Sehun

                I must admit, he’s intriguing, this Luhan character.  The way his cute little mouth opens just the slightest bit when he needs to speak and closes abruptly when he realizes he can’t, the way his eyes flutter when he’s nervous, the way he bows his head when he’s grateful—I don’t think I’ve met anyone so genuinely innocent in my life.  And yet, when I look into those huge eyes of his, I see years of exhaustion, of hurt, of despair.

                I know what attracted me to him at first.  It wasn’t that Baekhyun and his friends were beating him to death.  It wasn’t that he was the most adorable man I’ve ever seen in my life (but he is).  It wasn’t that I was feeling particularly altruistic that day.

                As I gaze at him, I see bits and pieces of my brother.  My deaf, mute brother.  My dead brother.

Luhan

                The weeks pass, and at first Sehun checks up on me every three days, then every two.  Pretty soon, I’m with him every chance I get, even when my lip and stomach bruises have already healed, him chattering away as I scribble on my notepad in response.  I learn that he likes to dance when no one’s watching, that his parents are as wealthy and influential as mine (if not more), that his favorite word is ‘’ (as if I hadn’t already noticed) because it’s concise and to the point, that his brother is mute like I am.  I learn that his lips are even more pink and tempting close up, that he always looks stoned because he doesn’t feel the need to open his eyes to their full extent, that I am hopelessly in love with everything he does, everything he says, everything he is.  I can’t say I don’t enjoy his company, because I do, I do so very much, but I’m always unsatisfied around him, always wanting to reach out and touch his face, his hands, his hair, his everything.

                So I do.

                It happens without thought, without warning.  It’s a Saturday night—Kris is probably out partying—and we’re sitting on the floor of my room, channel surfing.  Sehun leans over me to grab a chip from the bag beside my leg, and I feel as if electricity sends a shock through my veins.  Everything I’ve been obsessing over for the past four months is right in front of me, mocking me, telling me I can’t have this glorious man.  His hair.  His eyes.  His lips.  His neck (good lord, that Adam’s apple will be the death of me).  His robust chest.  Before I can register my actions, my arms are around his toned waist, my nose against the hollow beneath his jaw.  I breathe in as much as my airways will allow me to.  He smells so.  Good.

                I feel him tense with surprise in my sudden embrace, and my cheeks burn with embarrassment.  What the hell am I doing?  But I can’t bring myself to let go of his body.  I want him so badly.  After a moment or two, he loosens up, and oh my god, he hugs me back.

                “Christ, hyung, I thought you were about to hit me for eating your chips.”  He laughs a little, and his laryngeal prominence moves, and holy , I think I need an oxygen tank.  “Love you too, man.”  I know he’s joking, which stings a bit, but I die a little inside with the explosion of sheer glee this statement gives me.  Sehun’s hands rub the small of my back lightly, and it just about takes every muscle in my body to prevent myself from kissing him right then and there.

                He pulls away and ruffles my hair with that lazy smile on his face, snatching a chip in the process, and I don’t know if I can handle being just friends with him anymore.

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I love Baekhyun, but he just fit the bully image the best.  :P  And sorry, I have a thing for Sehun's Adam's apple if that wasn't obvious lol.  Thanks for reading!