Siwon clasped Hyoyeon’s hand tightly as they stood stage left waiting for their cue to go on to the set. Her hand was cold and clammy against his but he didn't seem to mind, after all they were supposed to be the picture of love triumphing against the odds, the least they could do was this small amount of skinship.

How had things got to this stage? He wondered. When had things gone so wrong? He suppressed a sigh. It all started and ended with him. After all this farce of a relationship was in play to save his image, the hate she was getting from the fans and the hurt she was going through were all rooted in that. But there was one thing he wasn’t to blame for. Despite how it seemed he had not used her. The PR tactic had just happened to coincide with his own desire to win her back. It was a terrible coincidence. He’d actually mused that it was fate’s way of repaying him for ruining his chances with her the first time.

‘No do overs,’ the universe seemed to be saying.

It was dark where they stood and their mics and receivers had already been set and only a few staff members were working near them. And he felt that this might be the only time he could tell her that what he had happened had been real, sincere and because he had wanted it to happen not because he’d been instructed to.

 “Hyoyeon,” he whispered.

She didn’t reply but she inclined her head slightly in his direction.

“You have to believe me...I didn’t know Sunwoo would send that reporter after us. I didn’t even know they’d set this plan in motion,” she didn’t reply, “Hyoyeon?”

She sighed, “It doesn’t matter now does it? Let’s just get this over and done with.”

He felt his body tense at the cold disinterest in her voice, “It does matter!”

His loud exclamation drew the attention of a member of staff who was carrying some documents and he cast a long look at them before continuing on.

“It does matter Hyo,” he lowered his voice and squeezed her hand, she met his gaze, “You matter… we matter.”

Hyoyeon only looked at him, the eyes were the windows to the soul and he had nothing to hide. He hoped she could see that.

But when it seemed as though she might reply Siwon felt a tap on his shoulder. A man he recognized as the set director motioned for them to get ready to walk on stage in five seconds.

“Let’s talk after the show, please… don’t run away,” he said as they made their way onto the set where the audience was welcoming them with applause and cheering.

The presenters of the show were two of the best in Korea, Yoo Jaeseok and Kim Wonhee and from the start they made the atmosphere on the show fun and easy going. Although most of the attention was turned to them despite the presence of 4 other guests, Hyoyeon and Siwon both felt immediately at ease as soon as they took their seats.

After introductions the Q&A session started. Hyoyeon let Siwon answer most of the questions, following his lead as instructed.

“When did you realise you had feelings for each other?” Wonhee asked.

“Well, it’s not very romantic,” there were a few murmurs of disbelief from some of the audience members, Siwon smiled, “It happened while we were in China. We were a little tired from sitting in the dorm studying hard…or should I say trying hard to study, so I suggested that we should go out for a few hours to recharge ourselves, so after we decided what we wanted to do, she said that our plan sounded like we were going out on a date, I and she blushed, and for some reason, at that moment, I was just struck by how…” Siwon turned to face her, “By how beautiful she looked. And I think at that point is when I realised I liked her as more than a friend.”

 A few catcalls rose from the audience. The story had gone down well.

“Our Hyoyeon has turned completely red, now,” Jaeseok laughed.

“She’s blushing for the both of us,” Siwon chuckled running his hand through his hair self consciously, “That’s a story I haven’t told anyone…”

“Oh really?” Wonhee exclaimed.

“Yes, I don’t even think Hyoyeon knew what had been going on in my heart at the time. She probably thought ‘oh! this oppa is just teasing.’”

“Ah but you already really liked her?” Jaeseok asked.

Siwon nodded. The audience ooh-ed and ah-ed at this revelation.

“Hyoyeon, did you like Siwon at the time? Or did your feelings grow from there?” Wonhee asked.

“Ah…” Hyoyeon paused.

The answer was easy, she’d liked him from much earlier on, but could she say that? To this person that she wasn’t really sure about anymore, could she admit that? And in front of all these people?

She wanted to lie but instead the truth tumbled out, “Honestly, I liked him from earlier on.”

A hum ran through the audience.

“Ah I see, so it was an unrequited love at first?” Jaeseok asked.

Hyoyeon nodded.

“You know Siwon looks a little surprised at this news…you didn’t know Siwon?”

