The white, bright light above him blinded him, so he had to squint his already small eyes until his pupils adjusted to it. He was lying on the hospital bed again and even though he just woke up, the fatigue that he was experiencing restrained him from getting up.

 

"Hyung! He's awake!"

 

Himchan heard some shuffling noises and then a couple of shadows hovered above him. He tried making out the faces and soon realised it was no other than Yongguk and Zelo.

 

"Himchan! Are you ok?" Yongguk asked as he helped his friend sit up from his bed. Himchan groaned at the pain throbbing in his head and everything around him started spinning for a while; because of that he dropped his head back onto the pillow and waited for the dizziness to wear out.

 

"Hyung! We found you in Jieun's room and you were already passed out. You've been sleeping for 6 hours" Zelo explained even though Himchan didn't ask for an explanation; and he had been sleeping for 6 hours?

 

He covered his eyes with his forearm, panting hard trying to take in as much oxygen as he could. He remembered his dream clearly and he knew that it wasn't just a dream. It was real. It was a part of his memories.

 

"I saw her" he said in a heavy and tired voice.

 

Yongguk and Zelo shared glances and looked back at Himchan with his arm still covering his face.

 

"Saw who?" Yongguk asked, but then he figured out who Himchan was talking about, "Jieun?"

 

Himchan finally pulled his arm away from his face and placed his hands on his chest, feeling his heart beat that was still accelerating from the car crash in his dreams. He stared at the ceiling before talking again.

 

"I remember now. I remember it clearly" he spoke and turned his face to the two guys standing at the edge of his bed, "I made this happen didn't I?"

 

Neither of them said a word. Zelo looked away and bit his lip forcing himself not to say anything. Deep inside, a part of him blamed Himchan for what happened to Jieun, but then again he didn't have the heart to take it out all on Himchan, also considering that he was in a situation like this.

 

"It was an accident. It wasn't your fault" Yongguk swallowed hard on his saliva while trying to find the right words to comfort his friend.

 

"Then whose fault was it? If I hadn't been such a jerk--If I hadn't driven so fast in the rain that night, we wouldn't end up like this, would we?" Himchan said. Yongguk stayed silent for a moment and thought for an appropriate answer but Zelo decided to break up that silence.

 

"Hyung, I'll go get you coffee and some food. I'm sure you're hungry right now" Zelo said as he pushed himself away from the edge of the bed. Himchan smiled weakly at him and nodded.

 

When Zelo left the room, Yongguk and Himchan shared a few awkward glances with each other. Himchan was still expecting an answer from Yongguk but instead, Yongguk cleared his throat and grabbed his coat hanging on the chair that he slept on a while ago.

 

"Zelo will come back soon and he'll bring you your food. And according to the doctor, you'll be discharged from here tomorrow. I've still got work to go to so I'll see you tomorrow." Yongguk explained thoroughly and Himchan just nodded weakly understanding his every words. Yongguk nodded back knowing that Himchan was really listening to him.

 

"I told her I loved her" Himchan muttered under his breath but it was loud enough for Yongguk to hear. "Before we crashed, I finally told her that I loved her for the first time. I'm not even sure if she heard me" Himchan buried his face in his hands, frustrated at his detailed memories that were slowly revealing themselves one by one to haunt his mind.

 

"Will she still love me if she ever wakes up again?" he brought his face up to look at Yongguk who was standing a few feet away from his bed. 

 

"Trust me Himchan. She's just waiting for you to regain your memories of her. Jieun will wake up" Yongguk assured him. Although there was a small chance, his eyes glinted with hope that Jieun would one day wake up from her coma and it did help Himchan regain a little of his fighting spirit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~+*+*+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Himchan waited for Zelo, but the nurse arrived first with a tray of hospital food. The nurse smiled at him, and he was certain that it wasn't at all genuine. He grimaced as the nurse left the room after placing the food on his table. Even though he hadn't even touched it yet, he knew how bad it would taste by the looks of it. Even the tea in the see-through glass cup looked more like pee from a diabetic patient.

