“Jaemin and Jeno asked if we all wanted to hang out tonight,” Renjun spoke. It was a few days since they’d all met at Dolores Park. Although things had mostly returned to normal for Mark, Renjun, and Chenle, the idea that they could go out and be wild with their new friends made everything that much more exciting. Plus, Mark now had a new friend in Donghyuck. They had texted every day since they met.

“Tonight? It’s already eleven pm; our parents won’t let us out this late,” Mark responded.

“We’re already crashing at Chenle’s anyways. Your parents won’t snitch us out to our parents, right?” Renjun asked Chenle.

“Yeah; they’ll be cool. They like you guys,” Chenle responded.

“Alright, awesome. I’ve confirmed our plans. We’re gonna meet them at Chenle’s.”

“Will Donghyuck be there?” Mark asked nervously.

“Ask him yourself. He’s your damn boyfriend,” Renjun responded.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” Mark protested with red ears.

“Not yet, at least,” Renjun mumbled as Mark reluctantly typed out a message to Donghyuck.

Are you hanging out with Jeno and Jaemin tonight? Mark wrote.

Duh, Donghyuck almost immediately replied. Wouldn’t miss it for the world. I’m excited to see you again

“What’s with that smile?” Renjun asked as Mark beamed at his phone.

“Donghyuck is excited to see me!” Mark cheered in response. “But what do I say to that? I wanna let him know I’m excited too but I don’t wanna come off as over enthusiastic or clingy but I don’t want him to think I’m disinterested, you know?”

“Just say ‘you too’. Simple and casual,” Renjun responded.

“But that sounds like I don’t care,” Mark whined.

“But isn’t that what you were going for?” Renjun asked.

Mark sighed and turned to Chenle.

“Can you help me?”

“Say 'you too' with the smiley face emoji,” Chenle responded.

“Emojis? Now that’s getting into dangerous territory,” Mark responded.

“Exclamation point?”

“I think that’s the best we’ve got, Chenle.” Mark picked up his phone.

You too! Mark typed before sliding his phone far away from him.

“Oh god, that was totally the wrong thing to say,” Mark groaned.

“It’s literally a ing text!” Renjun responded just as Chenle’s front doorbell rang. Chenle raced up to get the door, and Mark and Renjun followed him.

Jeno, Jaemin, Donghyuck, and Jisung were standing outside Chenle’s front door, wearing their usually funky, trendy clothes, although now Jeno was carrying a fairly full backpack.

“Hey !” Jaemin cheered, gripping Renjun into a tight hug before pulling Chenle and Mark in too. Mark felt a bit strange, but not as uncomfortable as he thought he would’ve been having a near stranger hug him.

“Let’s go,” Jeno spoke, beckoning everyone out of the house. It was already quite dark at this point; the roads illuminated only by the streetlights. The air was nippy and a sharp breeze blew, but Mark wasn’t cold. It wasn’t often he was out at night like this; it made him feel like he was the kind of person that went on adventures.

“Where are we even going?” Chenle asked.

“I was thinking we’d go to Michaelangelo Park and chill,” Jaemin responded.

“Michaelangelo? I played in that park all the time as a kid,” Renjun responded.

“Me too!” Chenle added.

“I think all of us did,” Donghyuck said.

Luckily Chenle’s house wasn’t too far from the park, just a few steep hills up the road. They were silent as they trekked up the hills, their loud panting soon filling the night air.

“I think,” Donghyuck started between his heavy breaths. “I need to work out more.” Everyone laughed as much as they could, and they finally reached the park.

After a quick breather, Jaemin went over to the metal gate and checked out the lock. He shook it, the noise of metal reverberating through the empty street, before going back to the others.

“It’s locked.”

“I think we can climb over the back entrance,” Jeno responded. The others shrugged and they walked a few more paces up the hill. There was a short wooden door, leading to an upstairs picnic table and the top of the play structure.

Jaemin took half a second to size it up before hitching his leg over and climbing into the park.

Jeno handed his boyfriend his backpack and climbed over, the others soon following.

From this high point, Mark could see the entire park. Standing in the area where parents put out snacks for their kid’s birthday parties, he could see the little stage where he’d had his preschool graduation. He could see his favorite tree, the one with the branch he’d broken off when climbing it when he was ten, when it hit him that he was too heavy to climb trees, that childhood was over. He could see the wall he and his friends would climb up, where his mom would yell at him to come down because she’s always been overprotective. He could see the steps where the neighborhood moms would get wine drunk while watching their kids play on Friday afternoons. He could see the little grassy area, where kids would pee (since the park didn't have a real bathroom) and the nectar out of little white nameless flowers. He could see the water fountain his friends had turned into irrigation systems in the sand. He could see the little room at the bottom of the playground where he’d have secret meetings with club members. He could see the wobbly bridge, the one that he laid on top of when he was three years old that his mom has a picture of in her scrapbooks. He could see the wooden ledge holding up the big slide, the ledge where he’d cried when he was rejected by his three year long crush in the sixth grade.

