Chapter 21

Hectic and tired… only these two words could perfectly describe the situation he is in right at this moment. The sounds of papers shuffling against each other getting on his nerves by time, he let out a frustrated groans as he ruffles his own hair, scratching his imaginary itching scalp while reading the documents line by line.

Due to his emotional rollercoaster in the past few weeks when things haven’t settled between him and Jaejoong, he wasn’t aware of the stacks of documents on his desk. After he started getting a grip of himself, he realized there are loads of things demands for his attention starts calling for him on his working desk.

And thanks to the piling works; he hadn’t meet with his beloved for five consecutive days.  The phone suddenly rings waking him up from his wandering thoughts “Mr. Jung, someone wants to meet you.” His secretary voice echoed in his office room. “I thought that I don’t have appointment with anyone till 3.p.m.” Yunho frowns.

“Ehmm…” his secretary clears , “It’s Miss Kim Hyulrin, sir. She wants to meet you.” She whispered.

“Let her in…” Yunho briefly gives his permission.

Sounds of heels knocking against the marble making Yunho’s heart race, thousand of thoughts running in his mind, stimulating how he will answers to her questions. His door opened in a harsh way, giving him the hint to Hyulrin’s mood at the moment.

“Anything that you want to talks about?” Yunho raised his eyebrows waiting for her burst.

The young lady in her hot pink dress threw an envelope onto his face. She puffed, trying to control her anger until she gets an explanation from Yunho. He raised his eyebrows again, looking at her quizzically.

“Open it.”

He complied with her orders, slowly taking the contents of the envelope out and spread it on his desk.

“What are these?” Hyulrin referred to the pictures laid out in front of them.

“It’s like what you see in the picture.” Yunho calmly replied but didn’t explain further, the pictures already give thousand of messages; clearer and better than his words.

“I want to hear it from you. Who is he?” She demands.

Yunho sighed. He was trying to be nice with her, telling her nothing works between them. But she’s stubborn, wanting to be hurt by her own action.

“He is my lover. We have been officially in relationship since month and a half.”

“You cheated on me?” Hyulrin sounded hurting while narrowing her eyes in disbelieves.

“No... I didn’t because we never date anyway. We’re just friends, nothing more than that. Hyulrin, I beginning to get tired of these repetitions, I had lost count how many times I’ve explained to you how things never work between us. If you’re asking why I couldn’t accept your love or why didn’t I love you back, I can’t. It’s a very complicated matter that even I hardly could describe it with words. When I met him for the first time, I feel sparks. His face embedded in my mind so deep that I immediately recognized him when we met again. It’s a wonderful feeling that I want you to feel too. What you feel from me… it’s not love, it’s just a form of admiration. There is someone out there that will love you back like you did. And it’s clear to me that I’m not the person. Please Hyulrin, let us not continue to suffer like this…” Yunho begs yet still hoping that she will understand their situation.

Tears pouring from her eyes staining her pale cheek which Yunho choose to ignore for the better, he can’t let her have another misconception because of his kindness.

“You’re a cruel man,” she sobbed.

“I’m sorry. It’s for the better… for both of us… put the blame on me if it will make you feel better.”

Hyulrin didn’t further question him. She ran out of the office while crying. Yunho pinch his temple thinking that the scene will be a hot gossip among his employee. He did felt sorry for Hyulrin because of his harsh treatments towards her. But if it’s the only way to make she understand and accept Yunho’s real feeling and starts to wake up from her imaginary world, he is willing to be the bad guy.

His concentrates back on his work when the telecom beeps again. He pushed the answer button “Yes?” he sounded slightly annoyed. “Mr. Jung, you have another company. He said that he is a friend.”

“Friend?” the door was opened without waiting for him to give permission. “Forgot about me you heartless dude?”

“Kyuhyun?” Yunho surprised by his presence. “I saw that… since when you became the bad guy?” he pointed to the back referring Hyulrin that just leaved the room.

“It’s complicated and I don’t want to mention that again… come in take your seat…” he welcomed his old friend. “Ah, Min-ah-sshi, it’s okay he is a friend of mine.” He dismissed his secretary. The lady bowed and leaves the room respecting her boss privacy.

“Two years since we last met and when I went to pay a visit, you and Sungmin flown away to Africa for humanitarian activity.” Yunho pushed his paper away. “So how’s Africa?” he sandwiched his hand and place it on the table.

