October was a beautiful month. He had shoulder cancer in his right shoulder which was his throwing arm. He went through chemo and seemed to be getting better. We spent alot of time in his room in that bed of his, just laying there. I would be there eveyrday filling him in on school and everything. There, I would watch him listening and my hair.

At the end of october his hair began falling out. It was so hard to watch but he was still the most handsome boy. Sometimes we would walk to our park when he was feeling good and enjoy the fading sunshine. We watched alot of movies, alot of classics and I read a thousand books in that bed but I stayed strong, just for him. In our first relationship, he was strong for me... Showing me how to love myself by loving someone else. Showing me how beautiful and important I was to the world.. And now it was my turn. I would cook for him and tell him stories and treat him like nothing different. I gave him my whole heart that month. I showed him how important and beautiful he was to me. Things were looking good back then.

On November 6, he finds out but does not tell me. He found out that his cancer has spread to his brain and he has developed 5 tumors. He convinces the doctors to give him this one last weekend. That weekend, he took me out to a really nice resturant the first night. We got all dressed up. Then we came back to his house and watched a movie, I actually fell asleep in his arms. The next day, we went to the beach in the morning and then a muesum in the afternoon. I can’t put it into words, but the the whole weekend was perfect. our perfect weekend.

When Monday came, he told me about the tumors and was admitted into the hospital. I smiled and kissed him. I told him we would make it through all those bad times. That night, I cried endlessly, so sad and scared for him. I was destroyed but I had to stay strong for Sungmin.

Things got worse very quick, everything was falling apart but we were staying strong. Our love seemed to last through it all. Even when Sungmin got really really sick, like deathly sick, I would hold his hand and tell him everything that was going on. That weekend, his final weekend, I gave him the white bear he had given me when he was asking me to be his girlfriend, and I told him it would protect him when I couldn’t. We cried. I gave him his final kiss on November 16.