She picked up and was wiping tears. "Were you crying yourself to sleep?" Was this because of me..?
     "I wasn't. Why'd you call?"
     "Can't sleep. I have a lot on my mind." I shrugged. 
     "Would it be wrong if I asked what was on your mind?" Shinhye asked in a small voice.
     "It's not really a what. More like a who." 
     "Who? Seohyun?" She bought up Seohyun so much. I thought it was just because she supported us, but now I realized that when she talks about Seohyun her feelings are so much more. It isnt support, it's hurt.
     "No. You."
     "Why me? Shouldn't your girlfriend always be on your mind?" She forced out a laugh.
     "Why didn't you tell me?" I finally said.
     "Tell you what?" She said cluelessly.
     "That you liked me. That you felt invisible around me when you and I were wih Seohyun. That you felt like you didn't exist when I'm with you because I'm always talking about Seohyun. Why didn't you talk to me about that?"
     "I'm guessing Hongki told you that? Look, it's getting late. I have a flight tomorrow and I should sleep."
     "Don't avoid my question. Tell me why you felt like that?"
     "Because I know that if I confessed to you, you wouldn't feel the same. I'm invisible because I don't want to get in the way of your life. I don't exist because you have someone else's love, and I supported it. I'm living an unrequited love, that's it. That's how it works, don't worry about it. 4 years from now, when I come back, you'll probably be married to Seohyun, probably have kids, with no memory of me whatsoever. I'll have a fiancee, boyfriend, husband, whatever. Don't worry about me. I'm fine." She says she's fine but she's not.
     "Were you crying because I can't send you off tomorrow?" 
     "I'm crying because you choose not to send me off tomorrow. I'm crying because you put your girlfriend before your best friend. I'm crying because tomorrow is your last oppourtunity to see me for the next four years, but you're spending it with your girlfriend who you see everyday. I'm crying because I'm completely worthless to you. That's why I'm crying. I'm going to sleep. Night." Shinhye hung up immediately. 

i'm crying because i'm worthless to you.

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