Melancholia exuberantly seemed to reign supreme in the region of the atmosphere up above, joined by the cold night breeze that seemed to have figuratively silhouetted the dampening night air.  Valentine’s numbers were almost up, and the night sky was almost like a black parade, filled with soggy tears and wimping cries, muttering a sad wail of farewell to yet another passing Valentine’s Day. Few stars shimmered, but the almost pitch-black sky was in a whole different league of its ebony shade, compared to any other nights. The sky was totally engulfed in the shadows of the sun.

Good thing that innovation; and some brain-muscle-power from the human race, street lights created, queued along the two sides of the roads that s throughout the city. The dark night was sent trembling again by the light ornaments in each building that stood tall on the face of the city. Seoul was still bustling with the pandemonium of its busyness; almost totally taking the soggy, cold breeze backdrop out of the picture.

But enough about the scenery already…

While life still waltzed along its time line, Seohyun and Lee Seunghyun were swaying their feet along the road back to SNSD’s dorm. They had just gotten back from the theme park via taxi. It had been a fairly interesting Valentine’s day for the both of them that year. Many mischief and mayhem graced the predicament between them that day. But there were also a few times where they caught themselves happy in the presence of each other. As the night wore on endlessly, they continued to walk along the pavement towards SNSD’s member’s second house; sort to speak.

Walking along each other’s side for almost the whole day, had successfully shunned their jittery away when the occasion took place. But every now and then, their heart would still persist to flutter out of control when one suddenly exchanges smile to the other; in this case, it was Seohyun.

Lee Seunghyun didn’t even look at her, but from his side-spy style-looking expertise, he could tell that she was smiling at him. That struck him as a very weird; not-to-mention quite disturbing thing. He really couldn’t read her, especially when she does all these mismatch things that effortlessly opposed the good comments that he had been hearing about her from people around. He swears that trying to make out her true self, is just as hard as a kindergartener trying to read ancient Egyptian’s hieroglyphs without any manual. (imagine it that hard)

Either I’m crazy, or she really is crazily smiling at me?

Come on, V! Get a hold of yourself.

Nothing wrong with taking a quick peek right?

Skillfully, he turned his head to look at her. The first thing that struck his plain of sight, was her face, sweetly smiling at him with one of her innocent-killer-smile. He quickly turned his head to look straight again.

Okay! So I wasn’t crazy after all.

Glad that’s covered.

But why is she smiling like that.

 Humph….

He looked at her direction once again, only this time he continued to stare at her for a very long time. The time seemed just so chimerically slow, as he studied her smiling features; as if he had been staring at her like that for ages (sounds crazy doesn’t it?). He waited for her to stop smiling, but soon he wondered if she even realized what she was doing. He stopped abruptly; and so did she. But the smile still hanged on.

She was starting to make him feel worried; plus uncomfortable. Instinctively he snapped his finger in front of her mesmerized façade. Eureka! (worked like a charm). Consciousness had finally been restored inside her lost brain again; though her reflex was still foggy. As a result, unnecessary words flowed right out of unconsciously, without even trying. And the words of the day were….

“What? Where am I?” (what did I tell ya)

Those were the first few words that she said, and the first thing that she heard was a hysterical laugher; courtesy of Lee Seunghyun. He fell to the ground, rolling on the pavement; and let’s not forget rolling in the aisle too. She looked at him, dumbfounded by him jostling in merriment. She turned to look around; just to check that there was no one around to capture the crazy play, with their presumably befogged masquerade. She crouched next to him, the figure that was now lying on the ground patting in fatigue.

He was still giggling when they stared at each other; one with a shock-stricken expression and the other with a cockeyed expression that mouthed the word, ‘seriously?’. Disbelief filled his face, as he watched the muddleheaded expression printed on hers. She shook her head and raised her shoulders; her body language, telling him that she really didn’t have, even the slightest idea of what was going on.

“What’s wrong with you?”

“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? Why are you laughing like this all of the sudden?”

“Exactly my point”

“What?” Seohyun was still having a hard time understanding him.

“Seriously, you don’t know” she shook her head.

“Forget it. You’re hopeless,” he slowly got back on his two feet. The smile and laughter had already disappeared from him. She was still watching him closely. He tidied up and straightened back his ruffled attire, and stared at her afterwards. Silent stare occupied the next few minutes between them, before he swiftly turned back around and started to walk ahead of her. She saw him shaking his head from behind. She really didn’t know what had actually happened that made him laughed so hard.

“Oh! Don’t zone off again, okay. Thanks,” Seohyun looked at him with her mystified look again.

What is this boy saying?

What’s gotten into him?

Huh….

She resumed to dog his steps, before she finally caught up with him. He just shook his head; and smiled, as he noticed her walking next to him again. They were closing on their destination. SNSD’s dorm was just around the corner. He wasn’t saying anything and just continued to walk. She didn’t know why she suddenly felt jumpy at that moment. Her eyes automatically searched the area without the guidance of her consciousness. She didn’t even know what she was looking for, when the sight of an empty bench suddenly caught the attention of her prying eyes.

“Hey! Let’s go sit there”

“Why?”

“Just because”

“Why?”

“Huh….cause I’m kinda tired”

“Why?”

“Would you stop asking that?”

“We’re almost at your dorm. Can’t you just drag your tired legs for just a few more steps?”