“Memorable… mixed feelings… I will go there soon again, it’s a three year volunteer work but I took a few days holiday because I found something belongs to you among my luggage. I wanted to post it but it’s too dangerous for something so valuable to travel through mail.” Kyuhyun shoved a small brown envelope in front of him.

“What is this?” he raised his eyebrows, throwing a quizzical look at the man sitting across his table.

“Open it…” Kyuhyun urged.

“Today I got two mystery looking brown envelope, one makes me become the bad guy… what this one would make me into?” he hesitantly opens the envelope. Surprisingly this time, he received a silver locket that looked familiar… strangely familiar. His lips opened and closed and then he bit his lips as if contemplating. Seeing his friend bewildered expression, Kyuhyun decides to speak first.

“One of the paramedics gave it to me two years ago after your accident. They said you dropped this. I forgot about it since I was busy with the humanitarian activity but few days ago, I found it again and I feel it’s something important for you.” said Kyuhyun, his voice loses its playful tone.

Yunho’s hand traced the familiar silver cravings when a flashbacks of someone giggling turning facing him, they shares hugs and kisses but the image of the person quite blurry to him. The locket accidentally opened revealing the contents.

“A picture? Of who? Me?” Yunho puzzled, he gazed to Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun silently nods.

“It was visible that time, you stood next to a beauty. Looking so happy next to each other, the picture was soaked in blood for quite some time, I’m not sure if you could see it or not…” His eyes focused on the picture and shrugs.

Half of the picture was covered by dried blood, probably his, only his picture visible.  “Did you know someone who can fix this? Can it be saved?” Yunho narrowed his eyes. He needs to know what happened when he lost his memory, the meaning behind the silver locket and the gold ring also what does that person means in his life.

“I know someone, our hoobae… but I heard from Kangin. Are you sure that you’re doing the right thing? What about him?” Kyuhyun didn’t refer to whom clearly but deep in Yunho’s heart he knows who Kyuhyun is referring.

Guilt consumed him the moment Kyuhyun mentioned about Jaejoong. “It’s okay, I’ll talk with him. I’m sure he would understand.” Yunho sounded slightly unasserted to Kyuhyun.

“You said that, I talked to him. All you need to do is to contact and prepare yourself. This is his contact number. I thought that you might need it.” He shoved a business card to Yunho. “I need to go now. Sungmin is waiting for me at the lobby probably already complaining. We are visiting his family in Australia so need to catch our flight,” said Kyuhyun.

“Already? But you just arrived here; I don’t even have the chance to catch up with you,” said Yunho slightly surprised.

“We can do the catch up after I settle my activity there. Take the time and finish your problem and don’t bug me with it when I’m back to South Korea.” said Kyuhyun warningly.

Yunho smiles, “I will… and thanks for coming all the way to send this.” Yunho thanked his friend. The other winked and waved at him before stepping out of the door.

Yunho laid himself on his chair, contemplating. This should have come sooner before he started his relationship with Jaejoong. He is not blaming his friend for coming too slow making him trapped in complicated situation like now. But what if he’s been in a relationship with the person in the picture? What should he do? To confront Jaejoong? To confront that person? What should he say to both of them? I’ll take my responsibility? Saying that might be easy but could he take the responsibility? Would he be able to? Make both of them happy?

He can’t simply say “Sorry I can’t remember you”. It would hurt the other if they were madly in love within that eight months period. And now he’s back after two years and said that “I’m sorry, I’m couldn’t love you as much as I was before because I lost my memory.” Thousands of thought running in his mind, stimulations by stimulations of the solvent plays like video tapes. His work was long forgotten when he realized it’s already 6.30.p.m, most of his employee already left the building to return to their home.

He took a deep breath and tidied his table a bit before leaving his office with complicated feelings swelling up in his heart.

o-o-o

The music blasting in the air while customers heating the dance floor, swaying their hip along the tune, some enjoying themselves celebrating and releasing their tensions but some drowning themselves in alcohol trying to forget about their tough life while another portion of people spending their time flirting with each other. Smells of sweats, cigarettes and alcohol mixed in the air while a lady in her hot pink dress drowning her-self in alcohol. Glass by glass she gulps down everything within seconds even the bartenders starts to whisper among themselves how they are going to handle her.

“Another!” Hyulrin smashed the glass onto the counter. The serving bartender reluctantly fills her cup. “Miss, you drink too much.” He gathered his guts to tell her.