It was crazy. He’d grown up in a big city, but it was like he had a small town childhood, with close knit friends and family. But as he’d gotten older he’d just become more and more disconnected until he felt entirely isolated.

“Let’s go,” Donghyuck said, and Mark could hear a teenage life’s worth of memories in his voice. It made him feel not so alone.

They walked down through the play structure, over the wobbly bridge, to a square with the metal slide that shocked many a kid in hot summers past.

They sat in a circle, leaning against the bars and giant tic tac toe squares, and Jeno opened his backpack.

“Who wants a drink?” Jeno asked, pulling a massive bottle of Captain Morgan rum out of his backpack.

“Me,” Donghyuck responded, immediately stealing the bottle and taking a large swig. He looked at Mark, who was sitting to his right, and handed him the bottle.

“You look like you need it,” he said.

“I do,” Mark responded, chuckling softly. He eyed the bottle a bit; he’d never drank before. But now seemed as good of a time as ever to try, so he tipped his head back and took a sip.

He immediately gagged.

“That’s so gross!” He whined, shaking his head and passing the bottle to Jisung.

As the bottle made its way around the group, Jeno began to pull more things out of his bag: a lighter, a large hoodie, a pack of cigarettes, and an unusually large amount of gum. Jaemin immediately reached for the hoodie, wearing a guilty smile.

“I always have to pack Jaemin a jacket,” Jeno explained.

“You want to dress ty,” Jisung said to Jaemin. “But you don’t have the follow through to withstand the cold.”

“ off,” Jaemin mumbled in a response, a smile on his lips.

The bottle was a little more than halfway drained when it made its way back to Donghyuck. He put it in the middle but Mark reached for a sip. It tasted disgusting, but Mark wanted to see what tipsy felt like.

“That was a big sip, my dude,” Renjun commented, leaning against the edge of the slide.

“It wasn’t that much,” Jaemin responded.

“It’s a lot for Mark,” Renjun said.

Donghyuck looked over at Mark for a long moment.

“Cute,” he mouthed.

“What?” Mark asked. Donghyuck shook his head.

“Nothing,” he responded with a smile, turning back to the others.

The drunkenness creeped up on the seven boys slowly. The dark atmosphere and cool night breeze cast a reflective shadow over the evening; tonight they were sad drunks. It smelled like liquor and Jisung’s mango juul and it didn’t smell so much like childhood anymore, it was off.

“When I was little.... I was so sad,” Jeno said, his voice slow and drawn out.

“Little kids aren’t sad,” Chenle responded.

“I was,” he quietly spoke. He sighed and reached for Jaemin’s arm. “I thought the other kids hated me, even though they didn’t. I just... I didn’t like myself then, I guess.”

“Emo hours here at Michaelangelo Park,” Renjun commented.

“I feel that Jeno,” Jisung mumbled quietly.

“I was a really annoying kid,” Donghyuck said. “Loud and . I had a lot of friends. I... I felt the same way as you guys, I just compensated in a different way.”

“You still are,” Jaemin teased.

“ off,” Donghyuck whined with a giggle.

“Anyways, Jaemin, what’s your deal? How come you’re so happy all the time?” Renjun asked.

Jaemin shrugged. “I dunno; it’s just easy for me. The only time i can think of where I was really sad for a long time was the month.”

“What’s the month?” Mark asked.

“We don’t talk about the month,” Jeno said firmly.

“In freshman year they got in a big fight and broke up for a month,” Donghyuck explained.

“Why did we even break up?” Jaemin asked, looking up at Jeno, who had his arm wrapped around Jaemin’s shoulder.

“I don’t even know... all I remember is you saying you wasted your best years on me.”

Jaemin laughed. “Wow, I really said that at the age of fourteen.”

“You thought the best years of your life.... were middle school years?” Chenle asked incredulously.

“Okay, maybe I’ve always had a bit of a dramatic streak,” Jaemin admitted.

Everyone laughed a bit too loud, the mood lifted as they all took another swig. Jisung opened his sketchbook, squinting his eyes at Chenle.

“What are you doing?” Chenle asked.

“Drunk drawings are the best drawings,” Jisung mumbled, whipping out a pen and starting to draw. “You, come here too,” Jisung added, beckoning to Renjun. Renjun came and leaned his head on Chenle’s shoulder, humming softly.

Jaemin whispered something in Jeno’s ear and the two of them giggled, standing up and taking each other’s hands and running off to who knows where.

Mark sighed gratefully. Again, he was in a group, but alone with Donghyuck. He liked hanging out with his new friends but there was just something about Donghyuck, something about him that Mark just needed to be near. Something that Mark effortlessly understood.

