"Because love is something that I will always remember."

✧✧✧✧✧

     The first two weeks of classes for Himchan flew like a breeze. Ever since he met ‘the gang’, he rekindled the confidence he once had when he lived in the city. He had a weird mentality that he could only make new friends when he already has his own group of friends. Peculiar method, but it worked. It that span of two weeks, he was already acquainted to most of his batch and a handful of students from the lower batches. Himchan wanted to be friends with a lot of people and a lot of people wanted to be friends with him. Simply put, he’s already becoming the talk of the school and a candidate for the ‘stud of the school year’ not only because of his ability to socialize with just about anyone, but his looks play an immense role in his rising popularity.

     Even if he already had a ‘title’ the only people he really hung out with was no other than the first four people whom he met the very first day and two students from the batch before his. Junhong and Jongup.

     Now, he met those two rascals when he mistakenly entered a class that he was not supposed to be in. On his way to the traditional music class, his ears perked up at the sound of loud and catchy music bouncing around in the halls. He assumed that it was his mates and they decided to add some flavor to their routines.

     Himchan excitedly walked in the room, only to be met with the shocked faces of the two, who were apparently practicing for a school performance. They mentioned something about welcoming the new comers of the school, and Himchan was intrigued because, he wasn’t aware that new enrollees get those special celebration.

     Both were shy and awkward as they introduced themselves, they admit they felt inferior in his presence and Himchan just waved it off with a chuckle, giving the two boys a fist pump to the air that signifies a ‘hwaiting’. Himchan turned to his heel, but the loud and addicting rhythm started to waft to the air. He took a glance backwards and was blown away at the high performance level the two dongsaengs were having, considering it was just a practice. The used to be shy and awkward young men that introduced themselves were dancing like a beast, and Himchan wasn’t exaggerating about that. Hips swayed in unison, intricate footwork were smoothly done to the beat of the music, arms flailed in such a way that would surely make you stop in your tracks. Himchan was star struck, in all honestly. Not once in his life did he encounter dancing as good as that. When the song trailed off, Himchan found himself clapping, forgetting that he still had classes to attend to.

     Himchan stated that he’s already a fan and that he will surely look forward to their performance. He also added that they were amazing dancers and who ever mentored them deserves recognition, and a lot of them.

     The younger of the two shyly walked his way to Himchan and asked if he wanted to watch their group practice as a whole, and he was delighted to accept the invitation, which fired a big smile on both of the boy’s faces. They gave the address of the studio to Himchan in a giddy manner and told him that if ever he wasn’t allowed to enter, he should just say that, Jepp, their mentor, has invited him to stay for the afternoon practice.

     He ruffled the hair of the boys and blazed through the hallway, trying to catch up to his next class.

     Himchan stared at the wall clock that was ticking way to slow for his own liking. It was already the last period and yet here he is, waiting for a damn eight minutes to pass. A pink note suddenly appeared on his desk and he motioned his head to where it came from, it was from Jieun.

Hey! Can you join me after school? ><;

I need to go somewhere!!

     He quickly scribbled a reply, declining the request since he has to go visit his dongsaengs at Mato Dance Studios. He expected a cold response from the lady when the note was returned to him. Knowing Jieun, rejection is something that you should never consider when it comes to dealing with this lady, but for some reason, Himchan always manages to get away with it. A new pink paper was thrown to his desk and it was haphazardly folded and he parted it quickly.

EH?! I’m going there too~

Must be fate? Kidding!!

     As he was about to reply, the bell rang.

     Himchan instantaneously packed all of his belonging in his backpack and waited outside the classroom for Jieun. When the latter was ready, they started to walk side by side to the outside of the school, on their way to the designated place they both ought to go. It was a silent walk in the beginning, but Jieun wasn’t a woman of silence, so Himchan half-expected a start of conversation from the girl, and he was right.

     “Why’re you goin’ to the studio? Perhaps you’re a hidden dancer?” Jieun teased poking him at his sides, causing him to flinch slightly at the touch.

