It had been days since I went outside with Zico. Don't ask how many, because I wasn't actually paying attention enough to count. All I knew was that the sunlight hurt my eyes, so I would close the blinds, but at night, when the stars were out, I would open the curtains and stare at the sky, wondering if Onew could see them too. If we were seeing the same stars.

And then when the sun started to rise I would close the curtains again, lay down under the covers, and sleep away the pain.  I had locked the door, and every morning Zico would knock and ask me to come out and play with him. Ask me to have breakfast with him. He would stand there, waiting for an answer, and when I didn't answer, he would sigh anf walk away. I would listen to his footsteps getting quieter and quieter, and then I would sleep again, ignoring everything. I ignored the fact that I was thirsty, and needed water so badly. I didn't know if the water was safe from the bathroom sink, so I didn't even try. And I was hungry. Really hungry. The last thing I had eaten was that orange and I knew that was days ago.

And I needed a shower. So badly. But I ignored it. It didn't matter anyway. Zico wasn't going to let me go back to Onew, ever, so I would just rather die. This was the most depressed I had ever felt in my entire life. And I just wanted to die.

My stomach growled, and I my lips, thirsty. I felt like I was going to pass out. I was so tired, even though all I did was sleep. I closed my eyes and started drifting, in and out of sleep, when Zico came bursting into the room, key in his hand.

"Get out." I whispered, covering myself with the bed sheets. He flipped them back, so I hid my face in the pillow. "Go away."  I said louder.

"No. You're going to die if you stay in here like this. You need to eat and you need to drink something. You're dehydrated."

"No."

"Meeghan, come on! Do you want to die?"

"Yes."

He was silent, then he grabbed me, picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, and carried me out of the room and into the kitchen. My hair was a mess, and I probably smelled terrible. I tried to struggle.

"Zico, let me down." I really had no strength. I couldn't fight against him, I was too exhausted. My stomach hurt and I felt kind of sick.

"Once I get some food into you, I will let you go." He walked to the fridge and tried to grab something, but I was in the way. He sat me in a chair and started rummaging through the fridge. I stood up and started to wobble back to my room, but he grabbed me and sat me down.

"Just sit down."

"No." I got back up and started walking. Whatever he was making smelled good, but it was makign my stomach queasy. I was going to barf. He grabbed me and sat me back down, again.

"SIT DOWN." He yelled. I covered my mouth, trying to hold back my puke. He must have thought I was upset or something and that was why I was covering my mouth, so he sighed and smiled slightly. "Sorry." He said, moving my dirty hair behind my ear.

And then I barfed all over his floor. I moaned and fell on my knees, puking again. He looked surprised for a minute before he started running around, finding something to clean it up. The puke stung my throat, since all it was was stomach acid. He came back with a mop and a bucket and helped me to the bathroom in the hallway. He handed me a toothbrush and toothpaste. He wet a towel and started gently wiping it off from around my mouth. I struggled to get the cap off the toothpaste, my hands shaking. He saw and took it from me, squirted some on the toothbrush, and helped me brush my teeth. Then he picked me up and carried me to the living room couch.

"I'll make you some oatmeal or something. Is that okay?" He asked, smoothing back my hair. I nodded slightly. I still felt a little queasy. A few minutes later he came back with a bowl of steaming oatmeal and a spoon. He tried to feed it to me, but I refused. I took a few bites and sighed contentedly. It was really good. When I was done, he made me a cup of tea and turned the TV on for me, putting in a movie.

I fell asleep watching Harry Potter.

I woke up and it was dark. The living room was barely lit by a small lamp in the corner. I sat up, looking around. I couldn't really see anything. I stood up and stretched, my stomach growling, and then suddenly, I had to puke again. I covered my mouth and ran for the bathroom, stubbing my toe on the way. I flipped the switch when I walked in and let everything out into the toilet. After I puked a few times, I heard footsteps, and Zico came running into the bathroom. I had gotten barf in my hair and I felt disgusting.

"You must be sick." He said, sounding worried.

"I don't really feel sick. I just feel like puking."

He chewed on his bottom lip and sighed.

"I want to take a shower." I said. "My hair is gross."

"Do you want help? I could wash your hair for you. I don't want you to pass out or anything."

"No I'm fine. I'll be able to stand. I'm kind of hungry though."

He nodded and helped me up and into my bathroom, and walked out, mumbling something about soup.

I showered quickly and put on some cute pajamas. The pajama shirt had a hood with Panda ears, so I flipped it up and walked to the living room, my arms crossed.  I went to the couch and threw myself on to it, while Zico rushed over to me with a bowl of soup.

"Try to eat this. If you barf again, I have some flu medicine. I hope it isn't the flu... but if it is, I think I know what to do. Maybe it's just because you haven't eaten for a few days... yeah that's it." He mumbled the last part to himself, watching me sip the soup cautiously.

I took a few sips of the broth, and again, felt sick. I handed him the bowl, shaking my head fervently, and bolted toward the bathroom. I let everything out into the toilet, for the 3rd time today. 

"Ugh." I moaned, when he followed me, a bottle in his hands.

"This is for the flu... I don't know... Maybe you should take some, just in case. I'm not sure if it's the flu since you don't have any symptoms." He felt my forehead and bit his lip. "You feel kind of warm."

"I'm fine." I took his hand off my head and set it back at his side. "I would like a cup of tea though. I can try to eat something tomorrow."

"Yeah... yeah that's a good idea." He nodded, helping me up, again. He laid me down in bed, tucking me in. "Lay here for a minute, I'll go make some tea." He patted my head and smiled slightly. I turned away from him and curled up on my side. I really missed Onew. My stomach felt disgusting and I wanted him to hold me. I started to cry again, terrible sobs racking my entire body.

"Hey... hey! Are you okay? Are you in pain?!" Zico came running into the room, forgetting about the tea in his hand. It splashed everywhere. He set it on the bedside table and felt my head again. He bit his lip, for the millionth time, and started freaking out. "What am I supposed to do?! UUUUGH, ottokhae.... How can I help you? Do you need medicine?"

I couldn't answer him, I was busy trying to control my breathing. I couldn't. The sobs just kept taking my breath away, leaving me gasping for air.

"Tell me, do you need something?!" He asked frantically. I tried t ofocus on his face, but the tears were blurring my eyes.

"I n-need Onew." His name caused me to cry even harder. Snot was flowing out of my nose. Disgusting.

Zico looked so broken, I didn't know what to do. He sat down next to me and picked me up and set me on his lap, rocking me back and forth. He whispered in my ear, his voice breaking. I thought he was crying too.

"I'm sorry. Really. I am. I didn't know this would happen to you. I'm sorry." 

I just hugged him back, crushing him to myself, needing someone to hold on to.

We fell asleep that way, him holding me closely, smoothing my hair back and singing in my ear.

Awe sadness T-T lolol i seriously almost cried, this was so saddening XD

So, please comment, PLEASE COMMENT Please comment

comment PLEASE

if you are reading this, comment

i luv yoououuuuuu

i got that SUPA LUV UH UH UH UV

*sorry I'm tired* XD