Obviously I am not dreaming. It hurt me when I fell down. I can hear the voices getting nearer and nearer. It wont be long until they reach me.  One thing in mind I need to lose them. I used the garage door to go out without them knowing. 

 

I can still hear them from the distance. I felt someone tap my back. I was in a fight stance. It was Tyler. Did he do this to me? The guy wearing a mask. Friday night in Mid december. I was and hopeless. 

 

"Look Amber. Let me help you I know you are really confused but trust me I can help." He got his phone dialling something from it. Before he turned to me I mindlessly run my way at the end of the street leading to a dark alley between two office buildings. There are no people walking, judging from the time now. I looked at my back and I can still see two men following me. I hid behind the dumper. I know I will probably smell like but hell cares. I need to see Krystal. I need her. What the hell happened to me that I lost the grip on reality and now I am in this mess. 

 

The voices stopped. I think I lost them. I stood and now I know where should I go. 

 

---

I limped my way to the hospital which is ten block trek from where I have been. I was having a hard time making my to the E.R at 3:40 am. 

 

I hate hospital. Krystal got admitted once for overworking because she was anemic. Good thing it was nothing serious. Im scared of losing people I love. It was not a good time. 

 

On my way I saw people who got into an accident. A man with a cast on his leg, a boy in a wheelchair. It wasnt long when someone assisted me asking me if I need anything. I didnt answer right away so she asked. 

 

"Did you get into an accident?" She asked and I shook my head. 

 

"Your face is full of cuts."

 

"I'm not well."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"I need to talk to someone?"

 

"Are you homeless?" Again I shook my head. 

 

"Where is your family?"

 

"I dont know." She studied me from head to toe. 

 

"What's your name ma'am?" 

 

"Amber Josephine Liu."

 

 

"Just wait here." She said before she disappear around the corner. After a good minute she appeared escorting me to a patient room. I got seated on the examination table. A lot of things happened to me and I felt so tired of all of a sudden. I almost fell asleep sitting straight up if not for a young doctor coming inside the room.

 

"Hello Amber. You mind if I call you that?" He came with a different nurse. A blonde one wearing scrubs.

 

 

"I'm Richard Adams, your attending physician. What brings you here in the E.R?"

 

"I think something is wrong with me, like a tumor or something."

 

"What makes you think you do?"

 

"My house is not my house."

 

"I'm sorry but I'm not following. Please explain further."

 

"You know I know it may sound crazy but it isnt my home. My family isnt there. The interior looks like it was renovated. It was so much nicer and smelled different."

 

 

"But its still your address?" I nodded.

 

"So you're saying the inside is different but the outside is err- the same?" He asked as if talking to some child. I nodded nevertheless.

 

"Yes."

 

"Amber how did you get all those scratches and cuts on your face? Why is your clothes dirty?"

 

"People were chasing me."

 

"chasing you." I nodded.

 

"who are chasing you?"

 

"I dont know."

 

"Do you in any case know why are they after you?"

 

"It's...hard to explain." He had this skeptical look in his face when he turned to his nurse after taking some notes. I almost missed it because it was subtle and really quick. 

 

"Did you have a drink?" I thought about it I did when I was with Jong in but thats like hours ago.

 

"Just a glass scotch on the rocks but it was ages ago. Like 9 hours ago." 

 

 

"have you taken any drugs?" I looked at him like he has grown two more heads. I know everything I was saying is crazy. Heck I even thought Im dreaming so I wont blame them for being skeptical. He cleared his throat.

 

"I'm sorry it has been a long shift. Why are you saying that is something is wrong with you again?"

 

 

"Because the last 7 hours of my life doesnt make sense."

 

"Did you suffer from any head injury?" I thought about it. The guy who made me faint hit the back of my head.

 

"No. I mean Im not sure but someone hit me at the back of my head and it is painful to touch."

 

"Did you take any drugs or medication? Now or in the past?"

 

"I smoked weeds sometime in the past but recently I havent taken anything."

 

"I will ask Jenny to draw some blood. Mind if I examine you?" He took a penlight from his lab coat after I nodded. He drew near me until we're inches apart that I can even smell the stale stench of coffee on his breath. He shone the light right straight on my right eye. For a moment, I cant see anything aside from the light.

 

"Did you ever try hurting yourself?"

 

"I'm not suicidal." I answered shortly.

 

 

"Have you had any prior psychiatric hospitalizations?" I shook my head. He gently put his soft cold hand on my wrist to get my pulse rate.

 

"What do you do for a living?"

 

"I teach at Maxwell College."

 

"Married?" I nodded and instinctively runs my fore finger in the wedding band on my hand. Which was gone. I. Jesus. 

 

The nurse began to roll my sleeve

 

"What's your spouse's name?"

 

"Krystal."

 

"You two okay?"

 

"Yes." 

 

"Dont you think she is worried about you? Have you tried calling her?" 

 

"I tried. A while ago at my house."

 

"What did she say?"

 

"Someone else answered. It was wrong number."

 

"Maybe you misdialled."

 

"I know my wife's number." 

 

"Are we okay with the needles Dr. Adams?" The nurse asked and the doctor nodded. She began disinfecting the underside of my elbow. She touched the needle marks in my arm where I think the people in the lab drew some blood sample.

 

 

"Dr. Adams you have to see this." the nurse said showing the needle marks on my arm.