 

He pulled away the sheets and jumped off the bed and hissed as his bare feet touched the cold tiled floor of the hospital. He quickly put on his slippers and slowly made his way to the hallway, hoping to find a very inhuman-like tall kid somewhere in the corridors of the hospital.

 

Himchan let out a sigh when there was no sight of Zelo at all. He stepped out of his room anyway, and as if it was a natural reaction, he found himself walking his way to Jieun's room again. He knew that he just had to see her again. Ever since he woke up and had that dream, he always had this urge to go back to her and never leave her side, because for now, that was the least he could do.

 

Again, as he entered her room, the scent of lavender filled his senses.

 

'Lavender can calm your nerves' Himchan remembered her saying; and only now he started believing her because instead of another series of painful and throbbing headache, the scent actually made him feel calm and relaxed.

 

Himchan stepped closer to the side of her bed and watched Jieun's chest move up and down really slowly. The sounds of the beeping machines around her filled the silence that came along with her deep breathing. He turned his head to notice the vase filled with lavender flowers on top of the bedside table and realised that the scent came from there.

 

He reached his hand out, touching the flowers gently, but as gentle as he was, a few petals fell from its withering stalk.

 

"Himchan?"

 

Surprised by the very familiar voice, he turned around to see Jieun, but an older version somewhere in her 40's, standing right at the end of the bed. He didn't hear her coming in, so he didn't notice her in the first place. Himchan blinked for a few seconds and then stared at Jieuns mother. Despite the age, she still looked young and it was clear to where Jieun had gotten her beautiful features from.

 

It hurt Himchan to see her smile in front of him. How could she smile when the person who had hurt her daughter and also resulting her to end up in a coma is standing right in front of her? Himchan knew that if she resented him and had no thoughts of forgiving him for what he did, he understood her clearly.

 

"O-omonim" he called out to her. He wanted to say something to her, to apologise, but he knew that just by apologising it wouldn't help her get her daughter back. Unexpectedly, she came towards Himchan and pulled him into a hug. Shocked by her actions, he froze, uncertain of how to react. He heard her sniffle so he could tell that she was crying. 

 

After a gentle squeeze, she pulled herself away from him and his cheek as if he was her own child.

 

"You're finally awake again" she sniffled again, "I heard from Yongguk that you were hospitalized again because you out"

 

Himchan could only nod in shame. Other than worrying about Jieun, she even worried about him. And so he thought, this was what a true mother was really like. Himchan never knew how it really felt since his mother decided to kill herself when he was younger.

 

"You do...remember me, don't you?" she asked. Himchan nodded with a rather weak smile. "You remember Jieun too?" she asked again and when he nodded again, she gasped and palmed her wide open mouth. Jieun's mother started to tear again, but it was tears of happiness to her. She pulled Himchan in for another hug and he couldn't help but just to relax in her motherly embrace and hold onto her as tight she did.

 

"What is he doing here?" A gruff and stern voice boomed through the room.

 

When they pulled away from each other, Himchan met eyes with him. And this time for sure, Himchan knew that she got her eyes from her father. However, the eyes that were staring back at Himchan weren't at all friendly or loving. It wasn't filled with hate or resentment or disgust either, as Himchan thought it would be, but instead, it was filled with disappointment, something that made Himchan feel even guiltier than anything else in the world.

 

"I asked you what are you doing here!" he said louder which caused Himchan to jump a little. 

 

Himchan dropped his knees to the floor and hung his head. He gulped hard before he could find the courage to call out to him.

 

"Abeonim...”

 

"Don't you ever call me that! You are no one to me! You mean nothing to my daughter!" he stomped up to the kneeling guy and pushed his head making Himchan fall over, but he pulled himself back up into his kneeling position. The tears that threatened to fall from his eyes caused him to choke on his words so it made it even harder for him to make himself sound intimidating to Himchan.

