The sun was shining brightly through the window. The sun races filled the room, reaching every corner and spot in the place. The warmth of the sun light hit my face and my eye lids, very slowly, opened heavy from the sleep. I blinked a few times trying to throw away the leftovers of sleepiness. I got up from the bed and stretched my numb body and my throat left a groan while doing so.

Suddenly a knock on the door was heard and a head picked through the half closed door.

“Good morning my angel. Can I come in?’’ I nodded and he came in wearing his business suit. The bed sank under his weight and he wrapped his arms around me, me resting my head on his chest.

“Good morning dad.” My voice was husky. I snuggled closer to my dad’s chest and closed my eyes again. He kissed gently my forehead and rubbed his hand up and down my back.

“Did you sleep well honey?’’

“Yes. Like a baby.’’ I told him and kissed his cheek. He looked at me and smiled softly, while caressing my hair which was falling messily down the length of my waist.

“Did you have any nightmares?’’ His voice became a little hoarse. I just shook my head and sniffed the scent of his fragrance. Oh, how much I loved his smell. It always used to hypnotize me and calm me down. When I was a little girl, whenever I got scared in the dark he would always lie next to me and sing. His scent entered my nostrils and I fell asleep in his arms quietly. He is doing the same since then. But now it was different. He would always come and calm his crazy daughter, who was losing herself in her own dreams, every single night.

I would always torture him. This is what I thought I was for him a burden to his life, to his work. I hated it when I was watching his horrified face when he was trying to convince me that everything was a bad dream. I hated it when I was making him cry. Sometimes I was observing him holding the picture of our family. My mom pregnant in his arms and me on my brothers back laughing at the camera. Sometimes I really wanted to find a way to disburden his life.

 But then how could I live him alone in this world? How could I sound so selfish? My dad and I know better than anyone that in this life we got… you should never give up. Giving up is like burying your own self in a world of darkness. Somewhere that nothing exist. Only numbness.

Sometimes I feel that, this world is a nightmare and I can’t wake up. Worse than the dreams I have. Sometimes I feel that I will never escape this dark path. But what if I don’t want to escape?

Just then I thought of my unjustly shed mom. Back then when my father was falling asleep in bed she would always put a blanket over us and kiss our foreheads. How much love could this woman carry in her heart, I didn’t know. Her memory reminded me to stay strong. For her, for my father, but the pain… so sharp like thousands of needles piercing my body… rushed through me. My heart ached. I shut my eyes tightly and I feasted on my dad’s dress shirt.

“Do you have any training today?” He asked interrupting my thoughts.

“Yes an hour of sharpshooting.” I told letting out a sigh.

“Don’t exhaust yourself baby! Please promise me that you will relax today. Go out with your friends. Do something else. It’s Saturday for God’s sake!” He said the worry evidence in his voice.

“Yes Mr. Speeches. Don’t worry I don’t have anything else to do anyway. Are you going to be late tonight?” I asked him. He let out a chuckle to the nickname I gave him and stood up.

“Yes. I’m so sorry Lynn. I should spend more time with you I know. I…”

“Dad what have I told you? You don’t have to be guilty. I’m fine. I just asked you if you’re gonna be late tonight that’s all.” I beamed at him.

“I don’t want you to be alone.” He said, his head hanging low.

“Is Kris going to come along?’’ I asked him and he nodded. I hummed at him and then said: “Then I won’t be alone. Now go. As the head of the company you have duties. I love you! Bye.” I kissed him and pushed him out of the door.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….............................

“Open your legs and place them parallel to each other, as the length of your shoulders.” I listened to the instructions carefully and did what my trainer said.

“Keep your back straight like you have swallowed a stick.” I chuckled at the comparison.

“Concentrate and no giggling! Now, add a slight curvature to your torso, bending to the front.” He commanded straightforwardly.

“Yes sir!” I saluted him with a smile. I saw him hid a grin.

“Now, lift the gun and aim your target. Remember don’t shoot straight to the stimulator. Make sure that the gun is aligned with your target. Nice! Now shoot.'' He encouraged me.

I closed my eyes and inhaled, through my nose, the cool air. I formed my body, taking the right position and aimed. Then my finger was on trigger. I pulled it and my body recoiled, as the bullet left the gun barrel. Everything happened in mere seconds and the bullet had already found its destination. The head.

