Love?

The Matchmaker's Masterplan !!

" W...w..wah?  " came  Jongup's terrified, squeaky voice. Himchan was moving backwards, step by step, pulling Jongup with him.

Wait.... Dawook is real?.... thought Daehyun in surprise. The shadow was still in the exact same spot.

" We... we're goners..." whimpered Jongup.

" No not yet. We're just 18.. Shall we beg for mercy? " asked Himchan his voice barely audible.

Daehyun shouldered his backpack and began to walk towards  the shadow. Whoever it is, is gonna see .... 'the wrath of the  Dae',  he thought smirking.

" NO DAEHYUN!! DON'T! HE'LL KILL YOU! "

The shadow couldn't hold it any longer. It began to walk to them.

" RUN!" yelled himchan tugging at Jongup and pulling Daehyun by the collar. 

" Come back you idiot! I thought I told you to not move an inch, until you cleaned all the toilets! " bellowed a man as the lights in the corridor lit up, revealing a tall boy, with a broom and mop behind him.

" AW! You are such a loser!!! Those two were half dead and you jumped in and ruined it!! "the boy whined, walking to the broom and grabbing it angrily.

" CLEAN ..!!!!!!" bellowed the voice.

The boy began mopping the corridor furiously.

" Zelo.....? That was.... you?" asked Jongup stepping out from behind Himchan, who was staring at the tall boy in shock..

" Wait.... so...wait wait wait WAIT..... WHAT THE HECK WERE YOU THINKING HUH!!? " Himchan yelled, turning back to his normal self.

" Oh. I just heard the story, so I thought ' hey! maybe I should scare them! ' ya know?"

" No I don't. What are you doing here anyway? " asked Himchan, folding his arms across his chest.

"Detention, with the janitor as usual "sighed Zelo 

'' Again? " asked Jongup. Zelo nodded. " Yeah, since I repeatedly got detention, I kinda got used to it, so I come everyday afterschool to help the janitor...I'm sort of like his asisstant "
 

" STOP BLABBERING AND CLEAN THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE!" came the janitor's voice from somewhere. Zelo picked up the bucket and mop. Waving, he left the three boys.

" Stupid Kid " muttered Daehyun. But it was fun watching those two imbeciles squirm in terror  he smiled evilly. 

" So Daehyun, let me see. What was it that you were saying about who...? Oh yeah, 'Dawook? ' " asked Jongup, crossing his arms and tapping a foot. Himchan smirked evilly.

But Daehyun showed them the loser sign. Before they could do anything, he ran away, Jongup and Himchan in hot pursuit.

*******************************************

" So... you'll be busy the whole day? " asked Daehyun from Jongup. He was planning to pair up Jongup with a girl and also, the two of them had a project due. But pairing up Jongup came first. So not having Jongup was an issue.

Did Jongup know Daehyun's plans for him? Nope.

In the end, a forlorn Daehyun stepped out of his house, deciding to go for a walk and enjoy the fresh air.

Now what? I need Jongup for my plan. What did he say? Oh yes. " Oh I'm sorry Daehyun but we got such a lot of homework! And the project is due next month!" 

I like early starts. Plus I, as a businessman, hate to wait. The twerp. 

Just then he heard familiar voices.Turning his head to a side, he saw Jongup. And Himchan. Sitting, On a parkbench ....laughing together.

Daehyun felt the anger rising within him. Why that freak. Homework huh? Oh this time I'm gonna kill him.....

Wait ...What are they doing in a kids' park? Isn't this place for kids? Hmm. Maybe if I told some angry kids that their park is now being taken over by adults...?

" Hey you! Gimme your lunch money" he heard a voice  behind him. Daehyun turned around. " Huh?" he exclaimed looking from side to side. " Down here mister" came the voice again. He looked down to see a short, little boy, his arm raised, asking Daehyun for his money. He had spiky short hair and was wearing a black tank top, trying to look threatening.

" You want money? "  asked Daehyun mockingly. " Shut up and gimme your money. Or I'll kill you" threatened the boy scowling.

" Whatever kid."

Just then he got a brilliant idea. " Hey kid. If you join me to spy on two people, I'll pay you " he said, a plan forming in his head.

" Huh?"

" See those two dorks over there? They're planning to do something to your mom. "

" She's abroad" 

" Your dad "

" I don't mind "

" Your grandparents."

 They're dead"

" Ok... forget it. So will you join me? "

" What's  in it for me? "

" Money  and you can annoy them "

" AAAAhhhhhhhhhh.... ok!  "

Both highfived.

***************************************************

" Ok. Your name is .... Rob. and I am Rupert " said Daehyun, handing a uniform and cap to the little boy.

" So ....we are going to sell hot dogs.... to them? " Rob asked, taking his uniform gingerly.

" Yeah yeah. Kind of. We can sell it to anyone and get money as well "  said Daehyun thoughtfully. " Why cant you just go ask them? " asked the boy grumpily. " Shut up Rob. Let's get to work " said Daehyun, tying an apron around his waist. " Where's my mask? why do I always forget it when i need it? " he muttered checking his pockets.