 

"When did this happen?" Dr. Adams asked and I figured out it wont be safe to tell them the laboratory I came from. 

 

"You dont know who stick a needle on your arm?"

 

"No."

 

"Alright then. Little pinch is coming he said." the nurse drew some blood from me. 

 

"Give your wife's number and I'll try calling her. I will inform her about you." I scribbled her name and number on the piece of paper they gave me. 

 

---

They transferred me in a private room in the ninth floor. I tidied myself and kick off my shoes. I hop into the bed trying to put myself to sleep but the scientist in me cant stop thinking.

 

My mind it keeps on running. Hypotheses, formulating why and how did this happened. I looked at my finger and noticed that there is a mark left in the base of it. A proof that a ring was there. It is true that I am married. Krystal my wife. Dani our little angel. But what if this mark is gone? Then it means I have no anchor to what I have or is it had now?

 

Tiredness came back and it hit me like a freight train. My head began to ache. That was the last thing I remember before drifting off to sleep.

 

---

Krystal's hands were deep in a warm soapy water when she heard the front door slammed. She stopped scrubbing the pan she was washing since a while ago and looked back to see who is the person who came.

 

Amber appeared in the hallway that connects the dining and the kitchen. She was grinning like a fool.

 

Krystal turned her attention back to the dishes and said. "There's a plate for you in the fridge."

 

She watched her wife put down the grocery back on the island and shook his head.

 

"If you think that couple of tubs of ice cream will save your this time. You are gravely mistaken." She half kidded. 

 

"I know but life is too short to be mad. Dont you think?"  she whispered as her body presses its way to the lady doing the dishes.

 

"How did the forty five minutes turned an hour before midnight huh?"

 

"The same as one turns into two then three until I lost count. Cant you forgive me?" Amber spun Krystal around pouting like a child. A rose in hand and obviously Krystal was surprised but still mad.

 

"You are not getting out of this." She said sternly before turning around to go back to the thing is she doing. Not for long, she felt Amber's lips on her neck, nibbling and teasing. Amber hands went deep to the warm water and interlaced her fingers with Krystal's. The kisses wont stop and made its way down to the base of her neck. 

 

"You should eat something. I will heat it for you." 

She tried to make his way to the fridge but Amber blocked her way.

 

"Yah! Move-" she was cut off but a pair of lips kissing her with such passion that it felt they just saw each other after a long time.

 

"God I miss you Jung Soojung." It was another first after all these years since she heard her call her that.

 

"Exactly how many did you have-" another fierce kiss come stopping her. Krystal's back was pressed on the sink. Amber's hands roaming on her curves. Touching and feeling its way underneath her shirt. It was hot. Hotter than an open fire.

 

"Amber hnggg stop." She pushes her toward island. It gave her time to study her. She wondered where the sudden energy came from after being away for a couple of hours. Her face shows the passion she has. Eyes full of lust. 

 

"Something happened." Krystal said looking at Amber. Amber just tilted her head to the side in confusion.

 

"Nothing. I just lost the track of time making miss my wife and wanting her."

 

"You didnt meet some young blood making you feel 23 again?" Krystal said raising a brow. Amber answered it with a laugh. A laugh sounded so beautiful for Krystal ears.

 

"Silly. You think something like that happened?" She gently cups Krystal's face. 

 

"When I left Jong in, my mind is elsewhere. I almost got hit by a car and killed myself in the process. It scared the out of me. The thought of being gone. Losing you and Dani. I just cant take it. I have these two most wonderful thing in the world and I will lose them in a stupid accident. But ever since that moment, I never felt so alive. In the grocery, I thought about it. My life is perfect. I have you. We have our little angel, Dani."

 

Her anger began to melt with all those confessions.

 

"You know for all these years we had. We eventually stop yearning, missing the thing we have or even being grateful because of these things. It felt like I see things in a different light. Seeing you right now being perfect just by doing the dishes loving me. Our child upstairs sleeping. Those are things I wont give up with a fight. I'm rambling now." Amber said shyly which is exchanged by a chuckle. Krystal cups her face and smiled at her. She gave a soft kiss on the lips then pulled away. She took her hand and drag her on their way up. 

 

She stopped in their daughter's room. Opening the door, checking if she still awake. 

 

"All clear." She said and softly giggle. God, Amber thought I would love to hear more of those.

 

They both stumble on the bed. It was dark and Krystal hand rummages the drawer for the candle. 

 

"No time for that." Amber said pulling her close. Flipping their positions and now Amber on top taking more control.

 

"I love you so bad Jung." She said as she stared at her wife's face.

 

"and I love you as bad Liu." this time no more restraining she kisses her so fierce that it might bled. Her hands roaming under her clothes moving touching her. She felt wetness on her cheeks.

 

Tears. Not hers but Amber's. She is crying.

 

"Hey what's wrong?" She asked gently. The light coming from the moon is enough to see a soft smile placed on her llama face.

 

"I thought I've lost you."

 

"Shhh. I'm here. You have me."

 

 

"I'm just glad to do this with you right now. You are the most beautiful thing that has happened to me." It was the start of their love making. Something extraordinary. Something is different. Something is better. 

 

They werent happy. It was the opposite. After all these years, it was just the first again. The giddyness of love almost making you feel sick but at the same time making you feel the happiest.