iii. final - sweet pleasure.

chocolates.

He was going to graduate.

Soon.

And all Eun Young had was very little time.

As Eun Young was walking by the hallways, alone this time, she grabbed a strawberry-flavored lollipop out from her pocket, unwrapped it and ate it. It was the 996th lollipop of her life since 3rd grade... And the 996th time she kept on seeing and having small and short contacts with her one crush - Kim Jae Joong. It had been five years ever since. She hung her head low and lifted it up after she passed by Jae Joong. Eun Young was a second year in Junir High, while Jae Joong was about to graduate. Only a few more months and it'll all be over - She will be a third year by then. Wonderful. She bit the lollipop hardly and turned around to take a glance of him once more.

Park Ji Yoon - Je Sun's big sister.

She was a classmate of Jae Joong, a fourth year too.

"They do look good together." Eun Young mumbled and stared at the two. People had been complementing the two's chemistry. They were always together, laughing, chatting, having fun... Nobody knows if it was true or not, but rumors were spreading that they were dating. He likes noonas anyway. Eun Young closed her eyes and walked the path ahead towards her. She felt a slight sting in her chest, she was full of thought and her mind was so fuzzy and blank. She did nothing but walk ahead towards her, even going pass through her own classroom. "Spacing out a lot, huh?" Je Sun suddenly appeared next to her and dragged her back to the classroom she missed. "Yeah..." She was even more quiet than usual, if that was possible. Je Sun looked at her with a worried expression, "What's the problem...?" She knew Eun Young was troubled, she was too quiet today and too sunk deep into her thoughts. Eun Young was thinking too much today - And thinking too much in a day was never good.

"...I only have 3 months left, Je Sun... 3 months." Eun Young whispered, her eyes distant.

Je Sun sighed and sat next to her, thinking of any ideas to cheer up the girl. She had her cheek on her palm with a pout.

"Well, you could just tell him now. You know..." Je Sun knew, after 5 years she finally knew that Eun Young had a secret love for Jae Joong. For 5 straight years, Eun Young had been chewing on, eating and savoring sweets all for him. And Je Sun knew it was weird for someone like Eun Young to suddenly switch from normal and spicy-flavored foods to sweet ones. I hope you get back to your normal self again... I don't like seeing you like this.

Eun Young was depressed - Too depressed for all she cared. "I can't tell him now. I couldn't." Eun Young bit her bottom lip.

"After 5 years he finally knew. Now we're awkward and all, even my brother. I couldn't even look and talk at him straight, when I'm known for doing so... Why did it even spread!? I was keeping it to myself for all those years so that our relationship wouldn't get ruined... So that we could talk normally again, and yet, this happens!?" Eun Young restrained herself from shedding tears. She grabbed her hair and gritted her teeth. Je Sun's forehead cringed and she circled Eun Young's back. "It's going to be fine. I'm sure even if he finally knew, he doesn't hate you. He would never hate you for liking him... You're not that kind of person people could hold a grudge with, even though you seem cold and emotionless, you have a warm heart." Je Sun consoled the girl.

"How could you prove that?"

"You loved Jae Joong for half of your life, right?"

"Yeah right... I have a one-sided and unrequited love, that's all."

"At least it made you change, right?" Je Sun smiled softly.

"I didn't change, not at all. The only thing that changed with me was that my sweeth tooth was awakened, and I couldn't stop eating lollipop whenever I see him... I just, I'm hopeless." Eun Young pushed her tears back and put her head on the table. Je Sun felt silent, she couldn't help Eun Young with her problem anymore. "Je Sun..." She lifted her head and ordered her, "Go buy me sweets. Lots. Especially that strawberry-flavored lolliopop." "Why?" Je Sun asked, "Because sweets could lift your spirits up, that's what you said so, right?" She informed. "Oh yeah~" Je Sun stood up and ran towards the cafeteria. With Je Sun gone, she grabbed the wrapper she had earlier and made folds and creases with it - Like an origami.

996. Eun young counted as she did the last fold and lifted it up to the light with her index finger and thumb.

It was an origami lucky star.

