SUNGYEOL’S POV

Being a light sleeper, I woke up when I heard some bickering – or more like – arguing in the living room. I just realized that I and Myungsoo have fallen asleep while hugging each other. Well, what's new? We usually feel asleep in that position since the start of our relationship. The warmth that Myungsoo emits every time he hugs me is enough to be my lullabye and lull me to my dream land. Slowly, I removed his arms around my waist and get up from my bed to check what is happening in the living room.

Myung-myung, you really sleep like a log. I silently giggled to myself. Day by day, as our relationship grows longer, I feel that my love for him is growing stronger and I really hope that no one can destroy the love that the two of us are sharing.

I silently crept inside the living room, just to find out that our leader and our maknae in a tensed situation. With the dark aura that our leader is giving off, I can conclude that any time now, he will pounce on our maknae and strangle him to death. Even from the place where I am watching them, I am suffocated with the heavy atmosphere that is surrounding the two of them. I wonder why the two of them can still breath in their current situation. I can see that the way our leader gripped Jongie’s wrist was so tight. I know that among the seven of us, Jongie has the most sensitive skin and the way Gyu-hyung is holding him will surely leave a nasty bruise. I also notice the looks in Jongie’s eyes. I can’t see the usual luster it has despite of the unshed tears. And it’s like that Jongie keeps on shaking his head every now and then.

 “Hyung, what’s the noise all about? It’s already nearing midnight but you two are still bantering over something.”

I jokingly asked, deciding to break the building tension.

“It’s nothing Yeollie-ah, I am just asking Jongie about his day and for him to do me some favor.” Gyu-hyung answered while Jongie flinched. It is really hard to read Jongie’s facial expression. But I feel that something is wrong. And when I say wrong... it is as in... REAL wrong. I can feel the sense of dread hanging by the corner. I know, what is happening now won't turn out to be good.

“Ya, maknae, don’t be so hard to our leader. You know our poor and old leader can’t stay mad at us. It’s not good for his heart,” I teased our maknae. Ever since that we are trainees I loved to tease Jongie, I found his expressions amusing. I like how his beautiful face portrayed his emotion. But now, he just stared down on the floor blankly, no expressions - not even a single bit of emotion on his face, considering the fact that everytime I before, he would give me a tight-lipped smile or a devilish and loopsided smirk or a glare that promises a torturous death.

This time, Jongie remain silent. I hope that he won’t mind those little teasing that I said. But seeing him like that, as his eyes widened for a fraction of second, I feel that something is really amiss.

He murmured some words that I can’t clearly decipher before he yanked his wrist off Gyu-hyung’s grasp. I watched him carefully and I can sense that his breathes are becoming ragged. He stumbled for a while and lost his footing before he steadied himself and run directly to the front door.

“Where are you going?” Gyu-hyung asked after he snapped out of some trance that he was in after Jongie yanked his wrist off.

“AWAY FROM YOU AND YOUR OBNOXIOUS ORDERS!” Jongie shouted without looking back at us as he ran out our dormitory.

“Jongie, wait…” I said as I laid a comforting hand on his shoulder. He flinched and he shrugged my hands off.

“Just go back to your room and snuggle with Myungsoo.”

Is he somewhat jealous because I’m in relationship with Myungsoo? I thought to myself. I know before that Myungsoo has some infatuations on our maknae but that was a long time ago and I’m sure he is totally over it. Now I know that something is really wrong. I stared confusingly at Gyu-hyung, seeking for an answer. I maybe a choding but there still a mature side of me that only few people now. Before Sunggyu-hyung can answer, one of our managers entered.

“Any problems kids?” Jungryul-hyung asked us. Sensing that the two us won’t answer because we remain rooted on our spot he continued.

“What’s wrong with Sungjong? Why is he running outside with only his sleeping clothes on?”

=0=0=0=

SUNGJONG’S POV

“Ya, maknae, don’t be so hard to our leader. You know our poor and old leader can’t stay mad at us. It’s not good for his heart.”

After hearing this from Sungyeol-hyung, I really felt disappointed. I knew that he is just joking but it hurts like hell.

Am I that invisible in this group? Is my feeling not important enough for them to care about me and my welfare? Of course, they only see me as a joke. After all, I always vent my anger for them on my poor bear. It will always be my role - to be the receiving end of their anger, frustations, jokes, and bullying.

Truth be told, I just want to be acknowledged for who I am and not for what I am on TV and broadcasts. I want to feel that I am a part of INFINITE even for a short time and I am essential to that group.

I can feel that breathing became a little difficult because of the raging emotions within me. But I need now is to be away from them and from this dorm... from this HELL. With all the remaining strength that I have, I managed to yank my wrist from Sunggyu-hyung’s grip. I stumbled and lost my footing but once I regained my balance I run straightway out of our dorm.

“Where are you going?” I heard Sunggyu-hyung asked. My head is so hazy that I can’t think straight.

“AWAY FROM YOU AND YOUR OBNOXIOUS ORDERS!” I shouted back as I ran out our dormitory. I don’t have the strength to look at them.

“Jongie, wait…” I feel Sungyeol-hyung laid a comforting hand on my shoulder. Out of my instinct, I flinched and I shrugged his hands off.

“Just go back to your room and snuggle with Myungsoo.” I know I sound jealous but honestly, I love Myungsoo-hyung. I always have loved him and I will always love him.

Despite of the pain I am experiencing I continue running away from our dormitory. I meet Jungryul-hyung in the lobby but I ignored him and continue to run out of our dorm to the nearby park. I want to have a peace of mind for awhile.

15 minutes later, I arrived at my destination and sat on the swing. I stared blankly on the darkness before me.

I needed to be alone but I need someone to comfort and accompany me. Someone that can truly accept me and love me, someone that I could trust and love back despite knowing the truth about me.  Someone that I can lean on.

Realizing that it was late, I decided to call the person who always remains by my side for the last few months. The person that I can trust and rely on right now but not as a replacement for my love to Myugsoo. I wish he is still awake, I really need his company.

Luckily, I have put my phone on my sweatpants’ pocket before I got confronted by the old hamster. Scanning the phonebook for his number, I did not think twice in pressing the call button. I know that it’s late and I am disturbing him and his well-deserved rest at this moment yet I am yearning for his company.

After ringing for a few times, I heard someone answered.

HYUNG…

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okay, i want to be honest to all of you, I really have forgotten about this ff until someone reminded me about it...

So, risible, this is for you... and to my favorite author, deliberatemistake, this is also for you...

I hope you enjoy this update...

Subscribe and comment please...

Bye!!!