Hello guys, I know it's been such a freaking long time since I last updated this story... I am truly sorry but when I first started writing Heartquake, I didn't know it was going to be so difficult -.- I'm not used to writing angsty and complicated plot, so I'm having a major hard time right now.

I promise I'm not abandoning this story at all, I just need more time than for my other stories to finish a chapter.

I'm so sorry I'm so sorry I'm so sorry

Please bear with me ~

It was as if time had stop around them. The tension surrounding the room was oppressing, almost palpable. Nobody dared talking, moving or even breathing.

Hyukjae stared at Donghae with wide, terrified eyes. He wanted to scream out and yell at the latter, although he didn't know why and what he would say. Unexpectedly, he could feel anger boiling in his veins, making him clench his jaw and his fists so tightly it hurt. He suddenly found himself glaring at the barman, while the latter was staring straight in front of him, avoiding any eye contact while sitting stiffly on his chair, as if he regretted what he had just confessed. This made Hyukjae even more furious, all his muscles of his body tensing. He was perfectly aware that his reaction wasn't normal in the slightest, that he should have been terrified instead, but he couldn't help it. Something in Donghae's current behavior made him want to punch him hard, and he had the frustrating, infuriating feeling that this whole situation didn't make any sense at all. He couldn't understand why he still didn't feel afraid of him, why he didn't want to run away from him. If Donghae had really murdered somebody before, then it made him someone really dangerous. But even when Hyukjae tried to force himself feeling something, anything, that might be assimilated to something like fright - even if it was only a little -, he found none. Again, Hyukjae's anger deepened, his glare becoming more and more menacing.

Donghae could feel the other's heavy, accusing stare on him. But he didn't have the heart to confront him just yet. His head, his body, his heart... ; everything hurt so much at this precise moment. Blood was thumping in his ears as his chest tightened hurtfully. It was the first time he had ever said it out loud - the reason why people had sent him into jail. Why he had lost so many years of his life in a stinky, dirty cell with another violent convict. Only Sungmin knew about it, and it was only because he had been there the day Donghae was arrested. Even back in prison, when the other prisoners would ask him why he was there, he would always freeze in place, no words able to come out of his mouth anymore. He had just admitted it out loud, and it was truly painful. His eyes were fixed on the wall in front of him but he barely saw it, staying still as he held back painful tears. He truthfully wanted to cry out, to let all his sorrow and pain out. But he knew that if he allowed himself to do so, then he would probably break down and give up on everything. The present, the future, his hopes, his life. If he still didn't have Yoona and Sungmin in his heart and by his sides, he probably would have killed himself since long ago. The idea in itself scared the out of him, but sometimes, when life was too hard, death seemed to be an easier and more enjoyable path than to live the life of someone accused of murder.

Finally, he dared glancing at Hyukjae, moving slowly on his chair until he faced him.

The look he gave to Hyukjae left him almost breathless. Donghae's eyes showed so strong and pained emotions the young heir could almost feel his sorrow in his own heart. At this precise moment, as they stared at each other wordlessly, almost forgetting about the situation they were currently in, the man seemed too much vulnerable, hurt, lonely. It was the first time Hyukjae could see so much feelings in those dark orbs, usually so mysterious and intense as if it was a cold, invincible barrier to his heart. But now, as they still fixed at each other, the other could almost read his past just by looking in his eyes. His own heart and body ached at the intense pain and sorrow that was surrounding Donghae. His previous wish to yell at him faded to the back of his mind as the urge to comfort him gained him. He wanted to wipe away those small, painful tears appearing at the corners of his eyes, to hug him tight against him. He reached a hand toward, Donghae almost flinching when his hand approached him. Hyukjae was like hypnotized, everything in his head becoming blurry as he could only see Donghae, and nobody else than Donghae. His fingers were getting closer and closer to Donghae's face ; he just had to extend his arm a little more and he would be able to the smooth, flawless skin of his cheek. Just barely...

"Don't touch him!" Mrs. Lee snapped all of a sudden.

Startled, the both of them whipped around to face the woman. The latter was staring at them with wide, terrified eyes as her whole body was trembling with what seemed like anger and fear. Hyukjae briefly thought that it was probably the right way to react in this kind of situation, but his mother spoke again.

"Are you insane, Lee Hyukjae?!" She yelled as she slammed her hand on the table. "Dating a criminal?!"