Pretty as always... Her eyes squinted as she took out a jar filled with the other 995 folded origamis and put the 996th in it. She stared at the jar and frowned. 4 more to go. Eun Young spinned the jar over and over until she took a clear glimpse of every single star she had been making for the last 5 years. What were the stars for? Eun Young had been collecting all the lollipop wrappers she had eaten in the past and would always form them into little lucky stars everytime she would finish eating a lollipop. Everytime she would see Jae Joong's form and structure goes a lollipop wrapper in the jar. Another one goes in the jar in a star shape if she talked to him or made any contact. 

A thousand of these and your wish would be granted... Any kind of wish.

Eun Young sighed. How did I even start believing in these kinds of things? She wasn't the type to believe in rumors, urban legends, or anything else. She didn't care about everything around her, until one man came to her life and gave her a single lollipop, then everything changed - Her personality, attitude, beliefs, her point of view, her dislike for sweets and anything with sugar in it... Everything. 

I wonder, how many lollipop I could eat in a month?

How many times would I see him?

How many stars would be formed in 91 days?

There were too much questions in Eun Young's mind left to be answered, but very few were. She felt light headed and started dozing off. "I wish I could have a thousand, and wish very soon..." She muttered.

A month passed and only a star was formed.

She only saw Jae Joong for one time.

It's cold today. Eun Young tigthened her grip on her scarf and kept on walking towards the school gate. The time she reached her classroom, she met Je Sun who waved at her. "What's with you? You're red... Did you see him today?" She tilted her head, "No... Just, caught a cold I guess." Eun Young looked down, "Yeah, it does feel chilly today, and in the middle of this month, too." Je Sun scratched her head.

2 more months.

And three more stars.

"Anyways, here." Je Sun placed three special-flavored lollipops on Eun Young's palm. She blinked at it, "Chocolate?" Eun Young asked and twirled the handle, staring at it. "Yeah, it tastes good. And I thought that you should have a change in flavor of the lollipop." Je Sun grinned enthusiastically. "...Thanks." She tucked it in her pocket and walked towards her seat. Chocolate, huh? Never heard of it. She made a gag and laughed at her own joke to herself. Time passed by and came lunch. Je Sun and Eun Young were about to head by the cafeteria until - "Eun Young~ Someone's calling for you." Eun Young stared at the door, stood up from her seat and walked towards it, "He said to meet by the rooftop." The girl informed. "Another confession?" Je Sun asked while Eun Young only nodded for a response. "Aw, I want one."

"What?" Eun Young asked, "A confession." Je Sun answered. Eun Young suddenly let out a sarcastic laugh, "I can guess from who..."

"Yah! What's so wrong with liking Yoo Chun-oppa!? Not only he has a great voice, but he has great acting skills!"

"All I could see is an average guy who gets stage fright." Eun Young grinned, tucking her cold hands in her pocket while Je Sun pushed her by the arm, "He's not average... He's hot!" Je Sun giggled as she spazzed over Yoo Chun's existence. "Like Jae Joong-oppa?" Eun Young suddenly blurted out while Je Sun blinked at her, thrice. "Like Jae Joong-oppa." She answered back with an eye-smile. "...Yeah." Eun Young flashed out a soft and genuine smile - The rare ones. Je Sun stood frozen for a moment while the latter walked four steps ahead leading to the rooftop, "You go on first, I'll follow after I finish this." She waved a little at the statue-like Je Sun.

"It's been a while since I saw her smile like that." Je Sun giggled to herself and started walking to the cafeteria. "I had to owe you this one, Jae Joong-oppa... Thanks." She kept on talking to herself. I wonder, if you, Jae Joong-oppa would leave, will her smile too leave like a bubble? Je Sun felt a sudden change of mood for a moment. I hope not.

While Je Sun proceeded to the cafeteria, Eun Young was already on the rooftop, in front of her was a third year, ready to speak out his mind. "Ah, Eun Young-ssi..." He suddenly blurted out, while Eun Young had her usual pokerface on. Her hard mask always activates whenever a confession was held. "What is it sunbae?" She asked as the man who told her his feelings, "I... I like you, that is... You know..." He scratched the back of his neck, while the cold, morning breeze blew in between the two. They were distant - Distant enough that seven people could fill in their distance. Eun Young kept quiet for a while and gave him her reply, "I'm sorry... But I have another person that I like." Eun Young explained and bowed at her sunbae. He stood there, rootted on his spot while the girl turned around to make her leave. She reached out for the door's handle, and for a while, Eun Young turned around once more. The third year noticed this and lifted his head that resulted from him being rejected. "Oh yeah... I forgot to tell you."

