I don’t like crying and I don’t like the rain… but I like crying in the rain. Why? Because no one can tell I’m crying.

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I woke up in my room later that night. “What the…?” I said, scratching my head. How’d I get in my room? My thoughts were interrupted when someone knocked on my door.

“Key! It’s Jonghyun! I brought back food for you.” I thought he was mad at me? I crawled off my bed and opened the door. I was hesitant at first, not knowing if I should let him in but I had to – it was his room too. “Key, I’m glad you’re alright!”

My eyes widened and my heart started beating faster. “You are?” I asked him, surprised.

“Yeah! A couple minutes after you left I ran outside to look for you. I found you in the park an hour later. I’m not sure if you were asleep or unconscious so I brought you back to the dorm.”

So he carried me? I looked down as my cheeks started to burn. “Thank you.” I told him quietly.  He nodded and smiled.

And then it was quiet.

He suddenly broke the silence by muttering something I didn’t understand. “What?”

“I—I said I’m sorry.” He repeated. I was confused. Sorry for what? He didn’t do anything wrong. He was being his perfect self.

Jonghyun’s POV:

I was guilty. When I found him outside, I noticed the tear stains on his cheek. I knew it was because he was crying. I knew why he was crying and I knew it was because of me.

*flashback*

I watched as Key ran towards the door, tears running down his cheeks. In my head, I was screaming “No! Key! Don’t leave!” But I was too shocked that nothing left my mouth.

I stayed there, dumbfounded. What just happened? Did Key and I just… kiss?

My eyes were glued to the door. Where the heck is Key going?

I stood up and ran outside. “Damn, it’s raining!” I said as the droplets kept splashing me in the face. I started to run, covering the top of my head with my jacket. My vision began to get blurry. It was foggy. I couldn’t see anything. I felt something. Something that made me certain that he was at the park… so, I ran to the park. The park where I met my best friend for the first time.

There was a dark figure on a bench. “Key?” I whispered. I darted toward the person and found Key lying on the bench. Is he unconscious or just asleep? I picked him up and ran back to our dorm. How long has he been there? I asked myself. I walked up to our room and laid him on his bed.

He looked so peaceful. I grabbed a hot towel from the kitchen and placed it on his face, removing his tear stains. I sighed. “Does Key like me?” I asked myself.

“Duh.” I heard from behind me. I looked back and saw Minho leaning against our doorframe.

“Minho, when did you get here?”

“Like 5 minutes ago. Taemin and Onew are here too. They told me to go find you and Key so we can go out for dinner.” He explained to me. I nodded my head.

“I’ll go get ready. I’ll see you later.” I pushed him out of my room and that word kept replaying in my head.

Duh?Is he saying that it’s obvious that Key likes me? I quickly got ready and decided to let Key rest for a while. I walked out to where the 3 were waiting. “Let’s go. Key’s asleep and I didn’t want to wake him.” They all nodded and we headed out for dinner.

*end of flashback*

“I’m sorry.” I told him.

“Sorry? For what? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

I looked down. “I just feel like I haven’t been there for you, y’know?”

He slowly nodded. “It’s okay. You’re busy with SM the Ballad and with Se Kyung.” I flinched as he said her name. I looked up and he covered his mouth.

“Sorry hyung.” I smiled as he apologized. Key is my best friend. We never get mad at each other and he’s the only one that I can trust with my life. Without him, I don’t know how my life would have turned out. The happiest day of my life was when I met Key.

Without speaking, I walked towards Key and hugged him tightly. “Why did you run off earlier?” I asked, still holding onto him.

“Err, well… I just thought you were going to hate me.” He said, nervously.

“Me? Hate you? Never!” I reassured him.

He started to talk again. “About the kiss I—“

“Just forget about it. Put that behind us, araso?” I said, interrupting him. He nodded sadly. “Are you okay?”  I asked as I felt Key sigh.

“Are you going to let go or what?” I looked down and noticed I was still hugging him. I pulled away and saw that his hands were already at his sides.

How long was I hugging him? Aish, how embarrassing!

“Key, we brought back some food for you.” I said, pulling him into the kitchen.

Key rubbed his eyes as he followed me, obviously still tired. “You guys went out to dinner without me?”

“Well you were asleep. I didn’t want to wake you.” He nodded, while his face stayed blank. “Eat up.” I said, pushing the food in front of him.

“Kamsahmnida.” He whispered, taking a bite out of his food.

The awkwardness was palpable. “Are we still doing, y’know, the plan?” I asked, looking at him.

He looked up, confused. “What plan – oh.”

Key's POV:

I forgot. I have to be his boyfriend. Oops, sorry. I mean fake boyfriend. I looked at him and his face made it clear that he wanted me to say yes. I nodded as he took a sigh of relief. I suddenly just lost my appetite. “I’m done.” I said coldly as I pushed the food away from me.

He nodded as he took my food and through away my food. I walked upstairs to our room and changed out of my clothes. I ignored Jonghyun as he went inside the bathroom. I slid into my bed, pulling the comforter over my head.

My mind was filled with Jonghyun and Se Kyung. I pictured them together as I was watching them afar, crying. I imagined myself crying… but that soon turned into reality. I touched my cheeks and felt tear streaks. “Ugh.” I whispered. I wiped my tears quickly when I heard Jonghyun walk out of the bathroom.

“Good night.” He said, going to bed.

“Mhm.” Was all I said. I wasn’t in the mood to talk to him. Nowadays, it just hurt to talk to him. I know that he will never return my feelings. The way I feel for him is the same way he feels for Se Kyung.

I closed my eyes once again as I started to cry. I began to feel tired and eventually fell asleep, thinking about Jonghyun.