Minho had tried to go on like everything was normal, like he wasn’t having a serious moral conflict, and like he wasn’t having dreams that left him in an almost painfully aroused state. Jonghyun’s words from the day they went to the mall two weeks prior were echoing in his head.

“If I said I wanted to do something, could we try it?”

He felt like a ert after realizing Jonghyun was asking to fight his fears, and it had left him wondering why he had even thought of it in such a dirty way. He was so afraid to try when the thought first occurred, but the more he thought about it, the more he questioned that fear. He was finding fewer and fewer reasons to be afraid.

He was trying to focus on Jonghyun’s upcoming 17th birthday, being that it was only two and a half weeks away, but even with the boy curled up beside him he was having serious thoughts of taking their relationship a step farther. There was another issue, too. So far, Jonghyun had gone along with everything Minho had tried, but did that mean he was ready for that?

He didn’t know what to do. All the time he had spent thinking he wasn’t ready for such an intimate act were now put into question. Was he ready now? And if he was, what was the reason? Had enough time passed? Had he matured enough? Or was it just Jonghyun? He wanted - no - he needed to talk to someone about it, but who could he talk to? He looked down at Jonghyun and sighed. He leaned over, pressing his lips to Jonghyun’s temple and breathing in the elders scent. He let out a small sigh, and gently slipped out from under Jonghyun.

He stepped off the bed and started walking toward the door, only pausing when he heard a gentle whine behind him. He turned back automatically, and watched his boyfriend sleeping with slightly opened eyes. He smiled softly, then continued on his way out the door. He went across the hall, knowing Key and Taemin were still up. He was surprised to only find Taemin on the other side of the door, but also slightly relieved.

“Minho-hyung?” Taemin said, and the elder stepped into the room. Taemin shut the door, his expression confused.

“How did you know when you were ready to have with Key?” Minho blurted out, and Taemin blushed right away.

“Wh-what makes you think we’ve-” Taemin stuttered, and Minho raised a brow.

“Taemin. Please. Jonghyun knows.” Minho said, waving him off. Taemin turned a shade darker, and took a seat on his bed.

“W-well, why do you think you’re not ready?” Taemin asked. Minho plopped down beside him.

“I don’t know that I’m not.” Minho said. “I wanted it to be someone I trusted. Someone I loved. Someone I really thought was the one.”

“And Jonghyun’s all of that.” Taemin said. Minho nodded.

“It’s more than that though. He’s so cute, but when he kisses me...no when we kiss each other, it’s so amazing. We get so caught up, and when we take it a little farther he’s just so-” Taemin held up a hand.

“Don’t!” Taemin said. “You’re both my hyungs, and I’ll never be able to look at you the same if you tell me.”

“Mian, Taeminnie.” Minho said. “I just...I want to make sure that I’m not making a mistake.”

“Minho, you’re not. I know you, and I know him. It’s not going to be just to get off. It’s going to be to get closer.” Taemin said. “And if you’re worried about it hurting, don’t worry. I’ve tried it, and it’s completely worth it.”

“Y-you’ve tried it?” Minho stuttered out. “Y-you mean, K-Key bottoms?”

“Well. You know.” Taemin said, shrugging. “Just trust me. As long as you stretch yourself first, that’s the closest you’ll ever feel to him. If you don’t, you’ll just be mad at him.”

“I just remembered I have to...to give Jonghyun a-a massage!” Minho said, nodding and springing up. Taemin snorted as Minho ran out, then fell back on his bed.

“Have fun!” He called out.

Minho shut the door firmly behind him, then headed back into his own room. He was surprised to find Jonghyun sitting up, looking a little confused. Minho went to the bed quietly, and pulled Jonghyun closer to him. The elder settled against his dongsaeng, and Minho kissed his forehead.

“Where’d you go?” Jonghyun asked, a sleepy tone to his voice. Minho smiled softly.

“I just had to talk to Taemin about something.” Minho said.

“About what?” Jonghyun asked, looking up at him.