Next to him, Donghae winced slightly at the accusation. Hyukjae glanced at him quickly, before drifting his attention back on the two persons sitting in front of them. His mother had her face flushed as her fists clenched tightly on the table. Her breathing had became short and rapid, while she threw worried glances toward the barman. She was scared, incredibly scared, and Hyukjae could understand why. But something stopped him from walking around the table and comfort his poor mother. He stayed stuck in his chair, torn between his doubts about Donghae's real past and the rational part of his brain which screamed at him to run away for his life and for his mother's one.

He knew he was crazy for feeling this kind of things for Donghae, but he couldn't help it ; he was concerned for him. He wanted to know more about what had happened, but only to be able to comfort him better. His need to protect the man intensified at a stupefying speed, as his mother kept glaring forcefully at the other. He felt his previous anger gain him again, this time directed toward the woman. He frowned deeply, narrowing his eyes at Mrs. Lee, hating the way she was staring at Donghae from the other side of the table as if he was some sort of a really dangerous disease that could kill the whole world in one tiny second.

"Mother," He called her coldly. "Mother, look at me."

She did, but her eyes were so upset and showed so much disappointment Hyukjae almost flinched, feeling as if he was five again. But he wasn't anymore ; he was grown-up man, and his instinct told him to defend the man he had met only one day ago with all his might. Although this decision might be incredibly foolish and suicidal, he decided to follow it. His eyes turned even more menacing as he stood up from his chair, his eyes never leaving his mother.

Next to him, Donghae followed all his moves with his eyes, feeling slightly worried as to what he had just triggered in this family. He felt sort of guilty that he was the cause of this argument, holding his hands shamefully on his lap as his hesitant eyes remained on the other. He was still so destabilized by his own words, regretting them already. He shouldn't have gone there, he wouldn't have accepted this challenge he had set up himself. He certainly shouldn't have done what he wasn't ready for. His body shaking uncontrollably, he bit his lower lip, until Hyukjae and his mother burst into a loud, violent argument.

"There is no way - do you hear me, no way! - I'll let you date this man!" She yelled while pointing an accusing finger at him. "Stay away from him!"

"You don't know him!" Hyukjae retorted with the same fury, although he realized he didn't, too. "You don't know him, and I do whatever I want, Mother!"

Mrs. Lee stood up abruptly, her chair falling down in the process. Next to her, Siwon flinched, biting on his lower lip with anxiety. She glared at Donghae, meeting his eyes for the first time since he had confessed his past. Her expression showed hatred and disgust, and it hurt so much that he wanted to throw up.

"I won't talk about this anymore," She said with a trembling, icy voice. "This discussion is over. Don't ever see him again, Hyukjae, is it understood?! I'm going home, and you -" She whipped around to glare dangerously at him. "I expect you to be gone in the next ten minutes, and to leave my son alone!"

Without waiting for an answer, she stormed out of the room, closely followed by Hyukjae who tried to talk to her. Only Donghae and Siwon remained there, unmoving and silent.

The former had his vision unfocused, feelings at the edge of bursting into painful and burning tears. He clenched his jaw tightly, before getting up slowly. The other man present in the room snapped his head up upon seeing him move, opening his mouth as if he wanted to speak up. His words getting caught in his throat, he watched the younger stand up. Donghae purposely didn't meet Siwon's eyes, to scared to explode with uncontrollable anger, to release all the pain he had accumulated over the years, on top of the hurtful stab Hyukjae's mother had just gave him. He let out an inaudibly sigh, closing his eyes briefly before walking around the table with shaky steps. His hands were sweaty as his limbs shook violently still, making him almost unable to walk properly to the closed door of the private room. He was literally suffocating there, a horrible claustrophobic sensation eating him up alive at the mere thought of sharing the same room as the older male. Everything seemed to suddenly oppress him painfully, his breathing become ragged and hurtful. He didn't want to think anymore ; his head, his heart - everything was hurting him so badly, the only thing he truly wanted was to go home and cry his sorrow out, even if it meant breaking down from the inside out.

His hand finally reached for the door knob after what felt like an eternity. He grabbed it with a huge relief, seeing his escape getting nearer and nearer. Even if it was only material, he wanted nothing more than just slam the door into Siwon's face once for good. Maybe it would be the right time for him to stop everything, to forget about him and his screwed past life. He only had to focus on his present life with Yoona and Sungmin, to find a decent job and help his younger sister to be an idol or whatever she wished to be in the future. Calming his uneven breathing and trying to soothe the thumping headache in his temples, he opened the door.