Hyulrin leveled her gaze to him. “Who are you to tell me what to do!? Huh?” She obviously offended by his action. The bartender hid his gaze feared that she will cost him his job. “I’m sorry…” he bowed numerous times.

The scene happens hours ago replayed in her mind, causing her lips to quivered, eyes threatening to spill the contents.

Flashback.

She set her feet out of the building, running away from the reality that she had kept long behind her mind. She could sense Yunho’s reluctance to be with her. In every picture, she discovers Yunho’s new expression, expressions that he never showed when they were together; expressions that Yunho shows only when he is with that person.

“Kim Jaejoong…” she reads a file containing information about Jaejoong provided by her private investigator including a picture of Jaejoong and his son. She bits her lips until she taste blood. Closing the file harshly, she threw it to her back seat then rams her head against the steering, crying in agony and frustrations. She hits the steering numerous times, expressing her anger.

“I will make you pay for this!” She expressed her deep hatred. Revenge is all she wants now. Nobody could have happiness if she couldn’t get one. She ignites the engine and leaves the building in hurry while setting plans in her mind with vengeful eyes.

Flashback ends.

“I will make both of you feel my pain.” She slammed the emptied glass.

“What!?” voice of owner of the mansion echoed through the hallway, surprising his passing secretary. “She ran out from the hospital? How? When?” the man paused for a while listening to the explanation from the other end of the phone line. He groaned and pinched on his temple, looked slightly distressed.

“I try to look for her and contact her friends if any of them saw or met her. But please check the hospital thoroughly, if she’s hiding somewhere near please informs me.” HongDo’s solemn voice echoed. A loud sigh escaped from the old man right after he placed the phone back on its place. His secretary silently placed a cup of milk tea in front of him as if knowing what he need the most right now.

The young man silently hugs on the tray. “Thank you, Soohan. I wished that my daughter could be an understanding person as you do, even just a little understanding that would mean a lot for me.” HongDo paused for a while before asking what playing in his mind. “Soohan-ah, did you think that I spoilt her too much?” he asks the young man. Was he wrong to spoil her too much? Fulfilling every single of her wishes until she feels that it’s normal to have everything in her way?

The young man shook his head. “She’s your only daughter, it’s normal for a father to wish for her happiness especially since her mother couldn’t give her share of love.”

HongDo silent, he nods and let Soohan leaves the room. He turns the leather chair around facing the panorama from his office. “Sooyoung-ah I’m sorry for unable to give you happiness before you go. I deserve the miseries happening now, but at least help and protect Hyulrin, she’s your daughter too… don’t let her take the same path as you too, suicide won’t solve anything… please…” he begs in his remorse filled heart. 

Suddenly he heard some noises downstairs then followed by a knock on his door. “Yes, come in.” he gives his permission. “Master!  Young lady Hyulrin she’s…” head of the maid were unable to finish her words when HongDo hurriedly went out of his office and strides down the stair at the mention of his daughter’s name.

The moment he laid his eyes on the entrance, his heart shattered into million pieces, his daughter his precious child completely blasted while mumbling incoherent words. Smells of alcohol stung his nose but that didn’t stop him from approaching his daughter.

“Dear…” HongDo carefully take his daughter into his arm. Hyulrin groaned and drifted into deep sleep. “Help me to take her into her room.” He ordered the servants. “And contact the hospital and inform them that she’s home.” HongDo continues.

o-o-o

Jaejoong paused and stole a few glances to the person opposite of his table, which quite immersed in chasing his meatballs around the plate instead of eating it. Yunho have been acting weird since they met again couple days ago. He seems not being himself sometimes a few silent sigh accidentally escaped from his mouth. Jaejoong asked him a few times if there’s something bothering him but the other always avoiding himself from answering his questions.

Jaejoong placed his cutleries on the side of his plate. He took the napkin, wipes his lips and took a gulp of his watermelon juice while eyes fixed on Yunho. Seeing the other not giving any response sooner or later, he decided to speak.

“Yunho-ah, is there something bothering you?” He places his hand above Yunho’s. Yunho slightly taken aback, he briefly smiles, hands taking Jaejoong’s in his.

“I’m okay… too busy recently, I guess I didn’t have enough rest,” he laid his fork to the side.

“Yunho-ah, if there’s something please tell me, I maybe couldn’t help but I could listen if you need a listener. I promise not to make any comments,” he promised.