     “No! I look like a fish out of water if I try to dance.” Himchan joked and started to execute sloppy dance moves whilst pulling faces that were honestly embarrassing to watch, yet Jieun just found herself leisurely laughing at the man beside him, playfully slapping him as an attempt to make him stop. “I’m actually going to watch some dongsaengs practice.” He chimed in, Jieun’s snickers still heard slightly in the background. He returned the question and Jieun just copied his answer.

     On the way to the studio, they just started to talk about spontaneous things like, fashion, dramas, the latest movies, an idol whom they find attractive, food, and so on until the finally step foot on the first step of the stairs. Himchan was excited to see how the practice will go, since it’ll be a crew practice which translates to: It’s going to be ten times more awesome that what he saw earlier this day.

     He follows Jieun’s lead, since it seems like she does the visiting a lot. They both walk in the dance studio. Himchan’s eyes glinted at the surroundings. One wall entirely painted with splashes of graffiti and the centerpiece seems to be a bunny with a red mask on it. Another wall were just a mirrors that stretched from ceiling to the floor. They sit on a far corner, watching about four people do their stretching. He was familiar with two faces, although the other two girls didn’t really ring a bell on his mind.

     “The girl with the shorter hair is Hyosung, and the other one is Sunhwa. Just in case you were wondering.” Jieun winked as if she had just read Himchan’s mind. The two boys noticed Himchan from the mirror and they both did a quick wave before commencing on the stretches once more.

     Himchan was in awe with how the Hyosung girl was moving. She was very attractive and had a really good figure. His eyes subtly stalk her every move, which he later thought was creepy, so he just looked away and focused on the ground.

     “Yah! When’s the practice starting? I’m getting sleepy watching you guys stretch.” Jieun said loudly for everyone to hear, and they all crack a smile then later burst out laughing, and Himchan was laughing along too.

     “When Jepp-hyung arrives, we’ll practice.” Jongup answered with a small voice that Himchan thought was so squishy cute.

     “Trust me, just call him Yongguk-hyung. I don’t get why he has to call himself ‘Jepp’ really.” Jieun said with giggles, Hyosung and Sunhwa seconding her statement.

     “You’re just jealous you’re only called Jieun~” Yongguk emerged from the door, with a gym bag firmly placed on his shoulder, his other hand occupied with a bottle of water. He walked over to Jieun and gave her hair a short toss, but stared for a little longer when his eyes caught the sight of Himchan.

     “Hey..” Yongguk awkwardly voiced out, as he placed his bag near Jieun’s side. “What brings you here?” Yongguk asked harmlessly.

     “Jepp-hyung! We invited him! He looked so amazed and said that the mentor deserves a lot of credit so.. we thought that he should meet you.” Junhong said in a pace that was way to fast to barely understand. Himchan just nodded and gave Yongguk a bunny smile and a light punch to the abdomen [which was very impressively solid.].

     “You heard ‘em, Jepp.” Himchan said cheekily.  Like a key turning in a lock, his mind processed that Jepp and Yongguk were just one person, that must mean that he’s the one choreographed all those difficult moves that he saw. His astonishment wasn’t completely set to high until he saw the routine that the crew has been trying to wrap up in time for the performance.

     The routine was very hard-hitting. All of them moved almost too unrealistic, synchronization was always achieved, the movements were all fluid, although some mistakes were committed, it was barely noticeable. Himchan observed them one by one, and he was thoroughly impressed by Zelo’s way of conveying the steps, likewise with Jongup who seemed to have a 180^o turn from his usual demeanor. Hyosung was undeniably flawless to watch and Sunhwa gave a calming effect despite the feel of the dance. But when his eyes landed on Yongguk, well, it seemed like it was stuck there. His glance turned to a stare which evolved to a gaze;a gaze full of amazement that one would have if ever they meet their favorite idol. Himchan’s mouth slowly hung open without him realizing. All that was running in his train of thoughts was how Yongguk looked enticing, leading all of the members with such enthusiasm.

