answer
My Way To You
Walks are normal but right now Jin’s heart is pounding and his stomach is turning. His lips feel chapped. His throat runs dry. In his head, the thoughts won’t stop. He quietly goes through words to say, mentally preparing so he doesn’t get derailed when he is face to face with his roommate.
He woke up today finally ready to acknowledge his feelings. He spent all morning thinking how to put them into words. When he left Taeyeon's place, she had cheered him saying Goodluck! Even though he didn't say a word about his plans. At least not until after executing it. But then she probably already knew. She always knows.
He went straight to the dorm, but the entire afternoon, there was no sign of his roommate. He spent the afternoon going around the campus looking for Taehyung but failed to catch a sight of him.
And then he remembered, the place that reminds his roommate of his hometown is where he'll probably find him.
So here he is.
Under the pergola, face to face with his younger roommate, Kim Taehyung.
Taehyung immediately meets Jin’s gaze. The younger one feels his knees freeze like a child getting caught red-handed for mischief. He wasn’t expecting his roommate to show up in this secluded part of the campus. He was here minding his own business being angsty at his first heartbreak. But then the subject of his affection suddenly appears like a beam of light in this gloomy afternoon.
Jin on the other hand tightens his lips into a line, trying to collect his thoughts and review his lines. The ones he'd been practicing since the morning. He was doing okay until Taehyung acknowledged him with a smile.
I’m fine. Jin reiterates to himself. It’s just Kim Taehyung.
"Sunbae..."
"Kim Taehyung you asked me a question. Do you still wanna hear my answer?"
"Yes."
“Aren’t you tired?”
"What do you mean sunbae?"
“Why haven't you given up? I rejected you many times.”
“I'm not someone who gives up easily. So unless sunbae decides to hate me from the bottom of his heart, I'm not giving up. I don't mind waiting. Even if I don’t know how long, I still want to walk with you. Though I would prefer to walk beside you, but I can wait, I don’t mind being behind you right now.”
“You do know that we’re both guys right?”
“Yes. I know.”
“You’re also aware that I’m older than you.”
The younger one nodded.
“You know that we are very different, that’s why we have disagreements often and we might fight a lot.
“It doesn’t matter how it started. If we’re going to fight, then let’s do it until we’re exhausted yet satisfied. I’m not giving you up for things that haven’t happened yet. I want to know more about you. I want to be together with you.”
"Two guys being in a relationship isn't something accepted by society, yet despite knowing all that, do you still like me?”
"Yes. Absolutely.” Taehyung gives him a thumbs-up. "No problem."
Jin didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the other's serious expression whilst doing that gesture.
“Sunbae, I'm sorry I left you at the rooftop. Back then I was scared. I wasn't ready for your answer yet, and I'm not sure if I'm ready now but I will listen." Taehyung paused. “Kim Seokjin, I like you, a lot. What about you?"
Jin's cheeks flushed pink. He's overwhelmed and unconsciously takes a step back.
"Are you running away because you’re shy or have you really come to hate me?”
“I... I don’t hate you. It's just... I'm no good with romance."
"It’s not that you can’t handle love. It’s more like you don't want to get into things that you aren't sure about. You don't want to fail, including in romance because that would mean you'd get hurt. But don't worry sunbae, I don't wanna get hurt too so I'll try my best to make us work." Taehyung smiled warmly. "When I got sick, you scolded me for not taking care of myself. When the dorm had a blackout, you chased after me barefoot to make sure I wasn’t stuck in the elevator. Even though you were busy, when I needed someone to teach me English, you tutored me. Stuff like that, all of it screams ‘I like you’ to me. It’s okay, you don’t have to say it. I’ll wait until you’re ready to say it back.
"You're right. You've expressed your feelings multiple times. Even during my sleep. But I’ve been going around in circles. And have done nothing but run away.
"Wait!" Taehyung's eyes widened. "How do you know about the confession?"
"I was awake."Jin said. "That time. The you who I only saw as a junior said that."
"I don’t want to acknowledge that I’m more immature than I already am.
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