im gonna cry bc ayyyy guys last chapter!! it's 2k long and im so sorry if this disappoints ;;;;;

ps bc did u guys realize we passed the 1 year mark a few months back i didn't even wow i this fic is over a year old wtf

“You never told me why you liked me.”

                Sungyeol laughed, sitting up straight from his slouching position on the couch. They’d moved themselves to the family room, a television show playing aimlessly in the corner. “What do you mean? Of course I told you.”

                “Not like…” Myungsoo groaned, trying to find the right words to say. “You told me it was because I fit your ideal type more. But that’s bull, I call complete and total bull on that.”

                “And here I was, thinking that you didn’t have it in you to cuss,” Sungyeol smirked, pushing his body back down so that he looked like he was once about to fall off, although he was comfortable.

                “Sungyeol.”

                “It’s simple, really,” Sungyeol shrugged, looking away from his boyfriend and at the commercial playing on the TV. “When we met, that’s probably pretty much where everything began.”

                “What does that have to do anything?”

                “What doesn’t it?”

                “Sungyeol, I’m being serious right now –“     

                “And I am too,” the older replied simply. “It’s not hard to comprehend, Myungsoo. When I met you, you were literally the cutest thing in the world. Like, like a cupcake, except those really cute ones that hipster bakeries make and you just can’t bring yourself to eat it. And it’s not just that, you were kind, you were considerate, and you cared about making a first impression to someone that would probably mean nothing in your entire high school future.          

                “Your brother, on the other hand, was a class A . He jacked my seat, he fell asleep, and when I asked him to get out, he was a about it. And I hate that, I hate that so much – what some people don’t realize is that putting yourself before anyone else doesn’t get you anywhere. And yeah, don’t interrupt me Myungsoo, I get it, your brother’s a good guy. L’s great, and I’m glad I got to know him, the real him and not the total dickwad him. But that doesn’t make a difference, because what if I never got to know you guys? What if I stayed the same stranger I always was? You would’ve at least had the effort to wave to me in the hallways once in a while, remembering me as that one kid that helped you on your first day. L, he just…if I wasn’t his type, or good looking, or whatever, he would’ve never taken the chance to get to know me.”

                Myungsoo was silent at this, staring down at his empty hands. He’d given the remote control to Sungyeol a few minutes beforehand when the older wanted to switch channels, and he’d handed it over no questions asked.

                “What some people don’t realize is that putting yourself before anyone else doesn’t get you anywhere.”

                “Look, Myungsoo, I was conflicted for the longest time. I was, I really was. But it’s not a hard decision once you stand back and look at the whole picture.” Sungyeol coughed, placing the remote on the table and then alternating his body to make himself sit up straight facing the other. Myungsoo’s eyes kept trailing on the remote, thinking about what his boyfriend had said. “I don’t go by pity, that’s not what I do. And it’s stupid of me, shallow, really, to think that I could stand between two brothers. But I did it anyways, and in the end I chose someone. L’s such an amazing person, he really is, he’s convoluted as hell but he’s got the biggest heart.”

                “Then what am I?” Myungsoo asked carefully, his words steady and his voice low. He looked up at Sungyeol, eyes nearly twitching. The older was slightly taken aback, obviously having had intentions of continuing his explanation and not expecting Myungsoo to interrupt.

                “You’re Kim Myungsoo,” Sungyeol shrugged after a good minute of thinking. There was a soft smile on his face that Myungsoo couldn’t seem to describe, but it was the type of smile that just brought the world to their knees. “You laugh at everything everyone says to make them feel better, you bake cookies for your younger brother, and you try to make the stupidest dreams make sense to the stupidest person. You might think you’re the most simplistic, most boring person alive, but you’re not. You have flaws, you have issues – God, you have a lot of issues – but you’re Kim Myungsoo, and that’s what I fell in love with.”

                “Okay, first of all,” the younger pointed at his boyfriend, “my issues, that you’re aware of, are minimal, and second –“ the blush was staring to appear on his cheeks again, the same blush he remembered creeping up his neck when he saw Sungyeol standing outside the school for the first time, chest heaving with fast-paced breaths and eyes gleaming and lips forming the most hypnotic laugh, “ – who said anything about love?”

                “I literally just did,” Sungyeol said with narrowed eyes. Nonetheless, he reached over to grab the remote again, handing it to Myungsoo. “Here, you choose the channel now.”

“I really like taking pictures.”

                Yoojong held the bag close to her, gleeful at the thought of the empty Tupperware inside. “I know.”