"I'm sorry... But thank you for liking me. I appreciate it." Eun Young opened the door and left the rooftop.

It was true. Eun Young did change. She would never turn her back around and say thanks like that in a confession.

While walking down the stairs to go to the cafeteria, her head felt fuzzy and light. "Wha... My head hurts..." Her eyes twitched and her whole body flinched. Eun Young massaged her forehead, while not looking at the stairs, she missed a step and slipped, falling from it. Her eyesight turned dark, everything around her did. Eun Young's eyes closed as she fainted and collasped on the stairs.

3 more... Lollipops...

"What~!? You like Jae Joong!? Wow, I never knew you would like him!"

"I thought the "Ice Princess" doesn't like anyone, but now she does... Unbelievable!"

"Please, don't say anything further...!"

"Hey~ What are you guys talking about?"

"Jae Joong! You should hear of this! Your beloved hoobae - "

"Wha...! What do you mean beloved!? I don't - "

"Okay, okay... Just let me speak - Eun Young here had been crushing on you, for 5 straight years!"

"No... No... No!"

"Gah!" Eun Young woke up, and all she saw was the blue ceiling in front of her. She was in her room, at the house, out of the school, and not in the rooftop... What happened? "Agh..." She massaged her head again, the stinging feeling didn't stop until she took a deep breath and calmed down. "Why... Where am I...?" She took a look around. As expected, she was in her room. "Did I...?" "Ah! You're finally awake!" Je Sun screamed as her eyes rounded when she entered her room and opened the door.  She neared Eun Young's table and hugged her out of the blue. "I was worried, did you know that!? Geez, don't worry me like that anymore, okay!?" Je Sun's eyebrows were cringed and her way of talking was faster than usual. "Don't worry... I won't." Eun Young smiled gently, "Yah! You didn't tell me that you have a fever! And it was so high!" She didn't stop scolding her like she was Eun Young's mother. She kept on babbling and spitting out words while Eun Young only nodded in response. "I did tell you I have a cold." Eun Young pouted, "But I didn't know it was worse!" Je Sun backfired. She noticed that her continuous talking made Eun Young very silent. To cheer her up, she calmed down and talked in a slower pace.

"You know what?" 

"What?" Eun Young blinked at her.

"Jae Joong-oppa heard the news... Though he wasn't the one who lifted and carried you home from the stairs, you know what he did?"

Eun Young's eyes were pleading, wanting to hear more - She was interested.

"I was in the classroom, fixing your things... Then he entered and neared me, he then asked, "Is this Eun Youngie's bag?" He pointed at your bag and I nodded, he then took it and and got out of the room."

Thump.

Eun Young's heart was stinging again.

"It seems that he delivered your bag for you up 'till your house! Hehe~ The scene was so cute! And his face, too! It seemed like he was very worried when he heared that you suddenly fainted out of nowhere. And he even called you by your nickname!  And then, wah - !" 

Je Sun suddenly stood from her spot as Eun Young ran out still in her school uniform. 

"What are you doing!?" She tried to chase her, "You're still weak and - " "I know!" Eun Young shouted back, not even looking back to answer Je Sun, "I have to!" I might be weak, but I'm not that weak to let him know how I feel... I only have this opportunity and I wouldn't waste it. She left the house and ran towards the school, leaving Je Sun there with nothing to use to be able to stop the rushing girl. "Geez, this kid...!" She scratched her hair furiously; teary-eyed, she then smiled. You jerk, and here you were losing all the hope in the world. Don't run too fast or you'll scratch your face... If that ever happens, I won't be your friend anymore. She teased. 

Eun Young kept on running - Merely running towards the school. It was 3 pm, and everyone would be going home by then. As she ran so fast, she slipped and got a cut on her knee. Though it hurt, she didn't care. She kept on running without one shoe on. "Three..." She got a the chocolate-flavored lollipop and ate it, while running, she did the same with the other lollipops she had - She folded them into lucky stars. "Two..." Eun Young finished her first lollipop fast and proceeded with the second, folding it again. The time she finished, she reached the school, gaining almost all of the student's attentions. They were staring at her state - Messy hair all over her face, a dirty school uniform with one shoe on and a cut on her knee. She didn't care, she kept on finding for the only person she wanted it see at that point of time. 