A smirk formed on my lips. I could hear the clap of praising of my teacher, while I was disarming my weapon.

Behind me I could hear people murmuring, but I didn't give any more matter to that. Then my teacher called for me.

''Lynn, there's someone I'd like you to meet.'' I placed down my stuff and approached my teacher. There was another man standing next to him. His head was turned to one side and I couldn't identify him.

He wasn't very tall, but he had blond hair and very handsome features. When he turned his head our eyes locked and I just froze on the spot. He stared at me in the eye and a smile was plastered on his face. The smile was friendly enough for everyone who would just take a small glimpse. The friendliness was reflected in his eyes, too. However, not being easily convinced anymore, I searched deeper. But what surprised me was that I didn’t find anything. A complete emptiness. Nothing. Not even a slight emotion. My heartbeat accelerated while I was staring into his eyes.

“Um, Lynn-ah? Are you ok?’’ My eyes unfocused and I blinked fast. Not being able to form a coherent word I just nodded and excused myself making my way to them.

“Lynn-ah, I’d like you to meet Kim YooKnown. He is one of my old students.”  My trainer introduced us and we bowed to each other. I smiled keeping the poker face on, trying not to show my agitation.

“It’s nice to meet you Mr. Kim.” The restlessness showed even more when we shook hands. I was trembling and I couldn’t explain why. My palms were sweating and turned ice cold in an instance.

“ It’s nice to meet you too, Lynn.” My name came out of his lips like a hiss, which sent shivers down my spine. “No need to be that formal. I bet that I’m just a few years older. Please just call me U-know.” He told me with a grin.

“If you don’t mind I’d rather stay at the neutrals, YooKnow- shi.” I said and a small giggle escaped his lips.

“Tough, isn’t she?” Mr. Known told his ex-student. “Anyway, Lynn U-Know is going to be your trainer whenever I’m gone, because this year many issues came up which I have to take care of.”

“ Is everything fine Lynn? Is there any problem with that?” My head shot up immediately, looking intensely.

“N-no. It’s ok. It’s not my business either way.” I said smiling awkwardly. Suddenly my phone buzzed through my purse. I excused myself letting the two others chat. I picked up my cell and looked at the caller’s ID while placing a strand of hair behind my ear.

My eyes lit up and beamed stupidly while I stared at the screen. I dragged the button on the screen and brought the phone on my ear.

“Good morning. How are you?” I said still smiling.

“Good morning to you, too. I’m fine. How are you?” I could hear his voice a bit groggy and chuckled. I was sure that he had just woken up.   

“Jongup, did you just wake up?” I heard the silence on the other side of the line. But then a flopping sound was heard.

“How would you know? Jesus girl, what are you a psychic?” We laughed together and I felt my heart quicken its beats. I knew that with all the training they had, they couldn’t rest or sleep properly. But I couldn’t be more flattered. He was probably still in bed but no matter he called.

“So what are you doing today?”

“Nothing really. I just finished some training and I’m going to turn back home. Why? Do you have… anything in mind?” I asked him changing my weight on my feet.

“Well I thought that maybe we could… you know… go somewhere. Today I have a day off. It’s Saturday anyway. I want to relax!”  I pulled the phone off my ear laughing at the not so manly sound he made.

“Ok, ok don’t shout pabo. What time do you want to meet?” I asked him still hearing his chuckles. I couldn’t really believe that we were friends. After two months, after our meeting at the shopping mall we stayed in touch. And not only with Jongup, but with all the members of B.A.P. Not to mention the special friendship Daehyun and I were in. I don’t know but he had something intriguing, that it just attracted me. He was a real teaser and had a massive craze about food. I already knew that. But sometimes he was really going overboard. He was always fighting with Youngjae, with who… Youngjae his best friend, just for a piece of meat.

“ How about I pass by your house in two hours and pick you up?”  “What the hell is wrong with me?” I thought to myself. My heart wouldn’t dare to calm down and that irritated me. My cheeks hurt from all the smiling and burned from the blood that rushed upwards. My ear burned from the radiation of my phone. Maybe not just from that.

“Yeah that would be great