“I will tell you when the time comes... after I have everything sorted out,” said Yunho.

Jaejoong nods and continues savoring the food in his plate. Yunho took a bite when something cross in his mind.

“Ermm… what will you do? Let say you had an accident and lost your memory, lived with someone for some time, having a relationship with that someone then you had an accident again, losing your memory again. After a period, someone tells you that you have somebody during that period and you have left for quite long period.” Yunho questioned.

Jaejoong froze, his appetite immediately thrown out of the window. His expression hardened a bit while nervously gulping the juice to cover his nervousness. “Why did you ask?” said Jaejoong. Yunho shrugs.

Jaejoong contemplates for a while. Did Yunho remembered about something? Should he just state the truth about them? Will it not make him confuse later? He thought that they should settle a bit before Jaejoong telling him. By that time, Yunho wouldn’t be so surprised and could slowly absorb the fact. But what if Yunho rushed it by now? Looking for him? It would be harder for him to opens his mouth.

Should he let Yunho go to look for him and Yoonmin or should he just tell him the truth? Reveals that they’re the one he is looking for.

Yunho slightly tilts his head, he could see thought running in Jaejoong’s mind. He could feel that sometimes Jaejoong doing a load of spacing. Staring at him while thoughts running in his head. He feels as if Jaejoong were hiding something from him which he couldn’t grasped on.

“Jaejoongie?” Yunho shook Jaejoong out from his thoughts.

“What was the question again?” Jaejoong bats his eyelashes, looking slightly awaked.

“Never mind… let’s finish our food.” Yunho continues digging into his plate. Hesitantly but Jaejoong complied anyway. Maybe he should talk to Changmin about this.

“Tell him,” two words were slapped onto his face after he talked to Changmin. The other was listening intently at first when it’s time for him to talk. Jaejoong straightly get that.

“B-but how?” Jaejoong stuttered.

Changmin sighed and faced the other. “Tell him, 'hey dude, you know what? I’m your spouse and we have a sweet and smart kid named Yoonmin'. How’s that sound?” Changmin’s lips twisted in mischief.

“Okay, fine… I know I’m stupid to ask about your opinion.” Jaejoong raised both hands up, surrendered while crashing his body onto his soft bed.

“What!? There’s nothing wrong with my idea in fact, you should have done it a long time ago not letting it drag until today.” Changmin laid sideway while one hand supporting his head by Jaejoong’s side.

“Yeah… I know… but I don’t know how to start. I can’t do like what you suggested, Yunho will think that I’m losing my mind… talking about ruined first image.”

“No, I don’t think so. He might straightly jump on you to compensate the two years time he didn’t touch you.” Changmin remarked.

“Minnie!” Jaejoong pulls himself up and slaps on Changmin’s upper arm. “Yunho is not a ert like you. He will not take me at random places outside of the house.” Jaejoong immediately covers his lose mouth when sly grins emerged on Changmin’s face.

“Oh~ so both of you did done something naughty outside the bed.” said Changmin nods his head several times while the grin still sticking on.

“Uhh~… maybe two or three times at the kitchen, more than five times in tubs, the rest in bed… until you know… Yoonmin…” Jaejoong mumbled.

“Okay! Stop! I don’t want to know the details.” Changmin stops him. “But seriously, I think it’s better to tell the truth than letting him discover it by himself. He will feel much painful than knowing it from you, the one that he left.”

Jaejoong nods, knowing the other have his point. “Better die trying than regretting…” But still how is he going to tell Yunho without the other mad at him for hiding such big matter? How Yunho possibly react to the news? Would he be happy? And at last Jaejoong got what he wants all this long? Getting his family together again?

A sigh escaped from the red plump lips, Jaejoong laid his head on Changmin’s shoulder. “I wish that my relationship with Yunho wasn’t this complicated…”

“Staying at such rural area, you won’t heal from your trauma and walk out from that place if you didn’t involve yourself in such complicated relationships. Somehow I’m grateful to Yunho for making you talk once again and giving Yoonmin to you.” said Changmin while laying his head on the other.

“Mmm…me too…” Jaejoong whispered softly.

**********To Be Continued**********

A/N: Thousand years since my last update...here's the latest and beta-ed version. Sorry for taking too much time letting everyone waiting...Life, everyone know how hard it is...Thanks to new subcribers for willing to subscribe my humble story...not much of it but I try my best. Please comment because I want to know how's the flow of story. My heart says something need to move on in this story.