                “No, like I really like taking pictures.” L stopped at the stoplight, putting his hands into his pockets and sighing. It’d already been eight minutes since they left the shop and he didn’t even want to think about returning home.

                “You’re giving yourself away,” Yoojong chimed, leaning against the stoplight.

                “What?” He looked down at her and couldn’t help but be confused. His only motive in this conversation was to prolong the walk home, and he figured if he kept talking about his love for photography, she would ask him about it, and photography was the only thing L could keep ranting on about without getting tired and running out of things to supply the topic with.

                Yoojong looked down at the bag, staring hard at the crumbs decorating the clear box. She swallowed a deep mixture of her saliva and her distraught feelings, then looked up.

                “I want you to walk over to the other side of the crosswalk, and then wait there for me to come over.”

                “What’s the –“

                “Myungsoo, do it.”

                L, hesitant for a second, stared at the white walking figure and began making his way over. He could feel cars judging him, but when were they not? It was halfway before he glanced over his shoulder again to see if Yoojong was following him.

                She was still standing on the other side, side against the stoplight and face looking straight at him.

                When he made it to the other side, he waited as Yoojong commenced to stand up straight and press the button, waiting for the same figure L had seen before walking over.

                He took the time to look around himself, see the place for once; the weather wasn’t even bright, it was gloomy and it reminded him of –

                Yoojong’s pants.

                “You’re wearing gray sweatpants,” L observed, looking up at the girl’s face.

                “Thanks for noticing, I wanted to wear something more appropriate but I didn’t have time between the brownie-making and researching.”

                “…Researching?” L knew she wasn’t one to bring up nonsense activities like ‘researching’ out of nowhere unless –

                “Myungsoo hates photography.”

                “What?”

                Yoojong raised an eyebrow, shrugging and starting to walk away. L was following at her heels, waiting for an explanation.

                “Let’s do this again.” She turned around halfway through the sidewalk, a smile plastered on her face. L recognized it as the same one he’d grown to know, genuine or not, he was to figure that out. “My name is Choi Yoojong. I like baking and playing soccer. What’s your name?”

                L was frozen for a second, not being able to think of a proper sentence that wouldn’t make him sound like a loser, which he inevitably seemed like at this moment.

                “Well, I’ll tell you who you’re not,” Yoojong said, the smile on her face faltering to a quite distinguished fake one. “You’re not Kim Myungsoo. You wanna know why? Because Kim Myungsoo doesn’t like photography. He doesn’t like sweet foods, and he doesn’t talk to strangers without going through half an anxiety attack first.” She peered down at L’s neck as if imagining a camera strapped down his chest, and continued. “He hates photography because he’s had bad experiences with it. He said that if there was a single regret in his life, it would be that photography wouldn’t exist as a hobby because somehow, just somehow, the prospect of picture-taking almost guilt-tripped him to hell.

                “Second,” she began saying as she took a step forward, “he would never eat a brownie. Why? Because he doesn’t like the taste of anything sweet. And it’s not because he likes bitter food, it’s simply because too sweet things seem to always have a more negative effect than neutral things.”

                Before she could continue her long lecture, L rolled his eyes and took a few steps back. “. You know what, Yoojong, you. Just literally, you. If you did so much ing research on my older brother, then you could’ve spared me the details. You don’t need to go on and start ranting and making me feel like the most worthless brother in the world –“

                “I’m trying to tell you something right now,” Yoojong glared, stressing every syllable of the phrase as best as she could. “You don’t need to have the indecency to interrupt me –“

                “Shut up. Just shut up.” L couldn’t do this, he literally escaped the house to get away from the mess that was Lee Sungyeol and his brother. He didn’t need the reminder that he was what was standing between Myungsoo accepting the fact that Sungyeol wasn’t L’s and that he was probably the entire reason why Myungsoo could never have what he really, truly wanted.

                The boy couldn’t even ing like photography because one time when they were immature kids, he ratted out his little brother for taking photos. And for some stupid reason, no matter the reason why he hated sweets, he still relentlessly baked chocolate chip cookies for his twin brother.

                And the hugest you, L of all was the third point that Yoojong pointed out; Myungsoo would have never done this. He would’ve never talked to a stranger in the bathroom, force his way into her life as means to reaching her photographer father, and he most definitely wouldn’t have used his identity to do so.