Kim Jae Joong.

I wanted to tell him... I want to see him. I want to feel his warm and big hands patting my head - I want to have another friendly conversation with him... I want to see his smile once more, the butterflies on my stomach, the burning feeling on my cheeks, the wonderful aura he emits, the feeling I get whenever I see his form... The sweetess of his grin, as sweet as this chocolate... I want them back. Eun Young's eyes started welling up, blurring her vision. Her tears fell as she kept running and her dry cheeks became wet as her tears fell down. I want Jae Joong-oppa to know how I feel.

"Jae Joong-oppa!" She shouted as she halted running and faced Jae Joong's back.

One...

He turned around and saw Eun Young's pitiful condition. She was panting very heavily, her heartbeat out of pace, hands balled into a fist and face full of tears. His eyes widened as he slowly approached the girl, "What happened - " "Wait! Stop! Just... Stay there... Please..." She pleaded and wiped off the drops of salty water from her face. She felt them on her lips, she tasted them - They were too salty... Or was it because she now preferred sweets over spicy ones? Sugar over salt? Jae Joong's lips opened slightly, "Eun Youngie... You..."

"Jae Joong-oppa. I have been wanting to tell you this for a long time... Could you please listen to me?"

For five long years, I was taking on the taste of sugars that I had been hating on for half of my life.

And for that half of my life... Sweets finally grew into me.

"Sure..."

But out of all the sweets I tasted, one stood out the most.

It was so sweet... Like the guy in front of me.

"I... like, no... I love you..."

The sweet pleasure never escaped my lips.

"...That's all."

"...I'm sorry, but I can't answer back to your feelings..."

The 1000th star was something special... So special, I had to make a wish with it.

"Goodbye."

Dear star, if you could please grant me one wish, then please...

Let me not forget this one feeling in my heart.

Please, always... I wish that I would always, bit by bit, love this sweet pleasure I feel.

Life is like a box of chocolates, you would never know what you would get.

Well, I think I found out what I got.

Dark Chocolate.

Something sweet, yet bitter...

Bittersweet.

Two years passed.

1999. Eun Young munched on the milk chocolate she had on the table a few seconds ago. "Ah! I know this actress!" She blurted out as she watched TV, sitting on the sofa comfortably. Life of a fourth year high school student was fun... Friday was an assignment-free day, so she would always watch soap operas and variety shows every Saturday while munching on sweets she hated for the past years of her life.

Eun Young changed. A whole lot.

"Eun Young. Stop eating sweets! Your teeth would have cavities!" Chang Min shouted as he saw the mess in the living room the time he entered the house. He was in senior high now, and studied in a different school along with his gang. "I thought you have Saturday classes?" Eun Young flung her head back to see his annoyed expression, "Why do you care anyway!?" Chang Min shouted back, frustrated. Though Eun Young changed, the two sibling's relationships didn't change. Hate-hate relationship - still the same. "Like I care~" She shouted and got back to her show. "Geez..." Chang Min slapped his forehead and removed his shoes to enter the house. "Clean up, kid. We have a guest."

"I don't want to clean up~!!!" Eun Young complained and kept on eating a chocolate. She threw the wrapper on the table. 2000. Huh, I'm already finished? Wish! Wish! Wish! Eun Young fixed her seating formation, forgetting that she was slouching a while back. She sat straight and closed her eyes. Okay, what to wish for? 

The guest then entered the house and neared the living room, it's messy state caught his attention.

"Ah! Chocolates~ Chang Min-ah! I never knew you had so many!" He talked to no one and neared the bowl of chocolates, beside it was a jar of chocolate wrappers shaped into a star.

I wish I... Ah!

Eun Young saw a hand in front of her. She raised her head and her nose touched another man's nose. They were so close - So close! Eun Young blinked twice as the guy bended over to take a chocolate, not noticing their lips brushed against each other a bit.

"Ah... Eun Youngie...!?"

"Jae Joong-oppa..."

The time the 2000th star was made, Eun Young made a wish. He's back... Thank you...

I wish that the softness of his lips, the taste of chocolate, and this sweet, sweet pleasure would never leave me.

THE END.