HeLa

This is my fourth letter to you, but I haven’t received a response yet. I don’t want to scare you or anything, Baekhyun… I just need to write to you. You’re the only person who has listened to me, while there was no one to hear. I’m sorry. I just… I need to take a break, get some tea and try to figure out what’s wrong with me. Okay?

You told me you were sick, but everything was okay. Should I really believe that? I don’t know. I just, I think about you all the time. It’s getting inside my head, like an infection. A good one, I suppose. I don’t even know what you look like. Maybe that’s for the best. Because, if I did, my dreams would have a face. Ah, who am I to be telling you this. I’m going mad, that’s the honest truth.

I ended my second letter with a rather good ending. I don’t know what to feel about that now. Maybe it’s my fault, but I feel like I'm alone. Because I live by myself, I don’t fall under the care of my family anymore and if I really want to talk to someone… It has to be coming from me. It’s like there’s this wall inside my head that keeps preventing me from feeling normal.

I never feel normal. I know people are alwa