea of Sungjong getting captured. If their absence during the meeting was of any indication, Myungsoo could tell that something else happened between the two of them.

"How did it go?" Woohyun asked as Dongwoo and Hoya approached them.

"Minor infractions for misconduct, but we'll be ok," Dongwoo explained, putting up a fake smile to hide the fact that Hoya tried to take his life.

"So, we head out tonight huh?" Hoya clasped his hands together, trying to keep it together even though he was falling apart on the inside. 

"Yes we do," Sungyeol confirmed.

Hoya was acting strange, and Myungsoo could see it in his eyes. "Hoya, are you ok?" he asked, the first words he spoke to Hoya since their incident.

Hoya nodded his head almost robotically. "I'm ok. Something came up, so we were a little late."

"As long as it got taken care of," Sunggyu added.

Dongwoo bit his lip, wanting to tell everyone what Hoya tried to do. He had to stay strong for everyone around him, he had to stay strong for Hoya, but he was unsure he even knew what the word meant.

"Is it ok to say that I'm a little scared?" Woohyun admitted, lowering his head in shame. "You know, of going to Sotena?"

Scared was almost an understatement. 

"I'm scared," Sunggyu agreed.

"Me too," Dongwoo nodded.

"I think we're all apprehensive of the unknown. It's nothing to be ashamed about, Woohyun." Sungyeol patted on Woohyun's back. "The real war is starting, and we're not fighting against others. We're fighting against ourselves."

Sungyeol's words rang in everyone's minds like a bell, the truth that no one wanted to hear. Dongwoo and Hoya stayed close to each other, the words triggering to what they just experienced. The two of them looked at each other, and Dongwoo wrapped his arm around Hoya to comfort him. Woohyun nodded his head in agreement, realizing that the battle in Pyongyang was nothing. He felt the edges of his arm bandage at the tip of his fingers, more scars to come. Sunggyu stayed still. Many people depended on his contributions to the war, and it was a fight for himself to stay rational and do what is best for his fellow soldiers. 

And then there was Myungsoo, who was watching everyone carefully reflect on Sungyeol's words. Everyone was at a crossroad in this journey, and there were two roads to take: giving in to inner demons or fighting them. The words were true for himself, still wrapping around his head the loss of Sungjong. There was no closure. There was no justice.  Myungsoo could either accept that he was gone without knowing if he was really dead and have it eat him alive, or he could fight for his country and fight for his friend to stay alive. The odds were against him, and there was no proof that he was alive or dead.

But maybe that was what he needed to give him strength.

Myungsoo stood up, putting his hand in the middle of their circle. "We fight for Sotena, and we fight for Sungjong."

Everyone was startled by Myungsoo's sudden act of confidence.

"Seeing Sungjong taken away from me tops my list of one of the worst possible things to happen to me in my life. The demon that I'm fighting with right now is the demon telling me that they killed him. I can't live with that, especially since the last thing I saw of him was his breathing soul. I believe Sungjong is alive, and I think that our squad was chosen because it was destiny. It's destiny that we're supposed to find him. And we will. I still believe in the word infinite. We're infinite."

Myungsoo was not keen to ever speaking feelings out loud or even speaking with much symbollism, but his words might have been the boost that they all needed.

The first person to put his hand in was Hoya, firmly holding onto Myungsoo's hand with love as a friend. It was as if he was trying to apologize to Myungsoo for yesterday. "Guys, sometimes I feel like giving up. Sometimes I don't know if life is worth it anymore. But I can't give up if I have the five of you in my life. And I can't give up knowing Sungjong is out there waiting for us. This is crazy. This is insane. This is our fate. I wear my dad's vest proudly, and if I die I want to die trying."

A warmness filled Dongwoo. This was the Hoya he knew and cared about, and seeing him rediscover his courage and strength made him smile.

Of course, Dongwoo knew that if Hoya was capable of suicide once this would not be the end of it all. This was not a solution. These feelings do not disappear in a day, and Dongwoo knew that from now on he had to keep an eye out for Hoya and remind him of what he was fighting for to keep him alive. From now on, he declared that he would stay by Hoya's side to see this war through. Dongwoo put his hand in on top. "I'm in."

Woohyun followed. "Me too."

Sunggyu was next in line to put it in. "We have to remember that when things get tough, we have each other."

Sungyeol stood up as the last person to put their hand in, smiling at Myungsoo for what he had to say. "Myungsoo, sometimes you need to give yourself more credit."

Myungsoo nodded his head. "Sometimes, all we have is to believe. And this is what I believe. No one can tell me otherwise. Sungjong is alive. I feel it. We're going to find him."

(((())))

Dear Mom,

I'm writing this truck as Squad 10609 is on our way to Sotena land. Our troop was chosen to make the journey to Yundo and take over the city. We are the first Korean troop to make this journey. It is said we will reach Yundo in 11 days, along the way picking up different allied troops and going through a few selected Sotena cities to infiltrate. The other squads are staying in Pyongyang, and more troops will be joining in.

We are trying to surround Yundo in 11 days, joined by other countries in a fight to take the capital and regain freedom for China, Vietnam, everyone. 

It took us three hours to load our trucks for the journey, and our squad had much energy packing everything in. We've loaded for food, shelter, weapons, everything you can possibly think of. The first city that we are visiting is the Kanggye Military Base to pick up Squad 11405 and get more artillery for the long road ahead. With the mountainous trail we are taking, we need as much weaponry for aerial attack. 

The journey is bumpy, and many people are sleeping on this ride. Sunggyu, Dongwoo, and Hoya are in a different truck ahead of us. Sungyeol and Woohyun are sitting across from me, drool dripping from their mouths and onto each other. I should be to, but I want to write this letter.

Am I crazy for thinking Sungjong is ok? Am I crazy for thinking Sungjong is fine? I am delusional, but the last time I saw my friend he was alive. People think it's the repercussions of war that are messing with my mind, but I believe. Sungjong is tougher than people make him out to be. I believe he is still alive. I don't only believe, I know in my heart that he is alive. And so does Sunggyu, Dongwoo, Woohyun, Hoya, and Sungyeol. We all believe in Sungjong. Friendship is infinite.

Today, Sungyeol told me that I am one of the strongest people he knew. I think I'm stronger than I give myself credit for.

Sungjong, please wait for me. We're coming to save you. 

And mom, please wait for me. I am coming home when this war is over.

I love you.

Kim Myungsoo