Chapter 5: Thoughts

Four months, Soojung has been pretending as Taemin's girlfriend, believing to what Jinri had said to her weeks ago 'I'm sure he have the same feelings for you Soojung, he's just confused how to express his love for you, give him some time to show it to you.' but Soojung never seen such a thing when they were together. Well, they did acting like a couple but it only when they were around his teammates and after that he never care about her. Days, weeks, and months passed and Soojung kept waiting for Taemin to at least say he missed her, or like her for real but it didn't happen though, he would only say something like you're cute or you're funny to her.

She's tired and frustrated with this whole pretend-to-be-a-couple thing, she doesn't want to make her hopes up only to be ruined by the reality that Taemin will never be in love with her. So, after so many sleepless nights passed, Soojung thinks it is the right time for her to just gave up on Taemin. She was sure it is best thing to do, Taemin and her aren't meant for each other.

Yeah, it's better to do that now before it hurts you more Soojung. Move on Soojung, move on!

"Soojung-ah, what are you doing? Vic unni called you earlier." Jinri voice interrupts her thoughts, she nods and tried to sounds casual. "Yeah, I know but I'm not hungry."

"Is there something wrong, baby?" Jinri who poked her head from the door said, she walked to sat beside Soojung on her bed and looking at her best friend worriedly.

"I'm okay." Soojung faked a smile, but Jinri knows her better.

"You're not, tell me about it."

"It's nothing, I swear!" Soojung tried her best to make her expression as cheerful as she can, but Jinri shook her head and shoot her with a don't-pretend-you-are-okay-when-you-are-not look. Soojung sighed in defeat, she doesn't want to make anyone worry about her, Jinri have her own problems already and she doesn't want to add her problems to make it worse.

"Is it about him?" It's sounds more like a statement than a question. Soojung nodded unconsciously as she looked up at Jinri with a bitter smile.

"I can't do it anymore, I don't want to wait any longer." She quietly said as Jinri pulled her in a comforting hug and her hair softly.

Soojung was trying to look stronger as she pulled off of the hug and smiled to her best friend who smiled back at her.

"Do what you think is right. I will always be here to support you."

Unable to say appropriate words to shows how grateful she was to have Jinri by her side all this time, she could only hugged her best friend again as tears quietly escaped from her beautiful eyes.

***

It has been four months since he asked her to be his fake girlfriend, and nothing happened. Corrected, he didn't make it happen. Two weeks ago he had his chance to confess his feelings for Soojung but he messed it up because he told himself he wasn't ready at that time. Last week, at the end of the event when both of their groups were in, he had this perfect time where he could just lean in and kiss her on the lips but he missed it, again because he thought he wasn't ready for that. There were many other chances but he kept messing it up.

Why did it was so hard for him to just confess his true feelings for her?

Was it because of he was afraid of a rejection?

No, he was not. He had been rejected before, and he was okay after that. Then why?

Why Lee Taemin?

You're such a fool, Lee Taemin.

Aish!

"What's wrong with you?" Key shoots him with a peculiar stare as he sat beside him on the couch with a remote TV in his hand, trying to find something fun to watch on the screen.

"Nothing." Taemin replied flatly, do not bother with the look on Key's face.

"Did you two fight?"

"No."

"Okay."

"No."

"I said it's okay. Why did you sounds annoyed?"

"I'm not."

"Fine. I'm lost my interest to find something to watch really, I'm going to sleep!" With that Key stood up and walked to his room while stamped on his foot, feeling upset with maknae's replies.

Taemin sighed, he should be in the bed by now since tomorrow will be a busy day for him, but this thought suddenly popped in his head and it made him feel horrible this whole night. After another 20 minutes passed by he decided to clear his mind and went to the veranda. It's so cold outside but he feel a little bit better than earlier.

"Nah, that's okay princess. Hey, I'm not fat! I'm hungry that's why I decide to cook something but luckily there are some snacks in the fridge so I decide to eat those instead of cooking. You should sleep by now, I'm sure you also have so much things to do tomo—Oops! Princess, I'm hang up now, will call you in the morning, sleep tight 'kay." Jinki quickly ended up his phone call as soon as Taemin's eyes landed on him. Jinki smiled sheepishly, tried to hide his embarrassment.

"I didn't saw you there. Why are you still awake?"

"Is that Jessica noona?" Even in the dark Taemin could see a blush on his hyung's face.

"Yup, who else that I called their name by princess?"