Her expression suddenly turned into a frown. She didn’t answer his question. Instead she just forged ahead towards the bench and got herself seated there. She sat there; hands crossed, waiting for him to do the same. He simply gawked at her with a level of bewilderedness that was above the normal bench-mark. He seriously didn’t know what she was thinking at that time or where she was going with the whole theatrical act, all of the sudden. After a long thought, he gradually gave in, and just walked towards her direction. She saw him coming and was glad that he was doing so. But now what?  She didn’t even know why she suddenly felt like sitting there, or why she dragged him along with her.

What now genius?

Why did I even force him to sit here with me?

Oh, no! He’s coming.

What should I do?

“Well?” he asked as he finally got himself comfortable on the bench next to her. She rummaged through her screwed up thoughts for a believable excuse; but she just couldn’t come up with one. Seeing her condition, Lee Seunghyun raised one of his eyebrows. The air suddenly turned silent between them; and it remained in the air for a few more minutes. 5 whole minutes had already passed, and she was still silent. He looked at his wristwatch and finally noticed that it was already 11:13 o’clock. He looked at her again, only to have his eyes met with the same sight of her being blank and all. He stared at his watch, then at her again.

“It’s getting late, and your dorm is just a short walk away. So, I guess I should be going now,” he stood up and held out his hand. He only wanted to shake hands with her, but there was no response from the other party. She just sat there and gawked at his hand like she was looking at something so unbelievable that she had to tell the whole world about it. But it was just his hand. He waited for a few more second. When he was sure that she didn’t want to shake hands with him, he put his hand into his pocket and started to walk away when suddenly….

“Wait. Don’t go. Just, please don’t leave me yet. Can’t you stay with me for a tad bit longer? Please,” she was now standing to his almost-leaving-her, self.

“What did you say?”

“Just stay for a while, please. I just don’t want you to leave yet,” he could have sworn that she almost sounded like she was crying and pleading to him. He eyed her. She was staring down at the ground, as if to avoid any eye-contact with him. She was also gripping his hand that he had offered to shake with hers just now. She was holding it tightly with both hands, not wanting to let go of it at all. The situation was dead awkward and he didn’t even have any idea of what to do in that sort of situation.

“Okay, I’ll seat. But you’ve got to tell me what’s bothering you?”

“That’s exactly my problem.”

“What is?” he was now standing right in front of her. She was still looking down, so he couldn’t really tell what she might have been feeling at that time, without the trusted aid of her facial expression.

“Well….,” she hesitated.

“Well. Just tell me, what is it?”

“I just don’t know,” she suddenly lifted her head when she said that. That’s when it became crystal clear to him. Her eyes were watery, and he could tell that she had been sobbing all this while. A pang of guilt suddenly hit him; like an out of the blue, bullet train that was travelling at speeds that would’ve broken the sound-barrier like the matter was just a piece of cake. He seriously felt guilty at that time, just by looking at her face. Even though he didn’t know what he could have possibly done to her to make her like that, but he still felt like he was at fault. Call it a hunch or anything, but he knew that she was being like that because of him; only, he didn’t know what the problem was that had him, mixed up in the equation.

“Okay, let’s just seat first, then talk”

“No!”

“No?”

“Yes! I mean…No!”

“Why? Didn’t you want me to seat?” now, his thoughts were seriously mystified in so many levels that it was physically hurting his short-circuited brain.

“Why should we even seat here?”

“What? You tell me. You’re the one who wanted to seat here in the first place,” he retorted her question with a reminder of what she had just said. He was also careful not to raise his voice, as to keep things calm. Her emotions were already unstable at that moment; and the last thing he wanted was her going Krakatoa on him all of the sudden.

“What I meant is, we’re not gonna seat there, until we know why”

“Then tell me why”

“Because….,” she paused for a while. Lee Seunghyun waited patiently for her to answer. Her face was contorted in such serious manner as she thought about the answer. Her expression almost made him laugh, but he kept it in, in an effort to keep things austere. The moments of silence wore on for a few more minutes before he reckoned that she had finally manage to muster just enough self-confidence to utter the answer.

“I just don’t want you to leave my side. That’s all. I’ve had this feeling before, but now it’s stronger, and I don’t know why. But one thing’s for sure. I really want you to stay here with me. Just stay,” she was now, seriously pleading; like a good wife, on the verge of being divorced by his good husband for a mistake that she knew was unforgivable (okay, weird metaphor, but its true).

She didn’t know why, but when she said that she had felt the same feeling before, her mind instantly started to recapture the moment when she said goodbye to the boy that ate jajangmyun with her, and bought her the bunny-shaped bag that she still held dear to this very day, when she was little. It was automatic. She really felt like it was the same feeling that settled into her heart when she got herself departed from that boy; only this time, the boy was none other than Lee Seunghyun.

Why, oh why is this happening again?

Why him?

Why does he keep reminding me of that boy?

But I don’t care

I just want him to still be here with me. I don’t know why, but I really do.

Am I falling for him?

Am I really falling for you oppa?   

“Are you trying to make a move on me?”

“What?”

“Just joking,” Lee Seunghyun laughed at her stumped expression before they got themselves seated on the bench again comfortably. She eyed him furiously now.

Oppa, sometimes I just don’t know whether I should hug you, or kill you………..