Jinyoung’s doorbell suddenly rang. He was wondering who it was since it was a Sunday and no one told him that they were coming over.

 

It probably was Jisoo. She probably lied about going straight to their dorms and wanted to surprise him. She did like surprising him whenever she knew he was home alone. He thought. 

 

He walked to the door, looked through the peephole, and opened it.

 

“You really need to stop showing up unannounced.” Jinyoung, obviously annoyed, said to Jackson.

 

“Park Gae! We need to celebrate your last day in inkigayo!” Jackson announced showing a bottle of champagne on his hand.

 

Jinyoung rolled his eyes then welcomed Jackson to his apartment.

 

“It’s only 3 in the afternoon, Jackson. It’s too early to drink.” Jinyoung said while putting the champagne in the cabinet.

 

“Why the attitude, Jinyoung?” Jackson asked obviously irritated by Jinyoung’s tone. “Wait! Oh no. Did I interrupt you and Jisoo again? Is Jisoo here? Jisoo! Don’t need to hide like the last time! Jisoo!” Jackson shouted while snooping around looking for Jisoo around Jinyoung’s apartment.

 

Jinyoung laughed at the sight of Jackson. “She’s not here.” Jinyoung said.

 

He sat on the couch and motioned Jackson to sit.

 

They spent a good 30 minutes catching up with each other and talking about the experiences they both had with inkigayo.

 

“I can sense something is making you sad. It’s because of inkigayo, right? Since you won’t see Jisoo every week anymore?” Jackson asked. 

 

“Yes....and...” Jinyoung deeply sighed. “I’m going to end things with her tonight.” Jinyoung finally got the courage to tell someone what has been bothering him for a few days now.

 

Jackson was taken aback. He wasn’t sure if he was hearing things correctly.

 

“WHAT?!?!” Jackson asked in disbelief, his eyes wide in shock. “I thought things were going smoothly for you two.”

 

“Yeah it is. It actually really is. She’s the best and I couldn’t ask for more.” Jinyoung admitted.

 

“Then why? Why are you stopping whatever is going on between you two? Are you afraid of commitment, Jinyoung?” Jackson asked.

 

“No! Of course not!” Jinyoung defended himself. “If the circumstances were different, we would have been together now. But I’m so scared, Jackson. So so so scared of what might happen if we get caught.”

 

“Jinyoung, why are you focusing on the negative sides of this relationship? Why don’t you focus on the good sides of it?” Jackson asked. 

 

“I just can’t help it. If we get caught it will hurt both of our careers. Our fans might call her names, her fans might call me names.” Jinyoung paused and sighed. “I wish us idols could freely date without being scared of any scandal.”

 

Jackson nodded. He knows Jinyoung is a critical man. He would always think of the consequences that comes with his actions.

 

“Jinyoung, my advise is just enjoy the moment, go with the flow. The CEO is always looking out for us and he wouldn’t let anything happen to our careers as long as we be careful.” Jackson said.

 

“Yeah, I’m really thankful to our CEO for being supportive.” Jinyoung chuckled.

 

“You know, it’s hard to find someone that you can call your home right? It’s not everyday where you find someone that you can talk about every aspects of your life with.” Jackson said.

 

Jinyoung just sat there, absorbing the words Jackson was saying.

 

“Hey, I have to go now. I just wanted to pay you a quick visit and give you your gift.” Jackson said while standing up. 

 

Jinyoung walked Jackson to the door.

 

“Thanks for the advise and the champagne, Jackson.” Jinyoung said while hugging him. 

 

“You’re welcome. Oh! I forgot, congrats on the lead role offer, by the way. Let me know how it goes.” Jackson said.

 

“Oh yeah, it’s still on the process of being finalized though.” 

 

Jackson chuckled. “Not only with that, but also with Jisoo.”

 

“Oh yeah, yeah of course. Will do.” Jinyoung said while closing the door.

 

Jinyoung lied down on the couch and stared at the ceiling. He didn’t know what to do. Jackson was right that it’s not everyday you find a girl like Jisoo. However, fear still crept on his mind.

 

He lied about the part that he was only scared of being caught. It was something much bigger than that.

 

He was afraid that Jisoo was too good   for him. She was part of a group that was not only achieving good things in Korea but also around the world. Insecurity was getting the best of him.

 

What if Jisoo gets hard to reach? What if Jisoo got tired of him? What if Jisoo gets bored with him?

 

So many what if’s are running through Jinyoung’s mind right now.

 

Jinyoung then grabbed his phone to distract himself. He went through his apps, went to his camera roll and swiped through his photos with Jisoo. 

 

He will miss this , he thought. 

 

He will miss taking stolen shots of Jisoo while she’s not looking. He will miss her randomly grabbing his phone and taking a selfie together.

 

Jinyoung now felt tired and sleepy. He set his alarm two hours before the party then slept on the couch.

 

 

 

 

 

~~~

 

Hello! I feel like we’re already nearing the ned of this story. Let me know about your thoughts for this chapter.