Jaejoong's appointment with Dr. Lee on the next morning was quite short.

Dr. Lee decided that he will not put Jaejoong in trance for the next meetings, since his body had to recover from the newly gained experiences. Jaejoong's faint concerned him and he didn't want to overburden him.

So on this day, they just talked about the happenings and Dr. Lee encouraged Jaejoong to continue the therapy.

„Now we can be sure that the reason for your fear lays in your childhood.“, Dr. Lee stated with his typical calm smile while he put on his glasses. „What did you say: How old was your younger self in the white room?“

Jaejoong frowned a little and shrugged his shoulders. „I don't know“, he answered honestly and sighted. „Maybe eight or nine... maybe even ten“, he mumbled silently and looked at his therapist.

„You came into the children's home when you were nine, right?“, Dr. Lee asked and wrote a short note on a sheet of paper.

Jaejoong nodded. „I was nine when my parents adopted me and previously I was about half a year in the children's home.“

Dr. Lee nodded lost in thoughts and continued to take notes on the paper. Jaejoong frowned again and leaned over the desk to look at what Dr. Lee was writing.

„What is this?“, he asked both curious and surprised, while he eyed the complicated chart with scribbled words, lots of arrows and a multiplicy of circles. Dr. Lee raised his head and smiled slightly.

„I just wanted to illustrate the pieces of information that we got until today“, he said and laughed silently, when he saw Jaejoong's doubtful look.

„Noone is able to understand this“, Jaejoong mumbled and tipped with his forefinger on the weird chart. He placed his arms on the chair's rests and looked at his therapist.

During the last weeks, he started to trust Dr. Lee and he couldn't deny his gratefulness towards the elder man. It was obvious, that his therapist tried to do his best to help Jaejoong and even if he wasn't an easy patient, Dr. Lee kept his calmness and patience to support him.

„It's not that bad...“, Dr. Lee muttered with faked anger and winked at Jaejoong, before he turned the sheet around and pointed with his pen on the graphic's middle. „Okay, let's talk through the facts. We know that the root is in your childhood, about the age of eight or nine.“

Dr. Lee let his pencil slid towards an unreadable word on the left.

„We can conclude, that it happened shortly before the police picked you up and brought you to the children's home. Otherwise, little-Jaejoong in your white room would be possibly younger or elder.“

Jaejoong viewed the next spot on which Dr. Lee was pointing and nodded slightly.

Dr. Lee popped out the lead of his pen and encircled the whole right part of the graphic.

„This is what we got only by considering the room in which you are during trance. Both the room and the clothes you and your younger self are wearing are white – this is a typical sign for cleanliness and innocence. Innocence indicates your childhood again – this is easy – but I'm not sure about the cleanliness yet. My assumption is that you have had an orderly family background before the incident happened – but this is just very airy.“

Dr. Lee tipped with his pen on the sheet and leaned back on his chair.

„Can you comprehend this, Jaejoong?“

Jaejoong had knitted his eyebrows a little, but he nodded in agreement and continued to eye the chart. He looked at the next point and nodded again. „I was disturbed by the door because it ruined my perfect room“, he mumbled silently and raised his eyebrows a little. „So, this incident – the thing behind the door – disturbed my perfect life, when we follow your assumption“, he concluded silently and raised his head to look at Dr. Lee.

Approvingly, the elder man nodded his head and smiled. „Hey, you could become a therapist“, he kidded with a silent chuckle and leaned over the chart again. „You are right, this was my approach, too.“, he said and looked at the next point.

„Besides, we know that the incident concerns your mother – the little Jaejoong insisted that your mother is behind the door and that she won't harm you when you open the door. The question thar arises from this, is that we do not know why you – the old Jaejoong – is afraid of it and why the young Jaejoong isn't.“

Jaejoong took a deep breath and shrugged his shoulders helplessly. „I don't know“, he mumbled silently and kept his eyes on the chart. He tried to remember every single word he and little-Jaejoong exchanged, but all he remembered was only fragmentary and blurred.

„But why did he consist on opening the door?“, he asked Dr. Lee and looked at his therapist. The elder man smiled openly. „Ah, I forgot to mention this, I'm sorry, Jaejoong!“, he said brightly and took off his glasses. „This is a good indication, how could I forget this? It's an obvious sign that you're mind reacts to the therapy, Jaejoong. Your younger self wants you to remember, so there is a good chance for you to recover“, he said smiling and grabbed the edge of his white overall to clean his glasses.

„Is there anything else that we know yet?“, Jaejoong asked silently and glanced at the chart again, but as far as he could decipher his therapist's handwriting, they had already mentioned all points. Confirming his thoughts, Dr. Lee shook his head and put on his glasses again – Jaejoong resolved to count how often Dr. Lee took off and put on his glasses in the next meeting.

„This is all we know yet, but it is already a good – “ Dr. Lee interrupted himself and his glance became absent. He seemed to think about anything, before he quickly grabbed a clean sheet of paper and started to write something down. Jaejoong frowned a little and leaned forward, but he wasn't able to read Dr. Lee's handwriting again. „What?“, he asked a little impatient, but Dr. Lee only shook his head and continued writing.

After some seconds, the therapist laid down his pen and eyed the scribbled notes he took. „I just remembered something...“, he mumbled silently and Jaejoong had to apply himself on understand him. „You have harkened on the door, right?“, he asked Jaejoong and gained another nod as an answer.

„I hope I'm not over-interpreting something, but obviously it was nothing that your mother did or said that caused the incident.“, he mumbled and looked into Jaejoong's eyes. „Otherwise, you might have heard anything...“

Right after this, Dr. Lee shook his head and scrunched the paper up. „No, this is too airy“, he said a little angered and threw the paper into the garbage can.