“Don’t worry about it.” Minho said. “Did I wake you?”

“Ani.” Jonghyun whispered. “I forgot to take my pill.”

“Did you have a bad dream?” Minho asked. Jonghyun shook his head.

“How about you try not to take it tonight?” Minho asked. Jonghyun nodded slowly, cuddling closer.

“Minho?” Jonghyun said. Minho glanced down.

“De?” He asked. Jonghyun pouted adorably, his lips sticking out.

“Can I have a kiss?” He asked. Minho nodded, leaning in and pressing his lips to the elder’s mouth. Jonghyun sighed softly into the kiss, and Minho smiled.

“Let’s go to sleep, ok?” Minho suggested, and Jonghyun nodded, cuddling against him.

Minho hated skinship for the longest time before Jonghyun came along. It would always confused him if someone pet his hair, or snuggled under a blanket with him, but didn’t feel anything toward him. With Jonghyun, though, he had taken the initiative. He touched Jonghyun, played with his hair, cuddled him, and in general just wanted to be near him. He didn’t ever anticipate that it would be this beautiful thing, but it was.

He slipped his arm under Jonghyun’s neck, then wrapped the other around his body and pressed his lips to his forehead. Jonghyun giggled slightly, before tangling his legs with Minho’s and settling his head against Minho’s chest. Minho laughed quietly, and Jonghyun looked up at him with a smile.

“Minho-ya.” He said suddenly, and Minho raised a brow.

“What is it, Jjongie?” Minho asked.

“I love you.” Jonghyun said, his tone serious. Minho seemed surprised, but nodded slowly.

“I love you too, Jonghyun.” Minho returned. Jonghyun didn’t look away, or cuddle with him again as Minho had expected him too, instead just staring at him.

“Minho.” Jonghyun said firmly, and Minho blinked a few times.

“Yes?” Minho asked, and Jonghyun brought his hand up to Minho’s hair, his fingers slipping into it.

“C-can I ask you something?” Jonghyun asked, his voice sounding small, and Minho watched insecurity flash across his boyfriends face. Minho kissed Jonghyun’s cheek.

“Of course.” Minho whispered. Jonghyun pressed his face against Minho’s chest.

“Don’t laugh, ok?” Jonghyun pleaded, and Minho looked down at him. He was starting to get really worried. What was Jonghyun going to ask?

“I won’t. What’s on your mind?” Minho prodded, and Jonghyun spoke so quickly and quietly, Minho had no idea what he said. “Run that by me again?”

“I...” Jonghyun sighed, slowly pulling back from Minho to look up at him. “I asked...if you think I’m good looking.”

“Oh.” Minho said, his eyes widening in surprise. Jonghyun shifted his gaze to somewhere below Minho’s chin.

“It’s just...when we first met, I was so skinny. You guys were always so worried about it, and telling me I needed to gain weight. I knew it didn’t look good to be that skinny anyway, and it wasn’t good for me, so I gained all the weight, and I worked out...and...” Jonghyun swallowed hard. He didn’t even know why this mattered to him so much. “Do I look better now? I-I mean...am I...more attractive to you?”

“Jonghyun.” Minho said, and Jonghyun flinched slightly. Minho reached down, grasping Jonghyun’s jaw and lifting his head to they were eye to eye. “I always thought you were good looking. When you were skinny, I was worried about your health, but you were still attractive to me. I don’t like you better now just because you got healthier. I always liked you because of who you are. I love you. I’m happier that you’re healthy, and...yes, I do like your cheeks being fuller, and your body having substance to it, but you’ve always been and always will be attractive to me.”

“Oh.” Jonghyun said. He leaned up quickly, catching Minho’s lips for a second, then pulling back to cuddle against Minho. “You’re attractive too, to me.”

“Good.” Minho said, petting Jonghyun’s hair. “Now, can we go to sleep?”

Jonghyun rolled his eyes and pressed himself against Minho again, not bothering to answer.