Jonghyun went back to the dorm without proper caution and without any food. Constantly thinking ahead of the future, constantly thinking of the possibilities if he chose one action over the other. It's not everyday you see a man shivering in 73 degree weather. As he progresses back to the dorm he's stuck with that thought daze that doesn't crack, even with a few car horns honking and shoves from passing bystanders. Cutting off all ties with you means giving up the one thing that kept him average, someone who was once a normal person. If he decided to tell you the truth, he's risking scandals and everything that keeps him an idol. How was he to decide how to untangle this sole fate?

Struggling to find the dorm key from his jacket pockets, he finally got that kick of alertness in his head. Keys twisting in the locks, he manages to get through what felt like an everlasting battle at the door. Shoes were instantly kicked off his feet as he ran straight into the door, ignoring what the rest of the SHINee members could of said to him. None of it mattered. He locked the bedroom door and grabbed a head full amount of hair in stress. Rather than becoming overdramatic, he took control of himself and relaxed on his bed. He's gonna take the time, the first time in a long time, to remember what led him to you.

Flashback:

(2 years ago; year 2008)

"Again! Again!" The choreographer exclaimed.

The music has been replayed at the dance break for another 3 times. When we showed enough perspiration for the last dance session, the choreographer put dance practice to a halt for a little break.

"Everyone grab water and gather around." He took his seat with his back a yard away from the mirrors. One by one, the rest of the members and I sat in a circle.

"Alright you probably know what the pep talk is. Tomorrow is the day that SM releases a statement about the debut of you guys, SHINee. A few days later, the MV will be released and pretty soon you guys will have your first debut show. How do you guys feel?"

I'm still trying to slow down my pumping heartbeat rate.

Huffing from hard work, Jinki stepped up and said "Years of hard work will lead to decades of success."

"How insightful Jinki! Maybe I should talk to the management about letting you become a leader."

Oh great, he always did favor Jinki hyung.

"Now that I look--" He looked around the empty studio with only him and the SHINee members. "-- If you were successful like your DBSK hyungs, Super Junior hyungs, BoA noona and SNSD noonas, you'd have to know that nothing will be the same for you right?"

We, the members, looked up at him with doubt, but sadly we gave into the fact that it's true.

"As we're practicing, Replay, it's obviously talking about love. So just try to obtain an experience relating to love, and I don't mean with your mother. It'll help with self-expression and emotions portrayed in your dancing and singing. If I were you guys, I'd maybe join a forum or meet new people secretly before debut. Ok?"

I looked around and Taemin was blinking insanely, probably from being so young. Kibum was facing the mirror doing half-effort dances leaving the rest of us to think within our own time.

Join a forum he said... meet new people secretly he said... why should I? The MV is completed, my debut date is set. I am Jonghyun! The rookie main vocalist for SHINee! and that is unnecessary.

"Alright guys! Let's get through a few more full-length practices then you can go home." I groaned with swelling gradually building up in my ankles and sweat of nervousness accumulating all my sweat glands.

Once practice finished and we made it home, Kibum walked straight into the kitchen. If he was making food, he would of said something instantly but he didn't so... The rest of us were just pondering around. I had the laptop for the week so I went on as usual and explored Naver and Melon. I felt very family-oriented this evening so I figured maybe a little SM entertainment music can help out with that. "My Little Princess" by DBSK has been popular for so long now! Especially the acapella version. With earphones secured into my ears, smooth music filled my brain.

I reflected yet again on what hyung said about 'experiences,' "Forums he said... nah I wouldn't... I'll just see if there's any leaked news about SHINee yet."

I went on Google, typed in SHINee in English, Korean, and my newly learned Chinese skills. So far it's been the same websites that have all SM trainees and idols for fansites so I have no reason to worry. But what can I do with my free time...

Well, I did promise Minseok that I'd create a Cyworld and me2day account so I'd "secretly" keep in touch with my friends even though my phone number might change a million times. Hey, I'm just happy that people like me for me even though everyday afterschool, I go straight to the studio.

I wonder how I'd make a good fake account... hell I've never made a real social account before...

Maybe I should find some people to add. 

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Honestly when I typed up Minseok I thought it was because I thought it was a good name, but wh00ps it's Xiumin of EXO-M's name. LOL But yay an update after so long~ Hope my subscribers are still with me to support me :c New or old subscribers please comment with love for me to continue~ <3