But that was 4 or 5 years ago. I'm in college now, and I should settle down and be happy. I realize that he's never going to come back, but I just really do miss him. If only I could leave him as easy as he left me. But hey, don't get me wrong, just because I was in love with a guy before, doesn't mean much. I still like girls.

"Oppa~ why won't you date me? I'm the hottest girl on campus. You can't deny me!" It's girls like these who I don't like. The girls who aren't simple, the girls who have too much ego.

"Hyung~ you don't like girls. I know it's because you like me. I know it's hard to hide your lust for me but I know you like me. I like you too. I'll show you." It's men like these who don't have much to do, who can't describe how they feel, who think they can express like in that I don't like either. I don't even have interest in men, what the ?

Basically, I just don't like people who are too blunt and like to rush things without thought. Kibum was never--

*sigh* I need to forget, I need to forget so bad. Even if 4 or 5 years have passed, the pain and the missing hasn't left.

------In class.

Professer just talks and talks. I don't really learn in this stupid class. I just sit there and draw. I never study for the mid-terms, for the finals, for anything. But yet, I still pass. Professer is really stupid too. He doesn't know what his class does, he doesn't handle the class. 

All the girls in this class stare at me like I'm some famous . I guess it's because of the way I sit. My arm is extended out, one hand is on my lap or somewhere else. I pull my chair back sometimes. I cover my face with by rushing my fingers through my hair so no one can see me or my hand. I guess it's partly that. Or they've never seen a handsome man before. 

Sometimes when I look at them, they smile or blush. It makes me laugh. Not because they're cute or something but because they look so stupid. They don't take anything seriously. 

I sometimes write stories in class about how a new girl comes in, with a good attitude, who's hardcore bad , not cutesy and nice. She's nice though, but she seems bad. She will sit next to my empty seat and won't bother to say hello. But she'll look at me. And I'll look back and down. She doesn't scare me. She challenges me.

One day though, one day.