Jaejoong shrugged his shoulders. „It's possible“, he stated quietly and looked at his therapist.

Dr. Lee threw a brief glance at the clock on his desk and smiled again. „Maybe we better end this appointment here“, he said towards Jaejoong and stood up from his office chair. „Or do you have any further questions?“

Jaejoong shook his head and got onto his feet. „I think this is enough input for today“, he said with a wry smile and said goodbye, before he left Dr. Lee's office and headed to his own room.

He didn't know why, but today's appointment encouraged him a little. Actually, he thought that they had achieved nothing until now, but due to the chart of Dr. Lee, they had already discovered a lot.

However, Jaejoong was glad that he didn't have his hypnotherapy for the next days. It had always been really exhausting and after the last therapy, he was kind of afraid of panicing again.

When Jaejoong had nearly reached his room, he spontaneously changed his direction and went up to Heechul. He hadn't met his friend for breakfast today which was quite unusual. Actually, Kim Heechul would never miss a meal.

Jaejoong knocked on Heechul's door and frowned a little, when he didn't get an answer. 'Maybe he has an appointment', he thought to himself, but tentatively he pushed down the handle and the door swung open.

He found Heechul sitting on the bed, while his hands were nervously playing with his mobile phone. Jaejoong raised his left eyebrow and entered the room.

„Hey“, he greeted when Heechul didn't react on him and sat down next to his friend on the mattress. „Where had you been? I missed you during breakfast“, Jaejoong said and playfully punched Heechul's shoulder, but the elder man didn't react again.

„Heechul?“

„Siwon didn't call“, Heechul mumbled silently and looked down on his mobile phone. „It is already 11 a.m. and he didn't call.“

Jaejoong shrugged his shoulders and looked at his friend. „Did he say that he will call you this morning?“

„He always calls me at 10.30 a.m.“, Heechul mumbled without answering his question directly. He lifted up his phone and pushed the redialing-button. About a minute passed, until Heechul lowered his phone again and ended the call, obviously without any success.

„Maybe he's busy“, Jaejoong suggested casually but Heechul immediately shook his head.
„He is never too busy to call“, he mumbled quietly and hung his head. „If he has no time to call me at 10.30, he either calls me earlier or he writes me a short message with another time he will call me“, he continued mumbling and Jaejoong became a little concerned.

Heechul's voice was completely expressionless and his posture made him appear extremly weak and vulnerable right now.

„Hey, don't worry...“, Jaejoong said as calming as possible and wrapped his arm around Heechul's thin shoulders. „He comes around this evening and then he will explain why he didn't call you. Or he calls you at 12 a.m. or 2 p.m. or I don't know when. I'm sure he is just too busy right now...“

„And if he won't come today?“

Jaejoong couldn't help chuckling. „Siwon ALWAYS comes to see you, Heechul“, he said with a soft smile, but the expression on Heechul's face made him stumble. „Heechul, did anything happen...?“

„We... we just talked yesterday“, Heechul mumbled scarcely audible and kept his eyes on the floor. „He called me because I missed our date yesterday and we talked and suddenly I looked at the photo and I thought of Hangeng and I asked Siwon but he became angry and he said that it's my fault and that I'm screwing him and then I said, no, you know that I love Hangeng, and he then he blamed me again and I became angry and said that he's not doing enough and then he kept silent and said goodbye and ended the call and now he didn't call me and I'm sure he won't come today because he's angry and if he doesn't come, I'll be alone and maybe he's never going to visit me again and – “

The speed of Heechul's words increased more and more and made it hard for Jaejoong to understand them properly. When Heechul interrupted himself, tears built up in his dark eyes and he caved in even more. Obviously, not only these words had left Heechul's body, but also all his power and strength. He seemed like a little child right now and Jaejoong had to swallow hard.

He pulled his friend closer and started to rock him a little.

„You have probably hurt him very much, Heechul“, he mumbled silently and felt Heechul's body wince at his words. Jaejoong raised his hand and over Heechul's dark hair.

„I know...“, Heechul whispered and some tears ran down his pale cheeks. „I didn't mean to...“

Jaejoong nodded slightly and leaned his forehead against Heechul's temple. „You talked faster than your brain was working, mh?“, he asked silently and sighted deeply.

„I know it's hard, but you have to tell him that he is only a friend for you, okay, Heechul?“

„But maybe he isn't...“

Jaejoong detached himself from Heechul and looked surprised into his friend's teary eyes. A soft smile appeared on his face while he wiped a tear off Heechul's cheek. „Than where's the problem?“

„I love Hangeng...“

„But does this exclude a possible love for Siwon?“

Jaejoong's words made Heechul frown a little. He sobbed silently and wiped away the tears that were still in the corners of his eyes. Jaejoong laughed silently and looked at his friend.

„You know... noone forgets his first love, Heechul. And even if you still feel the same for Hangeng than during your relationship – what is perfectly okay, don't get me wrong – you can love someone else, too. Maybe Siwon is not your first love and maybe you don't love him as much as Hangeng yet, but don't you think you could be happy with him?“

„But you can't love two people at once...“

„Is your love towards Hangeng in your heart or in your head?“, Jaejoong asked winking and still with a soft smile on his pretty face. The expression that appeared on Heechul's face, made clear that he already knew the answer.

"Think about it, Heechul", he added and over Heechul's hair again, before he left him alone and went to his own room again

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I thought I need to sum up the therapy's success, I started to confuse myself, haha!