“I had an idea…” Siwon trailed off, a sheepish grin on his face.

Wonhee laughed, “Now Hyoyeon looks surprised,”

Everyone laughed and Hyoyeon could feel most of the cameras focus on her.

“I am a little surprised,” she replied, “I’m thinking ‘this cold oppa knew my feelings but didn’t say anything?’”

There was more laughter.

One of the guests chimed in, “You know even if you have an idea someone has feelings for you it feels strange to come out and ask ‘hey, do you like me?’”

The audience murmured in agreement.

“How long have you two been together?”

“That’s hard to say,” Siwon laughed. “There were a few rough patches,” he said.

'More like one long rough patch,' Hyoyeon thought.

“Yes, maintaining a relationship like yours especially in secret would be difficult, wouldn’t it?” Jaeseok intoned.

“But all in all I’ve liked Hyoyeon for seven years,”

The audience went wild.

“Seven years!” Wonhee exclaimed echoing the surprise of everyone on set.

Hyoyeon caught sight of her expression on one of the monitors, she seemed as surprised as everyone else. How couldn’t she? For the past few years watching Siwon go about his daily life with all the unrestrained joy of a two year old in a toy store, he’d seemed far from hung up over her. He’d had a few relationships here and there, all with tall slender pale skinned beauties. Hadn’t one of her group mates been one of his past paramours?

Sooyoung and Siwon had become close a couple of years earlier. They attended the same church, had numerous friends in common and shared common interests, the news that they were dating had more hurt than surprised her. It had been so very hard for her to smile as she watched Sooyoung get ready for her dates with him. Even now, a year later she still felt bad for silently celebrating their break up.

 Her heart was thumping hard in her chest. A small voice reminded her where they were. In a studio, on a TV show…this wasn’t real. His answer wasn’t real.

He squeezed her hand and she realised at that moment that her hand wasn’t cold and clammy anymore and his warm, firm but gentle grip was annoyingly reassuring. With that simple gesture of encouragement another seed of doubt was planted. She was drawn out of her thoughts when Jaeseok directed a question at her.

“Hyoyeon it’s the same for you, right?”

“Well…like Siwon said there were some rough patches, I think there were times I cursed him a little,” Hyoyeon knew that wasn’t the answer she was supposed to give and she could picture Sunwoo gritting his teeth backstage.

Everyone laughed.

“As usual Hyoyeon’s replies are one of a kind,” Jaeseok said, “What could Siwon have done to make you want to curse him?”

“I’m sure all his fans are very curious. I know I am,” Wonhee piped in.

“I’m curious too,” Siwon said drawing more laughter from the audience.

Hyoyeon paused pretending to think deeply about whether or not she wanted to answer then smiled, “I don’t want to spoil Siwon’s reputation.”

She heard a few calls from the audience urging her to answer.

“You’re all curious?” she asked.

The response was unanimous.

Hyoyeon paused, not to be dramatic, but as she tried to sort through the (embarrassingly) numerous times she had found herself disappointed in Siwon over the past years. His past relationships had cut her deep but she couldn’t really mention them.

“Well this happened some time ago, I think it’s the first time I felt disappointed in him.”

“Hyoyeon sounds like she’s suffered a lot over the years,” Jaeseok feigned a disapproving look much to the amusement of the audience.

“This happened about a month after we debuted, so it was around Chuseok. We were still doing promotions at the time so we didn’t get to visit our homes until much later. At the time, of course, we really wanted to see our families but because my birthday is in late September I had really hoped to be able to go back home and celebrate with my family.”

Wonhee nodded, “I feel like I know where this is headed…”

“Well, you know even when you have a disagreement with a close friend you still secretly want them to wish you well on your birthday, right?” Hyoyeon continued.

“That’s right,” Jaesoek agreed.

“Now it so happened that Siwon and I met each other in the company lobby on my birthday,” Hyoyeon paused, “And you know I was feeling a little sad that I hadn’t been able to go home, so when I saw him I thought ‘ah, I really want to receive a greeting from this person.’”

There was a collective sigh of understanding from everyone.

Feeling she’d made the mood a bit too serious and feeling a bit embarrassed by the confession, Hyoyeon then added in a deeply accented ajhumma tone, “But this bad guy didn’t even greet me!” and playfully smacked Siwon’s shoulder.