"Donghae."

He abruptly stopped in his track, recognizing with mixed feelings the low, deep voice of the man he once loved more than anything. His body tensed as his hold on the door knob painfully tightened. He could feel it ; Siwon's insistent, almost pleading gaze on his back, burning a hole through his aching heart. Should he turn around then, and just forgive him for every sins he had done to him? Should he just throw himself in his arms, trying to find back the warmth he had so long ago procured him? A nostalgic, blurry memory of what their romance looked like insinuated in his weak heart, making him flinch as Siwon repeated his name with the same soft, insistent tone. His eyes fluttered close as a bunch of emotions rushed through him, pain and happiness, love and hatred, all mixed together.

"Donghae." Siwon called again. "Please."

The brunette let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders hurting because of his tension. He opened his eyes again, looking straight in front of him as his sight landed on the still closed door. It's now or never, isn't it? he thought.

Without a word, he opened the door and walked out, not glancing at Siwon even once. He had made his decision, and whatever the other man would want to tell him, nothing will change.

Nothing.

Judging by the cold, horrified glares the employees of the building gave him while he walked out of the company offices, he knew Hyukjae and his mother had been sort of loud when arguing about him. A part of him felt guilty for the young heir, he felt sad he had to argue with his mother only because of him and what he had supposedly did in the past. He gulped down the anxiety still present in his heart while still heading toward the main exit of the lobby. Those few meters felt like interminable kilometers for him as he could feel everybody's stares on him. He felt ashamed and wronged by the whole planet, by every single person who were making assumptions about him and his life only because of rumors they had heard. He felt angered and sad at the same time, the need to turn around and scream at them in frustration itching his senses. But he knew he'd better stay silent and walk out brave, instead of getting even more hurt at the end. When he finally stepped out of the oppressing lobby, he took a long breath, feeling with relief the fresh air penetrating his lungs. The sun was shining brightly, almost blinding him as he walked down the flight of stairs. His car was still where he had parked earlier, waiting for his owner to use it. A small, bitter smile spreading on his lips, he walked around it and got into the driver seat. When he sat down, he closed his eyes tightly and rested his head against the headrest. He felt suddenly exhausted despite the still early hour of the day. He wanted nothing but to drive away as far as possible, possibly never come back. He lazily opened his eyes again, staring out the large windscreen, letting his mind wander and picture exotic landscapes, where nobody would know anything about him and his past. He put the ignition on, ready to drive away when the door of the passenger seat suddenly opened. Startled, he whipped his head around and was shocked to see Hyukjae sitting down on the chair.

Frozen in place, he stared at him at lost of words. The other only frowned at him, urging him to start driving with a demanding glare. Donghae complied, slowly focusing back on the road as he started the engine. He hadn't expected him to come back for him with what had just happened, so nothing came out of his mouth when he tried to speak up. Instead, he stayed silent, nervously driving randomly through the streets of the busy city. Oddly, a part of him hoped that Hyukjae wasn't mad at him. Donghae couldn't explain from where this wish came from, but he truthfully hoped the other brunette would at least try to understand what had happened to him. He knew he wouldn't be able to tell him the whole story because it would ruin his initial plan of hurting Siwon, but the mere thought of knowing he somewhat cared about him at least a little comforted him. The fact he was currently sitting next to him on the passenger seat almost made his heart flutter, his hopes increasing unwillingly - hopes for what, he didn't know.

Nobody could really understand what he had lived through, not even his best friend. It wasn't his fault at all, of course ; he couldn't blame Sungmin for not being able to comprehend something he didn't know - thankfully. He was also aware Hyukjae wouldn't know better, but if he could at least try to understand, Donghae would be glad enough.

Paradoxically, the only thing he didn't want was to get involved in any sort of relationships with him. Would it be rational to get emotionally attached to someone you were fated to hurt? Donghae knew nothing good would come out of the plan he had came up with, which was why he truly felt guilty toward Hyukjae. The latter seemed like a good man, he just happened to be related against his will with someone himself hated more than anything.

"You have some explaining to do," Hyukjae then spoke up softly while staring out the window, breaking the heavy silence surrounding the both of them.