     Or how Yongguk’s focus seem to draw Himchan to the edge of his seat.

     Or the peculiar thought that sweat never looked this attractive on someone.

     Or how Yongguk was just irresistible in general.

     All the corners and the crevices of his mind seemed to only accept data that had Yongguk’s name imprinted on all of it.

     Once the routine was done, the four went to their respective belongings either to wipe the seat of their bodies, or maybe have a big gulp of water to hydrate them. Since Yongguk’s bag was situated beside Jieun, naturally he’s made his way there.

     But Himchan wasn’t prepared for it yet. His brain was having an overload of too much Yongguk that the mere sight of him made his skin almost catch fire. This has never happened to him before, ever. It’s like as if Yongguk’s presence made him feel a tad bit more conscious about himself or just made him feel flat out unsettled. The moment Yongguk was right in front of them, he just offered him a sheepish smile and Yongguk returned the favor.

     The latter got a hold of his water bottle and started to drink from it, exhaustion caused him to loosed his grip thus equating to some droplets of water to trickle down from the corner of his mouth, making it’s way down his neck and quickly disappearing once it reached the inside of Yongguk’s shirt.

     Himchan has never been this observant before.

     Yongguk wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and gave Himchan a gummy smile and stuck his tongue out for Jieun.

     Himchan doesn’t know why the pounding of his heart started to quicken or why his stomach was turning in an unimaginable way. He turned to look at Jieun, who had a knowing smile plastered of her face.

     Yongguk gave his crew a ten minute break, which was a very rare case. It wasn’t like he felt all of a sudden generous, but a feeling of being dazed made it’s way to Yongguk’s head and he has no idea or recollection of how it managed to settle in his head. He just stood by the corner opposite of where Himchan and Jieun were seated. Standing there, he noticed how Jieun’s eyes lit up when Himchan turned to her right after he stride his way to this very far corner.

     His eyes didn’t fail to see the gesture of whisper that Jieun offered Himchan, to which Himchan reacted in a quite defensive manner. The latter looked at her with disbelief and whispered something back, and he saw, for sure how Jieun’s smirk was directed at him when the boy was trying to air our something in secret.

     Yongguk started to feel conscious. He wasn’t really the vain type, but he can’t help but think that the subject of the hushed conversation was him. But then again he could be wrong. He heard Jieun’s laugh float in the atmosphere and he couldn’t help but feel jealous because of how close they are all of a sudden.

     He was the one who’s supposed to be close with the other, right?

     After all, it was he who found Himchan.

     Yongguk thought it was unfair that Jieun was getting credit for his efforts of getting Himchan to be in their group. He thought that if anyone was going to be Himchan’s bestfriend, then it should’ve been him. The person in his thoughts took a quick glance, which he caught, and then started to whisper yet again something to Jieun.

     Yongguk pushed the jealousy on the back of his mind as he asked his crew to assemble to their places. With that at the back of his mind, he made sure that Himchan had a spot running on the front of it.

     The practice lasted for about two more hours, and Himchan felt tired. It didn’t help that the skies decided to cry the moment that the practice was over. He abruptly stood up as everyone was bidding their goodbye’s, Himchan decided to exchange with them as a form of courtesy. Suddenly, Himchan’s thoughts were awakened when he heard thunder. It looks like it was going to be a long night full of rain. Good thing he brought an umbrella for good measure, otherwise he’s going to have to go home soaked and whenever that happened the only next step was for him to be sick. The dance studio was quickly emptied, except for the presence of Jieun, Yongguk and himself.

     “Himchan!” Jieun exclaimed quietly as Yongguk was starting to turn off the lights of the studio.

     “Hmm?” Himchan responded with a sound, curious of what may be running through his friend’s head.