                “I don’t care,” Yoojong shrugged. “I honestly don’t care because thinking that I knew who you were just gave me assurance to meeting you. You didn’t need to pretend to be your brother – I presume at least – you just needed to tell me that you were a decent human being, at least decent enough to hold a conversation with.”

                L couldn’t seem to find anything to do but shrug his shoulders. He couldn’t admittedly say that he’d been in this situation before because really, who has been? But he knew enough than to go against what Yoojong had said. “I’m not mad at you.”

                “Well that’s a relief,” Yoojong broke out in a heavy sigh, holding her chest. “But honestly, I know you’re not. You’re just mad at yourself – why will always be a mystery to me, but at least you know.”

                “…at least you know.”

                L felt himself choke at the back of his throat, shot Yoojong one last look, and began to cross the street for a run home.

When L had reached the place he’d been in such a rush to leave, he felt a wave of anxious take over his mind. He’d been relieved at first when he was at the crosswalk talking to Yoojong because then he thought that he’d had everything planned out, but now seeing that he was here…he didn’t have a ing clue as of what to do.

                The door he’d thrown open was now closed, and as he walked in he could hear the television playing. Sungyeol was in front of the couch, legs bent beneath him as he played around with nothing. Myungsoo was right there beside him, only the younger had fallen asleep and slumped off on the other side of the couch.

                “You’re back,” Sungyeol looked up, a shadow of a smile playing on his lips. “Where’d you go?”

                “Talked to a friend,” L managed to say without sounding like he had a lifetime of regrets piled up against the other.

                And he didn’t, that was what the great reveal was that he wanted to tell his older brother – I don’t hate you or Sungyeol, I really don’t, I never did and I never will and I can be an absolute sometimes but I’ll always love you no matter what.

                “Myungsoo wanted to stay awake until you got home but he looked like he was about to crash in eight seconds so I told him to rest,” Sungyeol said when he saw L’s eyes look directly at Myungsoo.

                “He’s a deep sleeper.”

                “I know,” Sungyeol grinned. “Hey, look L –“

                “I’m okay, it’s not a big deal.” L gave the other a hesitant, although quite genuine, smile to ensure the fact that he really was okay. He’d most definitely been through much worse things than this.

                “Then you don’t mind if I stay?”

                “Actually, not at all,” L decided after a good minute of thinking. “I might need you to chill Myungsoo down after he wakes up and hears that I’ve already moved on to someone else. He thinks it’s not healthy to fall for people too quickly.”

                “I got your back,” Sungyeol laughed, mock-saluting the other. And as L walked away to his room, he realized something: the unquestioning smile on Sungyeol’s face told him, two things that he already seemed to know but never hurt to be reminded  of; the older was one hell of a great friend and probably not someone he’d ever want to be in a real romantic relationship with.

                “He didn’t even bother asking who it was,” L muttered to himself, climbing onto Myungsoo’s desk and turning on his computer. Before he could even think of being hurt, though, he shrugged and figured that even the person he had in mind didn’t know about his feelings.

                Then, he commenced to Google how to bake chocolate chip cookies.

oh go d to think i actually did that i finished this idek what to think

sooyeol ending i think yalls figured that out though lmao im so sorry you get this crappy ending update like three months later

i want to say i tried really hard to make this good but honestly most of this was written at like 2am eating cereal i wish i was kidding

a lot of u guys didn't seem to like yoojong and i can understand why, but tbh guys she was never meant to be a love interest but honestly i went cray with the ending of this chapter so yalls can interpret it the way you want HAHA

and i'm well aware yoojong may seem all obsessed and creepy with the facts but i promise she's not supposed to be, she was there to kinda show L the way around and kinda tell him if i could ing figure these things out about your twin brother then so can you but yh

anyways i get that this can be confusing SO AAAYYYY ANY QUESTIONS JUST THROW THEM UP AT ME I WILL ANSWER TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITIES we had such a good run with this fic and i feel pretty decent with the way it turned out and just guysugyugugusy thank you so much for sticking with me through this and i would do my usual chapter long a/n after this but since this is a short fic i won't. i just want you to know that i'm so sosososoos o damn grateful for everything you guys have done for this fic and thx for being w me when i wanted to rant about it and yeah. thx for living with me and the entire au of myungsoo and L and sungyeol. you guys are great and ilysm

anyways though if you want im honestly //always// open to talk to like if you send me a message there is probably a 100% chance i will reply

THANKS FOR THIS YEAR OF GREATNESS I'M SORRY IM LAZY ILYSM yes yes this is evie sayin' bye for now ♥

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