Donghae glanced at him. "I know."

The silence surrounding them when they entered the club together was oppressing and awkward, neither of them daring to say any words to each other. Hyukjae was probably the one feeling the most uncomfortable out of the two, judging by his quick, hesitant glances he shot at the barman. He chewed on his lower lip anxiously, wondering after some thoughts if it had been a good idea to follow his first impulsion which had pushed him to follow the other brunette. Staring at the latter's wide back, he gulped down nervously. Whether it was true or not, Donghae did say he had went to jail, and even if he didn't want to believe it before hearing it himself by his own mouth, he still had to admit it was sort of really intimidating. Although it was quite early, the club was crowded with workers and waiters preparing the room for the restaurant which lasted only during the day, before it turned into a club when the night fell on the city. The young heir didn't dare looking up at the numerous men and women walking past them, staring only at his nervously fidgeting fingers. He didn't know how to sort out this situation at all ; the only reason why he had suddenly decided to burst into Donghae's rusty car and practically order him to drive him around was only because he had been mad and frustrated at his mother.

Indeed, the woman had went ballistic on him as soon as they had stepped out of the small private room where Siwon and Donghae had stayed. He flinched slightly upon remembering his mother's loud, embarrassing shouts throughout the lobby of the company offices, spreading the news that he was supposedly dating an ex-criminal like wildfire. He had already been pissed-off but the fact his mother seemed to enjoy humiliate him in front of their employees had set him off. Before he had realized it, he had already been storming out of the headquarters of the company and sat in the car's passenger seat like a spoiled princess. The mere memory almost made him groan in embarrassment and despair, frowning deeply as he continued to stare dumbly at his feet. He truthfully didn't want to share any eye contact with the barman at the time being, looking at his luxurious shoes lightly glistening under the restaurant's soft lights. He scrunched up his nose slightly, glaring at his dark shoes as if everything were their fault. His attention completely focused on his two feet, he didn't realized Donghae had came to a halt. Therefore, he suddenly collided against his back, squealing pitifully as he bounced back and stumbled backwards. Surprised, the other brunette turned around to give him a curious look. Hyukjae only ducked his head down, mumbling incoherently as his cheeks flushed embarrassingly.

Donghae stared at him emotionless, scrutinizing his face which milky one skin contrasted so much with his own tanned one. His eyes wandered lazily on his features, noting the sharp line of his jaw, his slightly red cheeks, the soft, dark hair falling in front of his single-lidded eyes which looked so much nervous and almost shy at this moment. The freshly new barman didn't really know what to say at this point. He already regretted his short moment of vulnerability he had half a hour earlier, to be honest. One thing he had learned throughout those long, exhausting years in jail, was that he never was allowed to show his weaknesses to anybody. And it was what he had just did, in front of the young, fidgeting with embarrassment, young heir in front of him. Although Donghae had went through so much during all those years, he knew he had to stay strong. Losing hold of his sanity and the shield of his emotions like this morning wasn't something he commonly did, which was why he felt so disoriented.

Donghae inhaled deeply, turning around once again and walked to the other side of the counter bar. Hyukjae only shyly looked up at him to follow his moves until the brunette was settled in front of him, the counter bar separating them. The latter didn't know what to do, only standing up with hesitant eyes as he glanced around him. Donghae didn't say anything, too, only staring at him through his eyelashes.

Hyukjae seemed to be a nice man in his eyes. He looked like he would do anything to fulfill his values and accomplish what he thought was right. It was something that had always impressed Donghae, to be honest ; he remembered with a sliver of nostalgia the reason why he had fell so much in love with Siwon in the first place. He let out a heavy, frustrated sigh as he rested his elbow on the wooden surface of the bar and propped his chin with his palm. Giving an unconsciously charming half-lidded gaze, he slowly looked Hyukjae up and down who couldn't stop himself from blushing a little more. The man was attractive, despite Donghae's stubborn promise not to fall for him ; he was charming, cutely innocent in a kind of way, undeniably handsome and smart. If Donghae's heart wasn't filled with so much evil feelings, he was sure he would probably have tried to flirt with Hyukjae. It also didn't really help him that after seven long years deprived of any kind of pleasure, his ual frustration was practically talking for him every time he saw the other chew seductively - was it even on purpose? - on his soft, thin lips. 

