Music lessons at five in the morning is not something Sehun fancies on a Sunday which is supposed to a holiday. Apparently SM thinks rather differently.

Sehun groans rolling around from his side of the bed till his back hit Junmyeon's back. Junmyeon does a jerky squirm turning his way and mutters something like "get back to your bed" but Sehun never listens. Somehow, every midnight, Sehun finds his way to Junmyeon's bed.

He tackles his hyung in a kind of spooning position and let himself be the small spoon.

"Hunnie," Junmyeon rasps out, still half-asleep, but hugging back nonetheless. "Stay in for five minutes, I won't see you for the whole day."

Sehun giggles. Like full on not-so-manly giggle. He didn't care anyways. Because Junmyeon likes him like this. As his little dongsaeng in need of constant love and attention. The fans will never believe this Sehun who won't leave the bed just because he is in need of extra cuddle hours.

"Hyung." Sehun drawls, a bit pompous from being given the whole unwavering attention. "I don't wanna go."

Junmyeon smiles. A friendly gesture, purely platonic, he kisses the top of Sehun's forehead and threads his fingers through his hair. "It's important for you, Hunnie. They'll teach you the vocal techniques you need to know. It'll help you a lot."

Sehun grumbles. "You are more than enough to be my teacher. Be my teacher, I won't go." A high fetched demand, but Junmyeon has it harder. Neither can he deny Sehun's expectant face staring at him nor he can deny the company. But Oh Sehun always has his way to come first. Be it the company or Junmyeon's non-existing girlfriend, Sehun trusts himself enough to make it to Junmyeon's top list.

Junmyeon rubs his temples, sighing in mixed frustration and stress. "Fine. But a good student you'll be. I'll talk to them."

Sehun almost hugs–the really tight hugs–him like his many plushies but Junmyeon succesgully dodges—he values his life. Seeing the younger smile in relief and nothing else but happiness made his heart swell like a helium balloon. But Junmyeon knows his limits, and also never to let go of the balloon. He may not fear the sky, but flying frightens him yet.

"Why are you on my bed again?" He draws the line. Sehun does back off, Junmyeon sees it in his face.

"Sorry, kinda sleepy."

It isn't just him. They were both scared of flying.

----

"Okay why do you think that you refuse to listen to me when I have been doing my everything and straining my energy to make you learn something?" Junmyeon sighs for the twenty third time, and only a shrug from Sehun. "I know you're trying, but it takes a lot more effort than trying, Sehun."

Sehun stops on his syllables. Indeed he is trying. He just can't do it right. "Hyung...look, I'm trying."

"I know, Sehun. But that's apparently not enough."

The silence in the room is louder than Baekhyun's screams and Jummyeon wanted to topple over the table just to make a sound, any sound. Then he sighs again.

"You've been reading them again, haven't you?" Sehun knows what he meant. He knows the answer. But somehow, they are all the same and it doesn't really convince him anymore.

"Come on, Hunnie."

"Yeah ignore them, I know. Not another pep talk please." Sehun lashes–unwillingly. Of course he knew he should not be reading the comments. And strictly no answer if it's outside the members. But the hate just keeps growing and no matter how much he tries to ignore, they just pop up everywhere. He can say that he'll not think about them, but that doesn't stop his mind from overthinking.

"It's not like you're the only one getting them, Hunnie." Junmyeon's voice was softer now and Sehun hated how overly concerned he sounded. It was unfair, really.

"But I sure am the only one thinking about them." He deadpanns.

Sehun doesn't notice Junmyeon coming closer. Nor does he notice his eyes trying to tell him things that he couldn't really say out loud. It is only when his arms creeps around his waist from the back, pulling him in for a hug, that he feels his presence. Junmyeon is so ing close.

"Not quite." He mutters. "They take away forty percent of my patience which I should've been using on you."

Sehun shrugs.

Junmyeon's head falls on Sehun's back. "But since you're still struggling," He smiles. "We can go through it; together."

Maybe Junmyeon isn't so scared of flying. At least not as much as Sehun does.

"But I—"

Junmyeon had seen him crying. Hell, he was the one holding him in pieces while he cried on his new shirt. But somehow, he still can't trust himself. Yes, Junmyeon said he will help. But for how long? Obviously, forever is not an option. But then what? What will he do when there's no Junmyeon hyung to make lame jokes just to make him laugh–not at the jokes but him, what then? He will probably die out of lonliness. It’s better this way.

"Shh. Hunnie, you have me."

Long time crush is not a thing. Sehun never believed in those overly affectionate relationships that turns from crush to love. Crush is a temporary feeling. It ought to pass. He, oh so deliberately hates the thought of crushes and love and relationahips.

Then again, he is standing in the studio, with Junmyeon hugging him, telling him that they're in this together. Sehun can deny his thoughts, but his heart is so foolish—beating at the wrong places, going faster at the wrong implications, and hoping for the wild dreams which are definitely wrong. 

Long time crush to love? Maybe Sehun hates it even more now.