" Hey Robert! look at me! " yelled the kid. Daehyun looked to see the kid wearing a fake moustache. ' Hmm...this can replace my mask... ' he snatched it off the kids upper lip.

" OW! HEY!! THAT'S MINE!!! I WANT IT BACK!" yelled the kid,  lunging at Daehyun, who caught him by the collar and held him up.

He then stared at the kid. Hard. The kid stared back.  Then the kid riveted his eyes over Daehyun's shoulders and they widened. " They're coming! Quick!" he squeaked, struggling in Daehyun's fist.

Daehyun let him go quickly. " Ok to your position " he hissed and in a moment he was standing behind a steaming hotdog cart  with the kid next to him. " Go tend to the sausages you idiot" hissed Daehyun, pushing the kid towards a grill. " you" mumbled the kid. 

" LOOK HIMCHAN! HOTDOGS!! " cheered Jongup running to the cart.

Ha ! now I  shall find out...

" Hello sir. Anything that interests you? "asked Daehyun politely, bowing a little. 

" WOW! THERE' S SUCH A VARIETY! HIMCHAN!!!! " yelled Jongup, motioning for Himchan to come over.

" Shut u-" Daehyun covered his mouth quickly. Thank gods Jongup was too busy trying to get Himchan over. After awhile Himchan appeared, looking tired.

" You. what do you want to b-- I mean. Hi. What you see is  lovely right? The prices are as lovely. We sell---" 

" Urgh. You remind me of someone...I wonder who..? " said Himchan thoughtfully staring at Daehyun. 

" YEAH!! HE ACTED IN THAT ADVERTISEMENT TO PROMOTE EQUALITY!!!! " yelled Rob from the back.

" OMO!!! WHAT WAS THAT?! " asked Jongup, placing a hand over his chest.  

" I'M A WORKER!" yelled the kid appearing beside Daehyun.

" What? You're getting work done by a kid?! " gasped Himchan outraged. 

" No no. Of course not!! " exclaimed Daehyun.*laughs weakly*

" STOP LYING ROBERT!!! YOU SAID THAT IF I DON'T, YOU'LL HURT MY MOM AND DAD AND THEN ME!!!" sobbed the kid

" WHAT!!! WHEN DID I SAY THAT YOU--"

" Jongup. Give me that hotdog " snapped Himchan, snatching the hotdog from Jongup. He flung it at Daehyun, and it smacked onto his chest. 

" HAHA!!!" laughed Rob pointing at Daehyun's face, which was gradually turning a beetroot red. 

" YOU... HOW DARE YOU--" he snarled but the two boys were gone. 

" Well.... that failed " said Rob shrugging.

Daehyun's  head snapped towards the boy, his moustache lopsided, glasses glinting behind eyes of anger.

" Uh Oh......" 

**********************************************

" Okay. This is plan B. Now if you mess up, I'll break your teeth".

Daehyun was with Rob. It was Sunday and Jongup refused to do the project even on Sunday. So according to Daehyun's calculations, he was with Himchan... at Himchan's place.

This time, Daehyun's plan was to use the boy as a scout selling cookies. 

" BUT GIRLS DO THAT!! " protested the boy.

" Oh, so that's why my cousin gave me a dress! " said Daehyun, holding a navy blue dress before a horrified Rob.

" I can't wear that! I'm a manly guy ok! This will destroy my masculine reputation! " he complained, wringing his hands. Daehyun lowered the dress and eyed the kid up and down, with a raised brow.

" Masculine? Right. Shut up and get dressed or I'll tie you to a tree... surrounded by cactus plants " he threatened seriously. The kid blinked several times. " No, really. I've done it before. Ask Jongup " he added very seriously. The kid snatched the dress and angrily pulled it over his head. " It's too tight" he whined, but Daehyun ignored him and took the lead. 

In 20 minutes they were at Himchan's place. " Ring the doorbell " said Rob poking Daehyun. " Don't touch me. And wait. You are the girlboyscout. So you ring it " he urged, pushing the kid. " No! You do it!!" yelled the kid. " SSSHHH!!! We're spying!!! so shut that mouth of yours!".

 "Ring it!! " said the kid. Daehyun pushed the kid who rang the doorbell. 

" TTTTRRRRRRRRRRIIIING!!!!!!!"

"WWWWAAAARGH!!!! WHERE ARE THE COOKIES!!!! " screamed the kid jumping up and down.

" Shut up. Do something about the cookies " said Daehyun, dissapearing behind a clump of bushes.

" WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!!? YOU ER!!! HOW COULD YOU---"

" Uh......" the door was open, revealimg a very confused Jongup.

*Clears throat* " Hello mister Jon--- uh.... mister!!" the kid said brightly. Jongup stared back.

" So.... Nice house"

He heard an angry growl from the bushes. " Uh.. I..."