On his part, Hyukjae really didn't know what was happening to him so suddenly. The prior night didn't went like that, if he remembered well - then why was he so flustered every time he felt Donghae's eyes gazing at him. Nibbling on his lower lip again, his teeth played harshly with the soft, fragile pink skin.

"You shouldn't do that," Donghae suddenly spoke up and the other jolted upon hearing his low, deep voice reaching his ears. "You're going to bleed afterwards.

"I'm fine," Hyukjae mumbled but stopped torturing his lips nonetheless. "W - Why are we here, though?"

Donghae shrugged and straightened up. "I have to work in less than two hours and I didn't feel like going home now. I still have to get used to the customs of the place, since I only started yesterday. And you said you wanted to talk. There's a private room at the back of the place."

"It sounds great," The other said, a slight sarcastic tone ringing in his voice.

Donghae let out a small smirk, before he gestured him to follow him. They walked past a tall man with beautiful feminine features, who gave an eccentric introduction of himself. Flabbergasted, Hyukjae had only managed to bow politely at the man who introduced himself as Heechul, before Donghae was already dragging him away, which he was truthfully thankful of. Eventually, the barman closed the door of the small, dark room behind them when they finally went in. Hyukjae released a resigned sigh and sat down on the single couch in the middle of the room.

"If I were you, I wouldn't do that," Donghae pointed out. "Sungmin and your friend spent the night here, if I recall well."

"I really didn't need to remember this," Hyukjae grumbled under his breath as he retreated to an old stool in one corner of the room. He sat on it with a heavy sigh, eliciting a quiet snicker from the other, before he stared at Donghae. His hands on his lap, he chewed on his lower lip again, realizing he had done so an awful lot since he had woke up that morning. "So..." He muttered. "What's it all about? You'd better tell me the truth, else -..."

"You're not really threatening, kid," Donghae rolled his eyes as he leaned back against the door, folding his arms on his chest. "I don't know what you want to know. I was saying the truth this morning. I was really accused and sent to jail for murder. I told you my life wasn't bright and joyful like yours seems to be - no offense."

"None taken," Hyukjae mumbled, silently admitting the other did have a more difficult life than him. "I just - I can't understand why you didn't tell me sooner. I mean, I already shouted to the world we were dating. I even told you my mother is an unconscious cougar, why would you keep this from me?"

"I got released two days ago, Hyukjae."

"You - what?!" He shouted out. "Two days ago?! But you said -..."

"I know what I said," Donghae cut him with emotionless eyes. "But it wouldn't have been credible if I told the truth to your mother. Look I know I probably should have warned you beforehand. But think about it, kid - I was released merely few days ago and everything is a mess in my head, in my life right now. I don't know you, and you don't know me. Today was the very first time I voiced out this cruel reality, and honestly, it still hurts. I'm not usually like this, vulnerable looking, weak and all that jazz. This is at least something I learned in my cellul - not to weaken in front of others. But today isn't a good day - at all."

"Then why did you randomly claimed me as your boyfriend yesterday?" Hyukjae threw his hands in the air with frustration, his eyes widening with slight anger. "I mean, you have to admit this is partially your fault! It sounded fun at first and everything but you should have thought it through before dragging us into that mess. We wouldn't be in this ty situation right now if you hadn't told Siwon we were dating!"

Donghae stayed silent at first, staring at the young heir in front of him.

You could tell him, a voice rang in his head. You could tell him the truth, the real reason why you do all this. Now was the best moment to spill out all the dark thoughts he had in his mind, all the evil plans that involved Hyukjae he had thought of against Siwon. He could, just in one instant, reveal his true motive to the other brunette.

"But isn't it what you wanted?" He asked softly instead. "Didn't you want to get back at him?"

"I - I do but -..." Hyukjae stammered. "I didn't know it would turn out this way. I'm - I don't know what to do anymore."

Donghae stared at him without saying a word. The other brunette looked back at him for a short moment, until he let out a frustrated sigh. "I should punch you in the face and never meet you again."

The other stifled a small laugh and permitted himself to grin slightly. "You actually pointed out a rather interesting question ; why do you even bother talking to me still when you seem to be so angry about all this? You should just shut me out of your life if it bothers you so much."