Donghyuck was quiet but he reached his arm around Mark’s shoulder, shielding from the freezing cold San Francisco summer night wind. In a moment of drunk confidence, Mark leaned and rested his head on Donghyuck’s shoulder. He smelled good, like leather and middle school girl perfume. Mark’s vision swam but Donghyuck played with the little hairs on the back of his neck, holding him steady to the world.

“Who knew alcohol could make you so sleepy?” Mark mumbled.

“Most people,” Donghyuck responded. Mark looked up, and Donghyuck was smiling. He was being teased, but he couldn’t stop himself from smiling back.

“You smell like bath and body works,” Mark said quietly. Donghyuck flushed pink; Mark could tell he was embarrassed.

“Don’t call me out like this,” Donghyuck responded in the softest voice.

“You actually like it?” Mark asked with a tiny giggle.

“Guy’s cologne is nasty,” Donghyuck whined back. “It smells like the locker rooms I’d get beat up in in middle school.”

Mark hummed and thought for a moment. “It does smell like that.”

The noise of creaking metal distracted Mark and Donghyuck from each other, turning around.

“Are you guys making out on the wiggly bridge?” Mark asked Jeno and Jaemin, giggling loudly. Jeno and Jaemin stood up, brushing their pants off.

“So what if we were?” Jaemin shouted back teasingly.

“Okay, you have just ruined my childhood,” Mark responded.

“Mine too,” Donghyuck added.

“Ew, were they making out on the wobbly bridge?” Jisung whined. “Kids in my grade used to spit on it so other kids would slip and fall.”

Jeno and Jaemin shared a look, grimacing at each other.

“You should’ve warned us!” Jeno whined loudly.

“How was I supposed to know it was Jeno and Jaemin gross time in public?” Jisung responded, taking a hit off his Juul and coughing the sweet smoke everywhere.

“Hey!” An incredibly loud and grumpy voice shouted from the houses next to the park. “It’s one am! People are trying to sleep!”

Now all the boys shared a grimace. “Sorry!” Donghyuck shouted back.

“Get outta there or I’m calling the police!”

Now the boys really panicked, reaching for their things and running up the steps to hop the fence.

“Will do sir!” Donghyuck shouted back. Jisung glared at him as one by one, they climbed over the wooden door.

They breathed sighs of relief as they tread down the hills.

“Mark?” Jeno suddenly asked. Mark whipped around. “Can we talk to you?” Mark nodded, and Jaemin and Jeno tugged him behind the rest of the other boys.

“So... you and Donghyuck have been... flirting?” Jeno asked. Mark blushed and shyly nodded.

“I mean...I think so...” 

“He’s been nice to you so far?” Jaemin asked.

“R-really nice,” Mark responded. They both hummed.

“Good, good. That’s good,” Jeno said quietly.

“See because.... Donghyuck’s a really nice guy. Like, he’s super cool and nice. He’s just....”

“He’s a lot,” Jeno finished for Jaemin. “He has his issues. He’s done some . I just... I dunno. You’re so sweet and I just don’t want you to feel... pressured. By him or his.... lifestyle, I guess.”

“He would never mean to hurt you....but he might. He might anyways,” Jaemin added.

Mark was too drunk to process their words; he couldn’t really understand the meaning behind what they were saying.

“Is this... a warning?” Mark asked.

Jeno chuckled sadly. “I guess so.”

Just then they reached Chenle’s house, everyone hugging each other tight.

“Let’s meet up more often!” Jaemin said excitedly.

“For sure,” Renjun responded.

Suddenly, Mark felt Donghyuck’s arms wrap tight around him. After what Mark had just heard he didn’t quite know what to feel, so he just sort of patted his back.

“I hope I see you soon,” Donghyuck mumbled.

“Yeah,” Mark responded. “See ya.”

They pulled away and waved goodbye to each other, Chenle shutting the door. Mark was about to make his way to Chenle’s bathroom to wash up when he heard something he couldn’t not listen to.

“Can I talk to you guys?” Mark heard Donghyuck say. There was a deep inflection of anger that Mark had never heard in Donghyuck’s voice before.

“What’s up?” Jeno responded.

“What did you guys say to Mark about me?” Donghyuck asked, and Mark froze.

Jaemin sighed. “I dunno, we were just-“

“You guys know I’ve been cleaning up my act,” Donghyuck interrupted, the anger still there, mixed with hurt. “I’m a mess, yeah, but not ‘I’m gonna ruin Mark’s life’ a mess. A-and anyways,” Donghyuck spoke, his tone becoming softer. “I really like him.” Mark could feel his heart pounding in his chest. “I don’t want you guys to mess this up for me.”

Jeno sighed. “We’re sorry, dude. That was out of line.” Jaemin nodded in agreement.

“It’s alright,” Donghyuck responded. His voice clearly sounded not alright though. “Maybe he’ll still like me.”

He wasn’t wrong. Mark definitely, definitely still liked him.