 

Before he could hit Himchan on the head again, his wife quickly ran up to his side and protected Himchan from him.

 

"Please don't hurt him. Not in front of our child, please" she pleaded, holding back her husband’s hand to prevent him from hitting Himchan again.

 

"I can't tell you how sorry I am" Himchan started to speak, with his head still hanging low, ashamed to meet eyes with the father of his girlfriend. "I know that even if I told you how sorry I am, it will never get Jieun to wake up, so I'm not asking you to forgive me, Abeonim" he said. He gripped on tighter to his pants after every word he managed to say.

 

"It was my mistake in the first place. I was stupid. I know you hate me--"

 

"I don't hate you" Himchan heard him say. He wasn't sure whether what he heard was real, so he slowly lifted his head to finally meet his eyes again. They were already wet from the tears that rolled down his tired and stubby face. "I never hated you Himchan" Jieun's father admitted. Himchan's eyes widened hearing the confession.

 

"I knew by the way she smiled after every time she talked about you. Or the way her face brightened after every time someone mentioned your name. She was so beautiful when she looked happy, and that was only because she loved you too much. I only hated you because you were taking her away from me." he said. His wife, who stood there beside him, wiped her own tears as she listened to his story.

 

"I never knew" Himchan said softly. Like a dagger stabbing deep into his heart, every word that came out from Jieun's fathers mouth hurt. How could he not feel guilty when all he ever did was neglect and act cold towards Jieun. Despite him treating her so horribly, she still offered him her sweetest smile or a bubbly laugh which now felt distant like a dream.

 

"She's the only child I have, but I'm not even sure if she really is with us anymore" her dad started to sob. Guilt ran through Himchan's veins and when he swallowed hard on his saliva, it felt like sharp shards of broken glass ripping up his throat.

 

Jieun's mother urged Himchan to stand up and so he did, but his head still hung low, ashamed to look at her father's face.

 

"Himchan ah" 

 

Himchan looked up at the old man in front of him who sighed before starting to speak again.

 

"For now, you can stay by her side" he said then looked up at Himchan who was slightly taller than him, "But we won't know for sure if she will ever wake up and even if she does, she'll decide whether or not to forgive you."

 

"I understand Abeonim" Himchan answered and pursed his lips at the thought of Jieun waking up after 3 long years and he doubts that Jieun will forgive for what he had done to her.

 

"Himchan hyung!" the door nearly slammed open. Everyone turned around to find Zelo panting hard right in front of the door and held onto his chest in hopes to calm down his pacing heartbeat, "I found you...You're ok.." he said between deep breaths.

 

"Zelo ya" Jieun's mother cooed and glided her way to Zelo to give him a pat on the back.

 

"You were missing, so I was worried. You haven't had dinner yet hyung" Zelo explained himself even though nobody asked him anything. Himchan noticed a small smile grow on Jieun's fathers face.

 

"Since Zelo is good at taking care of you, at least we know we don't have to worry about you anymore Himchan" he said and smiled widely at both of them this time.

 

"You can go Himchan. You need to at least gain some strength to look after Jieun for us later on" this time Jieun's mother spoke up.

 

Himchan nodded, obeying their words. Together with Zelo, they both bowed deeply with respect and he took one last look at the lifeless-like Jieun before leaving the room.

 

 

 

 

++++++++++*+*+*++++++++++

 

It took me two weeks to get this filler chapter done. Dear readers, I'm begging for your forgiveness, it really took some time to write this ugh. Well, not just that, I'm back to writing Jongup's story, "The Promise of A Wallflower" and it's slowly in progress. Sorry for making you guys wait and this chapter was kind of boring, it was just about how Himchan met with her parents again for the first time =.= maybe that's why it took a long time for me to write, but I promise to update faster. *bows*

I love you all <3