Hyukjae suddenly blushed furiously, looking at him with wide eyes as he opened then closed his mouth several times before looking at his feet. "Well - it's - I -... Actually, I kind of -... snapped at my mother and - and I told her that I - I already knew all this about you and that I still liked you nonetheless so -... I can't really back off now..."

"You what?" Donghae raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"Yeah..." He mumbled. "And I might have said that I liked bad boys somewhere in the conversation as well..."

Donghae stared at him until an amused grin appeared on his plump lips. "Would you get angry at me if I laughed? Because this is surely hilarious."

"Shut up," Hyukjae retorted with a glare. "This isn't funny at all! I kinda protected you in a way, so you should be thankful, bastard!"

Donghae merely rolled his eyes and scoffed at the other, before folding his arms on his chest in a contemptuous manner." Sorry can't do, bad boys aren't thankful."

The young heir gave him another hard glare, his hair falling in front of his single-lidded eyes. "I have to go back to work," He grumbled unhappily. "Goodness, I'm going to have such a hard time with my co-workers now."

"Sorry," Donghae mumbled and he truly meant it.

Hyukjae shrugged and let out a sigh, before standing up. He glanced up at the barman who raised a curious eyebrow at him. "Umm... Can I sleep over yours tonight again? I probably won't be able to make it home tonight, with my mother and Siwon and everything. I have a lot of work to do tonight so I would understand if you said no, since you sleep in the living-room. The light would bother you, I guess."

"No, that's fine," Donghae said. "It's not what I do best, but I can help you if you want? You know, like helping you with the calculator or something."

The other grinned slightly before he got up. "See you tonight, then."

Donghae nodded, before Hyukjae went out of the room first.

Tonight's going to be a long night... He let out a heavy sigh before following outside, hurrying himself to help his own co-workers.

Thankfully enough, the day went by quickly and Donghae didn't have enough free time to let his dark thoughts ruin his more or less stable mood. Sungmin was by his sides the whole day, trying to cheer him up and squeeze out some information about Hyukjae. The brunette had only chuckled, not replying to his best friend's childish questions. It was as if the strawberry blonde was still acting like a teenager, gossiping about anything and everything. At some point, he successfully managed to drift the topic toward Hyukjae's own best friend, a certain Cho Kyuhyun - the man the other had hooked up with the first night. It didn't take long for him to begin a long speech about how handsome the man was, but that he wasn't looking for a long-term relationship right now. Donghae didn't really continue to listen to him, the strawberry blonde's words sounding like a humming in his ears, as he absently did his task. He was getting more and more used to his new working place, whether he was working as a waiter or as a barman. His colleagues seemed to like him enough to let him go early that night with a big smile on their face even though it was barely midnight. Donghae had thanked them with a grateful smile, feeling his whole body ache after such a long tiring day ; he had begun working since morning until then, and it was sort of understandable why they had let him go home before the others. 

Upon going out of the crowded and heated club, Donghae shivered a little as the cold air surrounded him. Deciding to let the car for Sungmin tonight, he took the subway, almost sleeping the entire ride to the apartment. When he came in, Yoona was already sleeping on the couch again, hugging her blankets tightly. Donghae smiled softly, waking her up gently and inquiring her to go to her own bedroom. The young girl had only yawned slightly, planting a peck on his cheek before tiredly shuffling toward her bedroom. He waited until the door was closed before slumping down on the couch, turning the TV on. Shortly after, as his eyes became heavier and heavier with sleepiness, he heard a soft knock at the front door. He sighed tiredly, getting up and opening the door. He wasn't surprised to recognize the man almost immediately.

Hyukjae looked up at him with hesitation, holding a wallet at one hand and a backpack at the other. Donghae gazed at him silently, forgetting momentarily his manners until the young heir spoke up with a slight frown.

"Can I come in?"

Donghae blinked, before stepping aside and allowing him to go in.

Go big or go home, Lee Donghae.

Choi Siwon abruptly woke up in the middle of the night, his forehead sweating horribly. He let out a heavy pant, feeling his vision clear up and any traces of sleepiness disappear from his system as he recognized his surroundings as his bedroom. He could hear next to him the slow, almost calming breathing of his wife. Mrs. Lee was still sleeping peacefully, not disturbed by Siwon's sudden jolt in his sleep. There weren't any sounds disturbing the silence surrounding the room plunged in the dark. He could almost hear his own heart beating hard and fast in his chest as he carefully sat up on the mattress of the bed. He gazed at his wife, recognizing the few features Hyukjae had inherited from his mother. Precautious not to wake her up, he got up and grabbed dressing gown before putting it on. Despite the fact the room was warmly heated, he felt an uncomfortable shiver run down his spine as he slowly walked to the bay window. Outside, he could see up from the twelfth floor of their posh building the blinding lights of the city still shining brightly. He gazed absently out the window, this uneasy feeling sinking in his whole body as he thought back of the even of the day.