Everyone on set burst laughing.

“Siwon, you’re killing the hopes of your female fans. How could you not wish Hyoyeon happy birthday?” Jaeseok playfully chided.

Siwon nodded and although the atmosphere had turned light his tone was serious, “You know many people assume I’m a certain way because of how I portray myself in public. But honestly, I think I am a bit of a bad guy,” he paused, “I don’t know how she puts up with me but I thank God that she does.”

There was a refrain of ‘aws’ from the crowd.

“I think the question everyone is wondering though is, why did you decided to come out publicly with the relationship?” Wonhee asked.

Siwon sighed, “The article that came out in Hot Scandal…”

“Ah… but you know people often deny those reports, but you guys decided to just come out with it?”

“We thought with the kinds of pictures that were published, it would cause even more problems if we lied about our actual relationship,”

One of the other guests spoke up at this point, “So you would have kept it a secret if the article hadn’t come out?”

The question had come right out of left field and for a moment he couldn’t think of a proper response. Sunwoo had said to keep their answer short and sweet. The obvious reply would be, ‘No, we would have announced it anyway.’ But honestly his intention deep down had been for him and Hyoyeon to carry on a relationship secretly. At least at first.

But he’d paused too long; it was too late to answer as he had been instructed. He’d have to say what he really felt.

“I’ll probably get into trouble but if I’m honest, yes…I think I would have wanted to keep our relationship a secret.”

“Why?” the same guest asked.

 “There’s many reasons,” he answered evasively, “Company rules that we would have been breaking…”

A different guest piped in, “Ay! Is that really something to worry about when you’re talking about the person you’ve loved for seven years?”

Siwon glanced plaintively at Jaeseok and Wonhee but neither seemed prepared to jump in and save him from answering the question.

“Like I said there are other reasons…” Siwon said, “Reasons I can’t say I feel confident discussing here.” he hoped his attempt at nonchalance had paid off.

It did. But only long enough for another difficult question to be lobbed at him.

“Isn’t it about popularity? The idols who announce their relationships always seem to lose fans…”

“Uh…i-it’s not…it’s-”

Siwon’s stammering voice was drowned out as the audience members began to actually talk amongst themselves at this point. There seemed to be a general consensus amongst them that it had been a question of popularity. How pretentious the entire idea made him seem, claiming he’d liked her for seven years and yet he couldn’t risk his fame for her? He wasn’t sure if the feeling that they were all judging him was because of his own conscience prickling or because they were actually judging him.

At this point Jaeseok jumped in and steered the conversation expertly in another direction. For a time they were granted a reprieve as Jaeseok and Wonhee drew most of the attention of the other guests.

Siwon felt Hyoyeon’s fingers intertwine with his. The meaning of the gesture was unmistakeable. He looked at her to find her smiling encouragingly at him, a small sweet smile that stirred up a dizzying rush of nostalgia in him and more than that hope. An hour before she’d seemed as though she couldn’t even stand to be in the same room with him and now her eyes carried such sincere warmth as she looked at him that he allowed himself to hope that he had managed to at least break through one of the walls she’d put up against him.

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As the show drew to an end, all the guests were asked to make a final comment. Siwon was asked to go first. However, instead of facing the show’s MCs he turned directly toward the main camera.

“Hello to my dearest fans. Thank you for all the support you’ve shown me until now. I cannot begin to express how thankful I am to have all of you,” Siwon cleared his throat, “ I know the news came out in an unexpected way but this girl, this beautiful girl beside me is very important to me. But due to certain people, over the past few weeks things have been very hard for her. From now on I hope that you can show her as much love as you’ve shown me over the years and give us all your support. Thank you,” he raised Hyoyeon’s hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand.

It took nearly ten minutes to get the audience to quiet down after Siwon finished and even then as the other guests made their final comments, both Hyoyeon and Siwon could feel the eyes of the entire audience fixed on them.

_{I took a few liberties with the format of Come to Play. I'm not sure if its shot in front of a live studio audience but I thought it would helpt to add an audience in to show their}

_{reactions to Hyoyeon and Siwon as they answered questions in the interview.}