     “Give me your umbrella.” She commanded, and Himchan was quick to act. She immediately hides it in her back pack before the last light of the dance studio was put out. From the door, Yongguk emerged and he stretched slightly with a yawn as he lazily walked to Himchan and Jieun’s direction.

     “W-what?!” Jieun said in a surprised manner that startled both of the guys in the room. “Well, Himchan, that’s too bad.” Jieun continued to have her monologue leaving Himchan confused.

     “What do—“ Himchan sealed his lips shut when Jieun’s eyes grew wide as if saying “Don’t say a word, let me handle this.”

     “Gukkie! Himchan doesn’t have an umbrella. Do you mind sharing yours with him?” Jieun acted worried, turning to Yongguk while in her lower lip.

     “Yeah, sure.” Yongguk agreed, gesturing Himchan to walk with him on the way to go down the stairs.

     Jieun gave him a wink and sprinted her way pass the two. Oh. Himchan thought. Is this why she’s a self- proclaimed match-maker? Himchan realized she was giving him way to Yongguk. Well, it’s not like he admitted he has a crush on Yongguk, but Jieun insisted that she’s always five steps ahead when it came to reading people’s feelings, to which Himchan just nodded to in order for arguments no to arise. He thanked her mentally as he briskly walked to Yongguk’s side.

     Himchan seemed to tense at the slight graze as they were walking on the wet streets of the town. It was silent at first, he didn’t want it to be that way. His fascination with Yongguk grew more when he visited the dance studio. It was as if he was able to unravel a new mystery from Yongguk, and it gave him a warm tingle in his heart, to know something that he didn’t before. He wanted to strike a conversation with the older, but he just didn’t know where to start.

     “Hey, do—“ Both of them said in chorus, which resulted to a hearty laughter.

     “You first.” Himchan insited and Yongguk claimed the opportunity.

     “Well, how’s school so far?” Himchan thought that it would be generic for anyone to ask him that. “Well, it’s enjoyable. Considering I have a lot of good friends,” Himchan said carefully, as he glanced at Yongguk and quickly averting his gaze to the wet surface under his feet. “You and Jieun seem to be to peas in a pod!” Yongguk interjected out of nowhere, and Himchan just giggle in an awkward manner, unsure of what to say next.

     “Well, she’s a really great girl.” Himchan played safe, but his estimations were wrong, because it seemed like he was harboring feelings for the young lady.

     “Oh. So, you like her?” Yongguk grinned at him and Himchan started to be defensive. “N-no! Of course not! I mean, I do like her, but not like-like her. You know what I’m saying?” Himchan gave him a curious look and Yongguk just laughed it out again. “If you say so~” Yongguk said with a teasing voice.

     “I’m serious! I mean, how about you? You guys are too close to be considered as ‘just friends.’ If there’s anyone who likes her, it’s probably you.” Himchan was quick to think of something to come back at the older. “Nah.” Was all that Yongguk replied with a faint smile.

     “You..you’re really great at dancing.” Himchan confessed. He wanted to slap himself for sounding so lame and awkward. He just wished to become one with a puddle of rain to save him from the embarrassment he’s causing himself.

     “It’s really not yet polished, the routine, I mean—“

     “Pfft! The way you move was extraordinary, Yongguk! Are you sure you’re not a robot? I mean, your footwork and your arm movements were too good to be true! The way your face is immersed in the song is just..” Himchan trails off because he realized he might sound repulsive for spazzing out his feelings toward Yongguk’s dancing. “I’m a fan.” Himchan decides to leave it at that before his mouth says something he regrets.

     It takes those sincere words to other people that would make them motivated and happy with what they do. A simple gesture of a clap or big words of affirmation can go a long way for someone. It’s as if those are boosters that help them strive harder and make them want to achieve better. Yongguk felt as if he had found a certain someone who can supply him with all of the motivation he needs.

     They don’t dwell on a certain topic, but they let the flow of their minds go and they flee from conversation to conversation. It’s time like this wherein we discover new things not only about the other party but also in themselves as well. Those little conversations helped them learn and understand each other in a way that no one would probably be able to. Himchan felt comfort surge within him as he talks to Yongguk on the way to his apartment.