" OH!!! GIRL SCOUTS!!! what are you selling? " asked Jongup relaxing. The kid glanced at the bushes but saw nothing.

" Where are your cookies? " asked Jongup confused.

" You see, I'm a poor boy. These are the clothes I found in a dumpster, so actually I'm not selling anything. I need help "  said Rob sniffing. 

Jongup stared.

" You see, when I was very young, a man wearing glasses and a mask, killed my family but I survived. I hid..... uh.... in the tree house my dad build for me "*sniff* " It was the final memory of dad  " *tears up* "And now he's gone!!! GONE I TELL YOU!!! they all left me!!!! " *SOB*

He fell onto his knees and raised his arms to the heavens. " HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!!!! WHY DAD!!!? MOM!!!?  SIS?!!! I know you're okay up there..." he wailed. His wailing grew louder. 

" Sssh... calm down kid. You look starved. Why don't you come on in? i'm baking with a friend of mine. You can help too." 

' Bingo '  thought Daehyun, smirking

*********************************************

After about 15 minutes Daehyun crept to the window and peeped in. The instant he did, he felt like punching the wall. The kid, instead of trying to see what Jongup and Himchan were doing, hanging out alone together, was eating ice cream and brownies, chatting to his hearts content, while Jongup and Himchan sat on the couch, listening, laughing occasionally.

Daehyun tried to get the kids attention, and after about 5 minutes, the kid glanced at the window. Daehyun pointed at the kid and then ran a finger across his throat. The kids eyes widened. But he continued to talk.

Finally Daehyun couldn't hold it back. He walked to the door and stormed in. Ignoring Himchan and Jongup, he grabbed the kid by the collar and marched out.

" AAAARRRRRGGGGH!!!! KIDNAPPER!!! !!!! E!!!! AAARRGH!!! HELP ME!!! Oh!!! It's you...." gasped the kid, his yells subsiding.

Once at Daehyun's house;

" So, What did you find? " 

" Huh? Jongup can cook " 

" No. About them ? "

" Who? "

" WHAT DID YOU DISCOVER ABOUT THE TWO OF THEM!!? WHY ARE THEY TOGETHER!? "

" Oh! Why didn't you ask? I didn't ask them, but its obvious "

Daehyun glared at the kid.

He shrugged. " Anyone can figure it out. You may be smart in a lot of stuff, but in love you're not, unlike me. Now then, my mom is coming today, so I'm going. BYE!! " he yelled, leaving.

Daehyun who forgot to kick the kid, stood rooted to the spot.

 What? Me?!  not smart when it comes to love? Ha! This kid doesn't know who I am. The best matchmaker in town. Hmph!  Me not knowing about love! Pfft .

 I do.........Right?  

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N : HAHA!!! You guys thought that Zelo was Yongguk!! HAHA!! Ok ok don't kill me now !! haha!! 

THANKS FOR COMMENTING AND SUBSCRIBING!!!!!!! :D

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Petachi
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Comments

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Dewdropz #1
Chapter 11: I read this story over and over again. Its so funny. I love fiesty daehyun and yongguk and everyone else. One of my favorite stories. ♥ You have written such a great fic. :)
bygjdh #2
Chapter 26: Never get tired of this brutally funny randomly fic
I can say that this is the funniest fanfic that i've ever read and i love it with every little piece of my heart
Usually i dont like Ocs but this fic was the excep, i love the barbarian students (kyung sumin gina ily) the teacher, the janitor, the random boy, dae parents, the monkey huhuhuhuhuhu
damchubiased
#3
Chapter 9: Himchan's answer to the riddle lol
damchubiased
#4
I'm down and stressed. I will read this again to lift up my mood, while I'm waiting for "vindictive people" update.
Your story makes me happy (⌒_⌒)
DumaTrz #5
Chapter 27: Ohgodohgodohgodohgod how didn´t I see this earlier 7u7 You are just.. awesome (more than awesome ;; even) This story is one of the best comedies I´ve read so far. God, I couldn´t stahp laughing all the time, I blame you for that :c
JunYoung1004
#6
Chapter 27: You are awesome ! I spend two whole night with your story and I won't regret it. *crying for no reason* I love it as much I love Zelo. Lol XD
uXknowme
#7
Chapter 27: This story is funny! XD There's no way I didn't laugh!

My favourite part is the splat splat pooping sound in the chapter where Dae hid inside a cubicles X'D VERY HILLARIOUS!
Oh! I have a question! So Dae is really innocent? Till the end?? And at the end he likes Yongguk back right?? Nyahahaha there's mention of but no M rated here
bdz357998 #8
Chapter 26: This was hilarious!!!
proudweirdo
#9
Chapter 26: lol thank god i have read this again after a year. wait.. was it really a year? how could i be unsure :( but ahhh srsly, this is the best story for me. XD i remember i kept re-reading this and i cant stop laughing.. and now.. omfg you really are the best author ;u; the type of story you'll never get bored by re-reading it over and over again. *u*