Donghae. The name still resonated to easily, smoothly in his head as he repeated it inwardly over and over again. It had been exactly seven years since the younger was sent in jail, in a imposing and terrifying prison at the farthest outskirts of the city. Something tugged at his heart when he remembered the expression of distraught, anger and sorrow on his ex-lover's face, something that probably could be assimilated vaguely as guilt. Siwon had loved this man with all his heart in the past, and if he had to think about it seriously, he probably still did now. Lee Donghae was handsome, beautiful, smart, nice, perfect. The first time they had met was so many years ago, somewhere in a poor neighborhood so different compared to the district he was currently living in, and Siwon could remember as if it was yesterday the way he had immediately fell in love with him. He had came to cherish everything Donghae had and was inclined to offer him.

But Siwon didn't want to think about the past anymore. He didn't want to remember what he had done and what he was doing to him at this precise moment. The lights of the city flickered with animation as he gritted his teeth tightly. The life he had right now was everything he had always wanted ; being Mrs. Lee's lovely husband had gave him the opportunity to escalate the social ladder quicker than he had ever imagined, even in his most beautiful dreams. He was now rich and controlling the most successful enterprise of all South Korea. A part of him still cringed every time he thought about how much he had sacrificed and how much people he had hurt in consequences, but his greed had truly no limits whatsoever. Choi Siwon loved power and money. He was so, so close to have it all definitely, for the rest of his life. Continuing to live by this old lady's side wasn't even a problem for him anymore. Mrs. Lee wasn't particularly annoying neither clingy, she was actually genuinely nice and adorable - and it didn't mean he couldn't find other women to satisfy his needs, since he was such a successful and handsome man.

The only problem was Lee Hyukjae. This kid was a real obstacle for him to reach his dreams, which were so close it felt like his hand would be able to touch them. The young heir was handsome as well, probably very nice with people he liked, and incredibly intelligent. Way more intelligent than Siwon would have liked him to be. It was probably true as well that the older man should have been a little more cautious when wandering around the kid's father's office, but he hadn't expected him to become such a pain in the . Hyukjae was obviously trying by all means to get rid of him, to discredit him toward the company. Siwon was annoyed by his insolent behavior but he knew he could manage taking care of this problem, until Lee Donghae reappeared. But not only did he came back in his life, shattering the strong shield he had created around his heart ; no, he was now by Hyukjae's sides, apparently dating him. The only thought made him cringe and shake uncontrollably as he glared at the scenery before him. The way those two men had so openly made out in front of him at the bar enraged him more than anything ; he couldn't and didn't want to believe any of this, simply because it was impossible. Lee Donghae loved him, and nobody else than him.

Siwon also knew he wasn't able to use Mrs. Lee to push him away, since it implied revealing their past relationship and therefore about his dark past. If Donghae and Hyukjae happened to join their forces against him somehow, the older was meant to be in huge troubles. He couldn't allow that by any means, even if it meant hurting one of them. 

His eyes turned determined and menacing as he made up his decision.

"Siwon, Darling," He heard Mrs. Lee's sleepy voice call him. "Why aren't you in bed?"

Siwon slightly turned toward the bed and forced a grin. "I'm coming, Darling, don't worry."

He wasn't going to lose this battle ; there were no ways Siwon would let go of the perfect life he had stole. 

Hello, my lovely readers ~

I am sincerely sorry for this very, very late update. But as I said earlier, this story is really giving me a tough time. I'm doing my best though ^^ I'm really not satisfied, actually, because I feel like the plot is messy and I always write the same things over and over again. If anyone of you think it's deteriorating, feel free to tell me so and then - well then, I'll think about an alternative ^^"

I still hope you enjoyed this chapter, though. I'm sorry it's sort of short (just a little bit short) but I missed you guys ~ Hehehe

Thank you for reading ~ Comments, subcribers, upvotes ~ ?