     The drumming of the rain against the umbrella felt almost homey. Himchan would make it a point to slightly always ‘accidentally’ brush the back of his hands with Yongguk just to get the feel of it. Once Himchan was in front of his apartment complex, he just gave Yongguk a warm bunny smile, and to his surprise, the other man pulled him into a hug.

     It felt warm.

     It felt fluttery.

    It was the type of fuzziness that you want to bury yourself in, and have no intention of letting go. The gesture was as if Himchan was leaning onto Yongguk for support, but what he doesn't know is that it's Yongguk clinging onto him with the much needed warmth, because that's what friends are for. They pick ech other up when they're down, they encourage them and give the assurance that they got each other's back. 

     Himchan almost pouts when Yongguk finally frees him from his hold, but was surprised when Yongguk turned his attention to his hand. The younger could feel his palm against the other, and he can't help but stop all of the exploding feelings that were erupting all at the same time. He supressed it into a seemingly friendly smile.

     "Good Night, Channie..See you tomorrow." Yongguk said airily.

     Yongguk lets go of his hand and starts walking away. Himchan just stands there, unmoving, the flow of blood somehow rushing at his face. He was thankful taht Yongguk hadn't witnessed his vulnerable state. When Yongguk was already but a small shadow on the street, Himchan barely whispered.

     "ing Yongguk. Being attractive."

     And there was no denying that at that very moment, Himchan have just developed a crush on Bang Yongguk.

✧✧✧✧✧

     The cool breeze had shook him awake from the memory of how his heart ignited a tiny spark that caused a raging flame, which he never expected. That memory will always be his favorite because it deals with the first experiences of something that everyone wants to get a hold of and experience.

     And that was first love.

     He remembers the first time he really looked at that certain man in a way that made his heart do flips. He remembers being overly concerned with how he looked especially when that man was around. He remembered being so helplessly in love, with a mindset that the man will never ever return his feelings.

     As he was reminiscing, the scent of coffee wafted to the air, and just a few feet away from his was a café that he frequented when he was in high school. His foot immediately found it’s way in. He walked up to the counter, ordered an Americano, and settled in an empty seat. The lack of control was unfamiliar to him, since memories just seem to reel out in a marathon, like it was an old show that decided to be aired again. Himchan didn’t mind, oh, not at all.

     As he sat comfortably in the café, another set of memories flood and he found himself shaking his head at the remembrance of an embarrasing scene as he took every sip of his coffee.

     It was that very moment he decided that even if Bang Yongguk was going to be a part of his past, then he would want him to be included in his future.

     But there are just some things that we can't stop. Inasmuch as Himchan wanted to think that everything happens for a reason, he can't help but wonder why some events decide to happen. Was that a sign that destiny and fate does, in fact exist? Is it a way of saying that we cannot determine who we're going to be with in the future? 

      If everyone deserved to be happy, why did Himchan feel so alone in the present? 

      He took another cautious sip from his coffee.

     "It's because you're not here to share it with me." Himchan laughed dryly, whispering the bittersweet words that have haunted him ever since.

Author's Thoughts:

potek. ;AA; i think there will still be about approximately 3 chapters more. 

I hope you like this update! ^^ 

Ooh~ Himchan is lonely? How come? What could've happened? Please look forward to it on the next chapter!

ALSO! If you follow on my other stories, I'll be happy to announce that Transient & Stuck on You will

FINALLY be updated tomorrow [Or later today? In my case~]~ Sorry for the delay! ^^

AND LECHE WHOEVER IS AN EXO STAN PLS PLS PLS HOLLA AT ME.

We can spazz together, YANAMSAYIN'?

lol ps; unbeta-ed bollshet idk anymore.

pps; sorry if this is a long 10+ pages chapter  jumbled into one puddle of wolf shyt.

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<3